by Donna Alward
Sam’s eyes lit up and he practically bounced on his toes. “Mom? Can I?”
Emily’s dark eyes were centered on him again and he felt the same tightening as he had yesterday when he’d held her body against his. Lord, she’d been sweet and soft and when he’d kissed her every single thought in his brain had gone on vacation.
“You don’t have to do that, Luke. You’re busy. Sam can wait for another time.”
Sam’s shoulders slumped in disappointment and he scuffed a toe in the dirt, the action reminiscent of his mother. Clearly Sam had wanted to go, and it was no big deal having him on the tractor with him. Hadn’t the boy suffered enough disappointments lately? Luke looked at Emily, knowing she was acutely unhappy with the path her life had taken. He knew she was trying to do her best, but that cloud of unhappiness affected Sam, too. She couldn’t keep him tied to her apron strings forever.
“It’s just a tractor ride,” he answered. “I’m going to be sitting there anyway, raking what we cut yesterday. The boys will be coming along behind, doing the baling. No reason why he shouldn’t come along. It’ll be a chance for him to learn something new. And give you a little time to yourself.”
“Please, Mom?”
She paused.
“He’ll be safe with me, Emily. I promise. You have to let go some time.”
Her gaze snapped to his and her lips thinned but he held his ground. Sam was a boy. He needed freedom to play and see and do things. Luke understood Emily being protective, but an afternoon in the sun would be good for him. Luke was not her ex. If he made a promise he’d keep it. “It’s only a tractor ride,” he repeated.
Emily paused, taken aback by Luke’s words. Was she over-protective? She didn’t think so. She was only focused on Sam feeling loved and secure. His expressive eyes had looked so hurt, so broken since his father left and she’d do anything to keep that from happening again. She didn’t want Sam to get any hopes up.
But perhaps Luke was right. It was just a tractor ride, after all. Didn’t Sam deserve some fun? “I’ll think about it over lunch.” She put off a firm decision, needing him to see that she wasn’t going to accept being nudged or coerced. He should have done the courtesy of asking her in private. Heavens, he’d barely said two words to Sam the first few days and now here they were, seemingly thick as thieves.
“Lunch is ready, by the way. I made chicken salad this morning and a cobbler out of that rhubarb your sister sent.”
He sent her a cheeky smile from beneath his hat. “You might have to stop treating me so well. I’ll get round and fat.” He stuck out his stomach and Sam giggled.
Emily pressed her lips together. The man was exasperating! It was almost as if he and Sam were in cahoots together. Which was probably preferable to his taciturn moodiness the first few days, but she didn’t want Sam to get too attached. He could get a good case of hero worship without much trouble. And this job wasn’t permanent.
Sam bounded on ahead to wash up and Emily took off her cap and shook out her hair. She looked straight ahead as she asked, “You might have asked me first, rather than putting me on the spot.”
“What? Oh, I didn’t think you’d mind. He did mention something about the tractor the other day, didn’t he?”
“That’s not the point.”
His steps halted, churning up a puff of dust. “Look, I know you’re worried about him and it’s something he might find fun. I don’t get your problem.”
She angled him a look that said Get real. “My problem is, he’s had too many promises made to him that have been broken. Have you seen how he looks at you? Like you hung the moon and the stars. He’s been missing a father figure and suddenly here you are.”
Luke laughed. “I doubt it. He snuck out of bed the other night and told me off for not complimenting you on your veal.”
Emily’s mouth dropped open. “He what?”
“Came to the shop and told me you were a nice lady and that his dad doesn’t like him and he doesn’t care whether I do either. Now, normally a five-year-old boy’s opinion wouldn’t bother me, but it occurred to me that perhaps I hadn’t been as welcoming as I might have been. Don’t read too much into it. Like I said, it’s just a tractor ride.”
Emily folded her hands together. “I guess I can’t blame him for being protective. His trust has been shaken.”
“Just his?” he asked quietly, walking along beside her again. “Are you really planning never to trust anyone again?”
How could he blame her for being a little gun-shy? “Let’s just say trust is a valuable commodity and it has to be earned.”
“Yes, and your ex is a prime example of earning it and then abusing it. There’s more to building trust than time.”
His words cut her deeply. She had trusted Rob and he’d ground her faith in him beneath his heel when he left. She’d made a lot of progress since then. She’d stopped blaming herself for everything. She’d stopped feeling so desperate. She’d started focusing on the good—as much as that was possible. But trust…that was something she wasn’t sure she’d ever quite accomplish again.
“If you’re so smart, what else is there?” She didn’t bother to keep the annoyance out of her voice. Sometimes Luke was far too sure of himself. Like he had her all figured out.
“Actions. Hell, instincts, if it comes to that.”
His observations made her uncomfortable, because her instincts had told her from the beginning that Luke was a man she could trust. And he’d kept his word about everything since her arrival.
“Right now I don’t put a lot of credence in my instincts.”
He stopped, his boots halting in the dusty drive and she kept on a few steps until she realized he wasn’t with her anymore. She looked over her shoulder at him. His eyes flashed at her. “And I’ve done something to…not earn your trust? Is that it?”
He had her there. And yesterday’s kiss…she couldn’t blame him for that either. She’d wanted it as much as he had. Not that they’d talk about it. No way.
“I’m cautious, then,” she responded, as they reached the steps. “Very, very cautious.”
“So can Sam come with me or not?”
She left him in the doorway taking off his boots. “I’m still thinking,” she said. She’d already made up her mind that Sam could go, but she wasn’t going to let Luke think he’d won so easily.
Just as they were finishing the meal, a cloud of dust announced an approaching car. They both looked out the window and Emily heard Luke’s heavy sigh. “Who is it?”
“My sister, Liz.”
“The rhubarb sister.”
He smiled at her summary. “Yes, that’s the one.” Emily watched as he checked his watch and tapped his foot. “Dammit, she’s got perfect timing,” he muttered.
Liz parked the car in the shade of a tree and Emily felt the strange, nervous feeling she’d had yesterday meeting Joe. As though she was an imposter, a tag-along.
“I’m sorry, Emily. I think the family is curious about you, and you’ve been put under the microscope.”
“Why would they do that?”
Luke plopped his hat on his head. “Because you’re not the matronly housekeeper they expected. Because you’re staying here. Because you’re young and pretty.” He sighed. “Because people who are married think that everyone else in the world should be married, and they feel free to stick their noses in.”
Emily opened her mouth and then closed it again, unsure of how she was supposed to react to that little tidbit. It wasn’t the meddling that shook her—she half expected that. It was the young and pretty part. She was only twenty-eight but there were days she felt ancient. And pretty…she’d been living in T-shirts and yoga pants for so long that she forgot what it was like to feel pretty.
She wouldn’t dream of admitting such a thing to Luke, though. Surely his family wasn’t putting the cart this much before the horse. “Married?” The thought was preposterous, and she laughed. Even if she did want to get married—which she did
n’t—she’d only known Luke for a few days.
He raised his right eyebrow until it nearly disappeared beneath his hat. “Ridiculous, isn’t it? But I’ll bet my boots Liz is here to check you out. She’ll have some good excuse. But don’t worry, she means well. This should be the end of it. You can thank the Lord that I don’t have more sisters to interfere.”
With that he went outside to greet Liz.
Liz came towards the house, carrying a blond-headed baby on her hip and with two more youngsters trailing behind. Emily bit down on her lip. She was an object of curiosity now. Yesterday’s longing for siblings and a close-knit family dissipated as she realized that intimacy also meant interference. The last thing she wanted was to be scrutinized. Judged. And to come up short.
“What brings you out, Liz?” Emily heard him call out and closed her eyes. She could do this. Liz would never know how Luke’s voice gave her goose bumps or how they’d kissed until they were both out of breath. Emily fluffed her hair, smoothed her fingertips over her cheeks, and let out a calming breath.
Luke met his sister in the yard. The twin girls took off running across the lawn, burning off some stuck-in-the-car energy.
“Strawberries,” Emily heard the woman say. “I brought out a flat of strawberries.”
“I’m in the middle of haying. When would I have time for strawberries?”
They’d reached the porch and Emily stood just inside the screen door of the house, wanting to scuttle away but knowing how that would look—as though she was running from something. Hiding. She had nothing to hide.
“Joe told us you’ve finally got some help. It’s about time, Luke. Joe said she’s very pretty, too. You’ve been holding out on us, brother.”
“No big surprise, Nosy Nellie. Cait put the request in at the agency, after all. You can’t fool me.”
Emily’s cheeks flamed as Liz looked up and suddenly realized Emily was standing behind the screen door. For a second, Liz got a goofy look on her face as she realized she’d been caught. Then she replaced the look with a wide smile.
“Joe was right. You are pretty. I’m Liz, Luke’s sister.”
Good heavens, was everyone in Luke’s family so forthright?
“Berries are in the trunk, Luke. Be a good brother.”
Luke’s jaw tightened as Liz smiled and adjusted the weight of the baby on her hip. Emily looked to him for guidance, but he gave none. Emily couldn’t stand to be impolite, so she opened the door. “Come on in. We were just having lunch. Come have some cobbler.”
Liz swept in and Emily heard Luke’s boots tromp off down the steps. First Joe and now Liz. The family obviously thought there was more to the arrangement than a simple trading of services. Which there wasn’t. Much. Emily wondered how fast the telephone wires would burn up if Liz knew that they’d kissed yesterday.
“Don’t mind Luke,” Liz admonished, nosing around the kitchen. “He’s always a bear in haying season. No time to call his own, you know? Not the biggest conversationalist either.”
Emily was tempted to set Liz straight on that. Last night and just a few moments ago Luke had managed to hold his own quite well in the conversation department. She wondered how he managed that. He seemed to say a lot, but none of it really told her anything. Except that he’d been left in charge of the family at a young age.
But she did not want to open that can of worms with Luke’s sister. She wasn’t a busybody and knew exactly how awful it was to have people pry into her situation. She would keep the conversation impersonal. “Rain’s coming, Luke said.”
Great job, Em, she thought. First words she spoke and she was parroting the forecast? Perhaps she could have come up with something slightly more inspired.
Liz nodded. “He’ll work until dark tonight, I expect. Good to get the first cut in though. What do you think of the house?”
Emily busied herself fixing a bowl of cobbler and ice cream for Liz. “It’s charming. Much nicer than the cookie cutter houses in the city.”
Liz nodded. She sat at the table and perched the baby on her knee, bouncing her a little and making the little girl giggle. “I think so, too. Luke’s done some work to it since taking it over, but for the most part it looks just like it did when we were growing up. Of course, I’m living in town now. And I’ve got the little ones to keep me busy.”
Luke came back in, carrying a wooden flat filled with boxes of crimson strawberries. “I think the twins have made a new friend,” he said dryly.
Emily and Liz went to the window. Sam and Liz’s blond girls were racing through the yard, playing what appeared to be a rousing game of tag.
“It’s good for Sam. He hasn’t spent much time with friends since…”
She stopped. Since the divorce. Since there was no longer any money for playgroups and preschool.
“He’ll have to come play with the twins while you’re here. It’ll get them out of my hair,” Liz offered freely.
Another tie to break later? Emily wasn’t sure it was a good idea. But then she balanced it against Sam being alone here in an unfamiliar place and no children to play with. “That might be nice.”
“Call anytime.” Liz replied, putting the baby down on the floor. The little girl rocked back and forth for a minute before setting off at a steady crawl. “You and Luke could come over for dinner.”
“Liz,” Luke warned, and Emily had to look away. It was such an overt bit of matchmaking that she squirmed in her chair.
“What? Look, both Cait and I are thrilled you have some help at last. That’s all. And Emily doesn’t know a soul besides you. And we all know what great company you are.”
He raised an eyebrow at her.
“I’m heading back out. The boys are going to wonder where I am. Emily, tell Sam I’ll take him out with me another time. He should enjoy the girls while they’re here.” He put his plate in the dishwasher and cut himself a massive slice of apple cake. “For the road,” he said, flashing a quick grin.
She nodded and walked with him to the door.
“Are you sure you’re okay with my sister?” he asked quietly, pausing and resting his palm against the frame.
Emily forced a small laugh. “You have work to do. I’ll be fine.”
“She’s meddling. Thinking that this is more than it is.”
That should have relieved her but didn’t. Would it be so awful for them to think that he liked her, for heaven’s sake? Not that she wanted him to, but was it incomprehensible that he might? “Don’t worry about it. And it’s good for Sam to have playmates for an hour or so. He’s been lonely.” She paused. “Are you really going to work until dark?”
His gaze plumbed hers for a long moment. It was a simple question but brought with it a picture of how the evening would unfold…Sam in bed, darkness falling, Luke coming to the house in the twilight. All of it played out in her mind as she gazed up into his eyes. How did he feel about coming home to her at night? Was she an intrusion? A complication? Or welcome company, as he was to her, despite his sometimes prickly ways?
“Probably close to it,” he finally answered. “We’ll go until it starts to cool off, then there are chores here to see to. You and Sam should eat without me. Just fix me a plate.”
There wasn’t any reason for her to feel disappointed, but she did. After only a few days she’d gotten used to seeing him during meals. Company, whereas before mealtime had meant an empty space at the head of the table.
“I’d like to make a run into town for sugar and pectin. Anything you need?”
He shook his head. “Not that I can think of. Thanks for asking, though.” He started off but turned around again. “Don’t let Liz needle you into anything,” he warned. “Cait’s the bossy sister, but Liz has a way of getting what she wants without you even knowing how.”
CHAPTER SEVEN
AS EMILY WENT back inside, three sweaty heads ran past her into the house.
“Whoa, slow down!” Liz called from the kitchen, laughing as the children scrambl
ed in demanding a snack. The baby was heading for the stairs, and, without a second thought Emily picked her up, breathing in the scent of baby powder and milk. She closed her eyes for a moment, enjoying the feel of the weight on her arm, the smell that was distinctly baby. Sam had left those baby days behind him long ago. Emily had always hoped the time would be right to have another, but it had never worked out. Now she was a little glad it hadn’t. She couldn’t imagine being responsible for two precious lives in her current circumstances. Knowing she would probably never have any more caused a bittersweet pang in her heart. Being a single mom was tough. She knew she wouldn’t deliberately grow her family without being in a secure relationship. And after the crumbling of her marriage, she never intended to go down that road again. Still, it was hard to say goodbye to those dreams.
As she opened her eyes, blue eyes reminiscent of Luke’s stared up at her and she smiled. “Let’s find your mama,” she murmured, and settling the baby on her hip, she entered the kitchen to find Liz mixing up lemonade and three expectant faces watching.
Liz looked so comfortable that it reminded Emily that this was Liz’s childhood home. Emily was the trespasser here and she felt it acutely as she watched Liz add sugar to the lemonade then open the correct drawer for a wooden spoon. Emily envied the other woman her level of comfort with, well, everything. And yet she had to admit she was drawn to Liz’s breezy ways.
“Out on the porch with you three,” Liz admonished, filling three plastic cups with the drink. “One cookie each. No sneaking.”
When the kids were settled on the verandah she came back to the kitchen. “Thanks for grabbing Alyssa,” she said, taking the bundle from Emily’s arms. “The stairs, right? It’s always the stairs.”
Emily couldn’t help but laugh. Liz might be a bulldozer but she was a pleasant one, and it had been a long time since Emily’d had a mom-to-mom visit with anyone. She’d been too busy coping to realize she was lonely.
Compared to Luke’s reticence, Liz was bubbly and open. “How is it you are so different from your brother?”
