by Leigh Bale
Zoë bit her bottom lip and tried not to laugh, hoping Jonah behaved. “I guess we’ll have to rename them the Trouble Twins.”
“That’s a good name for our boys. I keep trying to remember they’ll grow up to be fine, upstanding men one day. But in the meantime...” Debbie shifted the heavy weight of her book bag, ignoring the impatient tug of her toddler on her hand. “Hey, you play the piano, don’t you, Zoë?”
Zoë bent down and picked up the baby, trying to help ease Debbie’s load just a bit. “Yes, although I’m sadly out of practice.”
“Millie Archer isn’t here today. Would you mind playing for the children’s singing time?”
Pleased by the invitation, Zoë nodded. “Sure, as long as you’re willing to tolerate a wrong note or two. I haven’t had time to play for several months. I left my piano in Portland.”
“You’ll do fine. The alternative is for me to play, which would be very scary. I can only play the top notes of the music.” The two women laughed together as they made their way down the hall.
“Looks like you’ve got your hands full anyway.” Zoë couldn’t help admiring Debbie, who seemed to volunteer for everything, in addition to juggling her three kids and a thriving home-based mail-order business.
“I know you have a busy day job, too,” Debbie said. “But Billie’s been harping at me to invite Jonah over. Would that work for you?”
Zoë had been thinking about how to broach this very topic. “Absolutely. Jonah’s been asking the same thing. Why don’t you bring Billie to my house?”
They agreed on a day and time.
“You could leave Mindy and Shane with me, too.” Zoë hugged the baby in her arms. She’d be busy watching four little kids, but she didn’t mind. She’d always hoped to have more children. Now she wondered if she’d ever get the chance.
“Oh, that’d be too much,” Debbie said.
“No, it wouldn’t. And it’d give you a break.”
Debbie hesitated. “Okay, but just for two hours. I can get my grocery shopping done without any distractions and then I’ll come rescue you.”
The two women chuckled and Zoë breathed a sigh of delight. More and more, she and Jonah were feeling right at home in this community. They had friends. They were happy for the first time in a long time.
And then the summer would end.
As Zoë sat in front of the piano during singing time, she couldn’t help wondering where Tanner was this morning. What was he doing today? And how could she help him not be estranged from God?
Not her business. But she’d still come to care for Tanner in a friendly sort of way. Maybe in the future she’d have the opportunity to casually bring up the topic again. She wasn’t the answer to anyone’s problems, but maybe she could influence Tanner to give the Lord one more try.
Following the meeting, Zoë stood in the foyer waiting for Jonah to get out of class when Paul Carter approached her. He was a tall, handsome man in a pretty sort of way. Even when he was serious, however, he seemed to always wear a perpetual grin with big, white teeth that Zoë found mildly irritating. It wasn’t logical, but the man gave her the creeps.
“Hi, Zoë. Did you get the information about our father-son outing? We’re going up to Camp Fleshermann for the day. There’ll be lots of games, food and activities for the boys.” He handed her a flyer to advertise the event coming up in two weeks.
“I’d heard about it but didn’t know the details.” She stepped back when he brushed his hand against her arm. It was a friendly gesture, but it didn’t feel right to her. He seemed too clingy, considering they’d only met last week.
“Since Jonah doesn’t have a dad, I’d be happy to be his father for the day.” Again the toothy smile widened Paul’s mouth like a giant clown face.
Zoë forced herself to meet his eyes. Paul was a single father of two sons. Debbie had mentioned that he’d been divorced twice now and had visitation of his sons on the weekends. The boys each had different moms. Zoë didn’t want to be wife number three.
She kept her voice kind as she responded in an even tone. “You’re so nice to offer, but I don’t even know if Jonah will be able to go on the outing that day.”
“Oh. Okay. I’ll check back with you next Sunday. It should be lots of fun.”
Paul crowded closer, invading her personal space. She caught the cloying scent of his heavy cologne and held her breath. She couldn’t help comparing him to Tanner, who always had a light, spicy smell.
When Paul reached up and rubbed her shoulder, Zoë almost bolted. She stepped sideways, wishing he’d stop touching her. She found the man repulsive. She just didn’t get a good feeling around him. He kept coming and she almost tripped over a garbage can in her quest to move away.
Paul rounded the can, following her every move like a stealth bomber. “If you decide Jonah’s going to attend, I’d be happy to pick him up and take—”
“There’s Jonah.” She hurried toward her son, hating herself for being rude. But an overwhelming feeling of distaste had forced her to get out of this conversation right now.
“Okay, then. Talk to you later,” she heard Paul call to her retreating back.
“Mom! Look what I got.” Jonah held up a picture he’d colored of the ancient prophet Noah. A large brown blob had to be the ark. The giraffes were unmistakable, with long, orange necks and bushy tails.
“That’s wonderful, sweetie.” Zoë knelt beside her son, focusing her attention entirely on him. Hoping Paul took the hint and went about his business.
No such luck. When she stood and took Jonah’s hand, Paul still hovered beside the front door like a hawk perched over a field mouse. Although it meant walking around the entire building to get to her car, Zoë pulled Jonah with her and ducked out the back door.
For just a moment, Zoë wished Tanner were here. Paul wouldn’t crowd so close if the fish-and-wildlife specialist were standing nearby. Tanner didn’t swarm her or invade her space. She felt relaxed when he was around.
Protected.
“What’s the hurry? Why are we going around the long way?” Jonah asked, his little legs moving fast to keep up.
“This way we can enjoy the sunny day,” she said.
Inside her car, she drove them home and wondered what to do about a father for Jonah on the upcoming outing. Maybe Blaine, Debbie’s husband, wouldn’t mind chaperoning Jonah for the day along with Billie. It was a logical fix to her problem. She liked Blaine well enough and he seemed to like Jonah. There’d be lots of other fathers and their sons of all ages present. It was just a day trip; no sleepover in a tent. And it’d be good for Jonah to get out and be with the other kids.
And yet, Zoë kept thinking about Tanner and the way he’d taught Jonah to fish. His deep laughter as he patiently disengaged the hook from his pant leg after Jonah had caught it there by accident. The way his expressive eyes lit up with amusement when Jonah decided to let all but one fish swim free.
She wanted to ask Tanner to accompany her son on the outing, but getting him to take her boy on a daylong, church-sponsored activity might be pushing things too far. And too fast.
She just couldn’t do it.
As she pulled into her driveway at home, Zoë thought about the brown rice, fresh broccoli, fruit salad and ice-cream sundaes she’d planned to accompany their fish for dinner. She wished Tanner would be joining them. He’d made it clear he didn’t want anything to do with God, but surely he wouldn’t object to a father-son outing. Would he?
Funny how she’d come to trust Tanner so quickly. In spite of the differences in their approach to work, she felt as though she’d known him forever. They had a lot in common. And they’d found ways to get along together. Tanner was also fun to be with. Any woman would be lucky to—
No! She wasn’t any woman. She came with a lot of baggage. A dead husband and
a six-year-old son. And maybe that wasn’t fair to Tanner. Maybe he didn’t want to be a father to Jonah.
If that were true, he was very good at hiding it. He seemed like a natural dad.
She’d wait until she saw Tanner again. Maybe the opportunity would arise for her to bring up the topic of the father-son outing. He might even volunteer to accompany Jonah. The worst he could say was no. In that event, she’d move to Plan B and ask Blaine to take her boy.
She hoped her plan worked.
* * *
Tanner was a coward. He admitted it freely to himself. He should have agreed to have dinner with Zoë and Jonah tonight. But being around Zoë had completely shattered his composure. He’d fallen hook, line and sinker for her little son. And he was fast falling for her, too.
He looked down at the crumpled piece of paper in his hand. The one Zoë had given him weeks ago with her cell-phone number scrawled beneath her name. Even though she was a coworker, he was seriously considering asking her out on a real date. What could it hurt? Tomorrow afternoon when he drove her out to look at Red Creek, he’d ask her to dinner on Friday night. That should give her time to schedule a babysitter for Jonah.
With his mind made up, Tanner sat on the lumpy sofa in his apartment and worked on some watershed reports. Two hours later, he stared blankly at a ball game on TV, not even aware of who was playing or the score.
He missed Zoë. He missed Jonah. And he was hungry. And sick and tired of microwave meals. He should have gone over to their house tonight. He should have tickled Jonah, laughed, had a good time and then helped Zoë wash the dishes after supper. Then they could have sat together and watched TV while Jonah played in the background. Tanner might have even reached over and held Zoë’s hand. Or wrapped his arm around her shoulders.
Like a real family.
He had a big dilemma on his hands. He liked Zoë. Liked her a lot.
One thought sustained him. He’d see her tomorrow afternoon. And he couldn’t wait.
His plans to ask Zoë out on a date changed abruptly the next morning. Chuck Daniels, the forest supervisor, stuck his head inside Tanner’s office first thing.
“You got a minute to meet in my office?”
“Sure.” Tanner stood and followed his boss down the hall.
“What’s up?” Tanner asked as he closed the door and sat facing Chuck across a wide mahogany desk.
Chuck frowned as he tossed three pink slips toward Tanner. Phone messages with names and numbers scrawled across them. “I spent Friday afternoon returning angry phone calls from three local farmers.”
Tanner picked up the papers and glanced through them. Harry Ragsdale’s name was among them.
Chuck didn’t wait for Tanner to respond. “It seems that our new fishery biologist has been ruffling some feathers with her demands.”
Oh, no. Tanner had been afraid of this. But he thought the situation had been handled. So why had the farmers complained? “Zoë made it clear what was expected of the farmers, but each of them agreed to let us install a screen on their property. She was never rude to any of them. I don’t know why they called you.”
The leather chair creaked as Chuck sat back and glared. Tanner could almost see steam spewing out of his nose and ears. “What exactly did she say to them?”
Tanner recalled the dialogue as best he could, then shrugged, trying to lighten the moment. He knew the last thing the forest supervisor wanted was a bunch of phone calls from angry farmers. “She just did her job, Chuck. It wasn’t a big deal. This is nonsense.”
Chuck leaned forward, his gray eyes narrowed. “Look, Tanner. I don’t want Zoë Lawton upsetting the local farmers so I end up with a bunch of picketers parading outside my office. And I don’t want to see my name on the five-o’clock news or in the newspaper, either. Got it?”
Something hardened inside Tanner. He couldn’t explain why, but he felt compelled to defend Zoë. “The farmers we met with have obviously spoken to each other. They’re being unreasonable. We worked everything out with them and they were satisfied. For them to call and complain like this, I have to believe they just want to make trouble.”
“I don’t care what their reasons are. I don’t want them calling me about this again. You keep that woman in line. You’re her chaperone for this summer fishery project. You take care of it.”
Tanner couldn’t believe this request. It was completely out of line, but Chuck was his boss. Tanner liked Zoë, but he also loved his job. He didn’t want to do anything to jeopardize his future promotions. “And just how do you expect me to keep her in line? I’m not her boss, Chuck. We have no control over her. She works for a different agency. And besides, she’s doing the job she was sent here to do. I can find no fault with her.”
Chuck blew out a harsh breath, his features softening just a bit as he listened to reason. “You’re right. Besides, we only have to deal with her for the summer. Humor her over the next eight weeks, but keep her from making waves. She’ll be leaving at the end of August to go back to Portland. Just keep her in line until then and we’ll be fine.”
Tanner’s heart dropped to the floor and something went cold inside him. “What do you mean she’s leaving? I thought she’d been transferred here to Steelhead.”
“Not permanently. This is just a summer work project for her. Because she’s got a kid, she only accepted this assignment as long as it wouldn’t interfere with her son’s schooling. She’ll be going back to Portland before school starts in the fall, and I say good riddance.”
A war of emotions invaded Tanner’s mind. No one had told him Zoë was here just for the summer. Because she worked for the National Marine Fisheries Service, he wasn’t fully in the loop on information like that. Zoë hadn’t mentioned it, but then it really wasn’t his business. He liked her and Jonah. He wanted to spend time with them. A lot of time. And yet, the same dilemma that had haunted him all his life now reared its ugly head.
He was developing feelings for someone he couldn’t be with long-term.
A heavy weight settled in his stomach. The thought of saying goodbye to Zoë and Jonah left him feeling rotten and grouchy inside. He had his career here in Steelhead and she had hers in Portland. A long-distance relationship would never work between them.
So much for asking her out on a date.
“I’ll do my best to soften her demands with the farmers. It shouldn’t be an issue anymore,” Tanner promised.
“Good.” Chuck nodded, as if that was settled.
As Tanner stood and returned to his own office, he felt a deep sense of loss. He didn’t like the subterfuge his boss demanded from him. It wasn’t right to just humor Zoë. She’d proven herself, and she knew what she was doing. But Tanner didn’t want to jeopardize his own career.
Neither did he like the idea of Zoë returning to Portland. He’d only known her a short time. Surely this empty feeling had nothing to do with her and Jonah leaving in August. It had nothing to do with never seeing them again.
Or did it?
Tanner made an excuse not to work with Zoë that afternoon. He needed time to think. To put some distance between them.
As he sat at his desk, he couldn’t resist the urge to go online and check the job listings from the Portland regional office. His throat tightened when he saw a position for a fisheries biologist. It’d be a slight demotion, but he could fill the position easily enough...if he accepted a transfer to leave Steelhead.
Which he wouldn’t. Not yet. He was just...exploring other opportunities. No harm in that.
With that in mind, he called up the job description. He decided to apply for it without telling anyone. He might or might not get it. What did he have to lose?
Nothing but his heart.
Chapter Eight
Four days later, Tanner parked his truck near the entrance of the Fish an
d Wildlife Office before walking up the front steps of the redbrick building. The United States flag whipped in the summer breeze, a cluster of yellow marigolds surrounding the tall pole. He’d been here so many times, it felt like a second home. But maybe he shouldn’t have come today.
Inside, the reception lobby was empty with a sign on the front counter that said Ring Bell.
Ignoring the bell, Tanner walked toward the back laboratory where he figured Zoë might be working. Either that or in her tidy office. He’d visited her here on numerous occasions, dealing with their work issues, consulting about samples she’d taken or to schedule their next road trip up into the mountains.
He tried to tell himself today was no different. He was here on business, nothing more.
As he approached the lab, his pulse sped up. The light was on, and he peered past the desk at the microscopes, bins for holding fish and the tall refrigerator against the wall. No one was there, the pristine counters showing no signs of work today. Instead, he turned and took the stairs two at a time. His stomach churned as he neared her office, his steps faltering. He couldn’t explain his intense desire to see her.
The clicking sounds of someone typing on a keyboard and business chatter in one of the offices filtered through the air. As he neared her door, he didn’t know what to say. He couldn’t ask her out, so he’d just schedule their next road trip.
The unmistakable voice of a little boy echoed down the hall, followed by a thud-thud like something soft hitting the floor.
“Jonah, please don’t bounce your ball inside the building. Wait until we get outside.” As usual, Zoë’s tone sounded calm and unruffled.
Just hearing her voice settled Tanner’s nerves a smidgen. But Jonah was here. Inside his mother’s office right now.
Tanner froze in midstride. He glanced at his wristwatch and realized it was late afternoon. For some reason, Zoë must have picked Jonah up early from his child-care provider. It was one thing for Tanner to work with Zoë, but he didn’t want to face her son again.
Tanner pivoted on his heels, ready to head back the way he’d come and make a quick getaway. He could do this another time. Or call. Or better yet, just send Zoë an email.
