That lack of food might mean someone starves in the next four or five months. I’m seriously debating in the back of my head that we need to make an example out of this person. Assuming we can even pin the tail on the fucktard. I asked Jenna to search campus for folks who have porked up, and she found no one. Everyone is holding on pretty much to the same weight. Of course that tells me that whoever is stealing the food is not eating it, they’re simply hoarding it somewhere. Maybe someone is planning on leaving?
Hm. Disturbing thought there. I wonder if someone is planning on leaving here with a giant truck filled with all our most delicious foods.
Ooooh… that gets my shit ALL riled up. Makes me want to punch babies, and God save me, we have babies here to punch now.
Funny how small a thing can disrupt life now. I’m pissed over missing Root Beer and cookies. Ready to put barrel to forehead with the intent to kill…
I need to reevaluate this. Murder can’t be the solution, even to prove a point. I can see something dangerous like if someone were to kill one of us, that would be worth killing over I think. But stealing food… Nope, not yet. I’m not that angry, or that desperate.
Yet.
Andy arrived late this morning with a small group of folks from the Factory. That marked the first time they’d ever visited here, and they were suitably impressed. Mike and Patty gave them the nickel tour, and showed them the basic layout of the place but didn’t give them a huge intel filled tour. On the outside chance they are devious, dastardly people, we didn’t want them knowing where all the honey holes were here. Give them no idea where the big folks sleep at night, or where we store our food or guns, or gasoline.
None of us had the impression they were scouting. Andy did a pretty thorough security screening for us though, and marked a few spots where we NEEDED cameras. (according to his fears, I’d imagine) Of course he also said we could move the cameras as needed.
Apparently he can set them up to be powered with solar cells, and/or rechargeable batteries that we’ll need to swap out every so often. He said periodically we'd need to climb up with a ladder and clean the lenses and make sure the spider webs weren't gunking shit up, but that's cake. Nothing much required for maintenance. The toughest part of all of this is actually coming up with the gear. Where are we going to find all the necessary cameras and wiring, and batteries, etc?
Andy said our two best bets were the town municipal station, and the grocery store. Large retailers have tons of cameras, and he can just yank them if we can supply him with some security while he’s doing it. We can also check the pharmacy, and possibly even the atm machines and banks. We’re planning on doing that within days so we can get that ball rolling.
Most of our labor force has been directed towards building the guard towers inside the wall. We spent an entire day cutting down trees and getting fresh lumber made up, and right now the same labor force is working on getting it all cut to size, and put upright. We're running out of dry lumber to use though, so there's bound to be a slowing down in our near future. So far so good. No injuries of note, and we’ve got one tower just about up and ready to go. It is about three stories tall, and right now it only has a ladder for getting to the top, but we’ll be putting stairs and doors on them for faster ascension in the event of an attack on us. Too hard to carry a box of 5.56mm up the ladder while carrying a SAW, as you're getting shot at, or worrying about a massive siege of the dead.
What else? Seems like there should be way more to talk about. I’ve been nose deep in this food inventory thing as well as following Andy around. I like the guy, but let’s be honest, letting anyone new into your home turf is nerve wracking. I just hope he’s on the level with us. I also hope he hasn’t been reached out to by the forces arrayed against us. That’d suck balls.
My brother Caleb and his wife and son are doing well. He had a pretty rough time of it when I was hurt, sitting there watching me slowly waste away, and he's still dealing with that. Sophie said he's been kind of an asshole of late, and I took him to task on that. He got angry at me, and I think when he started to raise his voice, all that was said was said. He shut up, and nodded. Becca is doing great. She struggled to watch me while I was hurt too, but she took it better for whatever reason. She's also working really hard in the gymnasium with Ryan, keeping the hydro operation running at full tilt, which is indispensable, especially in the face of the food shortage we're likely to have.
Did I mention I was super tired? We’re going to do a more thorough search of outlying buildings in a day or two to try and find where this food is being stashed. Despite us still bringing down the occasional deer and turkey, losing all the processed yummies will be a real bitch as we move along. If only for the kids who want a nice sweet snack. I also asked Jenna in the next few days to try and get an assessment of our needs for clothing and bedding as we move into winter. We’re carrying thirteen extra bodies, and even though I know they brought stuff, I want to make sure everyone has blankets and jackets and whatnot.
Headed to bed for the moment. I’m hoping all of the irons in our collective fires develop well. It’d suck balls if it didn’t.
If you’re listening Jinx Fairy… you can go fuck yourself.
-Adrian
December 3rd
Mr. Journal do you remember when I said way back when how amazing it was the amount of work we got done we had all those new extra bodies? I feel like saying the exact same things today. We’re plus thirteen bodies right now, and they’re all hard workers with agendas to get shit done. It is so helpful to have people around that understand the concept of having a “sense of urgency.”
We do not have a lot of time before the serious snow comes, and we have a LOT to accomplish between now and then. For example, we need to get the security system installed, and to do that, we need to accumulate batteries, solar cells, mounts, cameras, computers, wifi gear, laptops, and more. We also need to fabricate boxes to mount them in so the weather doesn’t get to them. Lots to do! That’s just one project.
So Jenna and I did some room searches yesterday, and we found nothing in the dorms that indicated the food had been taken and stashed there. We even checked the outlying buildings fairly well and found nothing. As a side note, the pile or human wreckage out near the old staff housing portion of campus is gross. So many people have been put to rest on that pyre area it makes me queasy. It doesn’t smell bad, and there aren’t like, body parts or anything, but the pile of ash is far too large to be acceptable. It bothers me on a fundamental level.
I just dislike the idea that we’ve had to put that many people to rest.
I guess it shouldn’t surprise me. When the dead are beating down doors to eat you alive, and the living are beating down doors to eat your food or take you as a prisoner, we are going to stack the bodies up. I think in all reality, we’ve been very fortunate that we haven’t lost more.
I found myself very uncomfortable the other day when I had to use my rifle for the first time in since I came out of the coma. I started to tell the story here to you, then immediately let myself get sidetracked because quite honestly, I didn’t want to talk about it. It was easier to just walk away from writing about it than it was to sit there and admit it was shitty for me.
I don’t want to go into all the details, but at one point the other day, I think it was… two days ago, maybe three, Wendy was pulling security at the back gate and she radioed that we had some roamers back there. Kevin and Mike, and all the others were working on the towers, and I was nearby doing shit with Jenna. I said I’d head over because I was close, so I did.
We had five zombies slowly milling about at the rear gate, trying to get inside the facility. They weren’t massed up, or doing anything out of the ordinary, they were just there. Granted, it was odd that they were there in the first place, but honestly, it’s been a weird few years, and I am just running out of give-a-fuck.
So long story short, I line up my first shot, and without thinking too much about it, I squeeze
off the round, and I swear to you it was like I was teleported right back to the moment when I was shot. I could feel the air in the orchard, and the entire experience was relived. I felt my neck turn red hot as the bullet hit me, and I felt the swelling, and the bleeding, and everything. Vividly I remembered becoming weak in the knees, unable to stand, and then hitting the grass, and going limp as I went into this catatonic… shock or whatever. I felt like I was already dead. Like I was watching it happen from above. Fucked up shit.
I froze up at the gate, and it took me a few seconds to shake the bullshit clean to drop the others and even then each shot was a process. I felt… lost, scared, and very new. I could feel Wendy's eyes boring into me, judging me, realizing how weak I was in that moment. Very uncool in many ways Mr. Journal. I haven’t slept well since either. I keep having these weird dreams where I relive the event, and when I go down, clutching at my bleeding neck, I turn around and I watch Chris get shot. It’d be normal, but of course I can’t dream of the living, so I don’t see Abby, or Martin, or any of the people who came to my aid. I see Chris standing there, holding the rifle he shot me with, and then I see him go down. I'm all alone in the dream. No one comes. I stare up at the cold blue sky and wait for the darkness to come.
It’s weird. Not good. Last night was decent, but now I am developing a complex I fear. The next time I need to pull the trigger, will I freeze up? Will I see that moment flash before my eyes again? Will I feel that stabbing pain in the back of my neck once more? Will I pull the trigger in time?
I feel like a liability. I am not sure how to deal with this just yet. Hopefully I have time to sort my head out before I am put to the test. Jinx Fairy, eat my ass.
Sigh. Where was I?
I think Jenna is hitting on me. She flirted with me way back when I was at Westfield trying to meet a girl, and she’s pretty, and kinda funny. Hard worker too. I like working with her. Spending time around her. I haven’t returned any of her advances, and I don’t plan on it. I’ve got to sort me out before I do anything stupid and drag anyone into my drama. I’ve got plenty of that, don’t you know.
Speaking of drama, Mallory is moving to MGR. She didn’t tell me that, I heard it through Abby, who heard it through Doc Lindsey who heard it through… you get the drift. I don’t know what to make of it. I don’t know if I care what to make of it. I know Otis is happier with the bed all to ourselves at night. He’s been snuggling right up to me like the good old days, and he’s sleeping better. I think I am too for that matter. I wonder if I was carrying guilt over being with her? Unconsciously feeling like shit simply because I was with her? More of my drama right there for you.
Hopefully she does well there, and is happy. Happier than I made her at least.
Tomorrow and the next day we are sending out a large crew of people to start searching for and accumulating the supplies to get our camera systems installed. Kevin and Fitz are taking a small group of our better shooters and “operators” out for the run with Andy. We’re going to keep everyone else not already committed to a job on the construction of the towers. We want to get them done fairly quickly. Kevin and Fitz settled on a total of five towers, and as of right now, we’ve got two towers just about finished. The frames are erected, and the floor is installed. We need to finish those first, then we will move on the others. One of the cameras we are planning on installing will be on the underside of the floor on the tower near the main gate, so that was important to get done first. The tower will be right near the back side of Hall A and will have a nice line of sight all the way up the hill on the other side of the bridge. Should be a savage firing position should we need it.
It didn’t take us all that long to get those two towers (Tolkien reference ftw) more or less built, and I think we might need another ten days to get the other three built. With any luck, we’ll have some of the parts for the cameras in hand and assembled within 4 or 5 days, and we’ll be able to watch stuff.
Andy maintains the system he is designing for us will be state of the art, despite the fact that Radio Shack is long since closed. Incidentally, that’s one of the places they are hitting tomorrow. Andy is pretty sure the small Radio Shack here in town will still have all the wiring and many of the parts he needs. Imagine that.
That’d be nice, because I’d love to get this shit done quickly, and with minimal injury, and zero loss of life. This is a nice project, but not one I want to lose people over. Sick of people dying. See: giant funeral pyre.
I have this feeling that things are going to get bad. I don’t know exactly how, or when, but I think this lull in the noise is very much intentional on someone’s part. I think the good guy, or the bad guy is pulling strings for unknown reasons, and that is almost never good. I think when the good guy pulls strings he’s just buying us time to get our shit together for when the bad guy has his shit rallied and on point.
And well, we already know what happens when the bad guy gets his shit together. Let us not forget that all three of us are here now, and even though we have no idea what we’re doing, or what to do next, we know badness is not far away. I suspect we're nearing the endgame.
So yeah, major trips downtown the next few days. Not much here. I am doing more food inventory crap with Jenna, and she’s searching for clothes and blankets like I said. Ollie and Melissa are well, as is their baby. Fairly quiet, which I don’t like one bit.
I want to get to the bottom of this missing food. I want to find out what’s up.
I want to stop being scared.
-Adrian
December 5th
I hate being cooped up here on campus waiting for my friends to return from dangerous outside the walls missions. It bugs the fuck out of me. Makes my anxiety considerably worse.
I have been exercising and healing and doing all the things Ethan and Roger have been telling me to, but I feel like the healing is taking forever. I know it isn’t, but every time I watch all these guys and gals slap a fresh magazine into their weapons, and chamber a round, my heart skips a beat. I feel the anxiety of the danger they might be going into, and I feel the worry that I can’t be there with them, that I am failing them and worst of all, I am jealous.
Yeah I said it. Jealous. Jealous like a 15 year old girl watching her 16 year old friend walk away with the starting quarterback. I so desperately want that adrenaline rush with my friends. My days are filled with tedium, and soreness, and sweat, and frustration over not being able to help as much as I want, and not being able to track down the missing food or whoever the fuck stole it. Plus I feel like we have so much happening here on campus, and we’re all struggling desperately to get things done, we’re skipping out on conversations we should be having, and cutting corners to get through this coming winter. I’m feeling a lot of frustration at this moment.
We got a little bit of cold, damp rain today too, and the bite wound on my leg, the three scars on my arm, as well as the incision in my neck are sore. I hope those wounds aren’t going to hurt every time weather like this happens, because that would blow. Sick of this shit.
Enough bitching. If I don’t drop my sack I’ll get pushed down the drain by a giant cosmic fucking toe.
What’s new? Ah, yes. Runs downtown. The ones I wish I was going on. So far, so good. I don’t have all the details because they have been out the gate early, and arriving back very late. In fact, the first night they were out they simply stayed at the Factory and never returned at all. It left us fairly low here on bodies for security, but in all actuality, we had more folks than we ever used to, so it was a wash. We’re just spoiled by how many available bodies we have on hand now.
I had about ten minutes with Fitz this evening as he drank a cup of coffee with me outside. Fitz is Kevin's right hand man. Fitz takes evening walks very regularly, and I think I can check in with him if I want to. I just need to time it right. I like chatting with him. He’s like an older brother. Well, another older brother. Caleb has been busy with the towers the past week or so, and I haven’t seen hi
m aside from bumping into him in the hallway here in the Hall. Funny how that works. He moves here, almost dies, kind of saves my life, and now I never see the guy.
I also never see Becca. She’s always busy working the hydroponics shit with Ryan. She looks happy when I see her, and I know Ryan is cranking out the veggies for us, so once again that’s just me feeling butthurt. I’m such a pussy.
Fitz said that the first night’s progress was stellar. The Radio Shack they hit had been basically left untouched, and the undead in the area were thin enough that they were able to handle them with the suppressed M9s, and with halligans. At no point were they in any real danger, other than the occasional shambling dead moron.
Amusing to me how different my accounts of danger are now. Remember back when dealing with a single zombie was like, an epic occurrence? I’d write an entire page on how I dealt with it, like I was a martial artist detailing the necessary moves to win a trophy or something. Now it takes a half dozen undead in a weird place doing strange things to even warrant a sentence or two. Priorities.
Anesthetized to the situation are we? I’m sure part of it is the fact that we are so proficient at killing them now we aren’t getting into such nasty situations. It also helps that we do nothing alone, unlike my first months. I had to do everything with no backup, and that’s so much more frightening and nerve wracking. Now we’ve got a minimum of six bodies moving at any given time, plenty of medical expertise all over the group, and a theoretical abundance of ammunition and weapons.
It’s like a walk in the park.
Fitz said we have enough wiring, laptops, and wifi shit to set up all the cameras. They hit the police station today as well as the pharmacy and the bank, and with all that in hand we are pretty much set. He said we are still a few cameras short of our basic needs for Bastion here, and we still need the cameras for MGR as well. Tomorrow they are going to the grocery store to remove the cameras there, and if they can salvage all of them, we should be all set. After that it’ll just be building the boxes and getting them mounted as needed. Martin got yanked from tower work today to start on the boxes, and I guess he’ll be done with that in a couple days at most.
Adrian's Undead Diary (Book 7): The Trinity Page 29
