“I feel weird walking into a bikers’ clubhouse holding cupcakes,” Xander murmurs, chuckling to himself.
I smirk at him. “Zach has the biggest sweet tooth. Women and chocolate—that’s how you get him.”
A woman walks by wearing, I kid you not, pasties over her nipples and a skirt. I narrow my eyes on Xander to see if he’s staring at her.
“You better not be staring at her tits.”
He puts the trays down on the table and lifts his hands up in the air. “Come on, what do you want me to do? There’re only so many places I can look, and there’re women everywhere. You know I don’t want anyone except you.”
I know it, but I just want to annoy him a little. I didn’t even see him looking at that woman.
Pursing my lips, I arch a brow at him. “Fine, but that means I get to look, too.”
I see Rake walking towards me with a smile on his face. “Trillian without Zach—looks like I got lucky.”
Xander steps next to me and pulls me in by the hips. “She’s mine, so not so lucky.”
Rake crosses his arms over his chest. “This dude? Not even a fuckin’ biker? I’m disappointed in you, Trillian.”
I smile because I can see the playfulness in Rake’s eyes. “He rides a bad ass bike. He’s just not in your MC.”
The two of them start talking about bikes until Arrow walks up to us.
“Trillian,” he says with a chin lift.
“Hey, Arrow,” I say. “This is Xander.”
“Trillian’s taken,” Rake says, sounding upset.
Arrow grunts. “I’m sure you’ll find someone else to keep you occupied. We gotta go. Sin needs us.”
Then they’re off. Rake blows me a kiss as they depart.
“Want to tell me how you know bikers from other chapters?” he asks, frowning a little.
“Bikers seem to like me,” I tease, batting my eyelashes at him.
He studies me for a moment before he lifts me in the air over his shoulder. A squeak escapes my lips as he slaps me on the ass and carries me outside where everyone is sitting and drinking.
“Put me down, Xander!” I laugh, pinching his tight ass.
He puts me down and takes a seat, pulling me onto his lap. “You don’t want to look at anyone else, Trillian. All you can see is me.”
Cocky bastard, but he’s right.
Zach walks over and plops down in the chair next to ours. “Is April coming?”
I glance at him in suspicion. “Why?”
He shrugs, running his hands through his hair. “Just asking, Trillian.”
“Is something going on between the two of you?” I blurt out. “Both of you are staying close-lipped about it.”
A blonde sits down on Zach’s lap and he points to her. “Does this look like something is going on between April and me?”
I grit my teeth. “You can be an asshole sometimes, Zach. You better not hurt April or I will personally kick your ass.”
He sighs. “We hooked up, but we aren’t together, all right? It was a one-time thing.”
There is obviously more to the story, but I’m not going to pry. Whatever they’re going through, I’ll be there if one of them wants to talk about it. If not, then I’ll try to mind my own business.
“Enjoy your birthday,” I tell him. “You seem agitated. Just how much have you had to drink?”
He cups the blonde’s breasts. “I am a little agitated. I know exactly what will take the edge off.”
“Pig,” I mutter.
“Let him be,” Xander says in my ear. “He’ll figure things out.”
I turn my body so I can look at his face. “You seem sure about that.”
“Xander knows me well,” Zach says, chuckling. “We do everything together, you know. Or at least we used to.”
“Zach,” Xander snaps, glaring daggers at him.
“What exactly does that mean? It’s not like I’ve stolen him. You guys still see each other,” I say, thinking that Zach must be angry that Xander spends most of his time with me.
Zach groans. “So innocent, Trill. I meant that if you weren’t here right now, Xander and I would be taking this sexy woman on my lap upstairs. Together.”
“That’s enough, Zach,” Xander growls, standing up but not letting go of me. His fingers tighten on my waist.
Wait, what?
They’ve shared women before?
What the hell?
I try to push off Xander’s hold on me, but it doesn’t work. He just grips tighter. “It’s in the past, Trill, let it go.”
Let it go?
Let it go?
This isn’t a fucking Disney movie.
He finally lets me go and I storm off. I hear Zach mutter a curse and I turn my head just in time to see Xander punch Zach in the gut, the blonde forgotten and standing in the corner.
Looks like Zach isn’t having the best of birthdays.
I make it to the front, but then realise that Xander rode us here on his bike.
“You okay?” Rex asks, jogging over to me.
“I want to go home.”
“I’ll take you,” he offers.
I know Xander will be angry, but right now, I don’t care, I just want to leave.
I eye him warily. “You haven’t been drinking?”
He shakes his head. “I just got here. I was at work. Come on.”
I follow him to his bike and let him take me home.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Xander
I punch Zach in the stomach, losing my temper. What the fuck is wrong with him? Why would he say something like that to Trillian?
“Fuck, I’m sorry,” he grits out, holding his stomach. I look around to see one of his club brothers walking over to us, probably wondering why I’m hitting him on his birthday. In front of his club. Yeah, not the smartest thing I’ve ever done, but it looks like only one of them saw what happened anyway.
“Zach?” The man comes up, looking to Zach for instruction, probably on whether to kick my ass or not. Well, he can try.
Zach holds his hand up. “It’s fine. I deserved that.” He stands up and nods. “We better find her. I shouldn’t have taken my shit out on her. I’m sorry. Fuck, I keep messing shit up.”
“What’s going on with you?” I ask, walking with him. “Fuck, do you have any idea how much shit you just put me in?”
He cringes because he knows it’s bad. He knows Trillian. We were in such a good place. I don’t need her head filled with insecurities because she has absolutely nothing to worry about with me.
“I fucked up, Xander. I’m sorry. Let me talk to her.”
“Fuck, no,” I snap. “I’m going to have to talk to her and explain that, yeah, when we were younger we did some shit, but I didn’t even know her then so she can’t exactly hold it against me. The worst thing I did was not tell her about it, but how do you start that conversation? Oh, did you know that Zach and I have had threesomes before?”
Zach makes a strangled sound. “Fuck, fuck, fuck. I wouldn’t call it a threesome. It’s not like we touched each other. We just shared a chick.”
He shrugs, like it’s no big deal.
“Zach, do me a favour and shut the fuck up. Trillian is going to think up all this shit in her head now,” I say. “And she’s going to trust me less.”
We stand in the driveway just in time to see her leave on the back of Rex’s bike.
“Motherfucker!” I yell, seeing red.
What is she thinking? Getting on the back of Rex’s bike? She knows I don’t like him. And this is the first time she’s been on someone else’s bike. I don’t like it one bit. She’s mine and she should know better.
Zach scowls. “He should know better. Everyone knows not to go near Trillian.”
Yeah, that’s true, but no one can say no to her.
“I’ll see you later,” I tell Zach, walking to my bike.
“I’m coming.”
“You’re drunk, you can’t ride.”
He s
ighs. “Fine, but I’m fuckin’ sorry, all right. Today’s been a shit day. No excuse, though.”
I ignore him and straddle my bike.
I need to go get my woman.
*****
Rex’s bike is nowhere in sight when I pull up in Trill’s driveway. Maybe the man is smarter than he looks. Pulling out my key, I unlock the door and storm inside. I find her sitting in front of the TV. She doesn’t look at me even though she has to have heard me enter.
“Will you listen to what I have to say?” I ask gently.
“Do you know what it feels like to find out something from other people that you should have heard from your boyfriend in the first place?” she fires back.
“That isn’t really something I wanted to share with anyone.”
Especially with her.
“Zach is one of my best friends, even though he was a dick tonight, and you and he have slept with the same women before? At the same time? Do you know how awkward that is?”
I sit down next to her but don’t touch her yet. “Baby, it’s not a recent thing. We were young, horny, and stupid. I hadn’t even met you then. How can you hold it against me?”
She stares down at her hands. “When was the last time?”
I rack my brain. “I think we were twenty. So a few years now.”
“I just feel like… What if you want to do something like that again? What if I can’t keep your interest? You have all this sexual experience and I have hardly any. I don’t want you to get bored,” she admits in a small voice.
I lift her face so she has to look at me. “It didn’t mean anything. I love you. I wouldn’t change you for anything. Do you understand me? If I wanted that, I could have it, but I don’t. We were young and experimenting. I know I should have told you, but to be honest, I didn’t want to scare you off, and it’s not something I just go around sharing. We haven’t spoken in detail about my sexual past and I thought that maybe you didn’t want to know.”
She cringes. “I don’t want to know details or anything. But if we run into someone you’ve been with, I’d like to know that.”
I tilt my head to the side. “Okay, that I can do. You can ask me anything you want, Trillian. I’ve never lied to you.”
“I know you’ve been around,” she adds, sniffling, “so it’s hard to believe sometimes that you’re willing to settle down with me and be with only me.”
I lower my head to taste her sweet lips. “I want you. Only you. I’m fuckin’ obsessed with you, Trillian. We just are, you know? You’re the one for me. Stop questioning it, baby. I love you.”
“I love you, too,” she whispers, her body relaxing. She leans her head on my shoulder, and I exhale slowly in relief.
“I just can’t get the image out of my head,” she whispers. “I know it’s stupid.”
“What you feel isn’t stupid, Trill. It never is, not to me. I know I’d hate it if our places were reversed. The only thing I can say is that nothing that happened before matters anymore. This right here is what I want, and you are who I was meant to be with.”
She flashes me a small smile. “So you don’t want to share me with anyone else?”
“Even the thought of it makes me want to kill someone. If there’s something you wanted to do or try, I will do it for you, but I’d never want to share you. Ever. I don’t think I’d handle it very well.”
“Understatement,” she mumbles.
I kiss her temple. “You’re mine and mine only. I’m greedy when it comes to you.”
“Well, I’m glad,” she replies in a dry tone, “because if Zach put his penis near me, I’d probably scream.”
She’s only joking, but the thought of Zach or anyone near her, makes me extremely angry.
“It’s just you and me, Trill,” I say, trying to calm myself. “We don’t need anyone else or anything else to get us by.”
“Just… I don’t want to hear anything else from someone else. I’d like it to come from you, okay? When someone else tells me things, it makes me feel like I don’t know you.”
I’ve really fucked up.
“Okay, I promise,” I tell her, meaning every word. “I’d never do anything to mess this up. I might be a dick sometimes, but I’d never cheat on you, or look elsewhere. Why would I? I’m not stupid or blind. I know the value of what I have in my arms.”
“Xander—”
“Next time you get pissed, you don’t fuckin’ run away, Trill. Getting on Rex’s bike? I didn’t like that.”
In fact, I hated it. I didn’t trust that fucker, and I didn’t like her being on his bike, especially because I know he wants her. I also wanted to make sure she was safe.
“I know,” she says. “I’m sorry. I just wanted to leave.”
I nod. “We’re still learning about each other every day. We’ll get there. We’re going to make mistakes, but at the end of the day, we’ll come together, just like this. But you need to talk to me. Don’t run from me. I want you too fuckin’ badly to ever let you go.”
She giggles. “You’re so smooth.”
Liking the sound of her happy giggles, I push her back on the couch. “Smooth? Hmmmm. With you, it’s just me being honest.”
“And with the other women?” she asks, wrinkling her cute nose.
My mouth twitches. “Yeah, okay. I can be pretty smooth.”
She bursts out laughing and I just watch her.
I could watch her all day.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Trillian
One Month Later
Leaving straight from uni, I meet April at a café.
“How was class?” she asks.
I shrug. “Same old crap. You?”
She shrugs. “Same.”
We share a grin.
Xander is back in Perth and has been for the last week.
It sucks.
It sounds like a first world problem, but it really sucks. I miss him and want him back here. I miss him making me laugh, us sharing meals together, hugs.
The sex.
I so miss the sex.
But even more than that, I just miss him.
His presence. His warmth.
“Did you hear what I just said?” April asks, pursing her lips and staring me down.
I clear my throat. “I’m sorry, what?”
She sighs. “I just admitted that I slept with Zach and you weren’t even listening.”
I may have not been listening before, but I am now.
“I knew it!” I call out, standing up and clapping.
She grips my arm, trying not to laugh. “Sit down. People are staring at us.”
I sit down.
“So what’s the problem?” I ask, sipping on my milkshake.
She leans her chin on her elbow.
“He’s a manwhore. It was just a one-time thing….” She trails off, wincing. “That happened once before when I was like eighteen.”
My jaw drops. “Why am I only hearing about this now?”
She groans, covering her face with her hands. “He’s your neighbour and friend. It was awkward.”
“So you slept with him again? When?” I ask, frowning a little.
“The day before his birthday,” she says. “He came into the bar and… shit might have happened.”
So that’s why he was in a shitty mood on his birthday? Something isn’t adding up here.
“Are you sure it was a one-off thing?” I ask, trying to figure these two out.
She nods, playing with hair. “Yeah. He’s amazing in bed, like wow.”
Probably all the practice he’s had over the years.
“So what now, then?” I ask, tilting my head to the side.
“Now, nothing,” she replies nonchalantly. “We pretend it never happened.”
I expel a sigh. “I don’t get the two of you.”
She picks up a forgotten fry on her plate and pops it into her mouth, chewing thoughtfully. “When does Xander get back?”
“Next week,” I reply, allo
wing her to change the subject.
“You must be bored without him,” she says. “You two are practically married.”
“Are not.”
“Are too.”
“I do miss him,” I admit. “The house is dead without him. I’ve gotten used to having him there and he kind of spoils me and I only realise now just how much.”
April scoffs. “Brat.”
I smile at her. “Are you finished eating?”
She throws her napkin down on her plate. “Yes, let’s go shopping. I’m going to do some damage today.”
We both stand and walk to my car. “Do you actually need anything?”
She glances at me, her blue eyes sparkling. “What kind of question is that? I need everything. New jeans, new shoes…”
I shake my head at her. “Let me guess. You’re going to try everything on and take three hours in each store.”
I never try anything on. I just buy it. I don’t have the patience. April is the opposite. She’ll spend all day in a store and enjoy every second. She’ll also ask my opinion on every item she tries on. I usually make sure to bring snacks in my handbag to keep me occupied.
We get into the car and sing along to the songs playing on the radio. It feels good to be spending time with April. Really good.
But I also miss Xander.
A lot.
*****
“Wooo!” I yell, poking Zach in the chest. “I beat you again! How does it feel to lose to a woman?”
Zach shakes his head at my antics. “And such a good sport you are.”
We’re playing pool at the clubhouse. He apologized to me about what happened on his birthday. I know he was in a bad mood and it is really unlike him to take it out on me. He’s never been anything but kind to me. Of course, I forgave him. He’s like my brother. I’ll always forgive him.
“I think this is the only thing I can beat you at, so yes, I’m going to milk it for all it’s worth,” I say, chalking up my pool cue.
A woman walks over and presses herself against him.
“I’m busy,” he tells the woman, then looks at me. “Let’s play again. If I win, you have to bake me whatever I want.”
I see Grim walking over to us. When he reaches us, he leans down and kisses me on the forehead. “How’s my girl, Trill?”
Time Will Tell Page 13
