by May Dawson
"I'm not being a very good nurse," I murmured. I wrapped one of my arms tightly around his shoulders, pulling myself up to kiss that bruise.
He shook his head, his expression playfully woe-begone. "You really aren't. A good nurse would get on top."
I pressed a finger to his lips, then took his shoulders in my hands and pushed him down onto the bed. He groaned again, as if it hurt, but he let me climb on top of him. I settled down with my belly on his knees, my elbows braced on either side of his hips, and looked past the rise of his cock to that face I loved, so bruised and battered now. His deep blue eyes were intent on mine.
"I don't know," I said. "Does this really have healing properties? Should I—"
"Yes," he said firmly. "You should."
I grinned and wrapped my hand around him, taking him firmly in my grip. I teased him with the tip of my tongue, flicking the head of his cock, and then ran my tongue up and down his shaft. I heard him sigh in pleasure, a long exhale as I stroked my tongue over his balls.
I sat up, his muscular thigh between my thighs, and leaned forward, making a show of examining his shoulder thoughtfully. It still appeared to be bruised.
Levi's lips quirked up and he shook his head slightly, as if he found me exasperating. But since I was hanging over him, he took the opportunity to take my breasts in his hands. His palms took the weight of my breasts, lifting them slightly, before his thumbs stroked over my nipples. They were small pink pebbles between his long, broad fingers as he caressed them, and I heard myself moan slightly.
Levi's eyes were intent on me, gauging my reaction, as he leaned forward. He kissed the corner of my breast, his lips reverent, and then drew my nipple into his mouth. My back arched, pushing my breast into his face, as I drew in a surprised breath. The feeling that ran through my body was intense and pleasurable all at once. His tongue swirled over my nipple, and I felt my core tighten in response, full of longing.
I reached back and took him in my hand, squeezing him tightly, and I heard him moan into my hair.
"Who's teasing who?" I murmured into his ear, because I couldn't tell anymore.
He eased off my nipple, and his breath was cool against it when he said softly, "It's a terrible game."
I started to grin, but then he licked my nipple, and my back arched again.
I pressed his cock between my thighs, rubbing his head against my clit and letting him feel how wet I was for him. I swirled his tip against me in slow, wide circles, using him like he was my toy, feeling him lengthen and harden against me even more.
I sat up, straddling his hips and reluctantly pulling my breasts away from his perfect touch. I felt him brush between my thighs, seeking more, but I pulled away, crawling across the bed to his nightstand table. I pulled out a condom, ripping it open as I turned back, and I ran it down his length. I stopped to take his balls in my palm, massaging the firm weight.
"A terrible game where everyone wins in the end," I said, throwing my leg back over his hips. Despite his alleged exhaustion, his big hands wrapped around my hips, helping to guide me as his tip brushed between my thighs. His tip brushed against my wetness again, and I took him firmly in my hand to push him against my clit, using him over and over to stroke myself, knowing that it stimulated him too; I watched him fall back into the pillows, letting his eyes drift shut. Levi bit down on his lip, as if he were holding himself back from coming already.
I leaned forward to press a kiss to his shoulder, where the bruise was faded blue and shrinking. "Any more criticisms of my methods?"
"I do have some complaints, actually."
His big hands spanning my hips pulled me down, and I felt myself ease around his tip. I hesitated there, then pulled up and away, feeling him brush free over my thighs as he groaned.
I came back down, letting him enter me, barely, and then pulling away.
"So many complaints," he murmured, and I laughed. I continue to rock up and down, letting him slip into me and then rising back off again. His eyes were full of amusement and lust as he slid his hands down my thighs.
"I aim to please," I said, and I pushed myself down on his cock, letting him fill me up. Both of us drew in a breath as my inner thighs rocked against his hips and I ground down, taking in his full, impressive length.
Despite how he'd implied I should be doing the work while he was recovering, he drove his powerful hips up, filling me up over and over. His hard hands wrapped around my hips held me steady as we moved together.
I leaned forward to kiss him, and his lips met mine. Our tongues slipped together as his cock filled me, and all I felt was one long rush of pleasure. His short fingernails bit into my ass cheeks, the most pleasant bit of pain as I felt how badly he wanted me, how hard it was for him to hang on when he wanted to come.
My toes curled, and I felt my feet press against his shins as my muscles contracted. My core tightened around him, a steady spasm pulsing around his cock, and his eyes opened. Widened. Deep blue eyes stared into mine as I came hard. I sagged against him. He pulled me even tighter against his body as he came himself.
I slid off him, falling beside him on the bed. "Still going to file a complaint?"
He got up, padding into the bathroom to dispose of the trash, and came back as naked as ever, with a cocky smile on his face and a cock that seemed to still be in high spirits. I sat up on my elbows, smiling at him. "I thought you were tired."
He shrugged with one shoulder, then threw himself onto the bed beside me. He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me against him, drawing the curves of my body against his curves. He rested his chin against the top of my head.
"Maybe you've redeemed yourself," he said, his voice languid and lazy as he stroked his fingers down my side.
I squirmed slightly, thinking of the ill-considered words I'd used in the shower. I certainly hoped I redeemed myself in other ways.
Things certainly seemed to be back to rights as we lay there cuddling and chatting idly.
"Does this do anything?" I asked, brushing my fingers over his scarred knuckles. "Just lying here like this?"
"Does it matter?" He kissed the naked curve of my shoulder. "I don't plan to give it up, even if it doesn't come with some kind of supercharge."
"I just wondered. I always feel like there's so much I still don't understand about how this world works. How we work."
"I grew up in this world and I still feel that way." His voice grew sober.
I turned my head back to look at him, although I could only see part of his face in profile. I didn't want to ruin the moment by bringing up Nim, but I couldn't help thinking about him. I didn't know if we could really rescue him from Hell. Parrish had called me the Lightwalker, which was apparently what the Lilith was called throughout the Mythos; I was supposed to be able to walk through Heaven and Hell.
But I'd already watched one former Lilith get skewered in the afterlife. Just because I could walk into Hell didn't mean I would survive it.
He brushed my hair back from my forehead, his rough hand gentle, and kissed my hairline. "I'm worried about all the things we don't know. Hell." He hesitated. "Ash."
"Her ghost used to come to me when I really needed her," I said, thinking of the flash of my sister's skirt leading me into Levi's arms when one of the guards in the asylum was intent on murdering me. "Not just in my dreams. But now I think maybe... there's more of her there than there is here now. That's what Samael said."
"You can't trust anything Samael says. You know that." His eyes were worried as they met mine, as if he wanted to comfort me.
"Yeah, of course." I nodded. "I can't trust him. But that doesn't mean I can trust..." I let my voice trail off. I couldn't betray my sister by saying it out loud. And anyway... "I didn't trust Nim. I thought that was the smart thing. And now I feel so awful. The last experience he had in this life was dying for a bunch of people who didn't trust him—"
"Not just people." His voice was low and warm. "The girl we'd all die for. His brothers. It
took us some time to see who he really was, Ellis. But we'll make it up to him."
"By rescuing him from Hell?"
"We'll figure it out," Levi said. "We'll bring him back. And together, the five of us will work through what happened before."
I grinned despite myself. "You guys are going to what? Talk through it?"
"Probably not. But we always make it up to each other. We're brothers."
I thought of that little treehouse in the woods. How Levi and Jacob had written their names on it. Of Wendy hiding her journals, and maybe marking her young sons with dark magic as they slept at night, wiping ashes across their foreheads so they would forget Jacob as they slept. None of the boys would talk about that, although they had brushed up against the possibility.
"Do you think Jacob will ever stop feeling guilty about Wendy?" I asked, because I knew Levi didn't want to talk about his own guilt.
"I hope." But Levi didn't sound like he was very hopeful. "There's no reason for him to feel guilty about Wendy's choices."
"There's no reason for you to feel guilty, either," I said. Because I have no filter.
Levi froze for a second. He sat up on his elbow, his gaze sharp. I studied those deep blue eyes and the faded freckles across his high cheekbones which made me think of the boy he’d been. Although Levi had never been allowed to be a little boy at all; he’d slayed his first demon when he was eight, the same age Jacob had been when he was stolen by demons.
"I feel guilty, yeah, that I forgot Jacob But it gets a little better every day that we spend together." His voice was soft, as if he were afraid that his emotions would carry past the room.
"It helps that he's such a goddamn pain in the ass," Levi added.
The break in the tension made me smile, even though I knew that wasn't really true. If time was healing their wounds, it was because their love for each other was obvious every day. No matter how hard they could be on each other.
"Sometimes when you love people, it comes hand-in-hand with guilt," Levi said. "Because we're all fucked-up. We could all do better. But I think you just try again. You let it fade. If you really love each other."
Levi’s voice was quick and sure, as if he had thought about all this before.
I crinkled my nose at him. "Even if you're a half-demon?"
"Even if you’re a half-demon," he confirmed.
"What if you're hopelessly socially awkward? Does that fade too?"
"God, I hope so," he teased, his voice fervent, but he caught me with a strong arm and pulled me into his kiss anyway.
Chapter 19
"Now that we've got the Council off our backs, we need to get our brother." Ryker said as we all took our seats around the dining room table.
"We need a plan," Jacob said. "We can't just storm the gates of Hell." He paused, as if he were imagining it. "I mean, we could."
I shook my head. "Samael wants that. I don't know what to make of my vision, exactly, but I do believe Samael wants me. That he would at least offer us a trade, me for Nimshi..."
"Offer it, but not follow through." Levi shook his head. "We're not putting you in danger, Ellis."
"Hear me out," I said, and the guys all groaned. I glared at each of them in turn. Levi sighed, meeting my eyes evenly. Ryker stood and paced across the room, but that was Ryker; sometimes he couldn’t stand to sit still, especially when we were talking about me in danger. Jacob leaned back with one arm slung over the seatback, his eyebrows rising skeptically.
"I could be bait," I said. "Ash said she could help me get into the Far alone. Samael will be watching."
"So far, that doesn't sound like you're bait." Ryker reached the end of the dining room and turned around. "It sounds like you're just prey."
"You guys cross into the Far. Wait for me. I'll come back and with Ash. Samael will set a trap for me, never knowing we’re setting a trap for him."
"You don't even know that Ash can get you in," Jacob said. "She shouldn't have that kind of power."
My mom said, from the doorway, "She shouldn't. But I think she does."
"Why's that?" I asked.
"I want you to meet with Dr. Parrish," she said.
"I don't have time to meet with Dr. Parrish," I said. "Nimshi is in Hell. He's probably being tortured right now."
Whenever I thought of Nim in Hell, I remembered Samael yanking Nimshi's head up in my vision. The next thing I always thought about was how Nimshi had killed Samael, to keep Samael from killing me. It had been a split-second decision to defend me, a decision that revealed his heart. A decision that cost him everything he used to have.
But I hoped there would be a new life for him with us, now that he’d lost his old one.
“He's one of us, he's tough." Ryker rested his hand on my shoulder.
Levi raked his hand through his hair. "We don't know that he's one of us. Maybe this was a long con. Maybe he wants to get Ellis into the Far alone."
I leveled a serious look at him. "Could you be more suspicious?"
Levi raised his hands, mock-placating. "I'm just bringing up all possible ways things could go sideways. I didn't nix your bait-plan."
Bait-plan. "When you say it like that..."
"I told Dr. Parrish to drive into town," Mom said. "She's going to be there in a few minutes. You could meet her at the cafe and maybe she can help you save Nimshi."
I had been leaning back in my chair, and now I came down so fast I almost pinched my toes under the leg of the chair. "Excuse me?"
Ryker swore. "Landon girls..."
I leveled a finger at him. "Don't lump me into this. Mom, what the hell?"
"Well, she's on her way now," my mother said, in the same cheerful let's-not-argue tone she'd used throughout my childhood for whatever small betrayal she'd just sprung on me, from the dentist to saying family vacation when she meant my grandmother's house full of breakables, not Disney World. "Might as well go talk to her."
"Might as well," I said. I grinned, despite everything that was on my mind. "Might as well, because I'm going to drive."
Ryker’s eyes brightened with an affectionate, teasing light. "Any excuse, huh?"
"Do you want to come, Mom?" I asked, tossing the Corvette keys in the air and catching them again.
Mom shook her head. "Not if you're driving," she teased. "But do come talk to me after. I don't want..."
She trailed off, but I knew what she meant. She didn't want Dr. Parrish to hold anything back because she was there. But she didn't want me to hold anything against her, either.
I hugged her. It was hard for me to put into words, but I’d meant it when I said no grudge. She was still my mom.
By the time I turned around, Levi and Jacob were gone, and Ryker was at the door. I bounced over to jump on his back, throwing my arms over his shoulders.
He caught me, his hands gripping my forearms, and half swung-around, trying to look at me over his shoulder. He was smiling. "Why are you pouncing on me?"
"Because you just might be my favorite right now," I said.
"Because Corvette?"
"Because Corvette." I kissed his cheek.
Even though they all took turns every day being my favorite, so no one should be jealous. Or maybe I should say they were all always my favorites: favorite Ryker, favorite Levi, favorite Jacob. Favorite alpha male, favorite nice guy/stone cold killer, favorite British asshole. My perfect guys.
And my favorite dangerous demon with a hidden heart of gold.
I slid off Ryker's back, feeling guilty for the moment of levity.
Ryker took my hand in his and squeezed gently as the two of us headed out the door toward the front yard. "We're going to get him back, Firestarter. Don't worry."
"How do you know?"
"Well," he said. "I have faith in you, Ellis Landon. And you should have some too."
"To do the impossible? We couldn't even steal Nim's soul back from Hell. Now we're trying to steal Nim."
"Absolutely." Ryker said. He swung our hands between
us as we headed for the door. "If anyone can do the impossible, it'll be the girl who can put up with all of us."
In the yard, I stopped and turned to Ryker and Levi. "Do you think maybe you guys should hang back?"
"No," Ryker said bluntly.
"It's just that you and Parrish don't have the best track record," I said. "Maybe it'd be easier to get her to open up if it's just me. And Jacob, of course."
"Why Jacob of course?" Ryker demanded.
"Because I don't think you'll ever be too happy about me going off on my own." I rested a hand on Ryker's broad chest, and my other hand on Levi's, feeling their hearts beating through their t-shirts. "Didn't you say yourself: overprotective asshole, and I own it?"
Ryker sighed.
"Got you," I said, smiling sweetly.
Just ten minutes later, I cut the engine of the Corvette in the parking lot of Ruby's Diner and gave a happy sigh. I wanted to believe what Ryker had said. We should believe in the possibility of happy endings. After all, I had these boys on my side and they loved me enough to procure me the muscle car of my dreams.
Potentially sketchy as that procurement may have been. I was not going to ask questions.
"Thanks for the car," I told Jacob.
"It was Ryker's idea." His tone was nonchalant. He hung his sunglasses from the visor.
I swung open my car door and then looked at him over the roof of the car, slipping my sunglasses off and hanging them from the front of my t-shirt. "And you don't want any credit, huh?"
"I don't need it." His cheekbones arched dangerously high when he smiled at me. "I know I'm the favorite."
"Don't get cocky."
"Cocky is what makes me the favorite."
We walked hand-in-hand back down the one-block-long main street in this tiny country town. I loved when I had a little alone time with any one of my boys.
"You still owe me a date," I said. "Once we get Nim back and things go back to normal."
He cocked his head to one side, amusement in those warm golden eyes. "When have things ever been normal?"
