My stomach chose that moment to growl. It was loud and long, and Dee giggled.
Giggled. Like a schoolgirl. It was short and high-pitched, and it amused me. I chuckled at the strange sound.
“Hungry?” she asked, the sarcasm evident.
“So it would seem.”
“I have cold chicken.”
“Lead the way.”
We sat on the sofa, a plate of cold chicken between us. Apparently, I had turned into Aiden since I had wolfed down three pieces of chicken, while Dee nibbled on a drumstick. I decided I had built up an appetite with all the sex and the talking. I needed to replenish my dwindling energy.
It was still dark out, but I knew, all too soon, dawn would begin and our night would end. I wasn’t sure I would get another night like the one we had. Dee had been unusually defenseless, and I had taken full advantage of it.
And I wasn’t done yet.
“Since it’s obvious neither of us is going back to sleep and we’re being all honest, I have a question for you, girlfriend of mine.”
She narrowed her eyes. “You can stop calling me that.”
“Nope. You agreed.”
“What is your question?” She huffed, tossing down the drumstick and wiping her fingers.
“What about your childhood, Dee? I know you didn’t have it easy.”
“No, I didn’t. All my parents did was argue. My mother was unstable, and my father was absent a lot—even before he left. I tried to protect Cami as best I could.”
“Who protected you?”
“No one, I guess.”
I wanted to tell her I would protect her for the rest of her life, but she wasn’t ready to hear those words. I took the plate between us, placing it on the coffee table. I shifted closer, our knees touching, and entwined our fingers. I liked being able to touch her that way.
“Why are you so adamant about never falling in love?”
I expected her to tell me the subject wasn’t open for discussion. Even to push away from me and tell me it was time to leave. She didn’t, though. She frowned, lifted her thumb to her mouth, and nibbled on it absently.
“My mother was obsessed with my father. Everything revolved around him. How she dressed, the way she decorated the house, what she cooked. Always his favorites. The colors he liked. When he got home, she pushed us aside. She fed us early. We were bathed and put in our rooms so she was free to be with him.” She gnawed on her thumb harder, and I pulled it away from her mouth with a shake of my head.
She grimaced, tugging her hand away, but not biting at her thumb. “She smothered him. When she’d have one of her episodes, it became worse. There’d be crying and screaming. Fights. She’d accuse him of having an affair. He’d beg her to take her meds. It was a vicious circle.”
“Then he left.”
“Yes,” she acknowledged. “He walked away. It had been getting worse. The fights, him staying away, her acting out, not taking her pills. It was horrible. Then one day, he was gone. He packed a bag and walked away. She literally grabbed his legs, begging him not to go. He told her he was done and shook her off.”
A tear rolled down her cheek. “Poor Cami watched, confused, not understanding what was going on. She called out and asked him to take us. He looked at her and said he couldn’t. He left us all.” She sighed and swallowed audibly. “You know what happened. My mom never recovered. I looked after Cami, hoping Mom would straighten up, but she never did. She became ill with cancer and refused treatment. She died and left us alone.”
“I think you were already alone, Dee.”
“I suppose we were.”
“So your parents turned you off love?”
She hesitated, and I shifted closer, rubbing her thighs in comfort.
“You really want to know?”
“Yes.”
“I had a few relationships as I got older, but none I was particularly invested in. I had seen what love could do to a person and I wasn’t overly interested. At the time, I thought I was simply incapable of truly loving anyone. I decided I was like my dad—unfeeling.”
I scowled at those words but remained silent.
“When I finished school, I got a job with a large firm. I was low woman on the totem pole, so to speak, and I was assigned all the smaller and less desirable tasks. But I worked hard. One night, I’d stayed late and a lawyer came into the library looking for something. I helped him find it since I had been looking for similar cases a few days prior. We sort of hit it off, and he started dropping by more often. Eventually, we started having an affair.” She sighed. “I thought I was in love.”
I was shocked to discover my hands locked in fists by her legs. The thought of another man touching her, loving her, drove me crazy. I forced myself to relax, loosening my hands, and crossed my arms across my chest.
“He was married, I take it?”
“No. Todd was young, ambitious—working his way up the corporate ladder. He was being fast-tracked for partnership. He told me he wanted to remain private. He didn’t want the partners to think he was concentrating on anything but the firm. I believed him. I didn’t tell a soul.”
I arched my eyebrow. “Not even Cami?”
“No. No one. We met in secret. It added a layer of naughtiness to the relationship. Trysts in the library. A hotel. He made me promises about when he became partner. Our life together. How he’d take care of me. I helped him in secret with every case he had. Dug up facts, cited cases, anything he needed. I thought we were an amazing couple.”
I had a good idea where her story was going, but still, I asked. “What happened?”
She laughed, sounding bitter. “Todd announced his engagement at a function at the office. To one of the partner’s daughters. I wasn’t supposed to be there that night, so I think he thought it was safe. I was so shocked that I stumbled out of the room and into the library to try to gather myself. I sat there for a long time to calm down, and when I left to go home, I heard him in another office down the hall talking on the phone—about me—bragging about how he had the best of both worlds. A slut to suck his cock whenever he wanted, help him with his job load, and a beautiful wife to show off on his arm and boost his career. He figured he’d make partner in a few months and eventually run the practice since her father held the majority shares.”
Rage tore through me.
“What did you do?”
“Confronted him. He told me he had to marry her, but he loved me not her. However, when I told him I’d overheard him in the office, he knew it was pointless to pretend. It got heated and ugly. I kicked him in the nuts and left.”
“Good girl.”
She shook her head. “The next day, I was fired for sexual harassment against him. I tried to fight back, to deny it, but it was his word against mine. No one had ever seen us together, and he was smart enough never to say who he was fucking to the other lawyers.” She scoffed. “I didn’t know what to do, but I got a call from the office where I work now. One of the lawyers used to work at that firm and knew how they operated—the whole ‘boys club’ attitude. She believed me—every word. She offered me a new job, and I’ve been there ever since. After much thought, I decided not to go after him.” She ran a hand through her hair. “He was caught screwing another lawyer, his marriage failed, and he was fired, so there’s that. The last I heard, he was an ambulance chaser when he was sober enough to go into the office.”
“He got what he deserved.”
“I suppose. I don’t spare much time thinking about him. I learned my lesson, though. Like you, Maddox, I swore I would never again allow someone to have that much control and power over me. He never loved me—he used me—and I let him. I realized what I had been feeling for him was lust and not love, but it was enough to prove to me how dangerous love was to people. I watched it with my parents, I witnessed it at work, and I still let the thought of it swallow me up. I swore I would never again let anyone control my life, except me. I swore off it.”
“You are capable o
f love,” I insisted quietly.
“Yes. The lesson came with a benefit. I realized I wasn’t unfeeling like my father. I do love Cami—with all my heart. I’m very fond of Emmy. Even Bentley, Aiden—” she reached out her hand, squeezing my arm “—and you. I am capable of feeling love. Just not romantic love. Never again.”
Her tone held finality.
“He was at fault, not you.”
She stood, brushing off her silky robe.
“Regardless, it showed me how easy it was to fall into the trap. I like men. I enjoy sex. Still, it doesn’t mean I have to fall in love—they are not inclusive.”
“Some would say the best sex is with someone you love.”
“Well, we prove them wrong, don’t we?” She leaned down and brushed my lips. “Enough sharing. I have to get ready for work, and so do you. You can let yourself out, yes?”
“Yes.”
She hurried away, and I sat lost in my thoughts for a while.
Love had burned her. Her father’s desertion, her mother’s rejection, and the asshole that used her. They all made her think she was incapable of the depth of that emotion.
I knew better. I had seen her with her sister, with Emmy, and even the way she treated Bentley and Aiden. Me. Her capacity for love was deep, but she was too frightened to relinquish control for fear of getting hurt again.
I knew how she felt. She was the one who had changed my mind about love.
I would have to prove to her the reward was worth the risk.
Because the reward of her was worth it to me.
Maddox
DEE OPENED HER door on Sunday morning, looking decidedly nervous.
I indicated the new keypad feature on her door. “I see Reid was here. Is the system not working? You didn’t use the remote.”
“Oh yes, but I was right here. No need for the fancy gadgets.”
“You should check to make sure who is at the door, Dee.”
She rolled her eyes. “I heard the elevator. I know your footsteps, Maddox.”
I wanted to grin at that intimate piece of information.
“Use the system, Dee. We need all the feedback we can get.”
“Fine. I need to grab my coat.”
She was out of sorts again and tense.
“Sure.”
I helped her on with her coat, rubbing her shoulders lightly. I lifted her hand, inspecting the fresh nail bites on the pad of her thumb. “What’s going on, Dee?”
“I don’t want you to tell them we’re dating,” she blurted out.
“We agreed. We are.”
“No. You agreed. We’re just having sex. I’m too old to be dating.”
Taking her arm, I escorted her to the elevator, studying her as we descended to the parking garage. “I am going to say this once. I know you’re three years older than I am. It’s nothing. Get over it.”
“It’s not that—well, not only that. The term dating in general for me . . . I don’t like it. I’m not comfortable with it.”
I crossed my arms. “Fine. We’re in a relationship. How’s that?”
“Better than dating. It still feels like a lie, though.”
I took her shoulders, meeting her gaze. “Again, this is the last time I’m going to repeat myself. What we call a relationship and how others view it, is not our problem.”
“But—”
I interrupted her. “Are you having sex with anyone else?”
“No.”
“Are you having sex with me?”
Her lips curled into a smirk. I found it rather sexy.
“Yes.”
“Do we have dinner together? Talk? Call and text each other?”
She rolled her eyes. “Yes.”
“Then it’s a fucking relationship. End of story. And today, we’re telling our friends.”
“But . . .”
I kissed her hard. “Shut up, Dee. For once, just shut up.”
Twice, I pulled her thumb away from her mouth at Bentley’s place. She was jumpy and edgy. Even Bentley noticed her odd behavior, arching his eyebrow at me in silence. Finally, I decided just to lay it out there. I cleared my throat, getting everyone’s attention.
“So, Cami, your sister and I are in a relationship. Are you okay with that?”
Dee grabbed my knee. Cami’s fork froze partway to her mouth, and she gaped at me. Emmy looked shocked. Bentley smirked. Aiden smacked the table.
“I knew it.”
“You’re dating?” Cami gasped. “For real?”
Dee tensed, and I placed a calming hand on her shoulder.
“Dee doesn’t like the word dating. We’re in an exclusive relationship. With each other.”
Cami’s gaze bounced between Dee and me. “And you’re asking my permission?”
“No,” I replied easily. “I was being polite.” I tugged Dee closer, trying to get her to relax. “We wanted to share.”
“I think we need to talk,” Cami whispered, looking at Dee.
Dee stiffened more. “Nothing to talk about. You’re not the only one moving on with your life. Maddox and I are together. I doubt it’s a huge shock, and although he was being funny, if you’re not okay with it, that’s your problem.”
The whole table stilled.
I dropped my lips to Dee’s ear. “I think she’s a little worried, Dee. Don’t get defensive.”
“As long as you’re happy, of course I’m okay with it,” Cami insisted. “You didn’t say anything the other night at dinner. You just surprised me.”
“Like your wedding surprised me,” Dee shot back. “Or the fact that you quit your job and never mentioned it.”
“Oh boy,” Aiden muttered. “Here we go.”
It was my turn to gape.
Holy shit. I was beginning to be sorry I said anything.
Cami flung down her napkin. “Excuse me.”
She hurried away, and after a few seconds, Dee followed her.
Aiden glared at me. “Nice.”
“All I said was we are dating—I mean, in a relationship!”
Bentley sighed. “I think you’ve been taking tact lessons from Aiden. You should have done that in private.”
I jerked my head toward Aiden. “Like those two did when they announced to the table they got married? Fuck that. Dee and I are adults. If we want to see each other, we will.” I yanked on my hair. “You’ve all been pushing it anyway. What’s the goddamn problem?”
Now Bentley glared at me. “Don’t bitch at me because you screwed this up.”
Aiden nodded, seeming pleased. “Yeah.”
Bentley snapped his head in Aiden’s direction. “You zip it.”
Emmy stood, slamming her hand on the table, startling us. “Shut up, all of you!”
We stared at her.
“If you don’t understand this, let me explain. What happened has been simmering since you and Cami got married, Aiden. Whether she admits it or not, Dee was hurt. So was I. We would have loved to be involved in your wedding.” She redirected her gaze to me. “So your little announcement, Maddox, brought it to a head. Finally. Now, I am going to go and make sure they work this out once and for all.” She stalked away, turning at the foot of the stairs. “And for ruining brunch, you three are doing the cleanup and dishes. So get to it.”
Aiden huffed. “Way to go. I’m still hungry.”
“You’re always fucking hungry,” Bentley growled.
“Bottomless pit,” I added, looking at the dishes. There were a lot of them.
“I had nothing to do with the situation, and I still got in trouble. Thanks, Maddox,” Bentley snapped.
“Happy to have included you in the debacle.”
“Shut up, both of you.” Aiden shook his head, reaching for the platter of pancakes. “I’m eating first, then cleaning.”
I looked at my half-eaten plate. “Good idea. Maybe we should cover the girls’ plates, and they can warm them or something.”
Aiden looked over his shoulder. “Do you think they’re figh
ting?”
“Talking,” Bentley said. “They talk.” He sighed. “They talk a lot.”
“I hope Cami is okay,” Aiden said with a groan. “If I have to beat you for this, Mad Dog, I will—but I’ll try to be gentle.”
“Whatever,” I snorted. “I can take you, big man.”
“You think so? I could snap you like a twig.”
“I’ll throw a couple of lemon Danish at you and run. You’ll be so busy trying to catch them, I’ll be fine.”
He frowned and started to laugh. “That would work.”
We all chuckled. Aiden started eating, and with a shrug, I joined him. The food was too good to waste. When we were done, I laid down my fork.
“I didn’t mean to start anything. I just wanted it out there before Dee changed her mind.”
“What do you mean?”
I wiped my mouth. “Let’s say Dee isn’t as far into this relationship as I am and leave it at that. I’m trying to be patient.” I slouched in my chair. “I need you two to be supportive.”
Bentley rested his elbows on the table, studying me. “Are you serious about this relationship?”
“As a heart attack.”
“And Dee is . . .”
“Skittish, to say the least.”
“Okay.”
Aiden frowned. “Are you forcing her into something? As her brother-in-law, I think I need to stop you.”
“You really think I could force Dee into anything? All I’ve done is move us along a bit. Once she is comfortable with us being a couple, we’ll go from there.”
“Do you ever do anything like a normal person?” Aiden huffed.
“Like you, you mean? Push the woman I love away, then turn around and marry her on a whim? Yeah, so normal.”
Aiden and Bentley gaped at me, making me realize what I had said.
“You love her? I thought you didn’t believe in love.”
I shifted in my chair. “Well, I’d never met Dee.”
Bentley smiled. “Maddox, that’s great. I’m happy for you.”
“Don’t be too happy yet. I have to convince the lady.”
“You will.”
Aiden grunted. “You hurt her, I will hurt you. She’s my family.”
I met his gaze, serious. “If I hurt her, I’ll let you. She’s everything to me.”
Maddox ~ Melanie Moreland Page 7
