by E. N. Joy
For Saved, hearing the sounds of the crackling and breaking branches hadn't alarmed her either-not at first. But then, unless her ears were playing tricks on her, she could have sworn she started hearing the sounds behind her instead of in front of her coming from Puddin'.
Her heart rate picked up pace and so did the speed of her legs getting it through those woods. "Don't look back. Don't look back, just keep it moving," she coached herself. "You got this. You got this. There is no turning back now."
Saved refused to look over her shoulder to confirm the sounds that seemed to be getting louder and closer. She refused to confirm that perhaps someone or something was behind her. Turns out, she didn't have to.
"Hey," Saved finally heard a male voice call out from behind her. Puddin' obviously hadn't heard it, because she didn't miss a step as she ran on.
Saved kept running right behind Puddin' as if she hadn't heard a thing either. She even tried to talk herself out of what she'd heard. "The devil is a liar," she mumbled to herself. "There's no one there, Saved, just keep running. Just keep running."
She hadn't run more than a few more steps when the male voice called out again; this time much louder. "Hey, you two, stop!"
Both girls stopped in their tracks. All the crackling sounds and the sound of breaking branches with the girl's feet hitting them as they ran toward freedom all stopped. There was silence from nature. Just the sound of hard breathing that sounded like it was coming from someone who'd been running for their life.
Without turning around, Saved closed her eyes and prayed that the voice was that of God Himself. And if she was lucky enough, it would be coming from a burning bush in those woods.
Chapter Five
"Hey!" the voice repeated again.
Saved slowly turned around. Her heart was beating like an African drum. Her eyes were closed. She really didn't want to open her eyes to see what was in store for her and her new friend. All she could picture was a guard standing there with the barrel of a gun pointed at her. Whether she gave in freely or not, she feared she'd still receive a warning shot-a flesh wound at the very least.
She'd heard from one of the girls at juvie that a bullet shot burned. It was like a hot dagger ripping through the flesh. Come to think of it, she'd experienced that feeling before. She'd experienced it the very first time her father ripped through her. His grown manhood tearing apart her entire seven year old childhood.
"Hey," her father had whispered to her after all the other kids had left her birthday party. Saved was up in her room, sitting on the floor and admiring all of her gifts that surrounded her.
"Daddy, look at all these presents." Saved's eyes glazed with excitement as she admired the clothes, play jewelry and outfits she'd received.
"Yes, baby. That's nice, but Daddy has a special treat for his little girl."
"But I already opened the gift you and Mommy gave me." Saved dug through her pile and pulled out the black Barbie doll she'd been begging for every time she saw the commercial come on television.
"No, not that. It's something I forgot to give to you earlier at the birthday party.
Saved just remembered her father looking at her so hungrily; like some of the kids had been looking at her big Barbie cake until she finally cut it and they ate it.
"Well, well where is it?" Saved asked with a stutter. She didn't realize at the time, but even then God had blessed her with a spirit of discernment. Even as a seven year old child she felt in her spirit that something wasn't right. "Does Mommy have it? Let's go get it from her." Saved jumped up off the floor.
"No, Mommy doesn't have it. Mommy is in bed. I told her to take a little nap. She's tired from all that hard work it took giving you a birthday party. I told Mommy not to worry about things; that I'd take care of you while she rested-good care of you." Saved's father extended his hand. "Now come on, let's go get that present."
Hesitantly, Saved got up off the floor. She placed her tiny hand into her father's and he led her to their attached garage, slowly and quietly closing the door behind them. He then pulled his car keys from his pocket, unlocked the door and instructed her to get into the backseat, where he climbed in behind her.
"Baby girl, I've been wanting to give this to you all day, but I couldn't," he'd whispered in Saved's ear.
Breathing-there was heavy breathing Saved remembered. It was almost identical to the sound of the breathing that now filled the space of the woods. Her father was breathing heavily and stroking his manhood that he'd released from his boxer shorts.
"Daddy," Saved had said, her insides not feeling so good.
"Shhh, shhh, baby." He put his index finger to his lips. "You have to be quiet. You don't want to wake your mother," he explained. "Mommy will be jealous if she knew I was giving you the gift I'm about to give you."
Saved shook her head as fear found a place in her innocent eyes. "Then I don't want it. I don't want to make Mommy mad or jealous," Saved replied.
Her father began to play along. "Yeah, maybe you are right. If Mommy found out, she would be mad all right. She won't be mad at me for giving it to you, but she'll be mad at you for taking it. She'll probably put you on punishment and take all your other nice presents away from you."
Saved's little mind wandered back up to her bedroom floor where all her new presents waited for her. She'd barely gotten to play with any of them. She didn't want her mother to take them away already. "She'd take them all?" Saved questioned her father.
"Yes. But what I have for you is better than all of them put together," he pressed.
Young Saved twisted her lips up in contemplation.
"I mean, if she found out about the secret present, I could try to get her not to take all your other ones away, but we'll probably just end up having a great big fight and end up getting a divorce. If that happens, you'll probably never see Daddy again. And that will make you and Mommy sad. I don't want you and Mommy to be sad. Do you?"
Saved thought for a moment and then shook her head. "No, I don't want Mommy to be sad." At this point she was already sad; sad and confused.
"But then again, I'll be sad if you don't take the present I have for you." He feigned a frown.
A grown man's foreplay with a little girl was telling her why she shouldn't tell on him for having sex with her. At the time the little girl has no idea what sex is; not really. Sure Saved had snuck and watched a Rated R scene in a movie or two. But in real life, sex was a scary thing. To a child whose innocence is being taken from them in the backseat of their father's car-by their own father-it's a nightmare.
Once Saved's father saw that he'd convinced his daughter to 'take the present,' and more importantly not tell anybody about it, he lifted her cute little yellow sundress that had straps that tied and rested on each of her little shoulders. It had ruffles at the bottom of it that Saved had loved rubbing her hands down all day. It was the most beautiful sundress she'd ever seen. Now her father's hands gripped the ruffles, above her waste. After pulling her pink flowery panties to the side, he'd placed her onto his lap in a backwards position. It was as if he didn't want to see his little girl's face while he penetrated her.
Saved remembered how the women in the movies and the soap operas her mother watched had always looked as though they were enjoying this sex stuff. Little moans, groans and whimpers of ecstasy had wriggled through their lips. Not Saved. Only screams had torn through her mouth, until her father nearly suffocated her to death by placing his hand over her mouth.
She'd wanted to tell him that she couldn't breathe. His hand was so big that it was covering her nose as well. It was so big. He was so big. She was just a little girl.
Thinking back at it now, Saved couldn't believe he'd left the warmth of a grown woman to come get sex from her; his seven-year-old daughter. He'd told her it was the dress she'd worn that day that made him want her; that little summer halter dress that Saved and her mother had fought over in the store.
"Mommy, please, please! That's the dress I want
to wear for my birthday," Saved had pleaded in the store.
Her mother took the yellow sundress off the rack and dangled it in the air. "Umm, um, Saved." She shook her head in disapproval. "This dress is far too grown up looking for a seven year old. I don't even know why they make this kind of stuff for kids. I mean, I thought little girls and their dolls were supposed to have matching outfits-not little girls and their mamma."
"Please, Mommy. That's the one I really want. I'll just wear it once and then you can throw it away."
Saved's mother looked at the price tag on the dress. "Honey, this ain't no throw away money."
Saved was quick on her feet to come up with another solution. "Then we can keep the tags on it and you can take it back right after my party. I promise not to spill punch or cake or ice-cream or get it dirty or nothing," the seven year old bargained.
Her mother sighed and once again shook her head at the dress. "I still don't know why a designer would make such a mini version of a grown woman dress and how a mother in her right mind could allow her daughter to wear it. Dresses like this and two-piece swimsuits; I can not understand for the life of me why women put their children in them."
She may not have understood, but it was Saved's birthday, so she decided to make this one exception this one time. Needless to say, Saved won the battle. She walked out of that store winning her first battle ever with her mother. And as suggested, her mother had thrown the dress away, clueless that she was also throwing away remnants of her father's assault against her.
The dress. Saved's entire life changed all because of a dress. It went from her being raped as a child, to her mother finding out and murdering her father, to nobody in her family wanting her, to being dumped in foster care, to turning tricks, to ending up in juvie to now about to be shot down like a dog in the middle of the woods.
Chapter Six
Standing their in the woods with her eyes still closed, sweat was pouring from Saved's forehead. She didn't even realize she'd been sweating. She'd just been running; running for her life as if she'd been running away from her father all those years ago. Running for her freedom-a second chance. And now, just like the snap of a twig beneath her foot, it was all about to end.
I shall fear no evil; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me, Saved prayed silently and then decided to open her eyes and face her fate head on. For years her father had molested her from behind; too coward to look into the eyes of his sin that she hoped had sent him straight to hell. Which disabled her from looking into his and seeing all the evil that lived in him. It had disabled her from seeing what was behind the eyes of what was killing her inside. Not this time. Saved would at least treat herself, this time around, to looking death in the eyes. So on that thought, she opened them.
"Ugghh," Saved let out loudly and dang near gave Puddin' a heart attack. It was less of a scream and more of an irritated gasp. Then instantly she let out a sigh.
To Puddin' it almost sounded like a sigh of relief. "Do...do you know this guy?" she stuttered.
Saved spoke to Puddin' over her shoulder. "Unfortunately, yeah, I know this fool. He's in juvie too-with the boys of course."
"Why I gotta be a fool?" the dude who owned the voice that had stopped Saved and Puddin' in their tracks asked. He then admired Puddin'. "Oooh, an older woman. You wouldn't happen to like younger dudes would you? You know, like one of them cougars or something. I mean, you are in the jungle and all." He let out a laugh.
"Is this guy for real?" Puddin' asked, squinting up her nose as if a skunk was next to her.
"I hate to say it, but yeah," Saved answered, "he's very much for real. And I'd love to stick around so you could see more of his one man show, but we kind of have to get out of here, remember?" Saved turned back around and took a couple more steps.
"Hey," he called out once again, this time directly at Saved. "Aren't you going to introduce me to your friend?"
Saved sucked her teeth and threw her hands on her hips hard as she stopped and stood next to Puddin'. "Okay, now you can't really be for real." Realizing that time was wasting, she gave in. "Puddin' this is Junie. Like I said, he's in juvie-with the boys."
"But I'm all man." Junie stepped in and extended his hand to Puddin'.
"Nice meeting you, Junie," Puddin' entertained. "But we gotta go." Puddin threw up the peace sign and she and Saved started with a light jog to ease into another full out run.
"Hey, aren't you headed in the wrong direction?" Junie asked after the girls began to take off again. "I'd hate for me to have to send one of the guards back here to fire two warning shots into y'all's back," he threatened.
The girls once again stopped in their tracks and turned to face Junie.
"You wouldn't," Saved almost dared him through slitted eyes.
He kept silent. Didn't say a word. Just stood there as if he held their destiny in his hands. A smug look was plastered on his pale white skin. His blue eyes tinged with glory, as his thick, just barely a unibrow, eyebrows furrowed. Even with his thick eyebrows almost forming into a unibrow, Junie was easy on the eyes. He stood about five feet, ten inches tall with a slender frame. Although in normal circumstances he didn't appear threatening, his current verbal insinuation, in fact, made him appear just the opposite. And the terrified look on Saved's face worried if his threat was idle, or if he was serious. She couldn't help but wonder what her fate might be either way.
"Relax. Don't worry," Junie said as he broke out in a slight chuckle. "I had you there for a minute, though, didn't I?" He chuckled again, but neither Saved nor Puddin' found the humor in his little act. "Don't look so intense," Junie told the girls. "Your secret is safe with me. I won't rat you out. You can go on Scott free."
Once again Saved turned to continue her trek. Once again, it didn't take long for Junie to make another comment that would stop her in her tracks.
"But you have to do something for me of course." Junie rubbed his hands together as if preparing for the last supper.
Both Puddin' and Saved sighed and looked at each other, then to Junie. A sinister smile crept across Junie's face as he grabbed his manhood.
"And what might that be?" Saved took the liberty of asking. "What do I have to do to get you to keep your mouth shut?"
He looked her dead in her eyes and said, "Take me with you." His smile that had once been perceived as sinister was now a mile long grin.
Saved looked to Puddin' to see if she would grant Junie permission to join them. After all, it was her brother's house they were going to.
Puddin' shrugged. "It's up to you," Puddin' told Saved. "It's your fate in his hands, not mine. I'm out of here either way it goes; with or without you." She looked to Junie. "And with or without him."
Saved looked to Junie and wondered what harm it could be in letting him come along. She weighed the cons first. For one, the more of them there was, the more they would stand out. With just her and Puddin', nothing would seem too out of the ordinary. Throwing a guy into the mix could complicate things; a white guy with two black girls at that. But then again, Junie was a low key type of fella. He probably wouldn't bring that much attention to himself. He wasn't loud and rude with a ghetto mentality like some of the other kids at juvie; at least, he'd never been as far as Saved knew.
She didn't know him all like that, though. She only knew of him because her old roommate had a major crush on him after meeting him at last year's outing. Her and Junie used to write letters to each other with pictures of themselves in them. Her roommate had let Saved read a letter or two. On paper and in the pictures, he was aiight, and Saved had to admit, in person he wasn't' that bad either. So, after sucking her teeth and rolling her eyes she stated, "Come on, boy. Let's go."
And on that note, the three made their way through the woods. After about twenty minutes of hiking through the wooded area, Junie finally decided to ask, "Hey, where are we going anyway?" They were no longer running at this point; just making it through the woods the best they could.
"Does it
even matter at this point?" Saved replied. "You might have wanted to ask that about a mile ago."
"Columbus," Puddin' answered as she continued to lead the way. Why she was the line leader was probably just a matter of her being the oldest of the three; and this being her idea. Ironically, of the three, she was the only one who wasn't from Cleveland. Using a sixth sense, she felt her way through the wooded area determined to get to where they needed to be. "Wait, you guys hear that?"
They all stopped and listened. There was some swishing sounds and the sound of a horn.
"Traffic," Junie replied.
"And the sound of traffic means there's a road," Puddin' said as she began trudging through the woods again, Junie and Saved on her heels. "And where there's a road, there's a way."
"Where is your car parked anyway?" Saved asked. "Because even once we hit the road, we are going to have to figure out exactly what road we are on and try to find your car. Once we hit your wheels, we should be good to go."
There was silence as Puddin' continued walking, pretending not to have heard a word Saved had said. But Saved was not going to be ignored.
"Uh, hello," Saved said. "Car; where is it parked?"
"Who said anything about going to a car?" Puddin' answered.
"You're kidding me, right?" Saved asked. "You don't have a car waiting?"
Agitated, Puddin' turned around to face Saved. "What? You think this is some movie where everything is supposed to be lined up and set up just right? All I promised you was a way out, and I didn't say it would be an easy way out at that."
"Then how did you plan on getting us to Columbus?" Saved questioned.
"I didn't say I was going to get you anywhere. I said I was going to Columbus. Now how we get there...well, we'll just have to cross that bridge when we get to it." Puddin' turned back around and started her trek again. "Come on, we're almost to the road. The sound is getting louder, which means we're getting closer."
The sounds of real life were more evident now that the girls' heart races were pretty much at ease. There was nothing like a light being at the end of the tunnel. They could now hear the tweeting of birds that just moments ago their heart beats had drowned out the sounds of. They literally hadn't had time to stop and smell the flowers, but now all the wildflowers they'd zoomed pass in the woods were clear-no longer a blur. Their nostrils acknowledged their scents silently.
