by Karen Booth
Lily looked up at the ceiling, in utter despair. She loved her job more than anything. Except Noah. She loved him. She knew it. And she definitely loved him more than her job. But what if she ended up losing both of the things she loved? And her nest egg? She couldn’t bear the thought. The tears started to come and they weren’t about to stop anytime soon.
“Mr. Locke.” The security guy with the beard was standing right next to Noah. “Ms. Foster should not be in the office right now. We need to ask her to collect her things and leave.”
Of the many things Lily had worried about, leaving this office she loved so much in utter disgrace was not one of them. “Okay. I’ll go.”
“I’ll help you. And I’ll call my driver and get him to bring the car around to take you back to the Grand Legacy.”
Lily watched as Noah retrieved her bag and coat. She wasn’t even allowed to touch her desk. Sawyer didn’t even say goodbye. He was still holed up in his office. Noah walked her down to the street. It was starting to rain and she had no idea where her umbrella was. Somewhere in a box, back at Noah’s.
He pulled her into a hug while the driver stood, waiting, the car idling. “We’ll figure this out. There has to be some other explanation. I’ll convince Sawyer somehow that he’s wrong.”
“Okay.” She looked up into Noah’s face, making a point of remembering every perfect angle, his amazing lips, his unforgettable eyes. She’d suspected all along that he wasn’t meant for her and right now, it felt like every circumstance in the world was pointing to that very fact. If she wasn’t proven innocent, Sawyer would fire her. He would bring criminal charges. If anything was going to make Christmas morning awkward, it would be spending time with your former boss and boyfriend’s brother, the guy who’d tried to send you to jail.
The words she wanted to say were on her lips, but they would do no one any good now. They would only complicate things, make them worse when they were already impossibly bad. I love you was not going to fix anything today.
“Will I see you at home?” Noah’s question dripped with the same doubt Lily was carrying around in her heart.
“Maybe. We’ll see.”
“Thinking about going to the bookstore? What’s it called?”
“Petticoats and Proposals.”
“Right. How could I forget?” He laughed quietly.
“And it’s only Thursday. I go there on Fridays.” Even the promise of a romance novel couldn’t lift her spirits right now.
Noah pressed another kiss to her forehead. “I’ll see you soon. It’ll be okay. Somehow.”
She nodded, even though she wasn’t sure what she was agreeing to. “Okay.” She climbed into the car and the tears rolled down her cheeks.
“Are we headed to the Grand Legacy, ma’am?”
“For now, yes.”
Thirteen
Noah got home early that night. He couldn’t stand being around Sawyer or the office anymore. “Lily?” he asked. “You home?” He dropped his keys on the foyer table, but the sound echoed through his apartment in a way it never had before. He felt her absence in his bones. Coming home to an apartment that had no Lily was a whole new level of empty. Warmth and happiness were gone, and in their place was the clatter of metal keys on hollow wood. “Lily?” he called one more time, but there was no response. Noah had never felt more alone.
He still refused to believe that Lily had betrayed Sawyer and him. It didn’t seem plausible, but the evidence was damning. After she’d left, he and Sawyer had talked over the timeline and it all made her look that much more guilty. Had she pulled the wool over their eyes? Was there a cold and calculating woman under that guise of perfect employee? She was no ordinary employee, either. She had the paperwork to claim her 3 percent of Locke and Locke forever, which was awfully convenient. The thought of Lily conspiring with their dad, undermining them, sabotaging their hard work was unthinkable, but the evidence was there and Sawyer was pushing him hard to believe every shred of it. Use your brain, Noah. It’s right here in black-and-white. She screwed us over.
This was the price he’d avoided paying for so long. If you don’t get close to people, they can’t hurt you. Noah had never had to worry about money. He’d never had to worry about his career or the roof over his head or whether or not his future was secure. The only thing he’d ever had to worry about was whether anyone would not only love him, but whether they would actually stick around. He was the unlovable one—the guy who only skimmed the surface and was, thus, easy to walk away from. He’d feared that for half of his life and been sure of it for the other. And Lily had only proven his theory. She’d walked away from him today.
He wandered into the kitchen. She’d cleaned up. So much so that it was as if she’d never been there. Her tin of tea bags was gone. The flowers she’d put on the center island were, as well. He opened the refrigerator and everything was neat and tidy, and exactly the way it had been before she moved in. No nonfat yogurt. No bowl of strawberries. Just milk for cereal, orange juice and beer. Bachelor staples. And that was about to be his life again.
He closed the refrigerator door. He couldn’t fathom deriving pleasure from food ever again. Instead, he headed for the home bar, loosened his tie, poured himself a double tequila and downed it. He stared straight up at the ceiling and focused on the burn. It hurt all right. Everything hurt right now and he’d better get used to it. There would be no more covering up pain with meaningless hookups or laughing it off with a joke he’d made one hundred times. He couldn’t live like that anymore. He needed to embrace the pain of his existence, wrap his head around the reality and find a way to get up tomorrow morning, go back to work and hope that he and Sawyer could hold on to the Grand Legacy and keep the Hannafort deal together.
But first, one more drink. The second one burned as badly as the first. So much for numbing himself to anything at all right now. He replaced the stopper on the bottle and shuffled down the hall and straight back to his bedroom. He took one look at the bed and was smacked in the face with a memory he’d been so eager to cling to. Twenty-four measly hours ago, he’d been as happy as he’d ever been. He’d climbed out from under the secret he’d kept for two years, confessed that Lily had always had his number and her reaction had been everything he’d been so terrified to hope for.
Last night put their night at the wedding to shame. It was no longer lust and forbidden fruit—delectable and worth having, but not on a par with what had happened when he’d dared to bare his soul. The things they’d done to each other in that bed, the pleasure they’d given and taken, was unrivaled. He’d planned to hold on to it forever. Now he couldn’t wait to be rid of it, although he couldn’t imagine how he was ever supposed to go about doing that. Lily was seared in his memory. No woman would ever make him feel like that again.
He dropped down to a crouch, buried his head in his hands, then screamed right into his palms. The air tore from his lungs, but he felt no better after he’d done it. If anything, he only craved the release that much more. There was no way he was going to be able to sleep in that bed tonight. He couldn’t sleep in the guest room either. It undoubtedly smelled exactly like Lily. Maybe he should move out of the Grand Legacy. Hell, he’d have no choice if his dad got his hands on the hotel. Maybe he should change his entire existence. Grow a beard and buy a cabin in Maine and spend his days chopping wood for the winter and learning to fish. He would look terrible with a beard. Good. It would keep women away.
Noah straightened and opened his eyes. That was when things got even worse. There on the nightstand was Lily’s engagement ring, resting on top of a note. It felt as if his heart was being ripped from his chest for the third or fourth time since that morning. There’d be nothing left of him when this was over. Forget the beard and the cabin. He’d disappear.
He perched on the edge of the bed, picked up the ring and held it in the palm of his hand. He’d known that day at Tiffany
that what they were doing was wrong, but he’d wanted to do it anyway. Even when he feared it would mess with her head and his. He would’ve done anything to be close to her. What a sap he’d been.
He flipped open the paper and Lily’s sweet voice filled his ears.
Dear Noah,
Despite the deal we made, I can’t keep the ring. It’s too painful to keep. Without you, it means nothing.
For that same reason, I can’t keep my 3 percent of the company. Even though I worked my ass off for that share, I don’t want it if Sawyer doesn’t trust me. I don’t need it if there’s even a chance that you doubt me. It will just be a reminder of everything we had and the way it all went away.
For the record, what we had never felt fake to me. Even when I was keeping my distance. I was only protecting my heart. You were the guy in the ivory tower and I was the girl standing on the ground, peering up at you, desperately hoping you’d take a minute to look at me. And notice. That part had always been important to me. I always wanted you to notice. Even if it was only for a few minutes or days. I guess I got my wish. It’s just that nobody tells you that when you get your wish, you might not get to keep it. That’s a life lesson I’m still not comfortable with. I wish it wasn’t true.
I hope you know with every bone in your body that I would never, ever betray you. After today, it’s pretty clear to me that Sawyer doesn’t know that. I guess I’d allowed myself to believe that I was part of the inner circle, but I never truly was. That’s okay. I understand how strong your bond is with your brother. He’s your rock. I had hoped to be that person in your life, but some things just aren’t meant to be.
Lastly, I want you to know that I harbor no ill will. It’s just not part of who I am. I will never understand vengeance or an anger that never dies. I can only understand loyalty, friendship, love and good intentions. Those are the only things that make any sense to me. I hope you saw that in me, for however long it lasted.
Love,
Lily.
Noah ran his fingers over her name, while visions of her wouldn’t stop playing in his head. How was it that the one time he actually had his act together with a woman, it all had to blow up in his face? It didn’t seem fair, but it did seem like confirmation from the universe that Noah and love were not meant to be. Yes, he’d fallen in love with Lily, but she and her apparent actions were now standing between him and the only other thing he could count on in life—Sawyer.
* * *
Sleep had not come easily that night, especially since Noah had opted for the couch. He tossed and turned, mulling over everything that had happened in the office yesterday. None of it added up. The supposed evidence was too obvious, too easy. Almost like it was being spoon-fed to them by a person with ulterior motives—their father.
But who else had access to Lily’s computer? Nobody other than Noah and Sawyer.
He turned off his alarm before it sounded, got in the shower and then headed to the office. The sun was still coming up when he arrived. He went straight to his old planners, stored in the bottom drawer of a filing cabinet. The one from two years ago prompted a strange feeling when he saw it. The cover was burgundy leather, not his normal black. That year, his favorite color had sold out early and he’d been stuck with one he wasn’t crazy about. But that wasn’t the thing that struck him about it. It was that he had such vivid memories of closing it at the end of every work day that year—the year he started to fall for Lily.
He flipped through the calendar until he got to March. Lily had started on March 12. He would always remember the date. It was the first time he’d laid eyes on her. Sawyer had conducted her only in-person interview. Noah had only spoken to her on the phone. Noah then went back one week to find the name he was looking for—Robert Anderson. His phone number was right beneath it. Robert had been the guy who came in the week before Lily started work to deliver and set up her new computer. Noah and Sawyer had decided that they would use the one week of downtime between administrative assistants to get a few things in line—they bought a new desk, had the reception area painted and even put in all new furniture. But it was the computer that Noah was fixated on.
Noah glanced at the clock. It was only 8:00 a.m. But he decided to try the number anyway. He got voice mail for a nail salon in Queens. He double-checked the number and called again. Same message. Something was definitely up. The realization made the hair on the back of Noah’s neck stand up. Robert Anderson was a mole. Noah knew it with every fiber of his being. He pulled up the website for his dad’s development company and began doing image searches for every one of his father’s employees he could find.
After about an hour, Sawyer came in. “You look like I feel.”
Noah ran his hand through his hair, beyond exhausted. “I feel like hell. I didn’t sleep. At all.”
“The Lily thing really got to you, didn’t it?”
Noah shook his head and got up from his desk. He loved his brother, but damn, he was being dense. “Yes, Sawyer, it did. It bothered me a lot. Do you want to know why? Because I let you mow me down yesterday.”
“I was acting on the facts we had. What else was I supposed to do? Our business is the most important thing we have.”
“No, Sawyer. Kendall and the baby are the most important thing you have. The business is what you do all day. I know it’s your passion, but you have more in your life and I’m tired of believing that only you and Charlotte get to have that. I want it, too.”
Sawyer set his laptop bag down in a chair. “I never said that I didn’t want you to have that. Your track record never suggested anything else.”
Noah was ready to scream again, but that wasn’t going to accomplish anything. “Look. Stop digging up the past. I’m tired of it. The only thing that matters right now is that I don’t believe Lily is capable of the things we have accused her of. She’s our partner, she’s an amazing employee and, most important, she’s the woman I love.”
“Hold on a minute. You love her? Did you two sleep together?”
“It’s more than that. A lot more.”
“You can’t let your libido get between your own brother and the truth.”
“I’m not. I’m going to find the real truth. I have to find a way to fix this.”
The look of pity on Sawyer’s face made Noah want to knock it right off, and Noah had never hit his brother. Not even when they were kids. “You’re wasting your time.”
“Think about it, Sawyer. If Lily was working for Dad, why be such a flawless employee?”
“That put her further into the inner circle.”
Noah hated that his brother had an answer for everything. “I don’t buy it. I also don’t think Dad would’ve kept her on after the Grand Legacy was finally open. He would’ve had her disappear. The hotel is Dad’s real obsession.”
“Okay, then. Prove to me that Lily is innocent.”
“I will. And then I will say I told you so when I’m done.”
Sawyer left and Noah got back to work. After what seemed like hundreds of searches, he finally stumbled across what he was looking for, but Robert Anderson went by an entirely different name—Dan Lewis. The man worked for their father’s IT department out of his main office in New Jersey. Aside from the name change, he was practically hiding in plain sight. Noah printed the page from the website and walked into Sawyer’s office.
“I found the guy who sabotaged Lily’s computer.”
“What? Is that what you think happened?”
Noah explained his theory. Now that he was going through everything a second time, it made perfect sense. “And now I’m going out to Long Island to make things right.”
“If you’re going to talk to Dad, I’ll go with you.”
Sawyer wasn’t going to lead the charge on this one. This was much more about saving Lily than rescuing the business. Only Noah could do that. “I need to do this on my own. I n
eed to end this.”
Sawyer nodded. “Okay. You do what you gotta do.”
Noah grabbed the printout from the website and reached for the door. He turned back to his brother one more time. “Oh, and Sawyer. I told you so.”
In the car on the way out to the Locke estate on Long Island, Noah did the unthinkable. He called Lyle Hannafort and told him everything. It was not a pleasant phone call, but Noah smoothed the ruffled feathers by the end. A man like Lyle Hannafort doesn’t make a deal solely based on a man’s reputation. Plus, Lyle seemed to appreciate that Noah would do anything for his business. In the end, it came down to zeroes and dollar signs. And the promise of an in-person apology to Marcy. That much Noah could do.
When he arrived at the stone-and-iron gate, he got the usual runaround from Tom, the guard stationed at the estate entrance.
“I’m not supposed to let any of you kids onto the property. You know that.”
“Tom, I’m thirty and you’ve known me since I was ten. Maybe longer.”
Tom grudgingly pressed the button opening the gate. “If I lose my job, I’m coming to work for you and your brother.”
“Do it anyway. I promise you’ll be much happier.”
The car started down the crushed stone driveway, along the manicured hedges. The sprawling and stately white house with the black slate roof rose from the stand of trees starting to leaf out. What was it like for other people to return to their childhood home? For Noah and his siblings, the mixed feelings were too numerous to count. There had been more unhappy moments than happy in the house, but this was the only place they had known their mom. As far as Noah was concerned, this house was where love had once had a chance, but was squashed under the weight of their father’s ego. Everyone around him—children, spouse and employees—existed only to serve him. To laud him. To shower him with affection he never deserved.
