“Uh… But I don’t know what happened.”
“He called me fat so you have to yell at him.”
“But…”
“Seriously, Neal; just give me the phone and I’ll explain what happened.” Desmond holds his hand out towards Neal.
“So you can convince that you did nothing wrong and he’ll take your side? No, thank you.”
Desmond rolls his eyes.
“You wanted him to talk to me, didn’t you? How can he do that if you won’t give me the phone?”
Neal glares at Desmond again. He opens his mouth to reply, but stops when Alex starts talking.
“Why don’t you put the phone on speaker then? That way, you’ll hear everything that’s going on.”
“I guess.” Neal huffs heavily, but eventually does what Alex suggested and puts the phone on speaker. He folds his arms across his chest and shifts further along the couch when Desmond sits down.
Desmond sighs lightly and shakes his head.
“So, why don’t you tell me what happened?”
“He called me fat.”
“For the last time, I did no such thing.”
“Okay, but…”
“You did.”
“Hey!” Alex thinks he might have thrown something or stamped his foot on the ground if he was at home, but he’s far away right now so yelling down the phone is the best he can do. “You already said that, Neal, so why don’t you let Desmond talk now?”
Neal huffs, but doesn’t appear to offer any objection.
Desmond looks at Neal for a second before speaking.
“So what happened was…”
Neal opens his mouth to offer his opinion, but quickly closes his mouth when Desmond points at him.
“Not one word.” Desmond narrows his gaze slightly before returning to addressing Alex. “His tailor refused to make him a new suit because he’d outgrow it. I agreed.”
“See.” Neal glares at Desmond for a second. “He called me fat.”
“Uh…” Alex frowns slightly. “I don’t think he did.”
Neal whines heavily.
“I knew you’d take his side.”
“I’m not taking his side, Neal. I’m just saying that I think you heard something that wasn’t there.”
“But he…” Neal sighs heavily and turns his head away. “It’s not fair.”
Desmond runs a hand down his face.
“Look, Neal; I’m sorry you thought I called you fat, but…”
“Not that.” Neal sighs lightly and turns back to look at Desmond. He looks down at the phone for a second too because Alex is just as much a part of this conversation. “They don’t think I should be there.”
“Who?”
“The people at work.” Neal looks down at the floor. “They all look at me like… They don’t think I should be part of anything. They don’t think I should have this time off and immediately be able to jump straight back in. They don’t think I care enough about my job anymore. They think I only care about the babies now.”
“No one thinks that, Neal.” Desmond reaches out and puts a hand on Neal’s shoulder.
“They do.” Neal looks up at Desmond. “The way they looked at me…”
“Neal.” Desmond shifts across the couch and pulls Neal towards him.
“It’s not fair.” Neal rests his head on Desmond’s shoulder, but turns his gaze towards the phone. “Why would… It doesn’t have to mean that I’ll care less about my job. I love my job. Now I can’t even get a new suit made for work.”
“I know you love it.” Desmond presses a soft kiss to the top of Neal’s head. “Alex knows that too, right?”
“Yes, of course.” Alex doesn’t hesitate before answering because he knows for sure that it’s the truth. “But…”
“What?” Neal’s eyes widen slightly and he sits straight up. “You think I don’t care?”
“I’m not trying to say that, even for a second. I just think that… you’ll come back and they have no idea, we have no idea, how different you’ll be after having the babies.”
“I can do it! I’ll be like I was before. No, I’ll be better.”
“It’s not me you have to convince, Neal.”
“But it is.” Neal looks down at his hands for a second before looking up again. “You never thought I was good enough.”
“Neal.” Alex rubs his forehead. “I never thought that you weren’t good enough. I always saw how amazing you were. I just thought you didn’t put enough effort in. I thought you didn’t try hard enough for everything that you could do.”
“And now they think that too, but I’ll prove you all wrong. I can do this. I know I can do this. It matters to me. It still matters to me.”
“You shouldn’t do this for us, Neal. You shouldn’t do this for anyone but yourself.”
“This is for me, too, and it’s for the babies. I need them to see… me making partner at the firm, it’s still a dream for me. They’ll know that and I don’t want them to think it’s okay to give up on your dreams. I want it and I’m going for it. It’s even more important now. I’m going to do everything I can to get it.”
“Okay.” Alex nods slowly- he knows there’s no point because Neal can’t see him, but he feels like it’s the only thing he can do.
“I know you can’t help me. I know you never would and I’m not going to ask for that. I just need for you to support me.” Neal looks over at Desmond. “Both of you.”
Desmond smiles softly and touches a hand to Neal’s cheek.
“You know we’ll always be there.”
“If it’s what you want, Neal, I want it for you.”
Neal sniffles a little and looks down at the phone.
“Just come home. I miss you.”
“I…” Alex takes a deep breath. “I miss you too and I want to be there, but it’s still so soon. You know this. You know we have more things to work out.”
“I…” Neal breathes deeply for a minute because he knows he’ll start crying if he doesn’t and he doesn’t want to cry right now.
Desmond wraps his arms around Neal and kisses the top of Neal’s head.
“I just want things to be better.” Neal buries his head in Desmond’s neck.
“It will be.” Alex wipes his own eyes. “We’ll be okay, I promise. We just need a bit more time.”
Neal mutters something into Desmond’s neck.
“I think he’s trying to say ‘thank you’.” Desmond runs a hand down Neal’s arm.
Alex smiles softly for a moment before speaking again.
“Is that what this is really about?” Alex hesitates for a moment before speaking again. “Is this because of our problems? And not really because Desmond called you fat?”
“Well, he did,” Neal mutters.
“Neal.”
“Okay.” Neal looks up at Desmond. “I think you were right in the things you were saying.”
“Yeah.” Desmond kisses the top of Neal’s head. He looks down when Neal hasn’t spoken after a minute. He smiles fondly when he sees that Neal’s eyes are closed. He reaches out and picks up the phone. “Hey. Neal’s sleeping now.”
“Well, it must have been a long day for him.”
“It was a long day for me so he must have found it a hell of a lot harder.” Desmond looks down at Neal and smiles fondly. “Thanks for this: listening and everything.”
“It’s okay. I just wish I could be there. I wish I could do more.”
“You helped, even from so far away, and that means a lot for all of us. We’re going to be okay.”
“I think I finally believe you.”
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
Desmond hears the door open; he doesn’t even have time to process that whole thought of Alex being home before Neal is jumping up from beside him and running towards the front door. He stands up and slowly follows Neal. He stands a short distance away and just watches Neal and Alex for a moment- they’re clinging to each other and he swears he sees them both crying.
“I’m gonna…” Desmond doesn’t finish that sentence- he doesn’t need to; it’s not as if Neal and Alex are listening to him. He watches them for a few more seconds before walking upstairs. He wants to stay, of course he does, but he knows this is a conversation they need to have between themselves.
Desmond paces up and down in his bedroom. He lasts for fifteen minutes without thinking about going downstairs and another five without actually doing it. He hesitates for a few seconds outside the door before stepping into the living room. He glances over to see Neal and Alex sat together, talking. He doesn’t think they notice him, but that doesn’t matter because he’s soon rushing through into the kitchen- he doesn’t want to disturb them, but he needed to see that they were talking and that things were going well. He stays in the kitchen for a while before going back upstairs. He doesn’t get involved in the conversation because it isn’t his place, but he now he can’t stop himself from finding out what’s happening. He passes through the living room several more times while Neal and Alex are talking- he sees them clinging to each other and hold hands and crying; he hears the shouting and the screaming and the pleading and he can practically feel the animosity when certain names are brought up. He’s only really made aware of how long the conversation has been going on for when he feels his stomach rumble and looks outside to see it’s starting to go dark. He wonders if he should disturb Neal and Alex to ask if they want dinner, too, but maybe he should leave them to it- this is a conversation that probably wouldn’t be helped by being broken in half. He decides that he needs to ask, though, because eating is important and… damn it, he just needs to speak to them. He hovers by the living room door for a few moments before speaking.
“I didn’t wanna disturb you or anything, but…”
“It’s okay,” Alex mutters. He looks down at where Neal is resting against (sleeping on) his shoulder for a second before looking up at Desmond. “It’s not over. We both have a lot of things to work through, but we’ve said everything we need to say.”
“All right then.” Desmond can barely contain his sense of relief at hearing that. “So… uh… It’s getting late and I’m hungry so I was gonna make dinner if you wanted something.”
“Oh.” Alex frowns slightly; he hadn’t realized how late it was, but now that he really thinks about it he can definitely tell that he’s hungry. He smiles softly and nods. “Yeah, I could go for some food.”
“You think we should ask Neal, too?”
“No. We’ll let him sleep for a while longer.” Alex presses a soft kiss to Neal’s forehead before gently lying Neal down on the couch. He stands up and walks over to Desmond.
Desmond smiles brightly and takes hold of Alex’s hand.
“You wanna come help then?”
“Oh, so now you’re putting me to work?” Alex raises an eyebrow.
“You’ve been away for too long; you owe us.”
Alex laughs softly as he follows Desmond into the kitchen.
“So how long have you got here again?” Desmond asks as he turns on the oven.
“Just a few days. It’s not really long enough, I know, but…”
“You’re here now and that’s what counts. I’ll call Anna later then.”
“Why? Is something wrong?”
“No. I thought you might wanna see the kids before you head off again and if you’ve only got a couple of days then we can’t hang around. Unless you didn’t want…”
“Oh, no; I’d love to see them.” Alex smiles brightly and steps in. “I missed them.”
“They missed you, too. Especially Max. Apparently, Alex tells much better stories than Mommy or Daddy.”
“And Neal?”
“Oh, yeah- even better stories that Neal.” Desmond presses a soft kiss to Alex’s lips. “We might be able to swing by and see Lukas and the twins after school, but they’ve got a lot of things on.”
“I can call at least.”
“They’d like that.” Desmond busies himself with making dinner (Alex helps a little, but mostly he lets Desmond get on with it). “So what happens now?”
Alex knows that Desmond isn’t talking about dinner, not even about tonight or his time at home- he’s asking about the whole future.
“We talk more.” Alex shrugs lightly. “It’s important, more than anything else, that we be honest with each other. We weren’t saying a lot of things before because… There’ll be bad things, I know, but we shouldn’t let that stop us from enjoying the good things too. I know we can handle it because, at the end of the day, we still love each other.”
“All right then.”
“That means you, too. You shouldn’t be in the middle, none of us should. It’s still about all three of us or all five if you count the babies; nine if you count the other children too. I think we forgot that for a while and we let other people get involved, too.”
Desmond closes his eyes for a second and turns away; Alex is right- other people did get involved- but he doesn’t want to talk about that now because it’ll likely cause another fight.
“Boris is my boss so he gets to be in charge of my career. He’s also my friend so he will be in my life. He doesn’t get a say in my personal life and if he was really my friend he’d just support me. The things he said about Neal…”
“You agree with them.” Desmond regrets those words as soon as he’s said them, but it’s too late to take them back. He turns to face Alex. “You said so yourself.”
“Yes. Maybe, but he shouldn’t have said them so…”
“Publicly?”
“Yes,” Alex mutters. “That wasn’t right and I shouldn’t have told Neal that it was, but Neal said things too. What he was talking about… That year almost tore us all apart, you know that, and if he keeps bringing it up then… I think back and I would handle things differently.”
“Have you tried telling him that? If you’re annoyed at him because you think he’s still mad at you for that, shouldn’t he still be annoyed at you for seeming like you thought it was all okay?”
“Maybe.” Alex shrugs.
“He’s not mad at you anymore, I can tell you that for sure, but losing the promotion you’ve been working hard your whole life for like that isn’t easy to forget.”
“But he can’t keep bringing it up. It doesn’t do any good. He needs to…”
“Learn the right time to say the right things and when to shut the hell up, I know. He’s trying, at least, and now he knows how important it is to you he’ll try harder. You can’t expect him to stop saying stupid shit immediately, though. And I guess he wouldn’t be our Neal if he didn’t run his mouth occasionally, but now you’ve had this conversation, I think he’ll understand how important it is that you two talk about this first.”
“I hope so.” Alex walks over and wraps his arms around Desmond’s waist. He rests his head on Desmond’s shoulder. “I don’t want to lose him.”
“You won’t.” Desmond rests his hands on Alex’s lower back. “Now you both know what you really need from each other. Now you know what’s important.”
“I think we always knew what was most important, though.”
“It’s not me, is it?”
“Well, you’re second.”
“I’ll only settle for that if it’s the babies that are first.”
“Well, then, maybe you’re third. It’s the babies first, then cookies, then you.”
Desmond laughs softly and shakes his head.
“I didn’t think you liked cookies that much.”
“Neal insisted on cookies making the list. I’d have put you second though and maybe cookies after that.”
“That’s good to know because I have a bit of a treat for you.” Desmond kisses the top of Alex’s head before walking over to a cupboard at the far side of the room. He rummages in the back of the cupboard and eventually pulls out a small box, which he hands to Alex.
Alex frowns heavily, but laughs when he opens the box.
“That’s the las
t of the cookies my mom made with the honey you sent over. I managed to sneak it away from Neal.”
“Risky.”
“Worth it, though.” Desmond smiles softly. “You might wanna eat that now otherwise you’re not gonna get the chance.”
Alex nods briefly and starts eating the cookie (it’s delicious, by the way). He’s barely put the last piece in his mouth when….
“Is that what I think it is?”
Desmond’s head snaps up and he sees Neal stood in the doorway to the kitchen.
“Do you have a sixth sense about this?”
Neal pointedly ignores Desmond’s comment to focus on Alex and consider what he’s just seen.
“You said there weren’t any left.”
“Uh… I thought it might be nice to save one for Alex.”
Neal narrows his gaze at Desmond for a second before walking over and kissing Alex full on the lips. He pulls back a moment later and nods briefly.
“Yep. Still tastes good.”
“The cookie?” Alex mutters when he’s finally regained the ability to speak (because, oh my God, Neal just kissed him and that hasn’t happened in such a long time and he’s almost forgotten how much he really likes that).
“That too.” Neal grins and shrugs.
Desmond raises an eyebrow.
“Everything’s back to how it was before then?”
“Nope.” Neal shakes his head. “Everything’s better.”
CHAPTER NINETEEN
Desmond doesn’t immediately realize what has woken him up, but then he hears the phone ringing. He groans softly and reaches out to grab the phone off the bedside table. For half a second, he thinks about throwing the phone across the room, against the wall, just so it’ll stop making that stupid sound, but he has to answer it because surely it’s important, at this time of day.
“Hello?”
“Don’t let Neal go on Twitter or Facebook.”
“Alex?” Desmond frowns heavily. “What are you…”
“Please.”
“Okay.” Desmond rubs his eyes. “So what happened?”
“I…” Alex looks down as he wonders how to say all of this. “Just… Not now.”
“Okay, do you want…” Desmond doesn’t get to finish that sentence before Alex hangs up. He’s far too tired to even be annoyed about that right now so he just drops his phone back on the bedside table. He turns on his side, intending to go back to sleep, but instead he finds Neal staring at him. “Hey.”
The Unexpected: An Mpreg Romance Page 9
