“YOU ARE MINE.”
She forced him to look at her. Then she gave him another kiss to share her love. When she set him free, he stepped back to put space between them.
“That makes me uncomfortable.”
That surprised her.
“Okay, then I won’t do it again. I didn’t mean to make you feel that way. I was just showing you love.”
He realized how she took it.
“Wait! I didn’t mean the affection. I don’t want you to get sick. I’m a walking death sentence.”
“I can’t get HIV from a kiss, holding your hand, or sleeping beside you. You’re safe. You’ve always been the safe place I could hide, Chris, and you still are. Let me be the safe place for you.”
His heart ached.
“I can’t do this without you.”
She knew the truth.
“You never will have to do it without me. I’m your ride or die bitch. Move over. You have company on this journey until the end. I promise.”
He held her hand.
“I love you.”
“Oh, Christopher. I love you too. We will be okay. This will be nothing. We’re all going to die.”
“Me sooner rather than later.”
She stopped him.
“Listen up. We will get you on a drug trial, we will get you taking yoga, or drinking algae if that works. Let’s not quit. I still have thirty more years with my best friend, brother, and a man I fell in love with and cherished for so many years. Don’t rob me of those thirty years. I earned them. You earned them too.”
He leaned on her as she helped him back into bed.
“Finish your soup. I’ll make you some tea. We have to keep you hydrated.”
“Are you going to do this every day?” he asked, as she tucked him back into bed.
“Is it annoying?” she asked.
“No, it’s nice.”
“Well, then, yes, I am. We are always together, and we live together. This is nothing. I’ll police your dietary habits and make sure you’re healthy.”
She headed away from him.
“Elizabeth?”
“She stopped at the door.
“Yes?”
“That note.”
“Yes?”
“I meant every word. You will always be the one, and I won’t ever love anyone like I loved you. You were the woman I was supposed to be with until my dying day.”
She smiled at him.
“Christopher, our journey isn’t over. It’s only just begun. Again. It’s a new adventure. We write the rules of this game, and I am in for the long haul.”
He believed her.
There was one thing he could always bank on when the going got tough in life.
It was her.
It was Elizabeth.
Her word was gold, and if she said it, you could take it to the bank.
She was sterling.
“Finish your soup, and then get some rest. I’ll get you some herbal tea.”
When she headed out, he closed his eyes and prayed for a miracle.
Despite what she’d offered, Chris knew the odds were not in his favor.
He needed a miracle.
Desperately.
Chapter Four
Thursday Late
Afternoon
W hen they finished up the work at the Hoover building, Ethan and Callen had to work on something far more personal. They’d received a message from their wife, and she was asking for their help.
So, like any decent husband, they had her back.
There was no way they were going to leave her alone to carry the weight of Chris’s diagnosis.
Heading toward Chris’s home, they carried the bag of food that they’d picked up from the restaurant she’d already ordered. They also grabbed a few things she’d need for breakfast the next day for Chris. Elizabeth had explained that he needed a special diet, and the doctors were likely going to make sure he was on it.
So, they got a jump on it.
If anything, Elizabeth was hell on details, and this would be nothing different.
They could already tell.
They hoped the man was ready for it.
At the door, they turned the knob and knew where they’d be. Chris was in bed, and their wife was likely with him. The downstairs floor was void of anyone.
Placing their go bags there, they were going to be bunking there tonight, and any other night if the need should arise. They had no doubt that she wouldn’t be leaving the man behind.
In fact, they would bet on it.
At that moment, security was outside, and they’d make sure they were safe. Tommy, one of Ethan’s other security guys, was in the back, and Ivan was on watch duty from their ride.
They were good to go for now.
When the men swapped out, they’d let him know who was watching their backs.
“Well, home temporary home,” Callen stated, kicking off his boots in the entryway.
“Yeah, it looks like it,” Ethan admitted. “I can work from Chris’s office later,” Ethan stated. “I have an early meeting. I’m going to video link from here.”
“Okay.”
His brother didn’t sound right. Ethan would know that tone anywhere.
Callen was a little too quiet.
“What’s going on?” he asked.
“I’m feeling a little discombobulated about this whole thing.”
Blackhawk lifted a brow.
That was a new one.
“About him being sick?” he asked, trying to clarify what had Callen worked up.
Normally, the man was pretty damn calm.
Callen lowered his voice and hoped his brother wouldn’t think he was an asshole.
“Can I be honest with no repercussions?” he whispered. “I really need to get this off my chest.”
Yeah, that didn’t sound good.
“Sure, you can.”
“Sometimes, their closeness…it bothers me, and I can’t help but get irritated.”
Ethan listened.
“Sometimes, I want to get angry because I feel like he came first and now he’s going to need her for the rest of his life.”
Ethan still said nothing.
“I feel like a horrible person, but many times I wish that he’d find a woman and move out. I thought it. I was so freaking selfish about it. I’m a horrible person, and I know it. I can’t even look at him because I feel like an asshole. That’s not me. I’m not that man.”
He was aware.
Ethan patted him on the back.
“I’ve been there, bro. When you came into our relationship, I was not comfortable all the time. I worried I’d be pushed out too.”
Callen had been down that road too.
It was ironic.
He’d been Chris at one time. He’d been that man who needed Elizabeth.
Why was he being a dick about it?
Why did he want to rage around?
“I feel horrible.”
“Chris wouldn't hold that against you. Now we have to readjust our family, Callen. Before, it was her and I, and then you were added. Did it make it better or worse?” he asked.
“It made it so much better for me. And you?”
“I get to be in a relationship with two people I love, trust, and would die for before ever letting them hurt. It made my life even better, more vibrant, and a lot more special. I have something unique.”
“I feel the same.”
“Will it really hurt us to let Chris be part of that? I mean, the media already says we have some kinky foursome going on. People already think she’s had an affair with him, and that now we’re boning him too. Why not let them talk, and instead of making it about sex, we make it about love?”
The idea of Elizabeth having sex with him…
It freaked him out.
“It can’t be about sex. I won’t share her. I’m sorry, but I can’t do it. Add in that HIV…”
He stopped him.
“Relax. You
’re going red.”
He wasn’t trying to, but he was not sharing his wife’s body with anyone but Ethan.
No.
Just.
No.
“You can chill. That will happen over my dead body,” Ethan stated. “I’m not willing to share her sexually, but I am willing to share her heart with Chris and Bethe. You have to decide if you can do that too.”
“I want to. I just fear losing her.”
“And that’s why you have a wedding coming up and a honeymoon next month. You’re going to bind her to your heart and soul—even though she already is part of you.”
“Please tell me I’m not a horrible person.”
“You’re a human with legitimate feelings. I personally have my own.”
“And they are?” he asked, as they got the takeout onto plates.
“I love him like a brother. The more I see him, talk to him, or do things with him, the more I stop seeing him as anyone but a Blackhawk. He’s part of us, and I accept him.”
Callen felt that way too.
It had always only been them.
Ethan and Callen—brothers.
Now they had Timothy Junior and Chris. Did blood make TJ more of a brother than a man who would always have their back and delivered their woman into their lives?
“I’ll protect him, but I won’t do the share her body thing ever. I’m sorry, but we have to draw that line.”
“Has Chris ever asked for that?”
He didn’t hesitate.
“No.”
“I think it’s pretty clear to him that he’s done with that mission in life. I have a feeling, for now, it’s going to be about keeping him alive, healthy, and here for Bethe. Can you support him through that and help fight for that?”
That was easy.
“I’m in for that.”
Ethan figured as much.
“Let’s go have dinner because tomorrow the shit storm will be hitting the shore. We’re all going to be buried. You two solving, and me trying to keep this from blowing up in our faces. Aren’t I lucky?”
Callen wouldn’t trade him in a million years. Ethan had the far more difficult job.
As they carried the trays upstairs, they found Elizabeth in bed, a notepad on her one leg, Chris sound asleep with his head on her chest.
“How is he?” Ethan asked, moving closer and keeping his voice down.
“Is this Ethan my husband or our boss?” she inquired, knowing this could be bad.
“Your husband and his brother.”
She relaxed.
“On the dresser is a note he left me. I found him drunk and with his gun.”
Callen blinked.
That changed everything.
“He was going to…?” Callen asked.
She nodded.
“Jesus!” Ethan said, sighing. It was a good thing she asked her first question. As his boss…he would have to pull him. As his family, he’d cover for him if his wife thought he was stable enough to keep working.
This was NOT what he needed at that point.
Elizabeth knew what he was thinking.
Ethan, to her, was easily read.
“He’s okay now, but he needs us. He needs his family. I’m going to ask something so huge of you both, and I only hope you don’t hate me for it.”
And they knew what was coming.
To love Elizabeth was to know that she had a huge heart and loved to a level they’d both never seen before.
She was about to mother hen him to death.
“Before you have to ask, Ethan and I have already decided,” Callen stated, taking the note from his brother.
She relaxed.
Elizabeth knew she could trust them to have her and Chris during this time in his life.
Callen took the moment to read the note.
It was heartbreaking, and honestly, he knew exactly how Chris was feeling. Twice in his life, he’d hit rock bottom. Both times, he wanted to die.
Once was after a particularly bad rape by his mother’s druggie boyfriend and the other time when his own blood told him to die.
He understood better now.
“I need you to help me keep him alive, healthy, and with us. I can’t lose him. You both are the most important men in my life. I live and breathe for each of you. He’s part of this. He’s part of me. I need you to help me. Please help me keep him alive. I can’t say goodbye to him.”
Callen wiped his eyes after reading the note.
“I’ve been there,” he said. “I’ve lived what he was feeling.”
Yeah, sadly, and he hated to admit it, but there was a time when he’d wanted to die.
She’d saved him too.
Ethan had to lay down the law.
“He’s ours, but there will never be sex.”
She stared at him like he’d lost his damn mind over the whole thing.
“That you think I’m even thinking about that right…”
He stopped her.
“Elizabeth, we’ve stood by you through thick and thin—and we always will, but we aren’t comfortable with that. First, you’re ours. That act of intimacy is ours and ours alone. Secondly, he’s sick. We can’t risk that.”
Clearly, she had to lay down the law.
“You don’t own me.”
They both laughed.
She hushed them.
“For the record, I wasn’t planning on ever having sex with him. If he needs a safe place,” she whispered, “all I wanted was you to protect him from the storm. He needs a family, and all I wanted was for you to be his brothers. Rally around him and keep him safe.”
He touched her cheek.
The tears in her eyes made him hurt for her.
“Always, baby. I can promise that I will always make sure our brother is safe. He’s a Blackhawk now. He’s all of ours.”
She touched his hand, grateful that she had him in her life. Elizabeth desperately needed them.
“Thank you for that, Ethan. I needed that.”
She glanced over at Callen.
“And you?”
“I’ll protect him and help him fight. Just tell me what you need me to do.”
Before she could say anything, Chris stirred. His eyes flickered open, and he tried to move away from her, and she didn’t let him go.
She refused.
“Hey, sleepy, how’s the hangover?” she asked.
“I hate vodka.”
“Said everyone at least once in their lives,” Callen teased. “A Blackhawk says it more frequently. With Ethan and myself, we said it once a week when we were teenagers.”
Blackhawk laughed. “Timothy made us go to school with hangovers. He was sadistic.”
They tried to joke, but the other man wasn’t feeling it. It was clearly written on his face. He was waiting for the backlash of what he’d done. After all, Ethan was his boss.
“I’m sorry,” Chris said, his eyes filling with tears. “I’m sorry that I...”
Ethan stopped him.
Loving someone meant they didn’t have to say sorry when they felt one way or another.
You accepted them.
“We love you. You aren’t alone—despite how empty you feel right now. We’re going to fill you back up. You’re ours,” he stated, carrying a tray to Chris.
He placed it on his lap and then kissed him on the top of the head.
“You’re my brother. I love you as much as I love Callen. Blood isn’t the only bond. Sometimes, people come into your life and impact it on such deep levels. You are that person, Chris. I fully accept that you’re my brother.”
Tears dripped from Chris’s eyes.
Callen gave Elizabeth her tray next, and then he leaned across her to give Chris a kiss on the cheek.
“We got you. Blackhawks don’t quit. We fight. Don’t make us kick your ass to make you suit up for this battle.”
“I’m going to die,” he stated.
Chris didn’t understand why they weren’t seeing that. Wha
t was it that he was missing?
“We all are, and we have a problem,” Ethan stated, knowing if they could make him focus on work, Chris would work his way through it.
Still, he was going to keep an eye on the man. The boss in him had to do it.
“What’s the problem?” Chris asked, almost afraid to know. With his day, he could only imagine what Ethan was about to say.
“O’Banion isn’t dead, and he’s been in DC all this time.”
Chris looked panicked.
Those words terrified him—not because he’d once wanted him hurt and dead to get to Elizabeth, but because he knew what would happen if he got her.
“Jesus! He’s going to want her. He lusted after Elizabeth for that entire case.”
They told him about the twist in it.
“Wait! You have to protect him?” he asked.
Ethan nodded.
“Well, that’s a twist I never saw coming. Today is a fucked-up day.”
Yeah, yeah, it was.
Ethan continued, knowing it was working. Chris was focused.
“We believe Carl is going to try to get him and end his life. We can’t let that happen.”
“Uh, why not?” he asked. “It would solve a whole lot of problems if he did.”
Ethan told him about what the FBI had done—what Gabe had done to save Elizabeth.
“I’m not sorry he did it,” Chris admitted.
“Us either, but now if he gets killed…the truth will come out. So, we’ve been placed in the situation where we have to protect the bad guy against a monster he made.”
Chris didn’t understand why they were telling him all of this. He’d resigned.
“Why are you telling me? I can’t help. I’m no longer a Fed. I had to give up my job. I’m sick. Elizabeth told me you were willing to quit, but you can’t. You have to do this.”
“We did quit, and our resignations were not accepted.”
Ethan pulled Chris’s badge out of his pocket along with the lanyard with his ID for the lab.
“Your resignation was declined, too, Doctor. You are back on duty tomorrow. We will accommodate for the doctor appointments you need to have, and we will cover for you with other MEs if need be, but you are not permitted to quit.”
Elizabeth smiled.
“Told you that if you went, we all did. Gabe couldn’t afford to lose us all.”
“I do believe it was me telling him I would take that CIA job that did it,” Ethan said, pulling off his suit jacket and kicking off his shoes. It appeared they were eating in bed.
Dead are Forgotten Page 17
