What?
The breath snagged in Sebastian’s throat. Mom. All these years he’d believed his mother had left him behind. All these years he’d believed she hadn’t loved him. That she hadn’t wanted him. That he wasn’t even loveable.
Was she really dead?
He wheezed in and out several times, trying to breathe. Could it be true? Could she truly be dead?
His heart caved in.
Oh Mom. I’m so sorry. I thought you didn’t want me, that you didn’t love me.
Sebastian drew in a sharp breath. He lifted his gaze to the despicable man who’d sired him. “Why is she buried there? What did you do to her?”
Travis’s face scrunched into a sneer. “You still don’t get it, do you? Stupid boy. Since the moment you were born, you ruined my life. You stole the woman I loved, turned her against me. After you were born, all she cared about was you. Oh, look at the cute little baby. Ain’t he just so precious?” he mocked. “She stopped sleeping in my bed, stopped cooking my meals. All she wanted to do was be around sweet little Sebastian. All of a sudden she thought I needed to be a better man, that I needed to set a good example for our son. She decided I wasn’t good enough for you. Or her. When I refused to change my ways, she announced she was fixing to leave and taking you with her. Stupid bitch. I stopped her that night. I had to. She wasn’t leaving me. She belonged with me. I was her old man.”
Sebastian fought back the darkness raging inside him. His father blamed him for his mother wanting to leave? Seriously? Didn’t Travis understand she probably hadn’t been able to deal with his drunken rages or his pathetic gambling anymore?
“How did you kill her?” Ignoring the gun Tom pointed at his head, Sebastian glared across the overgrown lawn at his father. “How, you son-of-a-bitch?”
His father blanched. A wild look came into his eyes. “It was…an accident. I didn’t mean to do it. We got into an argument. She said she was leaving me and taking you with her. She kept screaming at me in that high-pitched voice, so I wrapped my hands around her neck and squeezed, trying to get her to shut up. Her face turned purple and she went limp. I let go of her and she plopped to the floor. I didn’t mean to kill her. I just…lost it. She pissed me off so bad I couldn’t control myself. She wasn’t supposed to die. Not her. It should have been you. If you hadn’t been born, it wouldn’t have happened. None of this would have happened.”
Sebastian’s blood turned to ice. The demons screamed for release within him, pounding against his chest, straining to break free. His father had murdered his mother. Strangled her. Because she’d been trying to leave him. Sebastian’s stomach twisted in revulsion. He should be surprised, but he wasn’t. Just sickened.
It should have been you.
If you hadn’t been born, it wouldn’t have happened.
Now he finally understood why his father hated him so much. Travis had hated Sebastian since birth. He blamed Sebastian for everything.
Oh Mom. I’m so sorry. I should have known you would never leave me.
Travis’s eyes hardened. “You see, boy? You stole the woman I love. So now I’ve stolen the woman you love. And she’s going to join your momma down there in the ground. It’s only fair after what you did to me. An eye for an eye and all that shit. Only then will we be even.”
In a quick move that Sebastian didn’t see coming, Emily thrust her elbow backward toward Travis’s head, using one of the defensive moves Sebastian had taught her. Her elbow struck Travis just beneath the ear. Travis let out a startled grunt and stepped back, letting her go.
Perfect hit, Emily.
Pride swelled in Sebastian. She was so brave, taking on his father like that.
She spun around and kicked out at Travis with her left foot.
Travis easily caught her by the ankle and twisted, knocking her off her feet.
Emily cried out as she fell headfirst into the black hole.
The breath whooshed out of Sebastian’s lungs as she disappeared over the edge.
A soft thud floated up from the dirt.
Then silence.
Sebastian’s heart seized. He sucked in air, trying to breathe. Was she okay? Had she just had the wind knocked out of her or had she snapped her neck in the fall? Oh God, was she even alive? He was too far away from the hole to see how deep it was. He stared at the hole, waiting, hoping she’d climb back out, but he detected no movement inside.
Please God, if you’re real, let her be okay. Please. That’s all I ask.
Tom lifted the gun higher, pointing it at Sebastian’s head. Chris and Marty came to stand behind Sebastian with their guns drawn, their flashlights pointing in his face, blinding him. Sebastian looked at the ground, at their feet, estimating the distance between him and the three thugs. Tom was within striking distance. A little closer and Chris and Marty would be too. He had to time this just right.
Travis snickered. “Don’t worry. She ain’t dead yet. I can see her moving down there. That’s your final job. To finish her off. Then we’ll be even and I can wash my hands of you.”
Sebastian tried not think about Emily lying in that black hole. He jerked his gaze back to his father. “My final job? Meaning once I kill her, I’ll be free of you forever? You’ll go away and leave me alone? Never bother me again?” He let out a bitter laugh. “Do you really think I’m going to let you walk away after this?”
Out of the corner of his eye, Sebastian detected movement out on the dark road just barely within his peripheral vision. A vehicle crawling down the lane with its lights off. So slowly he barely noticed. A second vehicle followed closely behind the first. Then a third.
His heart rate sped up. Who was out there? Had his father sent reinforcements in case he got out of control? Was Travis afraid he couldn’t take Sebastian down with three men and needed more?
Sebastian couldn’t wait around to find out.
He needed to strike now or he would lose his chance.
CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO
“Come closer, boy.” Travis motioned Sebastian forward with his flashlight. “Time to finish her off.” He glanced at Marty. “Get her out of the hole. Sebastian’s going to kill her the same way I killed his momma. By strangulation.”
The hell I am.
Marty leaned over the edge of the hole, reaching down.
Sebastian spun around, kicked out at Chris’s gun with his right foot, knocking the gun aside. In the same move, he continued spinning until he came back around and slammed his hand into Tom’s throat and kicked his gun aside at the same time. Tom squealed, clutching at his throat, while Chris lunged for his fallen gun. Both flashlights crashed to the ground.
A car door closed somewhere in the distance, faint, barely discernable. But Sebastian was too focused on his opponents to worry about what might be coming from the road.
“I got her.” Marty pulled a struggling Emily from the hole.
“Let go of me!” Emily plunged her fingers into Marty’s eye sockets the way Sebastian had taught her, gouging his eyes. Marty howled and released her, jerking back.
She tumbled back into the hole.
Chris rose with his gun, pointing it at Sebastian. His flashlight lay on the ground, shining a small beam toward the hole where Emily had fallen. Sebastian kicked out at him again, knocking the gun aside and snapping several of the man’s fingers in the process. Chris moaned and cradled his injured hand. Tom still clutched his throat, eyeing Sebastian warily, but made no move to rejoin the fight. Tom’s flashlight lay on its head at his feet, its light snuffed out by the grass.
Just as I thought. They’re just hired guns. Not fighters.
Sebastian faced his father.
Travis sneered at Sebastian, lifting his flashlight and shining it in Sebastian’s face. “Looks like it’s just you and me now, boy. Come and get me.”
Blinded by the light, Sebastian narrowed his eyes, trying to see Travis around the bright beam.
The screen door squeaked, slamming against the metal frame. The wind? Or ha
d someone come out the back door?
Sebastian lunged at his father, slamming into Travis’s thighs. Travis let out a grunt and fell backwards with Sebastian on top of him. The flashlight sailed through the air and thudded in the grass, then rolled into the hole with Emily.
An intense hatred consumed Sebastian, overwhelming him with its heat.
Set the emotions free. Let the memories loose.
He’d put up with his father’s cruelty for too long. He’d been a cold, empty, unfeeling shell for too many years. If it weren’t for Emily, he would still be a cold, empty shell.
Emily was right.
They rolled across the dark ground, grappling, twisting, squirming, each trying to gain the upper hand.
Sebastian didn’t need to shut his emotions off to win this war. Not anymore. He needed to set those emotions free. Let the hatred go. Turn the demons loose. Let the memories consume him.
“Momma? Momma, where are you?” Sebastian turned in a complete circle, but Mom wasn’t there. She was always in the kitchen in the morning, making breakfast. Where was she?
His father chuckled from the living room where he’d obviously fallen asleep in his chair the night before. An empty Jim Beam bottle sat on the end table next to his father’s chair. The stench of whiskey and unwashed body reached Sebastian’s nostrils as his father turned to face him. Sebastian wrinkled his nose.
“She left, don’t you know? She ain’t coming back. You ran her off, boy. Now your momma’s gone. It just you and me now.”
“No! She wouldn’t leave me! She wouldn’t!” Sebastian’s heart squeezed. She wouldn’t leave him. She wouldn’t. He knew she wouldn’t.
“She did, boy. She left you. She didn’t love you. She’s gone.”
She’s gone…
Travis’s elbow shot up, thwacking Sebastian in the ribs. Sebastian jerked back at the pain, hissing out a breath.
His father rolled free, scrambled to his feet.
Sebastian rose on unsteady legs. All the emotions he’d fought so hard to ignore for so long came back in a suffocating rush. He didn’t fight them. He let all the long-suppressed feelings swirl inside him, the fear, the confusion, the hatred, the disbelief, the overwhelming grief at the loss of his mother, the feelings of being unwanted and unloved pushed free, rising up and twisting away like a raging tornado. Sebastian gasped, stumbling back, as he set them all free, turning all the emotions loose. And finally let himself feel.
The demons slithered loose, swirling away.
Then everything was gone.
Including the hatred.
Something fluttered softly in his chest. It slowly warmed, strengthened, spreading outward, heating his icy limbs, thawing his cold heart. He’d been fighting it back, trying to deny it, ever since Emily had come into his life. The “L” word.
Love.
He loved her.
And it was about damn time he admitted that to himself.
He had to get Emily out of the hole. And tell her he loved her.
As soon as he killed his father.
The air changed around them, hinting at the presence of other bodies moving silently across the dark yard. Whoever had arrived was rapidly approaching. Sebastian’s eyes were adjusting to the darkness now as he glanced warily around. He detected the movements of men slinking around the house and heading toward them. What the hell was going on?
And then it hit him.
Craig.
Craig must have followed them from the airport and figured out where they were going, or had his team watching Travis’s house. Or both. Craig was smart. Sebastian should have known Craig wouldn’t let him do this alone.
The movement Sebastian had thought he’d seen in the house earlier had probably been one of Craig’s men.
Or maybe even Craig himself.
Relief swept through Sebastian. He wasn’t in this alone. Craig had come through.
Even though Sebastian had deserted him in L.A.
He owed Craig an apology.
Travis lunged at Sebastian, taking advantage of his distraction, and knocked him backward. They hit the wet ground with a soft thud. Mud sloshed as Travis shoved Sebastian’s face back into the pile of wet dirt, his hands wrapping around Sebastian’s throat, as he tried to smother him.
His own father was trying to kill him. His own father who had hated him since birth.
No, don’t think of him as your father. He’s the enemy. Just another opponent. An evil opponent.
I can’t kill an opponent. I’m not a murderer.
He’s a monster. He murdered Mom. Kill the bastard.
Sebastian struggled against the thoughts tormenting him while he fought to be free of his father’s hold.
I have to kill him or I’ll never be free.
Travis would not win this war.
Sebastian gagged as the mud sucked him in, seeping over his face. He reached up, blindly grabbing Travis’s throat and trying to push him back.
A soft gasp came from the hole. A flashlight beam landed on them. Then Emily’s voice.
“Let go of him, you asshole!”
Sebastian managed to grab a hold of Travis’s ears. He pulled and twisted Travis’s ears until Travis yelped and jerked back, releasing Sebastian. Sebastian wiped mud out of his face and lunged to his feet.
Emily’s hand came over the rim of the hole. She shined the light on Travis. Latching onto Travis’s ankle, she yanked, trying to pull him off balance. Travis let out a snarl and kicked out at her, his foot connecting with her chin. She cried out and tumbled back into the hole.
You bastard! I’m going to kill you!
Sebastian tackled Travis with a roar. They hit the ground, rolling and squirming across the wet grass. Travis latched onto Sebastian’s ankle and yanked his foot back with a savagery that made something pop and wrench loose in his foot.
Sebastian bit back a scream, fighting against the pain.
He crawled across his father, ignoring the throbbing in his ankle, and wrapped an arm around Travis’s neck.
Travis’s squirmed, but Sebastian wasn’t letting go.
He locked his father in a chokehold.
He squeezed.
Travis gagged.
Sebastian squeezed harder.
Son-of-a-bitch was going to die for what he’d done.
He killed Mom. He killed Spot. He killed Margie.
He took everything I ever loved away from me.
He abducted Cole. My son.
He hurt Emily. The woman I love.
Die!
Die!
He squeezed harder. Harder.
Travis flailed, trying to yank Sebastian’s arm away.
You’re not a murderer, Sebastian. Stop.
Yes I am. I’m going to kill him. He deserves to die.
“Sebastian!”
Craig’s voice came from somewhere behind him.
Several vehicle lights flicked on, lighting the yard.
Sebastian blinked as men surrounded him, guns drawn.
FBI.
Was that Nick Miller in the group?
Chris, Tom and Marty had all been apprehended. They sat in a row across the yard, handcuffed and looking miserable as a cop stood guard over them.
Sebastian looked away.
He refused to let go. Travis needed to pay for what he’d done. Craig could deal with the others, but Sebastian was dealing with his father.
“Sebastian!” Craig’s voice again, closer. He stepped around in front of Sebastian. Sebastian stared at Craig’s tan dress slacks that were caked with mud. “You don’t want to do this. Let him go. It’s not worth it. You don’t want to go back to prison.” He gentled his voice. “Come on, man. Just let him go.”
Sebastian gasped in a breath. “No. He has to die.”
“Sebastian?” Emily touched his arm. “I’m okay. Please. Let him go. Don’t do this.”
Travis stopped flailing and went limp. Still Sebastian held on.
“Please Sebastian,” Emily begged. Her
hand tightened around his arm. “He’s not worth it. You’re not a killer.”
He jerked his gaze to where Emily knelt beside him. Her hair was a tangled mess, her face smudged with dirt, her cheeks streaked with fresh tears. She was so beautiful.
“Sebastian,” she whispered. She cupped his cheek in her hand. “Let him go.”
Sebastian squeezed his eyes shut.
I’m not a killer. I’m better than him.
Yes, you are. You killed a boy.
That was an accident. I didn’t mean to.
The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.
You’ll always be a piece of shit. Don’t forget your roots.
It doesn’t matter how far you run, you’ll always be his son.
No! I’m not a killer.
I’m not a killer.
Just let it go.
Let it all go.
Sebastian released his father and fell back into the mud, breathing heavily. Emily let out a sob and threw her arms around him, squeezing him against her.
He gasped, drawing her close, and held on tight.
Love consumed him, overwhelmed him. That’s what this was, this wonderful feeling in his chest: love. He loved her. Why had it taken him so long to admit that?
“Em.” He brushed her hair behind her ear. “You fixed me. You did it.”
She let out a soft laugh and cupped his face in her hands. “No, you fixed you.”
“It was you all along,” he whispered. He hitched in a breath, his chest expanding with the unfamiliar emotion. “I love you.” He kissed her, cupping her cheek and devouring her mouth, never wanting to let her go.
She kissed him back. Hungrily. He felt the love pouring out of her. She’d saved him. She’d fixed him. Emily.
Finally he drew back and looked into her eyes. “I love you. I think…I did from the very start, I just didn’t know what love was. I was so confused about what was happening to me. You made me feel. You made me believe in myself.”
She smiled, her eyes brimming with tears. “I’m glad. I love you, Sebastian.”
He kissed her again, unable to help himself. He couldn’t stop touching her. “I love you,” he said again. “God, I love you.” So fucking much.
Scarred (Unlikely Heroes Book 5) Page 30
