Clearly the other man recognized the claim Ryan was staking as Jeffrey’s shoulders straightened and his chest puffed out a little. In comparison to Ryan, he was a little robin standing up to an eagle. “Suzie is my friend. I have a right to be concerned about her.”
The last thing she wanted was for Ryan and Jeffrey to go at it in the middle of the hallway. The situation needed to be defused and defused now. “I appreciate it, Jeffrey. Ryan is just being a little…” Overpowering, arrogant, sexy and protective. None of those adjectives would work. “Well he’s worried that’s all. Have a good day, Jeffrey.”
She hoped he would take the hint and go back to his apartment or go off to work. After a heated second he turned on his heel and marched back to his apartment. The door slamming when it closed.
Her shoulders slumped and the tension riding her spine dissipated when Ryan rubbed his hand across her shoulders. “I’m sorry,” he said as he leaned down and kissed the back of her neck. “I don’t trust him, and I get all—”
“Macho Navy SEAL. I can look after myself you know.” Well she thought she could until her privacy was invaded and destroyed. Now she still couldn’t twist the knob to open the door.
“You know you don’t have to do this,” said Ryan as though he could read her mind. “The guys and I can come and clean up for you.”
That was the last thing she wanted, his team traipsing down the hallway scaring not only Jeffrey but the other residents with their military bigness. This was her place and she would face it. Then put it all behind her and try and find a new place to live. No way was she going to bring a child back to a complex where break-ins could go unnoticed. “No, I need to do this.” She turned so she was facing Ryan, his presence crowded her. “I told myself when I walked away from my marriage that I wouldn’t be a victim anymore. I’m not going to start now.”
Ryan’s eyes widened at her declaration. “You’ve been married before? Are you saying your ex-husband hurt you? Why am I just finding out about this now?”
Again, not a conversation she wanted to have out where all and sundry could hear it. With a burst of courage, she twisted the knob behind her and pushed the door open.
“Fuck.”
Suzie wasn’t surprised by Ryan’s outburst, with her back to the apartment she could still picture the devastation. “Yeah.”
“You are never coming back here again,” he declared as he grabbed her hand and together they walked across the threshold.
“I’d already worked that out.”
“We’ll go apartment hunting or house hunting next weekend. I’m sure we’ll find something that we both like.”
Both like?
“Whoa, wait up. Who said anything about moving in together?” While she was glad it appeared Ryan had forgotten his surprise and questions about her marriage, his assumption that they would be moving in together set her off. She extracted her hand from his and put some space between them.
“It makes sense. We’re having a baby together. Why wouldn’t we live together?”
Confusion colored his face, but all Suzie was focused on was his declaration about them moving in together. “Umm because you’ve made this decision without asking me. Did you forget you said I was in charge of how things went between the two of us. I’m not being forced into a situation where I lose all control. If that’s what you think is going to happen then there’s the door buddy, you can see yourself out.”
Suzie stomped down the hallway to her bedroom in the hopes that she could salvage some clothes. She’d stay in a hotel if she had to. It was her life and she was still in control of it.
Ryan ran a hand over his head and counted to ten. Her anger made no sense? Why couldn’t she understand he needed to keep her close, so he could protect her and their baby? He could blame it on the shock of seeing the state of her apartment on top of her declaration that she’d been married before and, if he read between the lines correctly, she’d been abused. His protective instincts had gone on high alert and he’d acted like a caveman by making decisions without even consulting her. No wonder she stormed away.
He had to fix this. Life without Suzie in it wasn’t one he wanted to contemplate living.
Making his way over tossed furniture and cushions he headed for her bedroom, stopping abruptly when he spied the word painted on her wall. The woman he cared for more and more each day stood staring at the word, a tattered t-shirt in her hand. “Suzie,” he called her name quietly, not wanting to scare her.
“I’m not a slut,” she whispered. “I’ve only ever slept with two men in my life.”
Ryan rushed over to her and enveloped her in a big hug, hoping to transfer some of his warmth and strength into her. “Baby, I know.” He brushed a kiss on the top of her head. He didn’t want to ask the question, but he had to. “Do you think it was your ex who did this? Do you think he found out about us and our baby?”
Suzie shuddered in his arms. “I don’t know. I don’t think so. But Peter was very good at using his words to make deep cuts into my self-confidence, so he could be responsible.”
“Did you give his name to the police when they came and took their report?”
She shook her head. “I wasn’t really thinking clearly and, honestly, it never crossed my mind until you asked.” Suzie pulled away from his embrace and tossed the t-shirt onto the wrecked bed. “How stupid is that? He should’ve been my first suspect in all of this. But,” she looked around. “This was done by someone in a massive rage, and that’s not really Peter. His methods tended to be more on the sly. Saying things which, on the surface, didn’t appear to be hurtful, but over time the cutting remarks dug deeper and deeper until nothing was left, and you ended up believing you were more worthless than a spec of dirt.”
Ryan clenched his fists to stop himself from punching the wall. How could anyone do that to a person. Especially a woman who was as beautiful and full of life as Suzie. As much as he’d like to hunt the fucker down, it wouldn’t achieve anything. Suzie had found the courage to walk away and he’d found her.
She was his now and he would do everything to keep her safe.
“Perhaps we should go down to the station and give them Peter’s name,” he suggested.
“I suppose. But I really don’t think it’s him. The one and only time he hit me, I walked out. The verbal abuse was something I took. It was stupid that I put up with it for so long. It was only when he decided to strike out at me, I found the strength to leave.” She turned in a small circle. “This was the first place I’d truly created as my own and now it’s all gone. This was my salvation and my healing process. With every piece of furniture. Every dish. Every cushion and sheet set I picked out I was putting myself back together and becoming an independent woman. Now it’s all gone. In one fell swoop everything I’d built shattered beyond repair.” Her voice choked up and his heart broke at seeing the tears silently tracking down her cheeks. “What did I do to deserve this?”
The sobs broke then, and he pulled her close, wrapping her up in his embrace again. He rested his cheek on top of her head, not saying anything. Just holding her and letting her cry. Reining in his desire to find this Peter guy and belt the shit out of him. No man should ever touch a woman in anger.
If he ever found who did this to her place, he wouldn’t be responsible for the hurt he’d inflict on them.
He would be here for Suzie in any way shape or form to take the burden she was willing to share with him. After what she’d told him, about how her ex had treated her, he wouldn’t pressure her to move in with him. He would stand by his words of her being in charge of their relationship. Every move they made would be according to Suzie. However long she needed to feel comfortable enough to live with him, he would give it to her. Be it six months or two years. She’d have it.
Suzie was his now. He planned on giving her the world.
Chapter Twelve
Once again Suzie found herself lying on her back with a scratchy hospital blanket covering her legs.
Ryan had hold of her hand.
“You okay, Roses?”
He’d been so wonderful after she melted down at her place. He’d held her and let her cry. Her emotions were still close to the surface, but the excitement at the prospect of seeing her baby again was taking top billing. “Yeah, I’m fine. Nervous.”
Ryan scooted his chair closer to the bed. He was being so sweet she didn’t know how to handle it. “What are you nervous about?” he asked.
Could she share her worries with him? Of course, she could. He was the father of her child. They were embarking on a relationship. If they didn’t end up together it was important that they got on for the sake of their child. She took a deep breath and squeezed his hand. “There are so many unknowns in a pregnancy. You don’t see what’s going on inside so you may think you and the baby are fine, but there could be issues that only show up in an ultrasound.”
Color leached out of Ryan’s face. “What? Are you saying something’s wrong? Are you having pain?”
Okay, so maybe expressing her concerns wasn’t the right thing to do. “No, I don’t think anything’s wrong. I’m feeling great. But I’m a nurse, I know things.”
Any more chance of conversation was halted when her doctor walked into the room.
“Good afternoon, how are you all today?” asked Dr. Jones her cheerfulness just what she needed.
“We’re all good. How about you?” Suzie asked.
“Fine. Now are we looking forward to seeing your son or daughter again?”
“Yes.” They both answered at the same time.
Dr. Jones smiled. “Excellent. Now have you decided if you’d like to find out the sex of the baby?”
Suzie started when the doctor smeared cool gel on her belly. Finding out the sex of the baby wasn’t something they’d discussed. She looked at Ryan.
“Up to you,” he murmured.
He continued to amaze her with how he let her make the important decisions. She knew it was must go against his nature as a person who has to make split second life and death situations in his job. He had to be in constant control and yet, he was handing it over to her.
Suzie turned back to Dr. Jones who was watching them with an indulgent smile. “Yes. Yes, we’d like to find out.”
“All right then. I’ll take a few measurements and we’ll listen to the heartbeat and then find out the sex of this baby. Sound good?”
“Sounds perfect.” Ryan answered, his voice pitched low and the tone did crazy things to her heartbeat.
The next few minutes passed with the doctor moving the wand over her belly. Tears filled Suzie’s eyes as the baby came into focus. A little hand waved in the air and both she and Ryan chuckled.
Ryan squeezed her hand so tight when the whoosh whoosh whoosh of their child’s heartbeat filled the room.
“I don’t think I’ll ever get over how amazing that sound is,” he said.
“It is a great sound and I have to say your baby looks strong and healthy. All the measurements are on spot for being twenty weeks pregnant. Okay, let’s see if baby is going to cooperate and let us see the important part of this scan.”
Suzie held her breath, unsure if she wanted a boy or a girl. Surely, a big tough Navy SEAL would want a son first. A boy to carry on his name.
“All right, baby is being cooperating and I can see what you’re having.”
Suzie squinted at the screen to see if she could work out between the black and grey lines what the sex of their baby was. Unfortunately, she couldn’t tell. “What is it?” she asked tightening her already tight grip on Ryan’s hand.
“Congratulations, you’re having a daughter.”
Her eyes flew to Ryan’s hoping and praying she wouldn’t see disappointment in them. What she saw had the tears filling her own eyes spilling over. He had the biggest smile she’d ever seen. “You’re okay with having a girl?” she whispered.
Ryan leaned forward and kissed her quickly on the lips. “I couldn’t be happier. Girls are precious. Thank you for gifting me with a daughter.”
For the second time in a few hours, Suzie broke down crying in Ryan’s arms, this time it was for joy and confirmed what she’d been trying to deny.
She would move in with Ryan. How could she not when she’d fallen head over heels in love with him.
Ryan would blast her if he was aware of where she was headed. It had been two weeks since her meltdown in her apartment. Between the two of them they’d managed to salvage one suitcase of clothes for her. Not that she could fit into them anymore. Her belly had well and truly popped and the news was out at work and within Ryan’s team.
A little flutter of movement in her belly made her smile. She couldn’t wait until she could dress her daughter in all the pretty girl’s clothes she always admired when she walked past the baby section of department stores. So many dresses with ruffles and ribbons. Her smiled widened when she remembered how, after they’d left the doctor’s surgery, Ryan stopped at a baby store and purchased a pink teddy bear. It took pride of place in the middle of their bed.
At first, she’d been angry with herself for craving his protection, but had slowly, with Ryan’s help, come to the realization that moving in with him wasn’t a show of weakness. He gave her all the space she needed, which wasn’t much considering his place was a one-bedroom apartment. But he never forced her into anything and always asked her before he did anything.
With every passing second, she was falling more and more in love with him. The fear of him leaving again was forever imbedded in the back of her mind, but if he did, he’d already told her that Erin had offered her their spare room anytime she wanted it.
She pulled to a stop and looked up at the brown brick building. The day after her last visit to the apartment, Ryan had asked her if she was comfortable with him and a couple of the guys sorting out her apartment. At the time she never wanted to step foot into again, so she said yes. But over the last two days a restlessness she couldn’t understand bit at her heels, encouraging her to see the place one last time before she handed the keys over to the buildings superintendent. The leasing company had been more than happy to let her out of her lease, without any penalty. For a second, she wondered if Ryan or even Tex had something to do with their acquiesce to her request to leave, but probably they were just happy she didn’t sue.
“You can do this,” she said out loud and the baby kicked in agreement. “We’re both strong independent women. We can face anything.” She rubbed her belly once and then opened the door.
After a ride up the rickety elevator she, once again, stood outside her door. For the last time she inserted the key and opened it. Dust motes flew in the air, reminding her of the first time she’d opened the door after she’d signed her lease. Excitement had flowed through her then at her first step of independence. Now all she could think about was how it wasn’t home. Home was with Ryan.
Before she could take a step, a hand clamped over her mouth and the chill of steel rested against her throat, stopping any thought of struggling out of the hold the person had on her. The blade was resting against her artery, one jolt and it would be sliced and she’d bleed out in a matter of minutes. Her hands instinctively went over her belly. She had a baby to protect and she would do whatever she needed to do to ensure nothing happened to her and Ryan’s daughter.
“It’s about time you came back here. I’ve been waiting. I knew you’d want to come back again.” A low voice hissed in her ear. It sounded familiar, yet at the same time it didn’t. “I’m just glad you didn’t bring your boorish boyfriend. He’s no good for you, my sweet Suzie. But I am. You belong to me. You always have.”
By the time her assailant had finished speaking she worked out who it was. “Peter?” The word was muffled around the hand still covering her mouth.
“Got it in one, sweetheart. Now do you promise to be quiet?” To highlight his point, he pressed the knife harder against her neck.
Suzie nodded, there was more at stake here than her own s
afety. She had her daughter to think of and she would never put her at risk.
“Good girl.” He removed his hand from her mouth waiting half a heartbeat before trailing it down her body. A shiver of revulsion filled her, and she struggled hard to stop the contents of her stomach landing at her feet. When Peter’s hand connected with her baby bump she sucked in a deep breath. “Well. Well. Well. You have been busy haven’t you. I was right, you are a slut.”
“You broke into my apartment? Why? Why would you do that to me?”
“Oh no, you don’t get to ask the questions. You’ve never had that right, don’t you remember?” He didn’t give her a chance to respond as the ding of the elevator arriving at her floor echoed down the hallway. The knife was removed from her throat and Peter’s arm banded around her shoulder, pulling her tightly against him. The scent of his body odor assailed her nose and her stomach heaved again. How long had it been since he’d showered?
“Don’t say a word,” he muttered in her ear as he walked her down the hallway toward the stairwell.
“Suzie? Is that you?”
Oh no, Jeffrey. This was just getting worse. What if he and Peter were in cahoots together? Was this a plan conjured up between the two of them?
“Answer him, but if you give any indication of what is really going on here, I’m going to rip that kid out of your belly and watch the both of you die.”
The venom in his voice indicated he meant every word he spoke. In all the time she’d been with Peter he’d never shown her this side. Apart from that one time when he’d struck her, he’d only verbally abused and controlled her. The man by her side was nothing like the man she’d known. He was truly insane.
Again she nodded, letting Peter know she understood his instructions. He turned them so she was facing her neighbor. “Hey Jeffrey, I was just paying the apartment one last visit before giving the super the key.”
Her neighbor looked between her and Peter. She pasted a smile on her face, hoping it was convincing enough so he’d just continue on his way to his place and wouldn’t get involved. “Where’s your boyfriend?”
Special Forces: Operation Alpha: Guarding Suzie (Kindle Worlds Novella) Page 11
