“What’s wrong?” Brian’s voice came low and level, cool and calm. He sounded as if I had nothing to worry about, yet he’d taken the time to conceal us before he asked. His green eyes seemed to glow, even in the shadows.
My hands shook. Excess adrenaline. I had much more to give for the effort of flight. I’d been cut short. I tried to explain what had sent me over the edge. The words tumbled out in a jumble of syllables and panic.
“A man. There.” I lifted a trembling finger and curled it into a fist at my mouth. “He tried to get in the car.” Air shuttered in and out of my chest.
Brian ran his heavy palms over the curve of my shoulders, searching my face for something more. I had nothing left to give. My legs wobbled under me. Brian clutched me to his chest, pressing his cheek against my head and cursing softly into my hair. When he stepped back, something crossed his expression that I’d never seen there before. The protective grip on me loosened and I whimpered as night air rushed over my chest where he had held me to him.
“Go inside.”
He put my back against the wall and jogged toward the parking lot. I ran into the store. A rush of heat from a vent over the door burned my night-chilled skin. The girls laughed. I moved in their direction. A pimple-faced clerk played air guitar behind the counter. My friends were playing the crane game in the farthest corner. I ducked into the bathroom and lost my mind.
Tears sprang forth like a floodgate had opened. Years of repressed tension burst loose without warning and in the most inopportune place. I wiped them fervently with the backs of my hands and fingertips, but the effort didn’t slow them. My legs grew limp and I slid down the inside of the door until my bottom hit the filthy checkered floor. When the tears ran dry, I pulled my knees tight to my chest and rested my cheek on them to catch my breath. This was the moment I’d been anticipating. I’d finally gone crazy. The dreams had infected my reality. No denying it. I’d cracked.
I pulled myself back up the door and splashed my face clean. Beyond the door deeper voices mixed with higher ones.
I left the safety of the bathroom, trembling and splotchy. With any luck, Brian hadn’t told the others what I thought I saw. Uncertainty raged inside me. My imagination had tormented me for years, and in the moment, I didn’t know what was true.
“There you are.” Pixie made large air circles with her arms. “Look at all this stuff Darcy won. They’re going to have to replenish the machine.”
I smiled at Darcy as she maneuvered the crane down once more.
Aubrie bounced over and whispered, “Saw your boy tonight.”
“Brian?” My eyes searched the store for some sign he’d been there and found none.
“Who?” Her face crumbled in confusion. “What? The new guy? Wait. Are you and the new guy a thing? I thought you were into Davis.” Her voice grew out of the whisper. Davis turned from the magazine rack and looked our way. So much for discretion.
“No. I didn’t know who you meant. I mean, I thought I saw him before I came inside.” Argh. My brain burned with embarrassment for a thousand things and toiled over whether I might be hallucinating. Was there a smoking shadowman outside? Had Brian come to my rescue? Lack of sleep did bad things to people. I walked over to the window. No car behind Suzy Sunshine. No Jeep anywhere.
“I thought you were into Davis.” Aubrie followed me along the windows as I searched every inch of the darkened lot.
“No.” I caught a glimpse of him watching from the crane machine and sighed. “He’s really nice. One of the only guys here who’s talked to me. I appreciate that. Being new sucks.” A crazy-sounding laugh trickled out of my chest. Had I imagined it all? Was I that far gone?
“What about Brian? I’ve seen him talking to you. I heard you two had a date the other night?”
Jeez. Who wasn’t watching me these days? I stared into the night. The empty lot mocked me.
“At Buzz Cup? No. He was there when I got there. There’s nothing going on between me and anyone, as far as I know.” Had someone seen us there? Or at the library? He had dropped me off after the library. I spent more time with him than I realized. Every moment we shared went twice as fast as my other moments.
Davis joined us at the window. Suddenly protective of my space, I inched back. He was cute. In an off-limits, super-intense way I didn’t need in my life. I took another baby step back for good measure. Heightened emotions were dangerous.
“Where’s Kate?” Pixie had warned me to stay away from Davis, but what could I do if he showed up all the time? Kate would make my life a living hell, I knew. High school was the same everywhere. Even in Crazy Town, Ohio.
“I’m not with Kate.” His voice quieted. “It’s impossible to date at this school. Everyone already knows everything about everyone. What’s there left to learn?” Wow. That was a predicament I’d never be in. I didn’t even know everything I wanted to know about me, but the guy had a point.
I leaned against the window looking into Davis’s eyes. “I know what you mean.”
“What they aren’t told directly they assume or make up.”
My lips kicked up a little at the corners. “Heard any good scoop on the new girl yet?”
“Well, all I’ve heard about you so far is how everyone wants to see what you sleep in.”
“What?” This time the laugh burst out, gaining the attention of the entire store.
Davis lowered his head and smiled. “I was kidding, but you should laugh more. It’s nice.”
“Good advice.” I tilted my head at him. “What are you doing all the way out here at this old gas station?”
He nodded toward the glass, where a group of guys leaned against an old SUV. “Guys night out. Rick doesn’t card us for beer and it’s a great night for a bonfire.”
I gave the kid behind the counter another look.
“Come on, Elle. Movie time,” Pixie yelled over the rows of snacks and magazines.
“You gotta go.” Davis reached out and ran a fingertip over the back of my hand so lightly breath caught in my chest. The spark he left behind spread a blush up my arm and into my cheeks, especially when he followed me to the door. He held it open for our little group. His bright blue eyes looked mischievous.
The whole way across the lot I stared at the spot where the car had been. Had it ever really been there? I wondered what was real. Inside Suzy Sunshine, the girls went berserk.
“OMG. Davis freaking Stratten is crushing on you!” Darcy looked more like a freshman than I’d ever seen her. She made no attempt to control her high pitch or limit her wild bouncing on the seat behind me.
“He’s not the only one.” Pixie flashed me a million-dollar smile.
“Davis watches you all the time.” Aubrie smiled.
I guess everyone really was watching me. If that was true … My eyes moved to where I’d imagined the car. Maybe I hadn’t imagined anything. A tug deep inside told me I hadn’t.
“You are the absolute luckiest girl to ever attend this school.” Darcy threw a wrist over her forehead and feigned a swoon when I looked in the rearview mirror.
“She won’t be when Kate finds out in about five seconds.”
Small-town fishbowls and irony. Everyone knew everything about everyone in a small town, except I didn’t know anything about the one guy I wanted to know about. Which reminded me.
“Did you guys see Brian Austin tonight?”
Pixie shot me a crazy face. They all confirmed he hadn’t been there, but he had. So had the car and the smoker. They all frightened me. Or were they one and the same? Brian could’ve been in the car. I hadn’t seen the driver’s face or where he had disappeared to. I also hadn’t seen where Brian had come from. Holy crap! He drove me home one night. Knew right where I lived.
“Well?” Aubrie demanded. “Earth to Elle. Are you still lost in those gorgeous baby blues or what?”
“They’re super blue.” I wanted to say, they’re green like emeralds in a jewelry-store window, but that didn’t begin to describe
them and also I knew who they meant. Davis. Pixie pulled onto the street, heading back toward school, as the small group of guys climbed into an SUV by the pumps. Davis lit up a cigarette before closing the door.
The urge to vomit overtook me. I shut my eyes and begged my body to get a grip. Davis smoked. He had walked into the coffee shop the night I saw the light outside the window. Had it been him outside smoking? Did Brian smoke? What was happening? I still felt his large, warm hands on mine, where he’d drawn me into the shadows. But where did he go? Ice ran through my veins. Nausea coiled my tummy. Could the guy I was falling for be the one following me?
Was anyone following me? I wrapped my arms around my middle before a hole erupted there. I was losing myself.
No. I needed to stop blaming my dreams. Something scary was happening. The truth of the thought winded me. I needed to find out who was doing these things. Fast.
“Darcy has a freshman curfew, so we’re moving movie night to her room.” Pixie accelerated around a curve.
“I’m not feeling well. Can you drop me off at our place first?” I kept my eyes averted.
“Aw, no way. Don’t do that because of me. Go ahead. I’ll take a rain check.” Darcy put her head next to the headrest beside my ear.
“It’s not that. I really don’t feel well. I promise to stay up all night with you next time.” A promise easier to keep than they knew.
Reluctantly, Pixie allowed me to dip out on movie night. She told me not to wait up because she thought that’s what I did. I doubted she’d make it home. I’d never seen anyone fall asleep in front of a movie as fast as Pixie could.
“Darcy? Did you hear back about being an office aide yet?” I twisted in my seat to look her way as much as the belt allowed.
“Yeah, right before lunch.” Her voice had lost its enthusiasm. I hoped Aubrie wouldn’t blame her for my going home early.
“Cool. Hey, I’m going to stop in tomorrow and say hi.”
We passed a Jeep a block before arriving at our apartment, and I shuddered at the thought that it might be him, watching. When I climbed out of the car, another car shut down its engine. This car was gray and compact, like a rental. I took the stairs two at a time. Halfway to the door, my legs locked in mid-step. A tiny orange glow brightened and dimmed only a few yards away from my apartment. My mouth popped open and a choked noise rumbled out.
“You okay, man?” A guy with blond highlights and a skateboard stepped toward me. He launched the remainder of his cigarette over the railing with his thumb and first finger.
My head rotated left and right.
“Ready?” The girl from one of the other apartments on our floor, bounced out her door, kissing the guy on his cheek.
“Later.” The guy passed me with a lazy look on his face. The girl trailed behind him chatting excitedly about some party. She waved. Where was campus security for that?
A huge gust of air escaped my lungs. Inside the apartment, I locked the door and used the chain. I left the lights off and moved to the window. The Jeep drove away. The driver was nothing more than a silhouette behind the wheel.
A knock on my door sent terror coursing through me again. I froze. Everything stopped. A humming in my ears warned that I should sit before I fell over. Worst night ever.
“Gabriella?” Dad’s voice. Confusion swallowed the fear, and I shuffled toward the door to the tiny peephole in shock. My dad stood outside staring back at the little hole, looking agitated.
I unlocked the door. Dad pushed himself inside, closing the door behind him. He embraced me as if he hadn’t seen me in a decade. His forehead pinched in the center and his lips turned down at the corners. A tremor played over my hands. Something was wrong.
“Dad, what’re you doing here?” Nervous energy translated well to excitement over our reunion. My arms wound around his waist. I laid my head against his chest and fought back tears.
He pulled me back by the shoulders and looked me over. He mashed his lips together the way he did when he worried. “Looks like you’ve settled in nicely.”
“Yeah.” I locked my arm into his elbow. My breaths were shallow as I pulled him in a slow circle around the room. “I burn meals in this kitchen on a daily basis. The bedroom is covered in clothes I hardly get to wear, and the bathroom is invaded by a tiny punk girl frequently. Consider yourself warned. You’ve seen the grand foyer and magnificent great room.” Our tiny apartment was a direct contrast to the giant old Victorian home my dad lived in now. I loved that one better than all the others before it.
“Well, it’s a heck of a lot nicer than any of the dorm rooms I ever had. Wait until next year when you’re sharing a room the size of your current bathroom with four other girls and sharing the actual bathroom with an entire floor full of coeds. The words community showers ought to help you appreciate this place.” He flopped onto the sofa and pulled me down beside him.
“Coeds?”
He slid his eyes my way.
“I do like it here.”
He furrowed his brow, unsure.
“What’re you doing here?” I touched his sleeve to be sure he was real.
“Well, when we spoke the other night, you seemed unhappy, and I never want that for you. I worried.” He rubbed a hand over his knee. “I stopped by to make sure you’re okay. Like I said, I won’t be that far from you again. I’m sorry. I meant what I said about working around here for a while.” He looked truly heartbroken, as if he’d done me a terrible injustice by going away on business. I never thought he minded traveling.
Emotional from the night’s events, hearing him sound so guilty pushed me over the edge. I threw my arms around his neck, and tears ran free again. “I really miss you, Dad. I hate when we’re apart. I’m not unhappy. I was just homesick.” I wiped my eyes with my sleeve and felt about ten years younger.
He kissed my head and pulled my hair away from my face until I finished crying and sat upright.
I wanted to remove any guilt I might’ve saddled him with. “I like it here.”
“Not too much, I hope.” His eyes narrowed, and I knew he wanted to know about boys. His biggest concerns next to security when he chose Francine Frances had been the boy-girl ratio and campus policies on dating. As if he thought there might be some.
“Why?” I hoped I sounded as innocent as I intended.
“Well, honey.” He stalled before he rallied. “I’d like to move you to a school closer to our new home.” Gentle emphasis hung on the word new. He didn’t mean the latest new home, the one that was my favorite so far. He meant we were moving again.
“What? We’re moving? Again? When? Where?”
“Well, it’s a part of the job. It provides us all the comforts we’re accustomed to, like food and shelter.” His face gave warning. “This time we’re moving west. There’s a small town outside of Dallas where we can set up our homestead. You’ll like it because you can drive into the city anytime you want. You want city life, right?”
I hated that he meant to please me. I didn’t want to move again. “Do we have to?” The words sounded petulant.
“Honey, it’s for the best. Trust me. I wouldn’t ask if there was any other way.” He stared at me. Authority dripped from his words.
“No.”
His eyebrows crept toward his hairline. Would they stop? “No?”
I crossed my arms over my chest. “No. I want to stay this time. I just got here and I like it. It’s my senior year. Next year I’m going somewhere completely different. Let me finish what I’ve started here.” I pleaded silently with eyes I knew looked like Mom’s. “You said you’d be working in this area more. If I move to Texas, then what? We’re separated by a thousand miles again? Can’t you wait to move until the end of the year? You travel all the time anyway. It doesn’t matter where you live. Why not stay at the cabin?” He didn’t jump in or push back. Hope rose in my chest. “Please, Dad.”
His gaze darted over the room. Honestly, if he’d asked me to return to the cabin with him, it
would’ve been harder. Mom was there. Every inch of the surrounding hills and forest reminded me of her. The new houses for every assignment location reminded me she was gone.
“Do we have to go now? Can’t it wait until the end of the school year?”
“I have to move now.”
“I don’t?” Well, this was new territory for me. I didn’t know how to proceed.
“You’ll be going to college in a few months.” He deflated. That wasn’t like him.
“Gabriella, you’ll be eighteen in two months. A year from now you’ll live who-knows-where enjoying college life.” He rubbed his chin. “I’ll be working in the area for a while. You’re right about me being closer to you if you don’t move right away. Maybe I will visit the cabin.”
“Is that a yes?”
He looked weary and older than I’d ever seen him. “If you want to stay here until graduation, you can. I won’t make you leave, but I’d appreciate it if you’d take those self-defense classes the school offers and maybe carry a gun.” The sparkle in his eye told me he only half-joked about the gun.
My cheeks hurt from the ridiculous smile. I could stay. Stay. The word had to settle in. Stay was the opposite of anything I’d ever known.
“If you’re going to be … ” He cleared his throat. “If you’re going to remain here, we’ll need to talk about security.”
Ugh. My stomach sank. I couldn’t talk about school security with Dad. If he had any inkling that I thought someone followed me around my new town, he’d pack my bags immediately and toss me in the car. I said nothing. I waited to see what he thought he knew.
“Gabriella, tell me anything that’s happened since you got here. Anything at all that didn’t seem right to you. The ribbon you found in your locker bothered you. I’m glad you told me, but there might be other things you blew off. Some things, by themselves, mean nothing but together are quite serious.”
“Nothing.” My mind ticked off a growing list—the car with the squeaky belt, the orange glow, feelings of being followed, a guy who had tried to get into Pixie’s car with me, Davis’s and Brian’s strange appearances … I hated lying to my dad. As far as I knew, he had never lied to anyone a single day in his life. He valued honesty above everything else. He said honesty was a defining quality of character. Lying was low, even for me, and I was ashamed.
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