He kept our lips sealed together as he eased in then out over and over. There was a burning stretching feeling as his strokes widened me in preparation for his whole length.
He went slow at first, butting against the thin membrane time and again like a battering ram weakening a door to force it open.
“Hold on little one.” He reared back and slammed into me with such force the bed knocked against the wall.
I couldn’t contain my cry of pain when he surged into me. He didn’t say anything, just held still until I adjusted to having him buried so deep inside me. His hands soothed and calmed me with the lightest of touches as he kissed from the corner of my lips up to my eyes and ears.
“It’s over now butterfly, shh.” I didn’t realize I had been crying until he sipped the fallen tears from my cheek. It was so unlike him, this gentle tender side that it only made the tears come harder.
He held my head in his hands, tasting my lips as he held his body still. The pain eased and my body relaxed beneath his. “Better?” I nodded yes and waited for what came next. He moved slowly, but his size still made it just a tad uncomfortable, until he twisted his hips and the pressure eased. With the pain abated, that sweet feeling began to grow again.
I could feel something growing inside, that throbbing I’d felt when his tongue was inside me, only different, better. I moved with him, following his lead until the pain was forgotten and all I wanted was that pleasure that I knew was just within reach.
I arched beneath him and his teeth bit into my nipple hard enough that I felt the pull between my thighs. Yes, I’m there, please, please, please.
Then he started to move faster, went deeper and stars burst into full color behind my closed eyes.
“Open your eyes.” They flew open and right onto his. My face went up in flames as he moved in and out of me never losing eye contact. What was he seeing? What was he thinking? There was no sound but our elevated breaths and that squishing sound that my body couldn’t seem to quit. He stared down into my eyes as he took me with slow, steady even strokes and I couldn’t look away.
A light came into his eyes, a glow that hadn’t been there before. Did that mean he was enjoying it? How was I to know if he was pleased with me if he never made a sound during intercourse? I thought sex was a noisy, sweaty mess that left you breathless and mindless at once?
I had the breathless and mindless part down, but what about him? I soon lost all thought as he shifted his body to a different angle and rubbed against something hidden deep inside me.
Not fair! How could he expect me to stay quiet when he did things like this? If that wasn’t bad enough, he lowered his head and took my swollen nipple into his mouth again, this time swirling his tongue around it before suckling with just enough force to send electric pleasure shooting through my body.
His thrust went from hard and deep to slow and sweet and back again and I lost all thought as I chased the unfurling sweetness in the pit of my gut again.
“That’s my good girl. I can feel your pussy sucking me in. That’s it, cum for me butterfly, let go.” As if waiting for his permission my body shook in the most spectacular way with sensations that made me both afraid and ecstatic. These were stronger, sharper than the others. It felt almost like I would die, like I would go up in flames.
I tasted blood on my tongue from where I’d bit into my lip too hard. He licked the speck of blood away before feeding me his tongue. I sucked on it like a life saver as he pounded into me harder than before.
I knew he was reaching climax because of his hurried movements but that was the only thing that gave it away. That and the way he threw his head back and gritted his teeth as if he were in pain. He was beautiful in his release. In that one moment of exposed vulnerability I saw so much.
My heart squeezed with love and emotion as I watched this beautiful man get lost in me. I watched as he came down, his body suffering aftershocks of the most delightful kind that set off little sparks of my own.
Chapter 7
***
That was our beautiful beginning and from then ‘til now I never questioned that he found something more in me than in all the others. It was never anything he said, that had never changed. He was still as tight lipped as he ever was.
But it was in the small things. Like the way he touched me out of the blue sometimes, as if he couldn’t help himself. Or the way he’d pull me into his office under the pretense of dictating something only to take me up against the wall or across his desk.
He’d never spent the night, not even that first time, and the one time I’d fallen asleep from sheer exhaustion after spending the whole night coupled with him, I’d awakened to find him gone, the place next to me cold.
Now he was gone, and so was she. It could only mean one thing. They were off somewhere together. Was he making love to her now? Would she be the one to finally melt that cold heart of his? Be the next Jonas Harp?
The pain was too much to bear and I almost buckled under it. As usual I didn’t know what to do. I’d never suffered heartache of his magnitude. Yes I’ve suffered loss before, but nothing had ever hurt like this.
I roamed the house like a trapped animal sick of my own thoughts. For the first time since falling in love with him, I felt real defiance. I’d never even entertained the idea of disobeying him, not once, but now my anger was such that I didn’t care. He was gone anyway so whatever we had before, was null and void.
I grabbed my purse and threw on an old pair of jeans and a halter top that I hadn’t worn in forever, and headed back out the door.
I drove to a little bistro not far from the house. I could do with a glass of wine now, but with the baby I daren’t risk it. Instead, I ordered a French onion soup starter and a greasy cheese burger and fries.
For some reason my anger seems to have fueled my hunger, either that or the child in my womb was demanding to be fed. The baby! What am I going to do about the baby? I no longer cared to tell her no good sperm donor about her existence; he could rot for all I care.
I tore the bread in the basket they’d placed on the table to shreds imagining I was tearing into Jonas Harp’s hide. I sat there in contemplation trying to come up with the best plan of action.
Should I pack my bags and leave without seeing him again? Should I for once take the initiative and make the first move? It’s what any self respecting woman would do. But as mad as I was, the thought of never seeing him again cut to the core. And what if I was wrong?
No, no I’m not. I’m sure I’m right. It had all the earmarks of his MO. But to do it in front of me, to give me no warning. Was he planning to throw me out like garbage? Was he going to put her in my home, in my bed?
Were they laughing at me? Sneering behind my back? I tried to remember if she’d ever seen anything happen between us that would make her suspicious of our true relationship, but drew a blank. What about the others? Had the ladies in the secretary pool guessed at his real reason for hiring me as his assistant? Not that I could continue working there at the firm after this. But having anyone else know of my stupidity was not something I could endure.
I’ll leave town. That’s it. I’ll start over somewhere else. I’m young and able. There’s no reason I can’t make it on my own, I’ve done it before. It was a good thought but a scary one, especially with a baby on the way. Obviously, I couldn’t tell him about the baby. What if he insisted I get rid of it?
Then came the memories. Flooding my mind like a movie reel. All those times I’d seen a small glimpse of the man beneath the hard shell. Those times I’d secretly watched him and seen a different side to him.
Not just with sex. There were times when I’d catch him watching me, just staring as if trying to see into me. And then they were the times when I’d feel the change in his touch.
I picked at my food when it came with my mind drifting. I knew what I needed to do. All I needed was the strength to do it.
***
“Where the hell have you been?” I al
most jumped out of my skin. I’d walked into the house and was reaching for the light switch when his voice came out of the darkness.
I adjusted my eyes with my hand still outstretched and found him sitting in a corner of the room. Everything I’d told myself, all the plans I’d been making in the last few hours flew out the window. He was here.
“I…” He left his seat and made his way to me, stopping mere inches away from me. I saw anger in his eyes as he glared down at me.
“I asked you a question.” It was the first time I’d seen his anger turned against me. When his hand came up and around my neck I swallowed hard and looked for an escape.
“I went out to dinner.” I barely got the words out around the lump in my throat. “With who?” What? Was he on something? Who could I have gone out with? He’d kept me isolated from everyone these last few months. He looked down at my clothes with a sneer.
“With no one, I was alone.” My voice was tinny and weak with uncertainty. I’d never seen this side of him before.
“Don’t lie to me.” He shook me but even now he was careful not to hurt me. “I’m not lying I promise.” He studied me for the longest time and it was then I realized how uneven his breathing was.
The hand around my throat had a slight tremble to it, but that could be repressed anger and not the fear I saw mixed with that anger in his eyes.
“You broke the rules, you weren’t my good girl. Now I have to punish you.” My eyes widened at his words and I wrenched myself away and turned to run. It was pointless; he caught me in three steps or less.
“Come here, where are you going?” He dragged me to the bedroom kicking and screaming and over to the bed. “Quiet.” I stuttered to silence and recoiled from the venomous look in his eyes. He went back to being Mr. Silent as he walked around the room with my eyes following his every move.
I sat because my legs were about to give out on me. Where were all those words I said I was going to throw at his head? Where was that rage that had got me through the day? All gone.
He dragged his tie from around his neck before moving to the closet. What was he doing in there? I didn’t understand why he was carrying my silk scarves when he came back into the room, but I wised up real quick when he grabbed my hands and wrapped his tie around them.
Too late, I should’ve ran while he was in the closet but I feared what he would do if I tried. This was not a man you disobeyed on a good day, and in this mood I had no idea what to expect.
“What are you going to do?” I was just a little bit more afraid when he didn’t answer. This silence wasn’t like the others. There was an underlying menace that did not bode well for yours truly.
He tore my shirt in half and tossed it across the room before attacking my jeans my and ordering me to step out of them. I did it in mute fear. As soon as I was naked he pulled me around to face him and took my face in his hand roughly.
I waited for him to say something but he just looked at me as if he were giving himself time to calm down. Once it seemed like he had himself back under control, he pushed me back onto the bed and positioned me so that my head was nearly touching the headboard.
There was a wild tic in his jaw as he used one of my scarves to tie my bound hands to a rung in the head of the bed.
Next he moved onto my feet. By the time he was done, I was left spread eagle on the bed with my legs spread open wide and my arms bound together over my head. I watched him as he stood up from the bed and removed the rest of his clothes
He was hard, very hard, and boy was he angry. It was evident in the way he moved. His eyes when he climbed over my body was dark. I jumped when he lowered his head and placed a kiss over my navel. Oh, okay. I started to relax when I thought this was all he would do. But why did he call it punishment? Or will that come later?
He worked his way down my body with his mouth and fingers bringing me to fever pitch and then pulling back each time. I wanted to beg him for release, but that training kicked in and I endured his torment.
I wasn’t expecting it when his mouth was suddenly gone and I felt him shove into my body. There was none of his usual finesse as he took me roughly. My body responded as it always did. I was at the brink in seconds but once again he stopped. Frustration wracked my body as I tried to reach orgasm on my own, moving on and off the hard flesh that speared my body.
His hand came back around my neck. “Stop.” I stopped immediately and stared into his furious eyes. He started moving again, his finger finding my clit and pressing down. The fever built again and again he stopped.
My body was in agony. I needed release, needed to relieve the pressure that was like a time bomb ready to detonate. He got to work on my nipples next, biting them just a little harder than the norm and fire shot through my veins and settled between my thighs.
“Please.” I couldn’t take it anymore. Even if he raged at me for breaking the rules, I was willing to take that risk. “Shut up.” He dropped my nipple long enough to bark at me before going back to his sweet torture.
He pulled out of my body and rubbed the engorged head of his cock along my clit and back over and over until I thought I would go mad. Put it back in. I screamed the words in my head and tried enticing him with the movements of my hips, but it was as if he weren’t there.
I noticed then how detached he was from the moment, how methodical everything he did was. What was he up to? I soon found out when he drove himself back inside me and pounded himself in and out until I reached the pinnacle, only to be dragged back to earth when he pulled out for the last time.
It’s what he did next though that left me cold. What finally brought understanding. With his eyes on mine, he stroked his seed out on the sheet between my thighs. I don’t know why the act hurt as much as it did. He’d never denied me his seed. It was the one part of himself he’d always shared with me.
He got off the bed leaving me tied up there and even through the coldness that came with his act, my body was still in need. I heard him moving around in the other room as the tears started.
He repeated the act all throughout the night. The first time he’d spent the whole night in my bed and it was sheer torture. Each time he’d bring me close and as mad as I was at him, he was still able to get my body to respond to his touch.
I was tired and achy by the time he turned away from me for the last time. Nothing had been said between us in all those hours and that didn’t change when he leaned over me when he was done and inserted what looked like round silver beads inside me. “These stay. They better be there when I take you tonight.” With that he
got dressed and untied me, before walking out of the room and the house.
Chapter 8
***
I got up from the bed on shaky legs and worked the kinks out of my limbs. Now I understood the significance of the beads. Oh no, I can’t walk around like this all day. The sweet pain between my thighs only intensified with each step I took. Every movement sent shockwaves through my system. It was diabolical even for him to do this to me.
I took a hot shower and tried to ease the ache between my thighs but it was no use. I needed him. Damn him.
He hadn’t said anything about work and with everything being so confusing I thought it best to go in until I had a better handle on things. How would he be? Would he even be there? Everything came rushing back to me from the day before.
All the questions and fears that had taken a backseat the night before were once again front and center. I drove to the office with my stomach in knots. My body was like a tightly wound string ready to pop at any moment. Even the brush of the soft cotton crotch of my underwear against me was torture.
I walked gingerly from the car to the building hoping no one stopped me to talk. I was in no condition to carry on a conversation. Luckily, I didn’t run into anyone and I hurried to the empty lift and got on.
He was here. I heard his voice coming from the office where he’d left the door open. My nipples got harder and that place between my
thighs wept. I squeezed my legs together but that only made it worse.
His new skank was nowhere in sight and I was too chicken to peep my head around the door to see if she was in there with him. I made as little noise as I possible could as I walked into the room.
I reached my desk just as he came to the door and looked out at me. I couldn’t quite read the look he sent my way, it was more like a glare of disapproval. I looked away and turned on my computer, waiting for what came next. Nothing. He just turned and walked back into his office closing the door behind him.
There was more than enough work waiting for me on my desk that I didn’t need to go to him. I dove right in and hated myself for the fact that I had a much easier day than yesterday all because he was here, close.
I lost track of time and was jolted back to the present when he buzzed me into his office. A quick look at my watch and the grumbling of my stomach told me it was a little after lunch.
I walked into his office where he was sitting behind his desk still looking pissed. “Yes sir.”
“Come.” I walked around the desk and sat when he patted his lap. “Open your blouse.”
My fingers shook as I did as he asked. When the silk fell back exposing the white lace of my bra, I felt his hand on my leg. It felt hot through the silk of the thigh highs he insisted I wear to work, until it landed on the bare flesh of my upper thigh.
I held my breath waiting for the feel of his fingers. Yes, now he will give me the sweet release that I need. I jumped when he tore my underwear and threw it to the carpeted floor. “Go close the door.” He bit my ear after whispering the order to me. I stood and walked across the room, those damn balls rolling around inside of me.
Once the door was closed and locked I went back to him and got back in place on his lap. He pushed my bra aside and cupped my breasts, which were still tender. “Feed them to me.” I leaned back and pushed my chest forward for his waiting mouth.
The Good Girl Page 5
