There had to be some explanation.
She ran a finger along the couch cushion’s seam as Cam reappeared.
“It’s pretty plain, isn’t it?” he asked.
She crossed her arms, then pressed a finger against her lips. “Nothing a few throw pillows and art wouldn’t fix.” Maybe.
He stood beside her and nodded. “I guess.” He glanced her way. “Ready to see the kitchen?”
Maybe he collected Matchbox cars. Guys did that, didn’t they? She prayed her smile looked natural. “Lead the way.”
The kitchen made her momentarily forget the toys. The upper cabinets were a winter white, the lowers gray and topped with what looked like marble countertops. The backsplash boasted a marble, chevroned pattern that tied it all together. A teal teapot sat on the back burner of a six-burner, stainless steel range.
“Wow. You did this?”
“Mostly.” He crossed his arms over his chest, satisfaction in his stance. “I hired a designer to get the layout and design right, but I did the tiling. Helped with the cabinet install. Put in the lights.”
She glanced up at the recessed lighting above. “You’re good.”
“Thank you.” He relaxed his arms. “I’ll get my laptop, then we’ll go.”
“Okay.”
He headed for the stairs.
“Mind if I get a glass of water?” she called after him.
“Sure.” His words came from partway up the stairs. “Glasses are above the dishwasher.”
She found the cabinet and opened it. Half a dozen tall, glass glasses stood on the right side. She reached for one.
On the left side sat a stack of small, plastic cups.
Her hand halted a fingertip away from a glass.
Cups with Disney princes and princesses. Cups with Dora the Explorer…
Cups for children.
Huh.
Cam’s footsteps sounded upstairs.
Jordan grabbed an adult glass and crossed to the stainless steel fridge, filling it there. She stayed in front of the refrigerator as she drank and scanned the pictures across the front. She’d just enjoy pictures of Cam and forget everything odd she’d seen.
She smiled at a picture of him with her brothers after doing some run together. Cam wasn’t short, but he did look a little short next to her two giants of brothers, both well over six feet tall. Cam was definitely the best looking of the bunch, though. His brown hair wasn’t as dark as hers, and he wasn’t as lean as Dillan and Garrett, but he sure had the best smile. The nicest eyes.
After a lifetime being around such tall men, dating someone closer to her own height sounded wonderful.
Most of the other pictures held familiar faces. Cam with guys from the church’s singles group. Pictures from last year’s Memorial Day party. From a winter day spent downtown. From the Fourth of July.
Funny—she’d never thought a guy would put up pictures like this. Especially pictures of friends from church. Where were the pictures of his family?
She scanned a couple more that included people she knew until she came to one with Cam holding a young girl in his arms, a smiling brown-haired woman beside him, her hand wrapped around his upper arm. Like he belonged to her. To the little girl.
To them.
Cam started down the stairs.
Jordan took another swallow and studied the picture more closely.
The girl—did she have Down Syndrome?
Yes, it looked like it.
She studied Cam’s face.
The picture seemed fairly recent. Maybe a year or so old. Who was this girl? This woman? Where did they fit with Cam? Were they family?
Or something else?
He entered the kitchen and set his laptop on the island. “Ready to go?”
“Sure.” She dragged her gaze from the picture to him.
Cam stood still, his own gaze stuck on the picture, looking as if he wished she hadn’t seen it.
Why? She looked back at it, praying her voice would sound nonchalant. “Who’s this?”
“Just…” It sounded like he swallowed. “Someone close to me.”
The little girl held the teddy bear she’d seen on the stairs.
Jordan caught her breath. What did this mean? Nothing? Something?
Everything?
She faced him again, not faking a thing this time. “How close, Cam?”
Somehow, the question softened him. “Very close, Jordan.”
“That doesn’t make me…” Should she be honest? She pushed her bangs to the side. She’d played the game with Matt, waiting and wondering, never being bold enough to ask where she stood or why he couldn’t commit. No, she was done with that dance. It was time to be bold. “I don’t know if I like that.”
Slowly, he walked to her, his hands in his pockets. He looked at the picture, then back at her. “I can’t explain her to you now, Jordan. Someday I hope to. But for now I need you to trust me.”
Though his words were vague, Jordan clung to the promise beneath them. She took a deep breath. The woman, the girl, the bear, the cups … “Okay. I’ll trust you.”
“Thank you.” His brown eyes searched hers, warmth coming from them. “That means a lot.”
Good. It should.
He held a hand toward his living room. “You ready to go?”
“Sure.”
She set the drink aside while he tucked his laptop under his arm and led the way to the front door.
But as they passed the staircase, Jordan couldn’t help looking for the teddy bear and toy cars.
The staircase was empty.
****
Before dialing his client, he waited until the silver Altima drove by and turned at the intersection.
“Yes?” the man said, never one for hello.
“I found him.”
Something creaked in the background. “Really. What’s his name?”
“Cameron Winters.”
“Cameron Winters.” Silence held for a few moments. “Then we’re looking for a Hannah Winters.”
“That would be my guess.”
“You found her yet?”
“No, but I’m on his street and he just left with a woman.”
“Hannah?” Excitement colored the client’s tone.
“No. Younger. Darker hair.”
“Maybe she knows where Hannah is.”
“Maybe. I wouldn’t know.”
“You will.”
“Of course.” That went without saying. He started his engine and followed the path the Altima had taken. “Now that I know his name, I can start looking for her under her maiden name. Give me a few days, and I’ll have more information.”
“I want it faster than that, Thomas.”
Impatient, arrogant clients were the worst. “I’ll get the info when I get it, and not before.”
The man grunted. “Fine. Just… I need to find Hannah.”
“And we’ll find her. If we have the right man, Winters will lead us to her.”
Chapter Three
The afternoon could not have gone better.
Sure, there’d initially been some tension after Jordan saw Anna’s picture and he hadn’t been able to talk about it, but lunch together at her favorite Mexican restaurant eventually fixed that. By the time they left, two hours and one big tip later, it felt like everything was right between them again.
It felt so right being with Jordan, like she really was the woman he could spend his life with. The woman he could grow old with.
The woman he could trust Anna and Sophie with.
When they finally headed to Jordan’s parents’ house, it was almost time for dinner. Dillan and Miska arrived at the same time, and Jordan oohed and ahhed over Miska’s ring.
Jordan’s other brother, Garrett, was already there, and it seemed to take a good ten minutes to get everyone out of the foyer, what with all the hugs and congratulations and women gushing and everything.
Shari, Jordan’s mom, had cooked a special meal to celebrate the
engagement. Seated at the table next to Jordan and across from Dillan, Cam felt like one of the family. Like a part of one of the best families he knew.
How much he wanted a life like this.
After dinner, he hooked his laptop up to the Fosters’ TV and, again, seated himself beside Jordan as they watched the video he’d recorded of the proposal. There wasn’t much audio to speak of since he and Jordan were too far from the couple to pick up sound, but the video had caught little bits of Jordan’s excited whisperings, her barely contained squeal when Dillan had dropped to one knee, and a few deep chuckles from Cam.
And of course, it had also captured all the romance of a couple getting engaged.
Cam glanced at Dillan and Miska seated close together on the couch, Dillan’s arm around her, his fingers stroking her shoulder. He couldn’t stop smiling, glancing from time to time at Miska who couldn’t stop watching the rerun of their engagement.
Across the room, Shari wiped tears from her eyes, and her husband squeezed her hand. Even Garrett, the one who always had a joke for everything, seemed happy with the day’s event.
Would they react the same if it was him and Jordan getting engaged?
The depth of how much he hoped so surprised him. How had he fallen so fast for Jordan? Could he be this certain this quickly? What if he told her too much and then she ended up not being the one?
Could he risk telling her everything? Putting Anna and Sophie—and even himself—at risk?
The video ended, and Jordan squeezed his arm. “That was so great. I want to see it again.”
Heaving a dramatic sigh, Garrett pushed himself up off a recliner. “You girls watch it to your heart’s content. I say us guys need to shoot some hoops.”
Like Cam ever had a chance to win, playing against two guys that tall. “Why do you always want to play basketball when I’m here?” he asked.
Garrett grinned, as if he’d read Cam’s mind. “Dillan, you in?”
“What?” Dillan looked up from where he still sat, deep in conversation with Miska.
Cam stood. “Actually, I need to head home.”
Jordan linked her fingers through his. “Already?”
Garrett and Dillan straightened. Eyed him.
Suddenly it felt a bit hot and crowded in the living room. “Yeah, I need to go. Got some things to take care of tonight.” Anna might be home soon, and she’d probably need some sort of help. Emotional help. Either she or the kids.
Garrett crossed his arms, cocked his head, and narrowed his eyes, but his mouth tightened as if he was fighting a smile.
Didn’t Jordan see that? Cam let go of her hand. “Thanks for letting me crash the Foster party.” He offered Dillan a hand. “Congrats again, man.”
Dillan shook his hand but looked between him and his sister. “Thanks. Glad you were here.”
Jordan’s fingers settled around his arm. “I’ll walk you out.”
So she was trying to get him killed. “All right.”
He said his goodbyes to Miska, to Jordan’s parents, and a now openly smirking Garrett and followed Jordan to the foyer.
She paused before the front door and smiled up at him. “Today was great, Cam.”
Yeah, it was. Except for the last thirty seconds maybe. He pushed that uncomfortableness away and took in the sight of the woman he’d fallen for. “Thanks for spending it with me.”
“Anytime. And thanks for hanging out with my family. Everyone loves you, you know.”
No. They only liked what they knew about him. His smile faded, and he couldn’t help running a hand through his hair, glancing around the small entryway for something to say. “Jordan…”
Why did it always come back to the secrets he’d kept? The things he regretted? To events he couldn’t change?
Jordan’s eyes held no worries, no confusion. Just confidence.
Because she was so young and innocent.
She didn’t know his story. Didn’t know his family’s saga. Didn’t know the damage done, the trouble they’d been in. Her family was perfect—just about. Could she really understand what had made him him?
“I don’t come from this.” He flipped his hand out, gesturing to the space around him. “Your family, Jordan… They’re great, but I can’t give you this.”
“What do you mean?” She stepped closer. “Give me what? I’m not following.”
“Your parents are wonderful. You’ve got this close-knit family that loves each other. I’ve got…” A mess.
“Have you forgotten about Miska? About Garrett?” she asked, clearly referring to the less-than-perfect pasts they’d come from.
“It isn’t like that, Jordan.”
She tipped her head, gave him an are-you-serious glare.
“Look, I’m being honest with you. I like you… way too much. But there are things I haven’t told anybody. Things I can’t tell anybody.”
“Why not?”
She wasn’t even trying to understand, was she? Which showed how black and white her world was. “Because it’s not safe to, Jordan.”
“You’re not making sense.”
He probably wasn’t, not to her. “I don’t know if this is a good idea—”
She laughed incredulously. “Are you serious? You’re worse than Matt, Cam! At least we’d date for a few months before he’d disappear. You didn’t even make it through the day.”
“Hey. Stop it. That’s not what this is.”
“Really?” Her eyes shone. “You’re not ending things between us? Because that’s exactly what it sounds like.”
“There’s nothing to end, Jordan. We haven’t started.”
She jerked open the front door. “Good. Then leave.”
“No.” This whole conversation had just gone insane. “You’re blowing this out of proportion. You’re not listening to me.”
“No, I’m listening. You’ve spent a morning and an afternoon with me, and you’re chickening out.” Her voice quivered, the anger that had colored it gone. “I’m so tired of guys being like this. Playing me, jerking me one way and then the other.”
“I’m not playing you,” he growled.
“Then what are you doing?”
Her question stumped him. He was doing the same thing he always did—protecting the woman he was dating. Keeping her at a distance, just in case the past came back to haunt him.
Like before, the wall he put up would cost him a relationship, love, a new family.
He couldn’t lose Jordan. But how could he tell her everything? It wasn’t his call to make.
Dillan came around the corner from the living room, a grin on his face. “I hope I’m not interrupting, but Garrett thinks you two are—”
“Just saying goodbye.” Jordan’s voice was firm. Final. “See you at church, Cam.”
“You said you’d trust me,” he reminded her.
“And then you pulled a Matt. ’Bye, Cam.” She pulled the door open even wider and gestured for him to leave.
Cam looked at Dillan for help, but Dillan’s face only registered surprise and confusion as he stared at his sister.
Once again, Cam had made a mess of it. And in record time too. As much as he wanted to stay and fight, he couldn’t. Not yet. He nodded goodnight to Jordan, then to Dillan. “See you guys tomorrow.” He stepped through the doorway.
The door closed, loudly, behind him.
Cam halted on the sidewalk, tempted to turn around and tell her to quit throwing a fit. But this wasn’t the right time or place. Not when they were celebrating Dillan and Miska’s engagement. Jordan needed an evening to cool off.
And he needed time to think. To figure out how to be open with a woman when he couldn’t even talk about the majority of his life.
Basically, he needed a miracle.
Chapter Four
Anna was already home when Cam pulled into his driveway. Her car was tucked in the garage, out of sight like always, but the front door was open, the screen door offering a peek into the entryway.
; When he walked through the door, the sound of Anna cleaning the kitchen met him—the clank of a pot in the sink and the steady splash of running water. He tossed his keys onto the console table by the coat closet and followed the sounds.
She was looking over her shoulder at the doorway when he entered, her hand clenched around a metal sauce pan. Her grip relaxed, and she smiled at him. “Hey. How are you?”
“I’m okay.” He eased onto a stool on the other side of the island. He felt old. Old, tired, weary. “How are you all?”
“Hanging in there.”
“How’s Sophie?”
“The same.” She rinsed the pan and set it on top of a stack of other clean dishes in the dish drain. “If it’s okay with you, I’d like to head back. Spend the night with her.”
Which meant he might not make it to church tomorrow. Wouldn’t get to see Jordan. What timing. He ran a hand down the back of his neck. “Sure.”
She dried her hands on the towel on the oven rail and tightened her ponytail, studying him the entire time. “Cameron? What’s going on?”
He rested his elbow on the island top, ran his thumb across his lip, and stared past her, out the kitchen window into the backyard.
Avery and Logan chased each other across the grass, hidden by the high walls of his privacy fence.
What he wouldn’t give to have a whole family. To have a wife he loved, who loved him back. To have his own kids filling the extra bedrooms in his house—the bedrooms Avery, Logan, and Anna now filled.
Anna interrupted his thoughts. “What happened with Jordan today?”
“Her brother got engaged.”
“Your friend? Dillan?”
Cam nodded.
“And Jordan?”
He met Anna’s eyes. “She wanted to date me.”
“That’s great.”
“Wanted. Past tense.” He sighed. “I brought her here today. Just for a few minutes. She saw your picture. Yours and Sophie’s.”
Anna glanced at the fridge, then back at him. “What happened?”
“The same thing that always happens. I can’t tell her anything—except she took it wrong and got mad at me. Thought I was ending things.”
Taken: A Kept Novella Page 2
