I take my hands from his hair, bringing them to the waist of his jeans while unbuckling his belt with one hand and unbuttoning his jeans with the other. I slide his jeans down along with his boxer briefs. My God, he is exquisite . I take his cock in my hand, surprised at how it feels. It is as hard as steel, but it feels as if it is covered in velvet. I've never held one in my hand before; I rub my thumb over the crown, taking the drop of pre-cum and spreading it over the crown of his cock. He groans a low primal growl. I bring my thumb to my mouth looking him in the eye as I lick my thumb before wrapping my lips around it with a moan. "Oh God, Parker," he says in a low, almost whisper.
My eyes close as I continue to suck his essence off my thumb. "Ian, you taste so good.” I drop to my knees, now looking up at him through my long lashes. I take my tongue and start to lick the crown of his cock, brushing over his tiny slit and taking in the new pre-cum that is released. My tongue swirls around his throbbing cock as deep, low moans escape Ian's mouth. I wrap one hand around the base of his cock and the other around his thigh. I can't believe I am doing this for him. It almost feels like second nature. My instincts take over. I must be doing something right because Ian's head is slanting back, and his eyes are closed. His mouth hangs slightly open for his moans to escape. I open my mouth, taking him in as far as I can. Wrapping my teeth with my lips I suck him, trailing my tongue over the thickening shaft. I let out a low moan. I can't believe the emotion that comes over me knowing I can make Ian feel this way; it's a heady feeling.
"Oh God! Parker" He is trying to pull me up, but I tighten my grip around his thigh so he can't move me. "I'm going to cum if you don't stop" Oh God! The throbbing between my legs gets stronger at his revelations. When I know he won't try to stop me I let go of his thigh, cradling his balls; I lightly massage them as I continue to suck. I stroke the base of his cock faster; Ian tangles his hand in my hair as if to keep him from falling. I remove my lips from my teeth, gliding them along his cock. "OH GOD, PARKER! OH GOD, PARKER... OH FUCK..." With that, Ian finds his release as the rush of his semen flows over my tongue. I quickly swallow his slightly salty essence, milking him with my lips and hand until he is sated. Ian bends to pull me to my feet as I finish licking my lips with a shy smile on my face. "Parker, that was..."
"So it felt okay?"
"Oh... my fucking God! That was amazing!" He is looking at me with hooded eyes.
"I guess it was your wish, and my command!" I say, with a naughty grin. He grabs me, taking my mouth in his.
We put ourselves back together, before getting back in the car and driving back to my apartment.
I pull out my key as we are making our way up the two flights of stairs to my apartment. Ian holds my hand. "Why don't you pack some things and stay the night at my place?" Ian asks.
"I have to work tomorrow. Your place is a little too far to walk from."
"I figured I would take you to work, if you don't mind. I have a meeting tomorrow night, and we probably won't see each other."
"Okay, give me a few minutes."
I gather my work clothes and my toiletries, placing them into an overnight bag; Ian takes it from me as we walk out of my apartment and back to his car. We drive a short distance to his condo. Pulling into the underground garage, we park and walk to the elevator and up to his unit.
Exhausted from all of the day's events we crawl into bed and snuggle down into the covers. I lay my head on his chest positioning my bent knee over his legs as he wraps his arms around my shoulders. This is home; safe in the arms of the man I love.
I wake to the sound of an alarm that was unfamiliar to me as I jump with a start. Then I feel his hot breath on my ear. "It's okay baby girl, you’re with me; your safe." He rubs his hand up and down my stomach.
"Mmmm. Thanks, babe,” I reply, as I shamelessly push my ass into his cock.
"I think I could get used to waking up with you next to me," he mumbles.
Chapter 11
I Hear Music
Parker
I didn't get to see much of Ian during the week, since he is busy with several evening meetings, and I am busy getting ready for his dad's book signing tomorrow morning, but we have a standing date for tonight.
I am off in two hours and of course, those two hours are longer than the whole week. I am excited to see Ian. Don't get me wrong, I love talking to him on the phone, but to be with him, and to see and touch him is incredible.
As I walk home to get ready for my date, I call Bridget and Ash to say hi and see how they are doing. I get their voicemails and leave them messages. Now and all I can do is think about seeing Ian. I still can’t believe I can feel this way about a man; especially this soon after moving away from home. But those words will have to wait, I don't want to be the first to say them, just incase he doesn't feel the same way. My stomach has butterflies taking flight with anticipation for tonight.
It's been hard sleeping alone. Even though Ian and I had just slept together a few times, I feel so safe in his arms; another thing I never thought I would like or want. I climb the two flights of stairs to my apartment thinking of what I need to do to get ready for the night.
While taking my shower, I think about what I want to wear. I don't have a lot of clothes, but I have some good accessories that would dress up any outfit. I dry myself off, starting the process of getting ready. After my makeup is on, hair dried, lotion applied, and a light mist of perfume sprayed, I pull out a dress from my closet. It’s a little purple shift dress; it is very modest in the front but it has a very low scooped back. I pair it with a pair of black four-inch Candies like Barbie always wears. I am just slipping on my shoes when there is a knock at my door. I look in my mirror before opening the door; I look like I am all legs with the dress coming mid-thigh. Add the four-inch heels and this will work fine, I think to myself. "Hi," I say as I open the door.
Ian looks at me before dropping as his eyes down to my body. Before I know it, Ian has me up against the wall. "God, you look stunning in that dress, I love that color on you. I missed you so much! I don’t know if I want to take you out in that outfit.” I look at him with a confused look. “I don’t want anyone to look at you the way I just did. I know everyone’s head will turn as you walk by.” He gives me a kiss as his hands roam up my waist. His mouth is on mine again. "I've missed you so much this week; I can't keep my hands off you." He takes my hand in his, motioning me to spin. Seeing the back of my dress, or the lack of it rather, his mouth drops. “Love, you are going to put a sweater on... aren’t you?”
"So, do you like what you see?" He mutely nods his head.
It's my turn to take my finger to the bottom of his chin, pushing his mouth closed.
I laugh at him. “No, it’s a nice warm evening.”
“But…”
“Ian, I am with you and only you. Nothing is going to change that. I say, trying to reassure him.
“God, I’m a lucky man to be seen with you tonight.”
“But then again... look at you, Mr. GQ." He's in a black tailored suit that hangs perfectly off his body, paired with a white linen shirt and black tie. "Your ass…God, it looks good normally. But in those dress slacks...” I lick my lips. "Yummy!"
He chuckles and out pops his dimple. “God, I love your dimple.” My body shudders.
He takes my hand in his as we walk out the door. When we’re outside, he places his hand in the small of my back before leading me to his Cadillac. “I thought we would go to the symphony and out to dinner afterwards.”
“I’ve never been to the symphony before.” I used to babysit for a family in which the dad played in the percussion section. They were a nice family.
The symphony is wonderful, and music has a way of infiltrating every part of my body. I close my eyes just listening, absorbing. It is so peaceful and moving, I let the music sink into me, filling me. It is beautiful. Ian holds my hand the entire time, drawing little circles with his thumb, tracing the back of my hand. Afterwards, we walk across the road to
Ruth Chris; the food is so good. The steaks are thick and cooked to perfection; it almost melts in your mouth.
After dinner, we decide to walk to Pioneer Square to see if there are any entertainers performing. Usually on the weekend all different buskers can be found. Tonight is no exception; everywhere we go we can hear music being played. The night air is warm, with just a slight breeze; it is wonderful out.
“I love coming down here just to people watch,” I reminisce. Never letting go of my hand, we walk to Starbucks to enjoy a couple cappuccinos. We find a place to sit, talking about what happened in each other's week. When we are finished with our cappuccinos, we stroll while not looking at anything in particular. We enjoy just being together, holding each other and wandering, before heading back to his car.
I had packed an overnight bag before we left my apartment, so we could just leave from Ian’s condo, and go straight to the book signing in the morning.
Once in Ian’s condo I place my bag in his bedroom, going into the en suite to put my toiletries away. I find he has duplicated all the products I use, down to the scent of my body wash. God, I love this man. Number one, how many guys would do that? Number two, How, many guys would even know where to look? He is so thoughtful.
I walk out of the bedroom and into the living area. Wrapping my arms around his neck, I give him a passionate kiss. “Have I told you how much I adore you, and what a loving and kind man you are?”
“I just want you to be comfortable here. I don't want you to worry about carrying your toiletries back and forth, plus when I miss you, all I have to do is smell your shampoo." I laugh, giving him another kiss.
“I’ll be right back.” He then heads to his room. I sit down on the sofa, pick up a magazine, and I scan through it. A few minutes later he returns, leans over the back of the sofa, and whispers in my ear. “I ran you a bath,” he says, as he kisses my hair. “Come with me.” I follow him as he undresses me before leading us into his candle lit en suite. Soft music playing through hidden speakers floats in the air. It's funny that I'm not shy about him undressing me. The tub is full of bubbles. He helps me down into the tub as the smell of vanilla and honeysuckle infuse my senses. I slip in as Ian walks to the door, dimming the lights. "Enjoy," he remarks before closing the door, and then he is gone. I lay back, listening to the music. I then realize it is the same music I have on my iPhone; Bond, Vanessa Mae, and Tangerine Dream. It is all music I love that touches my very soul. I lay there wondering how he knew what I liked. It was music my mother always played, so it wasn't anything new. In fact, I don't know if any of them are still around.
When the water chills I step into the shower to rinse myself off and then get ready for bed. God, I wish Ian would ask to join me in the shower, but I know that would be too much for him. Just sleeping together without sex is surely a struggle for him. It's a hard for me, and I haven't even enjoyed sex before. Maybe one day he will join me. I can't imagine how hard it is holding himself back.
We lie in bed; my head on his chest, as his arms wrapped around me. God, I love this. "How did you know about the music?" I tip my head to look up at him.
"It is on the playlist on your iPhone," he explained. "I hadn't heard of them, so I looked them up while downloading them to the iPod in a playlist. I really like them; you have a very eclectic taste in music."
"I love all kinds of music, but it has to touch my heart. When I find a band or performer I like, I usually can't get enough of them. So I listen to them over and over until everyone around me is sick of them. A couple years ago our club softball team made it to Nationals; that year they were held in San Diego. Since it wasn't really too far away, Bridget and Ash decided to drive it with me. I bought the new One Republic CD on the way out of town, and I never took it out of the CD player. Now every time I hear it, it reminds me of our trip."
"What are you listening to now?"
"Imagine Dragons."
"Is there a reason or is it just the music?"
"At first it was just the music; I had heard a couple of their songs on the radio, but then I heard the song Demons. It touched me deeply because that's what I feel inside. I have had it playing on my iPhone for the last six months, and that's all I listen to right now; I have it looped, so it continually plays."
"Do you really feel like that?" He looks down at me surprised. "I mean that's a pretty dark song."
"Yes, it is and yes that's how I feel a lot of times. That song touches me in a way I can't explain; I still get goosebumps when I hear it and if I just sit a listen to it, it brings tears to my eyes. I believe I have so many demons inside me that I can't seem to get rid of them. I have to say they are getting better since I've met you, but they are still there."
"Can I ask what your demons are?"
"I really don't want to talk about them right now, if that's okay. I don't want to ruin this right now." I lean up onto my elbow, looking down into Ian's eyes. "Ian, I have had a pretty screwed up life, but you make me feel something that I could only dream of having. I don't want to lose that. I know I am being selfish but please let me hang on to you for a little longer."
I know I need to tell him. He deserves to know what he is getting himself into. But I just can't do it yet. I can't; I don't want to see a change in how he looks at me, and I don't want his pity or maybe even disgust. I'm not ready to lose his friendship. It means too much to me; I don't want to feel dead again. I just want to be loved a little longer. I know I have to tell him, just not now.
"Parker, I'm not going anywhere. You need to trust me with that."
I lie back on Ian's chest, breathing in his cologne and wrapping my arm over him as he pulls me closer into his side; I'm now cocooned into him; he's my anchor. I'm at peace for now. I love the way he holds me in his arms.
"You say that now, but you don't know."
"Damn it, Parker!" Ian raises his voice, and I jump. "If you can't trust me, then why are we together?"
"Maybe I should just leave. That would probably be for the best." How can I tell anyone what was happening to me? Its has been going on for so long that I feel so dirty and ashamed; as if no one would understand. Was it my fault? Did I do something to encourage him somehow? Is this what all fathers do to their daughters? An unspoken secret. I was terrified to even think about the possibility of being taken away and having to live with strangers that could do worse things to me back then. It was all I knew. He's my father and I love him, don't I? I'm so confused. I knew there was a light at the end of the tunnel, and I knew when I was old enough I would escape this nightmare. I had once hinted about what was happening to me to one of my teachers, but my father is such a likeable man no one ever believed me; they thought I was looking for attention after my mom died.
I sit up and start to throw the blankets back.
"Damn it. No. don't leave." He grabs hold of my shoulders. "Parker, I don't want you to go. You are constantly running. I'm not letting you run from me again."
"Ian, you have put me on such a high pedestal that when I fall I am going to shatter like glass. You can put me back together again, but I will never be the same. I know I have to tell you, but I also know it will be the end of us and I just want to hang onto it for just a little longer. Please?"
"Fine, but you are going to have to learn to trust too. I'm not going anywhere, Parker."
"I know and I am trying, but trust comes very hard for me. Please give me a little time." God, what am I doing, how can I stay when I know how this is going to end, but I love him, my mind can only handle so much. I have quietly held my secret for so long, trying to look and act like a normal eighteen year old. Maybe I can keep doing that. For Ian I can try.
I lay back down in bed as Ian wraps his arms around me, pulling me into his chest kissing my ear lightly. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to fight. I am just finding it hard not knowing. I know you are hurting, I just want to be able to take your pain away."
"I know. I know you want me to be 'fixed' but I don't think it is going to be as ea
sy as you think. When I talked demons and broken, that's me; look in Wikipedia and there will be a picture of me under both of those titles."
He chuckles.
"Good night." I say.
Chapter 12
Meeting the Family
Parker
The next morning I look over at Ian, smiling and thinking. I never thought I would be lying next to a man especially a man; like Ian. He is such a loving and caring man. Is it really possible that I haven't seen any real flaws? Well, except for one; he is a little controlling and demanding, but that is just to take care of me. Is this what it means to be cherished? He does try to show me that I am worthy, He has told me several times that admires my ambition and aspirations to make it on my own and endeavor to reach my goals. of whatever I want to do. I know he just wants to protect me, maybe being controlling and demanding is a part of being in love.
"What are you smiling at?" His voice was a low gentle rumble. I look over at him, he looks so young laying there. Not a care in the world, he is totally relaxed and it shows on his face.
"How do you know I am smiling, with your eyes closed?" I say softly, looking at his face.
"I know everything." He opens his eyes to look at me.
"I am just thinking how lucky I am," I say, in such a quiet voice that it's was almost a whisper.
"That goes both ways, baby girl. Do you have any idea what you do to me?"
We lie in bed talking for a little longer before we have to get ready for the book signing.
Stolen Innocence Page 9
