“Smith, get your ass to base. You’re wheels up in ninety minutes. You’ll get your instructions when you arrive.”
“Yes, Sir.”
The double beep indicated the call had ended. Ryan ran a hand through his head. He didn’t have time to mess around. He needed to get home, dressed in his gear and out the door.
He rushed back to Suzie’s room, stopping when his gaze fell on the smooth expanse of her back. God, how he wanted to climb back into that bed, kiss his way down his spine to wake her up. Then make slow love to her. Hear her soft cries of pleasure as he brought her to the brink and the yell of her completion as she fell into her orgasm.
His dick hardened against the metal zipper of his jeans, obviously liking the idea too, but it was one he couldn’t fulfill. Ryan glanced around the room and spied a notepad and pen on her bedside table. Leaving a note wasn’t the ideal thing to do, but he really didn’t want to disturb her sleep.
In seconds he’d ripped the page off the pad and rested it on the pillow he’d used. He leaned down and inhaled, her sweet rose scent intermingled with the aroma of their lovemaking. He closed his eyes and savored it, before kissing her lightly on the cheek.
“I’ll be back, Roses. I…” he couldn’t finish the sentence. It didn’t make sense to say the words out loud even though it was what he was feeling. It was too soon to say he loved her. How did he even know if he did and it wasn’t just because of the great sex they’d shared? Or the baby?
Now wasn’t the time to debate his feelings for Suzie. The team was about to go wheels up, his focus needed to be on the upcoming mission, his first since he’d gotten shot. He couldn’t be a liability to them.
Forty minutes later Ryan marched down the hallway to the meeting room where the team usually met. He walked in and stopped. They were all standing around Italy, the last time that happened, Erin had been taken captive. Then, instead of going on their allocated mission, they’d teamed up with Wolf’s team and had gone to rescue Erin and Antonia.
God, he hoped it was nothing like that. With Suzie in his life now, he couldn’t imagine the pain Italy had to have in that moment. If anything happened to Suzie, he was sure he’d go insane.
“What’s happened?” he asked and five men turned in his direction.
“About time you showed,” responded Cowboy.
He grunted and made his way to stand near Italy. They guy had a dumbfounded, shocked look on his face. “Is Erin okay, man?”
A big smile broke out over his face. “More than okay. I’m gonna be a dad.”
Ryan bit his tongue to stop himself from blurting out Me too. Instead he slapped him on the back. “Congrats, man, that’s awesome. Does this mean our orders are changed, we’re not leaving now.” He hoped that was the case, then he could stay and keep a close eye on Suzie.
“Nah, she told me to get out of her hair when I suggested I stay around. She said she was fine and if something was going to happen it wouldn’t matter if I was nearby or in the middle of nowhere.”
Italy’s tone suggested that it would kill him if something happened while he was away. Ryan knew exactly how the other man felt. “I’m sure everything’s going be fine. After the hell you two went through to be together. Nothing’s going to happen Erin or your kid.”
Italy nodded, and conversation died when Commander Black strode through the door.
“Gentleman, we’ve got a situation in the Congo. You’ll be joining with another team. You’ll see them on the plane.”
Commander Black continued to give a rundown of the mission. Ryan listened with half an ear, his mind on what Suzie would think when she woke up alone. Would she hate him for not waking her or would she understand he was thinking of her?
An elbow to his ribs pulled him from his thoughts, he glared at Robot who simply raised his eyebrows. Yeah, he didn’t need to get on the bad side of his team his first mission back. With a concerted effort he redirected thoughts of Suzie out of his mind and on the task at hand. He didn’t want to be the reason the mission failed.
When the Commander finished relaying information about the trip, Ryan and his team walked out and headed toward the airfield.
“Are you going to be okay?” Robot asked as he walked beside him.
Ryan bristled at the suggestion that he would be a liability. “Yeah I’m fine. I can deal with anything.”
Robot studied him, and Ryan schooled his features into an impassive face. It must have worked because his team lead gave a brief nod and they continued on their way.
“Do you think it’s Wolf’s team we’ll be working with?” he asked.
Robot shrugged. “Who knows, could be anyone.”
They reached the plane and climbed onboard. Already seated were eight men dressed in black. Ryan recognized one of the guys as the one who sat next to him on the flight back after he got shot. He wasn’t too hard to forget with the scar marring one side of his face. He sat next to him and held out his hand. “Truck, right? Good to see you?”
The man nodded and grasped Ryan’s hand, giving it a quick shake. “Yeah. Good to see you on your feet?”
“Thanks.” Ryan settled his pack next on the ground next to him. He glanced around at the other guys. Last time he’d been dealing with pain so hadn’t paid too much attention to the other team. Now, getting a good look at them, he could tell they weren’t another SEAL team. These guys carried a harder edge about them. They were probably Delta Force, but he knew better than to ask.
From the brief they’d been given by the Commander, Ryan had guessed it was going to be a tough mission. With a Delta Force team along, things just got a bit more interesting.
Susie woke up and stretched, her muscles protesting at the movement. She reached out and found an empty side, the sheets cool between her touch.
She lay still, hoping to hear the sound of the shower, or movement in the kitchen. But silence shrouded her. She was alone.
Why would Ryan leave without saying goodbye to her? Did their night together mean absolutely nothing to him?
Stop it!
He wouldn’t leave without a good reason. She flung her hand out to grab the pillow he used to hug close to her when she heard the crinkle of paper. Sitting up she clutched the sheet against her breast and picked up the note.
Hey Roses,
Sorry to run out without waking you, but I got orders. I don’t know how long I’ll be and if I can even call you. If you need anyone or anything call Erin.
I’ll call the moment I can.
Ryan xxx
Suzie read the note a couple of times. Okay, so he didn’t run out on her, but she wished he’d woken her up. Even to say goodbye. What if she never heard his voice again?
She slammed the brakes on thoughts like that. No way was she going to let her fears paralyze her. This was the way her life was going to be if she wanted Ryan in her future. A glance at the clock told her she needed to get a move on if she was going to make her shift at the hospital.
“We’ve got this, baby,” she said as she patted her stomach. “No matter what, Mommy is going to be strong for you and for Ryan.” There was no other choice, falling apart every time Ryan left wouldn’t be good for her or their child. They were all a team and, as he said, she could contact Erin. The other woman must be feeling very vulnerable knowing she’d just found out she was pregnant, and her man was leaving her behind for goodness knows how long.
Determined to be the strong, independent woman she’d become after walking away from Peter, she threw back the covers and got out of bed. Her stomach turned over and for a moment she thought she was going to throw up. She was in her second trimester, she should be over this. Although it wasn’t unheard of that women suffered morning sickness throughout the whole of their pregnancy. A couple of deep breaths pushed the nausea away. She had this.
Thirty minutes later she was munching on an apple checking she had everything in her handbag, she’d put Ryan’s note in a safe place. It comforted her to keep it close to her.
Opening the door, she gasped and choked on the piece of apple she’d been chewing. A large slap on the back dislodged the piece. Tears streamed down her face and she gulped air down like a goldfish out of water. “Jesus, Jeffrey, what the hell do you think you’re doing standing at my front door?”
“I was about to knock to see if you were okay. You’ve normally left work by now when you have your morning shift.”
Apprehension prickled down her spine and Ryan’s words about not trusting him resonated in her mind. “How do you know what shift I’m on?”
“Well if you were on night shift you wouldn’t have been out last night.”
His quick response was reasonable, and made sense, however his actions were beginning to creep her out. He bobbed his head around as if he was trying to see inside her apartment. He wouldn’t find anyone. He had no idea Ryan had slipped out earlier, or did he?
“Can I help you with anything else?” she asked, wanting to put some distance between them. Until Ryan had talked about Jeffrey last night she hadn’t given the other man too much head space.
“No, just making sure you’re okay.”
“Well as you can see I’m fine. I need to go, otherwise I’ll be late.” She closed the door and twisted the lock, wishing Jeffrey had walked away. She hated knowing he was aware her apartment was empty. Of course, this wasn’t the first time they’d met up in the hall when she’d left for work. Only this time it wasn’t a coincidence. Everything about this encounter screamed he’d been watching her.
A shudder rippled down her spine and she wished Ryan wasn’t away. No way was she planning on letting Jeffrey know he wasn’t going to be around for a while. There was no way she could shake him off. He was going to trail her to the lifts and out the building—like he’d done on numerous occasions.
The trip down to the ground floor, passed in silence. That was the last thing she expected to happen. What she expected was for Jeffrey to pepper her with questions about Ryan and where he was. It seemed totally weird that he hadn’t especially after he’d asked her if she was alone.
“Have a good day at work, Jeffrey.” Suzie made to walk away, but a hand on her arm stilled her. Unlike when Ryan touched her, her skin shriveled instead of sizzling. As impolite as it would seem, she shook her arm free and took a couple of steps back. “You wanted something?”
He swallowed, and his eyes shifted left to right. “I, uh, wanted to know if you’d like to have a drink with me tonight.”
He was asking her on a date? After he’d seen Ryan arrive home with her last night. The guy was delusional if he thought she would go out with him. Instinct had her wanting to yell No loudly at him. She controlled the urge, upsetting the man wouldn’t achieve anything. She had to let him down lightly.
“Thank you for the invitation, but I’m going to have to decline. I already have plans with a girlfriend.” She didn’t have plans, but she was going to ring Erin and see if she could spend the night with her. Even though she’d only met the girl, the fact that their men were away, she was sure Erin would be okay with her crashing at her place. She had an afternoon shift tomorrow, so she could slip home when Jeffrey was safely at work.
His eyes narrowed as if he didn’t trust her words. “Okay, maybe another night then.”
“Maybe.” She glanced at her watch. “I really have to run, thanks for making sure I made it downstairs safely.”
“Anytime, Suzie. I only ever want to keep you safe.”
Somehow, she figured her sense of safe was different to his. Brushing off the encounter she walked to her car, darting a glance over her shoulder, noticing that he stood on the pavement watching her.
“Damn it, Ryan. Why did you have to go and leave now?” she muttered as she got into her car.
Today was going to be long day.
Chapter Ten
Erin flopped down on the couch and Suzie bit back a laugh. “I’m gonna kill, Carlos when he gets back.”
Now Suzie laughed. “No, you’re not. Can I get you anything?”
“A time machine so I can leap forward four months. I thought they called it morning sickness for a reason, you know you get sick when you wake up. Not at fucking 9 p.m. in the evening.”
When Suzie had called the other woman, Erin had been more than happy to have her over for the night.
“Here, I made you some ginger tea.” Antonia walked in with a steaming mug in her hand.
“Ginger is good for nausea,” Susie agreed.
“I’d prefer a wine,” grumbled Erin as she accepted the mug from her friend.
“Well you had to go and get yourself knocked up, don’t blame me for your lack of ability to have wine.”
Erin poked her tongue out at her friend and a dart of jealousy pierced Suzie. She wished she had a girlfriend who would look out for her like Antonia was for Erin. When she’d arrived at Erin’s place she’d been surprised to see Antonia was there. As far as Suzie was aware, Antonia had a job in New York.
“Well once you’ve had the baby we can go out and have a celebratory drink,” Suzie said.
“You’ll at least you’ll get to have wine sooner than me.”
“You’re pregnant, too?” asked Antonia her eyes wide in surprise.
It was impossible to prevent the blush warming her cheeks. Words were impossible, so she just nodded.
Now two people who were associated with Ryan knew she was pregnant. Had he told anyone on his team? Erin had mentioned that Carlos had gone off to base with a goofy grin on his face, so him keeping it quiet was going to be impossible. Would Ryan then also spread the news?
No, he wouldn’t. She may have only known Ryan for a short time, but there was no way he’d take away the limelight from Carlos. He’d let the other man enjoy his moment before he’d break the news. Besides the last thing the team needed to know before heading out on an assignment was that two of the team members had expectant significant others.
“Suzie? I asked if Joker is the father?” Antonia interrupted her thoughts.
“Umm yeah, he is.”
“But didn’t you just meet?”
“Leave it, Antonia.” Erin interjected.
Antonia’s questioning didn’t bother her. Suzie was well aware Ryan had wanted to meet Antonia after seeing her picture. He’d told her about it their first dinner date. It had surprised her how honest he’d been, and she appreciated it. Besides he’d also mentioned that Antonia had spent most of her visit with Robot and not him. There had been no spark between him and Antonia, even though Ryan had like her in the picture, in person they just weren’t compatible. Not like her and Ryan.
A shiver rippled through her in remembrance of their first date and the night they’d just shared together.
“It’s okay, Erin. I don’t mind the questions.” Suzie looked over at Antonia who’d settled in the lounge chair, her legs curled up beneath her. “I met Ryan when you and Erin were brought into the hospital after your kidnapping. We had dinner and well one thing lead to another and here we are about to be parents.”
“You have no reason to be annoyed, Toni, you told me you didn’t feel anything with Joker and you said he agreed.”
If she hadn’t been watching Antonia closely she wouldn’t have seen the momentary flash of hurt appear in her eyes. Shit, did she feel something for Ryan? Was that what she and Robot were arguing about yesterday at the party. Or was she hurt that Erin called her out.
The last thing Suzie wanted to do was cause issues between two friends. Before she could say anything, Erin spoke again.
“Plus, there’s something going on with you and Robot, and you still haven’t told me what that’s all about.”
“It’s complicated,” Antonia responded.
“Isn’t it always,” said Suzie. “Whoever tells you their relationships are perfect are lying. Believe me I know.”
She clamped her lips shut. The last thing she wanted to do was talk about her disaster of a marriage and how she’d let a man control every single as
pect of her life. Suzie still wasn’t convinced once the baby came, Ryan would try and control everything. No matter how much he told her she was in charge.
“Preaching to the choir, sister,” Erin said as she leaned forward holding her hand up for a high five. Their palms slapped and the tension that had enveloped the room disappeared. Suzie also noticed Antonia breathed out. The issue between her and Robot was definitely interesting, but it wasn’t her place to question her about it. She redirected the conversation onto the latest hot new cop show on television and received a grateful mouthed thank you from Antonia.
The second she closed her apartment door, Suzie slumped against the wood, her heartrate falling back to normal. The whole time she walked down the hallway she kept waiting for Jeffrey’s door to open, which was ridiculous since it was the middle of the morning and he would’ve been at work.
A yawn wracked her body. The evening with Erin and Antonia had been fun and there were no more awkward moments. They’d shared their celebrity crushes and at about two in the morning they decided it was time to sleep. Only sleep had proved difficult for Suzie. Her mind immediately drifted to Ryan and she wondered where he was and what he was doing. Was he safe? Had he been hurt again.
It had taken a monumental effort to push the thoughts aside and finally fall asleep. Being exhausted wasn’t good for her or the baby, especially since she had a shift she had to get through.
Dragging herself away from the doorway she looked up, stopped and gasped—her apartment had been trashed. The stuffing from her couch throw pillows were scattered all over the hallway.
With trembling fingers she reached into her purse, pulled out her cell phone and dialed 9-1-1. She stayed rooted to the spot while she gave her address and other details to the dispatcher.
What she wanted to do was get out of there, but she had to now wait. The thing was her door wasn’t ajar when she arrived home. The lock didn’t appear to have been tampered with.
Special Forces: Operation Alpha: Guarding Suzie (Kindle Worlds Novella) Page 9
