"Do you think he's been captured, too? I grow tired of all of these rescue missions."
Alec chuckled.
"No, Father, I do not believe he has been captured. The French captain said he fled with a rather remarkable lady."
"I have heard Lady Cavanaugh called many things, but remarkable has never been one of them," Richard said.
Alec helped himself to some toast. Thinking he may not get a chance to be alone with his father in the near future if they were all to be soon aboard a vessel bound for Liverpool, Alec quickly changed the subject.
"Father, can you tell me about my mother? Can you tell me about Emily?"
Richard's face was blank. Alec could not see a single emotion come across it.
"What has brought this on?" Richard finally said, leaning back in his chair, his face contracting into a look of concern, an emotion that Alec could see clearly and feel just as clearly.
"It was just-"
He didn't know what he had planned to say, but sitting there, staring at his father, all of the thoughts in his head simply vanished.
"I didn't mean to kill her," he finally said, and the words shocked even him as they sounded harsh and bald in the silence of the room.
"What makes you think you killed her?" his father asked, his tone impassive.
"It's my fault she's dead. If she hadn't given birth to me-"
"She would have died just as easily by the common sniffles."
Alec stopped talking, his tongue growing large in his mouth. He swallowed.
"I beg your pardon?"
Richard took a sip of his tea and set his cup down in its saucer.
"Emily Higgins was a frail girl. I can remember how small her wrists were. Reminded me over much of a bird, and I thought any single pebble from a careless child's slingshot could fell her. But she surprised both of us when she gave birth to you."
Alec shook his head.
"I don't understand. Mother was frail?"
Richard nodded.
"Very. When I married her, my mother was concerned she'd never be able to carry a child to term, but it was difficult, you see. With Nathan. A woman was not going to accept her husband's mistakes so easily. But Emily did. Emily never treated Nathan any differently. To her, he was just a child, a child deserving of her love. And so I married her, and we hoped for the best. She became pregnant almost immediately. The doctor ordered bed rest by her fifth month. She took it very seriously. She used to sing to you, you know."
Richard took another sip of tea while Alec stared at him. His mother sang to him in the womb?
"It's one of the memories of her that I cherish from the short time I had with her. She sang beautifully. It was almost haunting. Nathan would often sneak out of the nursery and into her rooms just to listen. She would let him stay, of course, and that's how I would find the three of you. Emily holding you with a hand to her belly, Nathan asleep at her side."
Alec saw it in his mind, his mother, full with pregnancy, and a sleeping young Nathan at her side.
"What happened?" Alec asked, not surprise by the strain in his voice.
"It came time for you to be born, and she became ill. The doctor called it toxemia. We were prepared for it, and Emily had made me swear when we first learned she was with child that no matter what happened, we would save the baby first. Your mother loved you, Alec, even though she had never met you."
Alec absorbed the statement like balm. The words like medicine coated him, and he felt a deep ache that he had carried with him for as long as he could remember begin to heal.
"She wanted to save me?" Alec asked.
"Of course," Richard said, pressing his fingertips together and apart in his lap, "There was to be no question of it. When the doctor realized her blood was full of toxins, he had to decide if he would allow the birth to continue as it would or if he would try to hasten delivery, which surely would have killed your mother but would most likely have saved you. Emily told him to hasten the delivery."
The words hit Alec with the force of Sarah's right cross. It had him sitting up in his chair, his breakfast forgotten.
"She told him to hasten the delivery?"
Richard nodded.
"Yes, Alec. It was your mother's decision to put herself into peril if it meant saving you. And she chose to save you."
Alec could not find anything to say. Years of guilt weighing down his shoulders suddenly lifted, and air rushed into his lungs with speed and alacrity. But following the rush of air came the quick feeling of an all-encompassing love, something much greater than that which even his father had given to him as a child and still did. This was the insurmountable love of a mother protecting her child, and his mother had shown him that love in the greatest way possible.
"I didn't kill her," he finally whispered, but the words held no meaning for him. The agony he had carried was gone, and in its place, love reigned, radiating a warmth and joy he had never felt before in his life.
Richard shook his head.
"You did not kill her, son. She loved you, and she gave her life for you. I will love her until the day I die for that, because I could not have asked for a better son and heir."
Alec stared at his father.
"What do you mean?" he asked.
Richard laughed.
"What is it that you don't understand, Alec?" he said, his laugh still lingering in his voice. "You have made me so proud, and I am honored that you will take the title of the Duke of Lofton one day. Your mother would be proud of you as well. And if the rumor is true that you have worked out that nonsense with Sarah, she would be even more proud. There isn't a woman around who can match Sarah for her intelligence and strength. It's a fine lady you've wed, Alec, and it would suit you to keep her happy."
"I plan to do so, Father," he said, feeling a smile return to his face. He picked up his fork again, having remembered his breakfast. "Are you certain I am fit for the title? You do have another son, you know."
Richard rolled his eyes, picking up the forgotten Times.
"One that gives me constant reasons to worry for his well being."
"Why do I sense that statement is about me?"
Alec turned toward the door as Nathan entered, his greatcoat swinging as he moved. Alec gestured toward the spread.
"You'd better eat up. I'm starving, and I do not promise to save you any."
He had carried the guilt of his mother's death for the whole of his life, and in a single instant, the weight had vanished. Alec felt light and free and hopeful. He felt hopeful about the future. About his life. About his life with Sarah. About everything.
Nathan shed his greatcoat, taking a place at the table.
"Do I dare ask where the ladies are?"
"Only if I may ask how it is that you find yourself married, brother," Alec said, forking some kippers into his mouth. "Because last I checked, you were most certainly a bachelor." Here he turned to his father. "And who's idea was it to send Samuel to Great Aunt Lydia? The child's going to return with all kinds of ideas."
"I always take the opportunity to blame Jane when I can, so I will do so now," Richard said from behind his paper.
And his sons only smiled.
"What did you learn of Thatcher?" Alec said, reaching to refill his tea.
Nathan spoke around a mouthful of egg.
"Unfortunately, not good news. It appears Thatcher and the good Lady Cavanaugh boarded a ship last night."
Richard set down his paper.
"A ship? But wherever were they going?"
Nathan shrugged and swallowed.
"I believe they were attempting pursuit of the gold toothed fiend."
Alec laughed.
"Is that what you are calling him?"
"Does he have a name?" Richard countered.
Alec nodded.
"Sven. At least, that was the name he gave us."
Richard looked to Nathan, but Nathan shook his head.
"The only intelligence on the subject is that his na
me is Loyal Bentons."
Alec laughed.
"Well, that is what I would call ironic."
Richard frowned.
"It sounds like a hired job."
Alec nodded in agreement.
"I would have to support that conclusion. It sounded as if he was being paid a handsome sum of money to bring my person to Dover. I don't think he would be the type to do anything out of loyalty to a cause despite his name."
"Do we know which ship they boarded and where that ship was bound?" Richard asked, but Nathan was already shaking his head.
"My contact couldn't be sure which ship they ended up on. They are either on their way to the Americas or..." his voice trailed off.
Richard and Alec both looked at him.
"Or they are headed to Italy," he finally finished.
"Italy?" Richard and Alec said at the same time.
"God help us all," Richard muttered.
"Isn't Napoleon's brother-in-law or some sort still in charge of Italy?" Alec asked, looking to his father.
Richard shrugged.
"As far as I know they allowed him to return."
"Italy would not be the best choice of destinations then," Alec said. "But perhaps the Americas. Are those American chaps still trying to take Canada?"
Nathan shook his head.
"No, I think they're done going on about that."
Alec shook his head.
"I don't see what they're all about. They already took the Colonies. Why is that they feel they must own everything?"
"Said the British gentleman," Nathan added, and Alec laughed.
Richard made a noise of agreement and went back to his paper.
"So, Nathan, tell me. How are you finding the married life?"
~
Nora stood behind her as she plaited her hair into a tight braid that she would then loop into a circle at the base of Sarah's neck. It was lucky for both she and Lady Lofton that Nora had paid attention when the lady's maids of the various houses she had been employed in had carried on when it came to styling said mistress's hair. Otherwise, this ruse of servants accompanying their masters on a wedding trip would never have passed the first whisper of suspicion.
Sarah kept still while Nora worked the last of the plait.
"I still don't understand how the men with the gold teeth work into this entire ordeal."
"Man. There was only one gentleman with gold teeth," Sarah corrected Jane, who lounged on the settee by the window of Sarah and Alec's room in the suite at The Owl and Fork Inn.
"And gold teeth? How gaudy," Jane said with enough emphasis that no one could mistake her opinion on the subject.
Sarah watched Nora in the mirror of the dressing table as the braid she had been working on went into place. The style was unlike any Sarah had worn before, but it was quite suitable for traveling and just a touch stylish. She would appear proper and well kept but not so posh as to attract unwanted attention. It seemed the infallible Miss Quinton, or Mrs. Black as it were, had quite the natural flair for espionage.
"How long will Samuel be staying with Great Aunt Lydia? I did not get the chance to truly meet the lad, and I would very much like to do so," Sarah said as she met Nora's eyes in the mirror and watched the other's woman's face melt into a smile.
"I daresay we could send for him once we make port in Liverpool. York isn't much farther north. You and Nathan can go fetch him before returning to London if you wish, or perhaps Lydia feels like a visit to town," Jane said.
Sarah made a face, and she watched Nora's barely controlled laugh in the reflection of the mirror.
"I do hope for everyone's sake, Great Aunt Lydia does not feel like a visit to town. We will surely all be in for it then."
"With all of this unsavory talk on the subject of Great Aunt Lydia, I worry about what my son may be like when next I see him," Nora said.
Jane waved this concern away with the flick of her wrist.
"Nonsense, my dear. Nathan and Alec practically grew up at Lydia's and look how they turned out."
"I think that's Nora's concern exactly, Jane," Sarah said just as Nora placed the last pin into her hair.
Nora stepped back and surveyed the work as Sarah continued to watch her in the mirror. There was something not quite right about Nora this morning. The housekeeper was just the slightest touch not herself. It was not as if Sarah could say what it was. It was more of just a feeling she had. Sarah obligingly turned her head this way and that to survey the up do herself.
"If you are ever thinking of entering a different profession, Mrs. Black, I could always use a fine lady's maid."
Nora smiled.
"A different profession? The last I checked I quit my employ rather abruptly a short time ago. Perhaps you could offer me a profession in the first place."
Sarah shook her head.
"Certainly not, Nora. I am speaking of your career as a spy. You're quite good at it."
Now Nora blushed, and Sarah smiled at the woman's reaction. It wasn't long ago that Nora would not have given a reaction at all, stoic to the last with her housekeeper's training ever in place. But now Nora smiled and blushed and even laughed. Sarah was so happy Nathan had found her. Or perhaps it was the other way around.
And looking back in the mirror at herself, Sarah could say she was glad she had found Alec and that he had found her. For too long misunderstood words had kept them separated, but now, she knew it would be different. Now she knew, Alec would never be far from her again. With or without words. And with even greater certainty, she knew he would never leave her.
"What time does the ship leave port?" Sarah asked as she stood, shaking out the skirts of her day gown.
It felt good to be clean and in whole clothes again with petticoats and shifts and tapes and buttons and slippers. She felt complete and normal again and relished the feeling of hair pins against her scalp. Now a hat and reticule would complete the ensemble just nicely, and she could return to being the Countess of Stryden. Only this time, she swore to truly make it her own, and when people said my lady, she would turn her head with the greatest degree of arrogance she could fathom.
"This afternoon, I believe," Jane said, also standing. "But I'm almost certain Richard will want to get there early."
It sounded as though Jane had meant to say more, but her words ended abruptly. Sarah looked up at the older woman only to find her staring at a spot over her shoulder. Sarah turned to where Nora stood a little ways from them in the room.
Nora stood perfectly still, one thin hand pressed to her stomach, her face completely white. And before Sarah could ask if everything were all right, Nora was already headed to the chamberpot and had commenced being sick into it. Sarah and Jane moved together, one grabbing the chamberpot for Nora while the other held the thin woman's shaking shoulders. It was Jane, ever the mother, who spoke first.
"There you go, dear, have it all up. It will do no good to keep it in your stomach."
When it appeared that she had finished, Sarah set down the chamberpot and scurried out of the room in search of something for the poor woman to drink to rid her mouth of the acrid taste of her own stomach contents. She flew into the main room of the suite, completely stalling the conversation that had been occurring at the breakfast table at the far end of the room. The men began to stand at her entrance, but she shooed them back in their seats even as she snatched the tea pot and a cup from the table.
"No, no, nothing amiss here," she said although no one had asked her a single question.
She moved as quickly as the tea pot would allow her, returning to her room and snapping the door closed on the men gathered outside. She poured Nora a cup of tea and brought it to where Jane had made her recline on the settee.
"How long have you felt ill?" Jane asked, and Nora shook her head.
"Oh, it's nothing really. I am sure my stomach is just upset with all the travel. I will be fine as soon as we return to Liverpool."
The statement seemed out of place comin
g from the stalwart housekeeper, and Sarah poked her.
"That's not true, is it? You're carrying a child."
Sarah didn't know where the thought had come from but suddenly it was there, fully formed in her head, and there was nothing she could do for it except to say it out loud.
Jane gasped at the pronouncement, but Nora merely smiled.
"I haven't told Nathan yet. I was only truly sure of it this morning when I woke up feeling this way. It's been like this for the past few days, and I just wanted to be sure before I said something to him."
Sarah's face hurt with the smile that had found its way to her lips.
"Oh, Nora, how exciting! Perhaps I could knit little booties for the tyke."
Where on earth that statement had come from, Sarah had no clue, but Jane looked at her oddly.
"You do not know how to knit and since when are you concerned about little booties?"
Sarah's hand went instinctually to her stomach. Jane did not miss the motion.
"Oh, that is how it is then, I see." She stood, heading toward the door. "Both of my sons have finally decided to give me grandbabies, and they decide to try for it at the same time. I am going to be covered in nappies before long."
And with this statement, Jane left the room.
"Are you hoping for a girl, then?" Sarah asked as soon as the door shut.
Nora smiled, and Sarah went on.
"You could name her Jane or Lydia. Either would be a most daring choice."
But Nora only smiled more and said, "I was thinking about Sarah for a name."
~
Alec stood on the steps of The Owl and Fork Inn with his wife by his side as the Duke of Lofton's carriage approached. The driver would take them to the docks and then depart for London with the duke's carriage while the traveling party proceeded to Liverpool and hopefully, loose any contingent that was still attempting to find them.
He watched the sea breeze play with the tendrils of his wife's hair that hung below her hat and marveled at the normalcy of it. He was just a man standing on the steps of an inn with his wife awaiting a carriage. It was something any gentleman would have taken for granted, but for Alec, it was something he was sure to cherish forever.
Sarah had been quiet since he had left her that morning with Nora. He had told her of what he had learned after speaking with his father, but she had not much to comment on it. She had smiled, of course, and exclaimed her surprise and astonishment at what his mother had done for him. But it was as if she had known his mother would have done such a thing.
For Love of the Earl Page 19
