Defector

by Susanne Winnacker

  I shrugged. I didn’t trust my voice to answer.

  “I’m not surprised Major doesn’t trust you. Not with your background. Too much has happened between Major and your father.”

  “So it’s personal?”

  “Major’s too professional to get emotional. But Abel and his brother are a different story.”

  “Why didn’t Major force you to join the FEA when he took me with him? He knew you were a Variant, and he could have thrown you into prison if you’d refused.”

  “He could have,” my mother said quietly. “But he and I go way back. Maybe that was one of the rare instances when he didn’t follow the rules. And he knew I was a mess. I’d have brought trouble with me, and that was the last thing Major needed in headquarters.”

  I gasped. “Don’t tell me that . . . you and Major?” I couldn’t even say the words.

  “It was a long time ago,” she explained. “When I joined the FEA back in the seventies, Major was a good-looking young man.”

  My face must have shown my shock, because she lowered her eyes. “It sounds strange, I know. But I was drawn to his seriousness. He was very intense. He was so much older inside than his age suggested, but things didn’t go well for long. Maybe I was too erratic. And when your father joined the FEA years later, I fell in love with him. I don’t think Antonio ever forgave me for that.” I wasn’t sure if she realized that that was the first time she’d used Major’s real name. “Maybe that was why he didn’t want me anywhere near the FEA when he found you and me. It reminded him of what happened back then.”

  It was too much to take in, and it didn’t really matter. I had to find Holly. That was all that mattered now. “I need to find Abel’s Army,” I said.

  My mother gave a small shake of her head. “You don’t have to look far. If you stay in one place for very long, they’re liable to come find you. But you don’t know what you’re getting yourself into, Tessa. Change your appearance, go to Europe or somewhere else, and live a normal life. Enjoy yourself. Live by your own rules. I think you could do it. You are stronger than I ever was. You are your father’s daughter.”

  “But Abel’s Army kidnapped my best friend. I have to find her.”

  My mother didn’t seem surprised. “They won’t hurt your friend. He wants you, Tessa. I don’t think he ever forgave me for taking you away from him.”

  “Are you still in contact with Abel? I heard a rumor that you are.”

  Her eyes grew wide. “Maybe someone in the bar has been spreading rumors.”

  “Mom,” I said firmly, drawing her eyes back to me, “are you? Do you know where Abel’s Army is located?”

  “I saw your father once, a few weeks ago. When he contacted me, I just had to meet him. I knew you were safe, so why not?” She sighed. “He was still everything I remembered. Charismatic, strong, charming. Smart. We talked about you. He’d found out that you were a Variant, that you were with the FEA. He was angry with me. He couldn’t believe I’d handed you over to them. He’ll never forgive me for that.”

  “But where is his headquarters?”

  “I don’t know. That’s restricted information, and he didn’t tell me. We met in a small restaurant outside of Vegas.”

  “Did he tell you anything that will help me find him?”

  She laughed mirthlessly. “No. But some of the customers talk. There are always rumors about Abel’s Army and the FEA making the rounds. I’m not sure how much of it is true. I never really bothered to find out.”

  I wondered how she could be like that, how she could so easily turn her back on her past and everyone in it. “Then why did you wind up here? If you were so desperate to be normal, why did you get into a relationship with another Variant? You gave me up to have a chance at a normal life.” I didn’t bother to hide the bitterness that I felt.

  Hopelessness blanketed her expression. “It seems normal is out of my reach. You can’t help who you are. No matter where you go, no matter how fast you run, Tessa, you can’t escape yourself.” She sniffed.

  She pressed her fingertips against her temple. Exhaustion marked her face. She probably needed some rest after her drug haze. I perched on the bed beside her and took her hands in mine. Her eyes widened, but she didn’t pull back. Maybe she didn’t have the energy to do so, but I tried to tell myself that she stayed because she enjoyed my closeness. “Please. If you know about any way I can find Abel, you have to help me. I need to find my friend.”

  Her eyes became distant. “Abel’s Army can’t be found; they find you. That’s what people say, and it’s true. Abel found me, and he will find you too. If you let him. I think he’s met his match in you.” She paused. “But it’s possible that Stanley knows something. He hates talking about it, but he belonged to them once. To Abel’s Army.” She started to get up, but her legs shook and she sank back down. I walked to the door and found Stanley in the corridor, arguing with Penny. Devon spotted me and immediately came over and touched my arm. I wanted to press myself against his chest, but I knew this wasn’t the time or place. “You okay?” he asked.

  I gave him a small smile. “I’m fine. My mother doesn’t know where Abel’s Army is, but she thinks that maybe Stanley does.”

  Devon looked doubtful. “I don’t think he’d tell us even if he knew.” Especially after I’d threatened to call Abel on him earlier.

  “Stanley,” I yelled out. “I need to talk to you.”

  His narrowed yellow eyes cut to me. He said something to Penny, and she disappeared down the stairs. Stanley strode toward me, a reddish-blue bruise marking the spot on his chin where my fist had struck him. If I’d known I needed him, I wouldn’t have hit him, but it was too late for that. My eyes darted to my mother, collapsed into herself on the bed.

  “You still here? I don’t want you under my roof,” Stanley growled. Like he hadn’t known that I’d been helping my mother all this time.

  “I don’t want to cause any more trouble,” I said. “As soon as you tell me what I need to know, I’m gone. And you’ll never see me again.” I retreated into the room. That was a promise I wasn’t sure I could keep, and he probably knew it. I couldn’t leave my mother in this place, but I couldn’t exactly take her with me either. I had to save Holly first, but then who knew if I’d be back.

  He followed me into the room, scanning my mother without a single emotion on his face. “What do you want?” Devon trailed after us, his eyes never leaving Stanley.

  “You have to tell me how to find Abel’s headquarters.”

  His mouth twitched, and then booming laughter burst out of him. My hands curled into fists at my side, but I let him have his moment. Devon glanced at me, his eyebrows raised.

  “You want me to help you find Abel?”

  “Yes. I won’t leave otherwise.”

  His eyes hardened. “Oh yes you will.”

  Devon took a threatening step toward Stanley. “Listen, you’ll have far less trouble if you just tell us what you know.”

  The man jabbed a finger at Devon. “You know nothing about trouble, boy. That girl of yours is getting you into a shitload of it. Better run while you still can.”

  “Just tell us!” I shouted.

  His small eyes twinkled angrily. “If you want to meet up with your daddy, you’ll have to let him catch you. There is no other way.”

  Maybe I should just let him catch me, I thought. The odds of us finding Holly without being captured were incredibly slim. My mother had made him sound okay, and the photo of him holding me showed a softer side too. But he was still an unknown entity: He had kidnapped Holly, and I didn’t know what his plans were for me. I had to try to get Holly to safety, and then I could decide if I wanted to risk a meeting with my father. “That’s not going to work. He won’t let me leave once he has me. I need to get inside their headquarters without their knowledge.”

  “Didn’t you listen? Y
ou can’t find them. Very few people know where they’re located. They have their ways of making sure that no one can reveal it.”

  “You mean their Variant who can alter memories? Do they make sure that no one can remember where they are?”

  He stared at me for a moment. “Not as clueless as you pretend to be, eh?”

  We were getting nowhere with this. Devon ran an impatient hand through his hair. “This is all bullshit. Can you help us or not?”

  I gave him a warning look. “Tell us what you know. My mother said you knew something.”

  Stanley glowered at her, but she had curled up sideways on the bed, and her eyes were now closed. “Your mother doesn’t know what she’s saying. But I’ll give you some advice: Get the hell away from here, and stop looking for Abel. If you’re not willing to be part of his army, you shouldn’t get near them. They won’t leave you with any other choice.”

  The door was ripped open, and Penny stumbled inside, eyes widened in panic. “They’re here!”

  Stanley went very still.

  “Who?” I whispered, fear slicing through me. Devon stepped up beside me, and I slipped my hand into his.

  “Abel’s Army. One of their cars just pulled up in front of the bar. Benny is sure it’s them. They’re just waiting. They haven’t gotten out yet.”

  “They won’t wait for long,” Stanley said.

  My eyes flew to Devon. He let go of my hand and hurried toward the window to peek through the gap in the curtains. I pressed myself against his back and peered down into the lot. A black limousine sat right below the window, its engine running.

  I whirled around. “Did you call them?” I demanded, narrowing my eyes at Stanley.

  He glowered back. “Do you think I’m desperate for trouble? Someone must have recognized you in the bar. With those eyes of yours, it’s no surprise.” He released a harsh breath. “I told you to leave. You should have listened!”

  “What do we do now?” Devon asked softly. I glanced at my mother, still passed out on the bed, then at Devon. There was no other way. If I let them capture me, they would leave Devon and my mother alone. They would take me to Holly.

  I looked at my mother and then back at Devon. “Hide her or get her away from here,” I told him.

  “No, I won’t let you go alone.”

  “It’s the only way.”

  “What? Letting yourself get captured? Tessa, you’ve got to be kidding!” he said desperately. “You don’t know what you’re getting yourself into. You’ll both be prisoners. How is that going to help Holly?”

  I knew he was right. “Is there only one car out there?” I asked.

  Penny shrugged. “It’s the only car we can see. That doesn’t mean there aren’t more hiding out of sight.”

  I touched my mother’s shoulder, but she didn’t react. She must have spent all her energy talking to me. Now her body needed time to recover from the spittle and the antidote. I couldn’t just leave her here. But I knew she couldn’t come with me. “I’ll keep her hidden,” Penny said suddenly. Stanley, who had been staring into nothing, snapped his head around. But Penny glared at him. “We owe it to her, Dad.” Then she turned to Devon and me. “You should really leave now.”

  I pressed a brief kiss against the top of my mother’s head, then followed Stanley into the corridor and down the stairs. Patches of sweat had spread under his arms. “There’s a tunnel in the basement that leads to another bar. I have something of an agreement with the owner, so he doesn’t care who enters or leaves.”

  I knew he wasn’t doing this for our sake. He just wanted to get rid of us as fast as possible and without causing a big stir. But Stanley froze the moment we reached the bar area. He stopped so short that Devon and I almost ran into his back.

  “What’s—” I never finished my question, because a boy with eyes like mine had just entered the bar. He was unmistakable, even after all these years. My brother, Zach.

  CHAPTER 28

  He was tall and slender, with the same auburn hair and turquoise eyes as me. His skin was milky, but not quite as pale as mine. He wore black from head to toe, right down to his sneakers. Two men entered the bar after him, also dressed in black. But they hovered somewhere behind Zach, so I couldn’t make out their faces or see if they were armed. I’d have to be careful. Slowly Zach scanned the room, his face like steel, until he found me. Devon grabbed my hand in a painful grip and tugged. But as my eyes locked with my brother’s, I couldn’t move. His face softened, and something stirred in me. I had a brother. He really existed. He gazed at me with warm eyes. It reminded me of the expression I’d seen in the photos and in the recent memory.

  “Damn,” Stanley muttered.

  Zach’s lips pulled into a tentative smile, as if he was happy to see me. But my face was frozen, unsure of how to feel. He was part of Abel’s Army. Maybe he was responsible for Holly’s kidnapping. The softness of his expression made me want to believe otherwise, but I knew better than to trust someone’s face. One of his men—I recognized him as the guy with the red hair who had disappeared with Holly—said something, and every hint of happiness slipped off Zach’s face. His eyes cut through the room, and my heart stopped as I followed his gaze toward a booth at the end of the bar. Tanner and Kate were slowly rising from the blue leather seats.

  Where was Alec?

  Bitter realization set in. After what I’d said to him in Detroit, he was done with me. The FEA still wanted to rescue me, but not Alec. He no longer cared what happened to me.

  The other customers started to whisper nervously, and most of them got up and moved closer to the only exit, which Zach and his men were still blocking. Where were Benny and Finja? Was there no other form of security?

  “This is all your fault,” Stanley said miserably. His hands hit my back, and I stumbled into the middle of the room. “Here, take her. She’s why you’re here. Take her and leave.”

  I caught my fall with my hands and slowly straightened. Stanley and Devon were fighting. Punches were flying, and Devon was trying to get the older man in a headlock. Stanley was spitting, probably to put Devon in a drug haze. But that wasn’t my main problem. Devon was a good fighter. And it was better for him to be part of a brawl with Stanley than to get into whatever was about to go down between Kate and Tanner and Zach and his men. I could only hope that Penny would stay with my mother upstairs. My eyes darted between my brother and my former agent colleagues. Whatever I did, escape was unlikely. One of them would inevitably triumph.

  Maybe the FEA was the lesser evil or maybe not. After everything I’d learned, I couldn’t be sure anymore. Abel’s Army was the great unknown. Could what awaited me with them possibly be worse than being thrown into the FEA’s loony bin and having my life controlled by Major? The unknown held the potential for danger, but it also held hope. And my brother was my ticket to Holly.

  Tanner held out his hand. Today his mohawk was blue. Good old Tanner—but his face was missing his trademark grin. “Come on, Tessa. We can get you home safely. This can all be over now.”

  “What home?” I retorted bitterly.

  “Home is the FEA, where you belong. Major wants you back. Alec is waiting for you,” Tanner said, his eyes flitting between me and Zach, on the other end of the room.

  “Major just wants to control me. And if there were a chance for Alec and me, he’d be here with you. Don’t start lying to me too, Tanner.” I really wished Benny hadn’t taken my gun when we’d entered the bar. Even when it came to fighting Variants, I’d have felt much safer with it in my hand.

  “We’re your family,” Tanner said. Kate rolled her eyes, and I almost wanted to do the same. Strangely enough, she was the one person in the FEA I resented the least right now. Without her, I’d still be clueless. She had set this whole thing in motion, but at least she had told me the truth.

  “A family doesn’t do what the FEA did to me,” I
said quietly. And yet part of me still wanted my old life back at headquarters, that feeling of belonging, of having a place where I was safe. I longed for my life the way it used to be: movie nights with Alec, banter with Tanner, laughter with Holly, and breakfast with Martha cooking in the kitchen. Maybe I could have forgiven everything if Major had apologized, if he hadn’t planned on locking me away, but even then, broken trust was hard to mend. Especially if there was a lack of trust on both sides. As Abel’s daughter, Major would never trust me completely.

  Everyone in the room had fallen silent. The tension was so thick I could almost reach out and touch it.

  Zach’s eyes focused on me with strange intensity. “You have a real family, Tessa. You don’t need them.” He nodded toward Tanner and Kate, resentment hardening his eyes.

  I turned to him. “You only want me because of my Variation. When you thought I was normal, you didn’t even come looking for me.”

  Zach took a step toward me, and Tanner and Kate tensed. “That’s not true,” Zach said. “We didn’t have the same resources we have now. Dad never stopped searching for you.”

  I wanted to believe him, and maybe it was true. My mother had said that Abel would never forgive her for taking me away. What if that meant he really cared for me? Devon appeared at my side, hair rumpled but otherwise uninjured. When our eyes met, it took him a second to focus. “Did Stanley hit you?” I asked.

  Devon shook his head and blinked once, hard. “No, the bastard just spit on me. His spittle is strong stuff.”

  “But you’re okay?” I whispered, never taking my eyes off Zach and Tanner, who had both taken a few steps toward me. Stanley had disappeared.

  “I’m fine. My Variation can take care of the stuff.” Devon’s gaze settled on Tanner. They had joked around a lot in the time they’d spent at headquarters together, and now they were facing off like enemies.

  “Why should I believe you?” I asked, turning my attention back to Zach. He opened his arms in a disarming gesture. “Blood’s the strongest bond in this world. You should be with the people who love you for being a sister and a daughter and not for the value of your Variation.” He sent a brief glare toward Kate and Tanner.