by Miles, Amy
“I don’t trust him.” I say simply. I would have thought that much would be obvious.
“Did he try to hurt you?” I turn and offer Cable a smile before shaking my head no. “Good, cause if he did…” he lets that statement fall away.
Alex runs his hands through his hair. Stray bits of twigs fall from the matted strands. There are wide tears in his shirt and for the first time I notice just how disheveled both he and Cable look. I narrow my gaze on a cut along Cable’s arm and reach for it.
“What the hell happened to you two?”
“We found supplies,” Cable replies but I feel like there should be more to that statement.
“What, did you steal them from an angry bear?” I roll his arm over and see more cuts, some of them deep. Blood trails down his arm in jagged vines. He doesn’t hiss when I press my finger near the wound but there is a tightening of pain around his eyes.
“Alex?” I turn on him, knowing Cable will try to keep the truth from me.
“We ran into some survivors. They had what we needed.” His indifferent shrug doesn’t fool me. He refuses to meet my gaze as he pushes past and kneels beside the garbage bag roll that he dropped upon first arriving. I follow after him, shaking Cable’s grip off.
“You stole this stuff?” He nods and begins untying three rope knots that hold the bag in place. “And the survivors?”
Alex’s hands fall still. His shoulders curl inward, his head bows low. “They won’t be needing this anymore.”
I whirl around and stare at Cable. His hand is pressed tightly to his pocket. I close the gap between us in three long strides and yank his arm away. He cries out but doesn’t stop me as I shove my hand deep into his pocket. The interior is moist.
Something cold touches my fingers. I draw my hand out and open my palm. Two weapons lie in my hand: a bloodied hunting knife and a coiled bit of wire.
“Oh god,” I drop the weapons and step back. Blood stains my hand. Innocent blood. “You killed them?”
“What?” Alex whirls around. “No, of course we didn’t. They had turned into Withered Ones.”
I glance at Cable. His expression is unreadable. “So why is there blood on these?”
Alex points to the pack on Cable’s back. “That’s from dinner.”
Several hours later, I sit beside the small fire, watching the dancing light flicker against the trees. The smoke billows up, lost to the gray expanse of clouds overhead. Breath hangs before my lips as I warm my hands. The air has turned bitterly cold.
Cable uses his knife to slice off a charred piece of wild hog. The tusks bear signs of blood from where Cable and Alex tried to subdue the animal.
Cable hasn’t said much to me since my earlier accusation. He helped me set up the six person tent in silence. It’s obvious from the confidence he exuded during set up that he spent many of his summers camping. I was all thumbs trying to get the darn poles to stay up.
The tent is bright yellow, hardly what I would call good camouflage, but beggars can't be choosers. It will keep the wind off us tonight. I’m thankful for that.
Alex emerges from the tent. He looks exhausted as he wipes his hands over his face. “Vicky is sleeping. She’s pretty messed up about what happened.”
“And Sal?” I cast a furtive glance toward the zippered door. My protests that he should remain tied up fell on deaf ears as Alex took Sal into the tent.
“He’s passed out from fever.”
Cable meets my gaze then drops it again. “He shouldn’t be in there with us tonight.”
Alex groans as he sinks down onto a rock and takes the offered piece of meat from Cable. Juice runs down his lips and into his beard. He wipes his arms across his mouth to clean it away. “I thought we’ve been over this. He’s part of the group. We care for our own, even when he’s not the most likeable guy.”
“He’s dangerous.” Cable tosses a bit of fat and skin onto the fire, watching it burn.
“He’s in no condition to hurt anyone.”
“You’re wrong.” Both men turn and look at me. I keep my gaze focused on the deep blue flames. “Sal knows he’s turning. I saw it in his eyes earlier when he was choking. He’s no fool, Alex. He remembers why you kept me in the group.”
Cable lowers the leg of meat has been working on carving with his knife and turns to stare at me. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
I meet his gaze head on. “They knew about my blood. That’s why they kept me around. I was supposed to help Eva.”
The bone snaps in Cable’s hand as he rounds on Alex. “Is that true?”
Alex swallows a large piece of meat. “It was...at first. But things changed.”
“What things?” Cable’s voice is low and deadly. I don’t know if Alex notices the way Cable’s grip tightens on his knife, but I do.
“The point is,” I break in, “that Sal thinks my blood can heal him, or at least prolong his fate.”
Cable’s hand moves back toward his lap, a visible sign of relaxing but it’s just for show. If Alex makes one wrong move Cable will attack. I can’t let that happen. Though I don’t agree with some of the shots Alex has called recently, but there is strength in numbers.
“But your blood can't heal him.” Cable takes another bite and slowly chews it. “You’re not a universal donor and you’re sure as heck not a cure.”
Alex’s back straightens as he looks toward me. “But I thought—”
“No.” Cable tosses the meatless bone onto the fire and wipes his hands on his pants. “If her blood were mixed with his, he’d still die. Probably in a worse way than he already is.”
“We tested her blood. Victoria said she was a universal donor.”
“She wasn’t completely wrong.” I set my portion of meat down, my stomach no longer happy with the offering. I relay the details of my time spent in the company of the military, what we’d discovered. As I speak, I watch Alex visibly pale and wonder if he had held out hope that someday I could save his life too.
Maybe he didn’t bring those men back to the farm to capture us after all. Maybe it really was a coincidence. Maybe Alex had different intentions all along.
One glance at Cable reveals that I’m not the only one thinking it.
“So what do we do? Leave him here? Let him change? “Alex rubs absently at his arms. “Victoria would never allow it. She’s a tough girl, in her own right. She wouldn’t leave him before.”
“Then he’d probably kill her and risk mixing their blood,” Cable says, staring blankly into the fire.
“There’s only one choice,” I whisper. My stomach twists at the thought. I don’t think I could do it. Not in cold blood. If only I’d let Sal suffocate when it would have been by natural causes.
Cable remains silent. Alex’s mouth slackens. His eyebrows rise in disbelief as he stares between us. “You’re talking about murder.”
“No.” Cable presses his knees together then rises. He stares down at Alex. “That’s survival.”
He turns and walks away, heading into the forest. I wonder if I should go after him, but I can’t leave Alex. Not until I can make him see reason.
“He’s not well, Alex. You know that. It’s only a matter of time before he turns.”
“So then let him turn!” His nostrils flare as he kicks out his foot. A bit of dirt snuffs out the flames on the edge of the fire pit.
I draw in a breath and hold it for a moment until I’m sure I can control my frustration. “If he turns, he will be in that tent with us, or on a hiking path, or god knows where else. Do you really think Victoria can handle seeing that? She’s already in some sort of shock over what happened back in St. Louis.”
Slipping off my rock, I kneel beside him and place a hand on his knee. I’ve never intentionally touched Alex before. He swallows as his gaze settles on my hand. “Sal is part of the group. I know that, but how long will he continue to be Sal? You saw his desperation. We all did. Can you really live with yourself if he kills me or Vicky in our sleep? Can y
ou live with yourself if you wait too long?”
Alex’s skin becomes ghostly pale. His hands tremble. He sucks his lower lip between his teeth. “I never wanted people to look to me for answers.”
I sink down beside him and wait as he blows out several deep breaths. His gaze grows distant, lost to the past. “I thought Devon would be a good leader. He seemed strong willed, level headed, but then he took in that man and wife. Locked them away and said it was for our own good. For Eva’s.”
He rubs at his chest as his eyebrows pinch in a grimace of long claimed regret. “I tried to tell myself that it was the right thing to do. To protect our group, but you were right. We were no different than those men who roamed the streets. We became the one thing we hated the most.”
Reaching up, I place my hand on his forearm. His skin feels cold to the touch, despite the fire before us. “You did what you had to do to survive.”
He nods slowly. “And that’s what we have to do again.”
He turns his gaze away from the fire to look at me. I see a haggard man, wearied and burdened by the impossible choices laid out before him. I feel the same way. I just hide it a bit better. “I can’t do it.”
I’d struggle to follow through with it as well. Sal and I may have an intense dislike of each other, but at the moment he’s still alive, still human. Could I really look into his eyes and know that I’m the last thing he would see?
“I’ll do it.” I look up to see Cable has returned. The wire from his pocket is wound tightly around his hands. His feet are firmly planted, his chin held high. He has the look of a man who’s set aside all emotion to get a task done, no matter how horrifying it may be.
“Cable…”
He shakes his head and I fall silent. “I won’t let you have blood on your hands. We’ve made it this far without that.”
“Someday I will have to kill.”
He nods slowly. “But not today.”
Alex buries his head in his hands. “I can’t believe we’re even talking about this. It’s so...so sick.”
“It’s reality,” I whisper, hugging my arms about myself. Has the world really sunk to this low? That innocent people are sacrificed for the greater good. I guess that happened before all of this. Kids died by the thousands each day from starvation or lack of water. Homeless died on the streets from the cold. Wars were started for financial gain.
The world hasn’t become more twisted. It just, in some insane way, become more simple. You fight. You survive. Nothing else matters now.
“Not tonight.” Alex says, slowly raising his head. “Vicky is in there with him right now. If we are going to do it, it has to be when she’s not around.”
I look to Cable and note the tension in his jaw. His grip on the wire doesn’t loosen. His stance doesn’t ease.
“I’ll take the first watch. Make sure things stay quiet. Cable can take the second watch and Avery the final. If we make it through the night then we can deal with it tomorrow.”
“And if not?” I question.
Alex opens and closes his mouth. He doesn’t have the answers. None of us do.
NINETEEN
Sleep eludes me for several hours. I listen to Cable and Alex talking by the fire, focusing on the rise and fall of their tone in an attempt to will myself to sleep. Victoria rests beside me. Her frizzy hair is plastered to the side of her face, her glasses askew on her nose. Sal snores on her other side, loud and as obnoxious as usual. I should have put myself between them, to ensure Victoria’s safety, but I couldn’t bring myself to be near him.
The night is cold and endless. The hours trudge by as if time no longer holds any meaning. I’d like to kick old Father Time in the crotch to get him motivated again. That would show the bastard I mean business.
I lie motionless when Alex returns some time later from his shift and crashes down beside me. I don't shift away when he presses his back against mine. Instead I wait until his breathing grows deep and steady before I inch away.
Through the tent wall I watch Cable’s shadow, lit by the dwindling flames. A spark flares as he leans forward and tosses another log on the fire. I’m worried about him. He needs to sleep.
More than that, I’m worried about his mental state. Offering to kill someone must mess with your head, even if you’ve killed before. Cable told me once that you never forget, and you never forgive. I don’t want Sal’s blood on his hands any more than I want it on my own.
Alex shifts in his sleep and elbows me in the ribs. I grunt in pain but have nowhere to go. A shadow falls over me and I look up to see Cable standing by the door. “I’m fine,” I whisper. “Just Alex taking up too much room.”
“Well shove him back over.”
I smirk as he turns and heads back to the fire, giving Alex a jab in the side for good measure. He snorts in his sleep and rolls away. Tucking my arm under my head, I roll to get comfortable and freeze.
In the flickering of the firelight, two eyes stare back at me. Mangled hair and a full beard make Sal look even more fierce than I remembered. His lip is curled into a feral snarl. The bruise along the side of his face looks angry and puffy.
“Cab—” my scream cuts off as Sal launches himself at me. His hands grip my throat as he sprawls over Victoria. The woman wakes and wails like a banshee beside me, beating against Sal’s side. He doesn’t seem fazed by her attack. His eyes remain locked onto me.
His grip on my throat is unnaturally strong. His fingers dig into my flesh. My lips part, sucking in air that has nowhere to go.
Victoria’s screams sound garbled in my ears. I claw at Sal’s hands, tearing skin back from his forearms but he doesn’t relent. Pure, unadulterated rage stares me in the eye and I’m terrified his face will be the last thing I see.
“Get off her!”
Sal’s face distorts as a fist slams into his cheek. Blood and spittle splash my face and the grip on my neck decreases but doesn’t disappear completely. I gasp for breath, taking small sips of air into my burning lungs. Heat flames in my face as blood pumps loudly in my ears.
“Alex, get him off her!”
I’m on vaguely aware of someone clawing at me. Sal’s face reappears. I spot the maniacal gaze a split second before he sinks his teeth into my shoulder. I scream, arching my back.
“Shit!” Alex yells from beside me. My body shakes with each punch he lands against Sal’s head. I cry out as his teeth tear at my flesh, refusing to give up his hold. “Cable, he bit her!”
“Get out of my way!”
The tent overhead shakes violently. I hear the sound of shredding fabric and a moment later Cable appears over me. A glint of silver flashes before my eyes. Sal’s head rears back. My blood stains his chin. I place a trembling hand over my shoulder, wincing at the pain.
“Take care of her,” Cable grunts and man handles Sal out of the tent.
I focus on Victoria’s whimpers over the scuffling sounds. Alex’s face is blurry as he kneels before me. I shake my head, trying to clear my thoughts but it’s a losing battle.
“Just hold on,” Alex says nearby. I hear rustling but give in to the pain and close my eyes.
When I wake the sun shines just above the horizon. Beautiful pastel blues, pinks and yellows dot the landscape as I ease myself upright. My shoulder twinges. I press my hand to the bandage and feel blood soak through.
“Easy.” I turn to see Victoria sitting beside me. She no longer rocks, no longer looks lost to her own world. There is intelligence in her eyes for the first time in weeks. “You’re gonna be sore for a few days.”
I grimace at the pain. She tsks and reaches out to place a new bandage on my shoulder. The cold morning air bites at my skin and I realize that I’ve been stripped down to only a tank top. “How bad is it?”
“Not as bad as it feels, I’m sure.”
I inhale sharply and try to look down at the wound. Victoria places a hand on my arm. “I disinfected it the best I could but....”
I understand the deeper meaning to her
words. Sal was infected. It would only make sense that his bite holds the potential to spread the disease to me.
Covering my hand over my shoulder, I offer her a smile. “Thanks. “
She dips her head in acknowledgement and begins tucking the cleaning supplies back in her pack. She grabs a roll of gauze and raises my arm. I notice a quake in her hands as I grit my teeth at the pain. With my free hand I rub my throat, sure that the pale skin is a mass of bruising now. It hurts to swallow, to breathe. “And Sal?”
Her hands pause in their work, her knuckles swollen and fingers curled. Alex had mentioned that she suffers from bouts of arthritis. The cold makes it worse. The gauze she wraps around my shoulder to hold the new bandage in place falls from her fingers and she lowers her head. The chain holding her glasses swing before her chest. “Gone.”
“I’m sorry,” I whisper, though I know I’m not. Not sorry that he’s dead. That he’s no longer a part of the group. Now all I want to know is who ended it.
“Don’t be.” She plasters a smile back on and continues her ministrations. “He became a danger, just like you said he would.”
“You...you heard all of that?”
Victoria nods. Her glasses slide down nearly to the end of her nose. She doesn’t bother to push them back. “I heard a lot more than I let on.”
“You were faking it?”
She offers me a pained smile. “Some. Though there were plenty of times that I would lose myself for a while. I don’t blame you for thinking I was going crazy. I would have agreed with you.”
“But you’re back now?”
She shoves her hair back out of her face. The deep set of wrinkles and bruising along her face speaks of how hard this life has been on her. She is far too old to keep going at this pace. “For now. It comes and goes, just like before. My daughter insisted that I be checked by a specialist. That’s where I was going when our flight was detoured to St. Louis.”
“You flew alone?”
