“Can we save this conversation for another day?”
“No problem. I’ll be away tomorrow delivering Esperanza to the Buckley ranch. Stew all day if you’d like.” Turning, she stomped out.
Alexa ate a solitary meal and felt more alone than ever. Her cell showed two missed calls, both from her mother. Frankly, she didn’t have the desire or the energy to explain or defend Rafe. For all she tried to defend Bobby, her mother had never changed her opinion.
Alone in her bed later on, Alexa listened to the rain on the roof. She chewed over Rafe’s snarky accusation, then worried about delivering the horse if the rain didn’t let up. Sometime after midnight, she got up and fixed a cup of tea brewed from California poppy and passionflower with a dash of dried lavender. Over the last few years she’d relied on it to combat insomnia, and in less than an hour she fell asleep.
THE NEXT MORNING, ALEXA felt refreshed. The storm hadn’t abated and the night’s downpour had washed a fairly wide groove in the ground in front of the horse trailer she had to hook up to her pickup. She backed up, but wasn’t close enough to connect the hitch. Afraid of getting her pickup stuck, she tried muscling the trailer forward across the ditch. Its two wheels sank into the mud with a solid whump. Alexa wasn’t one to swear, but her thoughts turned the air blue.
Compadre loped up and licked her mud-spattered face as she knelt down to study the situation. She heard Rafe call out to her.“I’m here, trying unsuccessfully to hitch up the horse trailer.” She stood and let the sound of her voice direct him. She wasn’t planning to ask him for help, but now that he’d come out, she wouldn’t refuse his muscle. “It rained so hard last night, it washed a gully between the pickup and the horse trailer. The pickup has no traction, and when I tried to move the trailer over, it got stuck. I hate to ask, but maybe together we can work it free. If you grab the tongue and shove it close to the hitch, I can connect it.”
“Sure. But should you even go in this weather?”
“I promised. I can’t disappoint a child on her birthday, Rafe.”
“Show me how to lift or pull, or whatever.”
Alexa placed his hands on the slick tongue. “Lift and move it forward, please. It’s almost lined up. Once you set the tongue, I’ll anchor it with the pin, hook the chain, and let the pickup do the hard work of pulling it out of the mud. Then I’ll be on level ground and can pull out the ramp and load Esperanza.”
Twice Rafe’s hands slipped off the metal and the tongue fell short of the hitch. “Damn it to hell and back. I can’t see where you want me to connect it, Alexa. You need someone else to help you.”
“You’re really close, Rafe. Can we try again? I’ll guide the tongue. Look! We got it!” Bounding up, she hugged Rafe. “After I drive forward, I’ll come back and connect the lights. If it’s not a huge imposition, could you bring Esperanza out? Last time I delivered a horse up river to Presidio it took half a day so I want to get started. It’s a winding, dippy road.”
“I’d like to ride along,” Rafe said.
Alexa didn’t jump at his offer. “Well, I don’t mind having company to break up the monotony. But, are you going to be okay letting go of Esperanza, Rafe?”
“I’m good. Buying, training and selling horses is a business. I did offer to put money in your operation, you know.”
“Yes, and you’ve been in a snit ever since,” she muttered.
Rafe’s grunt was noncommittal. “I’ll get the mare. Anything else you want from the barn?”
“A dry pair of gloves from the glove bin. You may want a pair, too. Oh, and grab two slickers off the pegs inside the door. When I delivered Jim’s son’s horse, I hit a rock in the road and had to change a flat tire. Not that the odds are great of that happening twice, but I like being prepared.”
It didn’t take long to load up. Alexa chose a well-maintained fire road that angled through the park. “I’m grateful to the park rangers for tending this road. It cuts twenty miles off the trip. Otherwise I’d be forced to drive into Lajitas to connect with El Camino del Rio.”
“I’ve never been as far north as Presidio. We call the southern section plain old River Road. Isn’t the northern part more isolated?”
“Yes, but it’s a pretty drive.” She glanced guiltily over the top of Compadre’s head. “I’m sorry you can’t enjoy the scenery, Rafe.”
“With the window open for Dog, I can smell the river and get whiffs of wet trees.”
“This highway traces the Rio Grande in a series of climbs, dips and twists. I say that so you won’t fret. On a good day, and without pulling a lopsided horse trailer, this drive is like a carnival ride.”
“Why is the trailer lopsided?”
“It’s made to carry two horses. I tried to fasten Esperanza in the center. But I can feel every time she shifts her weight to one side or the other.” There were other pitfalls Alexa didn’t mention to Rafe. Her pickup was old, and in one area known as The Hill, a mile-high upgrade was sure to tax her truck’s aged engine. And on her last trip to Presidio she’d almost hit a cow, because once over The Hill, much of the land near Buckley’s ranch was open range.
If she’d hoped Rafe would be chatty, that was a mistake. He took up a third of the bench seat, and remained silent as a rock.
The tension finally got to Alexa. “Rafe, since we’re going to be in this cab for long miles, why not get what’s bugging you off your chest?”
“Nothing is.” He continued to pet Compadre, and turned away from Alexa.
The collie’s eyes were closed. His swishing tail whipped across Alexa’s leg.
“Like heck,” she shot back. Still, Rafe didn’t unburden his soul.
Soon, Alexa had more to worry about than Rafe’s moody silence. Instead of the storm moving off, the clouds grew blacker. Rain gusted, forcing her to up the speed on the windshield wipers, and she could hear Esperanza growing more restless.
Up ahead she could see the muddy waters of a swollen Rio Grande slapping against its bank. The only plus this time of year—there was zero traffic.
“We’ve come to the limestone cliffs on your side of the road, Rafe,” Alexa said, hoping to take her mind off the worsening conditions. “Until we get to Presidio, this country is desolate except for an occasional adobe home perched on top of those cliffs. This land probably looks the same as it did to the first settlers. I hear those places on the cliffs are mostly summer homes. I envy the owners. They must be able to see all the way across the river into Mexico.” She sighed. “There’s something about flowing water that I love.”
Rafe’s shoulders relaxed. “Me, too. Or I did when I could see. When I was eleven or so, Mike, Joey and I used to float down the Terlingua river on inner tubes. All the way to where it intersected the Rio Grande. If our moms had found out, they’d have whipped our butts.” He smiled crookedly, and it amazed Alexa how that one smile could melt her irritation.
“Boys get to have all the fun. My mother would have freaked.” Her pickup engine choked as she geared down to start the climb up The Hill. Alexa held her breath until the front wheels of the pickup topped the ridge. Then she released a long, heavy sigh.
Rafe stretched his left arm over Compadre and touched her shoulder. “What’s the matter? Is the engine running rough? That was the mother of all sighs.”
Considering he brushed off her questions about what was bothering him, he had some nerve thinking he had a right to ask her the same question. She glossed over her concerns. “It’s raining harder and the driving’s more challenging. Luckily, we’re over the worst part of the road.”
Rafe seemed to accept that explanation. “How close are we to Buckley’s ranch?” he asked.
“We’re just passing through Presidio. His ranch is another ten miles or so.”
Finally they arrived at their destination, and Rafe climbed out to help unload the birthday horse. Wind almost ripped the door from his grasp.
Ordinarily Compadre would have mowed Rafe down to beat him out of the pickup, curious a
s to what was going on. Not today. He paced on the seat from one side of the cab to the other, then with a whimper, hunkered down on the floor.
“What’s wrong with Dog?”
Alexa pulled out the ramp and unlatched the back door of the horse trailer. “He doesn’t like rain. I’m sure it has to do with what happened to him the day I found him half drowned in another bad storm.”
Jim Buckley, his wife and two children braved the rain to watch the unloading. “I expected you to call, Alexa, and cancel,” Jim shouted. “Alexa, Rafe, this is my wife, Heather, my son, Parker, and Devon, the birthday girl.”
“I wouldn’t disappoint a birthday girl,” Alexa said. “Esperanza’s a great horse. You’re one lucky kid.”
“I know. And I love her name, too.” Devon bounced around excitedly on her toes, one hand protecting her eyes from the driving rain. “Daddy, Mama, she’s beautiful,” the girl said as Rafe backed the mare down the ramp. “Oh, I can’t wait to ride her.”
“Honey, you have to wait until the weather clears,” Heather Buckley cautioned. “Right now, we need to get her into her stall.”
Alexa let Rafe go with the horse. She donned a slicker and closed up the trailer before she, too dashed out of the slanting rain into the barn.
Jim Buckley bent to accept his daughter’s bear hug. “Say,” he said, straightening. “We were about to sit down for hot tortilla soup, homemade bread and chocolate birthday cake. Why don’t you two join us, get warmed up and dry off before you set out for home again. There’s plenty.”
“Indeed there is,” Heather seconded.
Alexa fumbled for an acceptable way to decline that wouldn’t hurt these kind people. To her great surprise, Rafe accepted their invitation.
“Hot soup, bread and cake sounds like it’ll hit the spot. What do you say, Alexa?”
She couldn’t believe he’d be willing to eat soup with virtual strangers. It had taken him long enough to get comfortable with eating in front of her. She also had real concerns about a storm that showed no sign of abating. But after all, they’d have to stop to eat anyway. “Something hot for the belly sounds fantastic. First, though, I need to convince my dog to take a turn along your fence. He hates rain.”
“I’ll get him,” Rafe offered. “You go on in out of the weather, Alexa. Is his leash still under the driver’s seat?”
“Yes. But, Rafe, you’ll get soaked.”
“I brought a slicker. Let me do this, Alexa. You have to drive both ways. Walking Dog is little enough.”
“Uh, okay, Rafe. Thanks.”
Jim Buckley turned up the collar on his jacket. “This day’s not fit for man nor beast. Rafe, bring the dog inside afterward. We have a big, lazy mutt. I’ve never known him to twitch an ear when the kids’ friends bring their dogs into the house. If it presents a problem, Parker can put Shad in his room.”
Rafe loped off to the pickup after acknowledging Jim.
Alexa followed the family, but kept turning to watch Rafe.
Did he think she took charge too often? Had he felt the same way about their lovemaking?
On the drive home she wasn’t going to let him off the hook. She didn’t care if she made Rafe uncomfortable. She’d fallen for him, and wanted to see where those feelings would take them. They had miles to travel, and they would iron things out, or it wouldn’t be for her lack of trying.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
DEVON WAS EAGER TO TALK about her barrel-racing plans during lunch. Alexa was surprised Rafe entered the conversation. But he knew some of the top women barrel racers and spoke animatedly with Devon until her mother emerged from the kitchen holding a cake with twelve flaming candles.
They all chimed in to sing “Happy Birthday.”“Blow out the candles, princess,” Jim said, tugging on Devon’s braid. She tried, but all they did was blink and sparkle again.
“Parker, you bought trick candles, didn’t you?” Devon accused when her older brother convulsed with laughter.
“I couldn’t resist, squirt. Here, I’ll put them out and pull them off. Dad got a good picture of your shocked expression.”
“Honestly,” Heather said, turning to their guests. “I apologize for our children’s antics.”
Rafe laughed heartily. “Puts me in mind of things my sister used to pull on me. Making memories that carry you through life is what family is all about,” he mused, looking relaxed and content. Unexpectedly, he slid a hand under the table and lightly squeezed Alexa’s knee.
“Who wants chocolate cake?” Heather said when Parker came back to the table after disposing of the trick candles. No one declined, and Jim cut generous slices while Parker dipped out ice cream. Other gifts were brought out and piled in front of Devon. Once the kids went off to try a new interactive Xbox game Devon got and her brother coveted, Jim handed Alexa a check, completing the sale of the mare.
Pocketing the money, Alexa rose. “Lunch was an unexpected treat, but since it hasn’t stopped raining, we need to head out, I’m afraid. Thanks so much to both of you.”
“Yes,” Rafe added. “You have a great family, Jim.”
Their hosts walked Rafe and Alexa to the door, where they collected Compadre. Before they stepped outside, Jim murmured, “In the barn, before we came in for lunch, I heard Parker asking questions about the army, Rafe. Thanks for that slice of honesty. We’d rather he start with college. He’s so young. Only seventeen.”
“There’s good and bad that comes with a career in the military,” Rafe replied. “As a bronc riding champion I was still a self-centered kid. The army made a man out of me.”
Alexa glanced obliquely at Rafe. That was one of the few positive things she’d heard him say about his army experience.
They parted from the Buckleys and Rafe carried Compadre to the pickup, because the dog fussed about setting foot outside.
Once they were buckled in and under way, Rafe said almost exactly what she was thinking.
“They’re nice people. Their house has the feel…the smell of a home.”
“What’s a home supposed to smell like?”
“Like the Buckleys’. Like Sierra’s. And yours. Haven’t I told you what I like so much about your place? All war zones reek of motor oil, spent explosives and sweat. And the hospitals smell of antiseptic and blood. Your spicy teas and flowery lotions helped me not think of the stench of war. I owe you more than I can say for that, Alexa.”
“Really? I recall the day after you arrived on my doorstep, you hated my tea and accused me of trying to poison you.”
“I was a jerk,” he mumbled, raking a hand through the dog’s fur. “Spending the last hour or so with the Buckleys drove home what I’ve missed by being a career soldier. No home, no wife, no kids.”
Alexa could tell that came from his heart, and she softened a bit toward him. “Don’t say that like your life’s over, Rafe. You happen to be talking to a woman who knows you’re a man in his prime,” she added wryly.
“Right,” he snorted. “I know I’m no great catch in my present condition, Alexa. A condition that’s likely permanent, according to VA docs. I wish I’d told you this before—you gave me a reason to want to live again. Shoot, I know my timing stinks, but I…I…love you, Alexa.”
Stunned by his confession, Alexa blindly struck back. “I find that hard to believe. Let me tell you, buster, these past two days you’ve had a damn funny way of showing it! Love shouldn’t hurt.”
“What do you mean, Alexa!” His voice was rough enough to bring Compadre up to his feet with a sharp bark. “You’re the one who’s been hiding out in the barn since we made love. Hell, I know I was inept in bed. I can’t even open a damned condom. I make more work for you around the house. Today, hooking up a simple trailer, I blew it. You have every right to be mad. I have nothing to offer a woman as capable, as smart and all-together as you are, Alexa. But I needed to say what I feel—like it or not.”
“Rafe, I can’t process this sudden about-face of yours. Surely you don’t think I want to make yo
u feel inadequate?”
“No, I do that fine enough on my own. I don’t expect you to love me back, either. I know it’d be a crap future to foist on you.”
Alexa opened her mouth to object but the pickup was slammed by a wicked crosswind, and a bolt of lightning speared the road in front of them, flashing first on one side of the road, then on the other.
Alexa reared back in her seat. Compadre howled.
“Whoa, take it easy,” Rafe murmured. “If that was lightning, it was darned close.”
“This storm has turned ugly.” Alexa adjusted her grip on the steering wheel. They were approaching The Hill, and the pickup was being buffeted from all sides. Water ran toward her down the steep incline. Clouds hung so low on the horizon, it looked like night instead of midday. The wind and several inches of running water on the road made it difficult to hold the pickup on course. Easing a hand off the wheel, Alexa snapped on the radio. She spun the dial, and picked up a news station from Mexico. She knew a smattering of Spanish, enough to piece together what the newscaster was saying about the Rio Grande flooding.
“Isn’t this highway almost level with the river in spots?” Rafe asked. “If I translated that correctly, the announcer is advising people who live near the river to evacuate to higher ground. Should we turn back?”
“There’s nowhere to turn around. This spot is called The Hill. We’re almost at the top. Maybe going down the other side we’ll be better protected from the wind. Rafe, will you straighten Compadre’s harness? His fidgeting is distracting.”
“Sure.” Rafe felt around the quivering animal. “Somehow he’s got himself unhooked.”
Alexa crested the hill and realized at once she was descending too fast. She pressed on the brake and the empty horse trailer whipped from side to side. Then it fishtailed like a snake. When she overcorrected, the entire trailer flipped on its side. Braking didn’t slow her momentum and water on the road sent her into a slide. She didn’t panic until she saw they were aimed straight for the river. In front of her where the road should level out, there was nothing but swirling dark water. “Oh no, oh no. God no,” she chanted, seeing they had little time to prepare. “Rafe, brace yourself and hang on to Compadre. Unbuckle your seat belt.” She heard his snap, but had no time to undo her own.
The Cowboy Soldier Page 16
