by Taylor Hart
Immediately he laughed, but he caught some water from the hot tub and snorted it up. All that snorting and laughing made him cough even harder.
Not realizing she was this funny, she grinned. “You like that joke?”
His blue eyes sparkled, and Kat felt her stomach flip-flop. He got a hold of himself and leaned back. “Yeah, I like it.”
“I got more.” She gave him a splash. “What were you saying?”
“In football they have a first-string quarterback and a second-string quarterback.”
“You must have played quarterback. You’re bossy enough.”
Hesitating for a second, he grinned. “Yes.” He held up a hand. “My freshman year in high school, I was second string. The coach kept telling me to try for another position. He thought I would be a great running back, but I wouldn’t budge because I knew that first-string quarterback was my position.”
“Okay.” She had no idea what he was trying to say.
When he turned to face her, his lip twitched, and she could see the dimple in his left cheek. “I can’t believe I’m willing to give up the position I want to be your friend, but I think I might be.” If he could only be in her life and be her friend, he still wanted that.
Her heart rate kicked up. “I don’t understand.”
Slowly, he reached up and moved the hair out of her eyes. “I’ll take the position you give me.”
This was insane. “Okay, you got first-string friend. The position is yours.”
He was close. Kissable close. How had he managed to get so close when she’d purposefully moved away from him? His lip twitched up. “I might even consider second-string boyfriend.”
It was undeniable. She wanted to kiss him. There was an unstoppable chemistry between them. She really wanted to, but her mind was whirling with confusion. “I can’t.”
Cam grinned and pulled his hand up. “Like I said, I’ll take whatever position you give me, even if I don’t prefer it.” He let out a breath. “And I’m not used to that.”
How had he done that? Gotten her to that point and then backed off. Her heart was racing. Then she looked down at her bubbling clothes and began to giggle at this whole insane thing.
He glanced at her. “Why are you giggling over there?”
She relaxed another notch and let herself slide deeper in, pushing down the undulating T-shirt and shorts. “I look like a Sumo wrestler.”
Looking at her poofy shorts, he grinned, slipping into the water deeper. “Ah, this feels good.”
“It does feel good.”
He closed his eyes, and she watched him, liking that she could look at him without him looking at her. His beard did look a lot better all trimmed up. Not to mention how nice his face was. He had high cheekbones and dark, bushy eyebrows that matched his beard. And those eyes … A flutter went through her, and she closed her own eyes. “Aren’t you going to get in trouble for using the house like this?”
He hesitated before answering. “Nope, the owner told me to just be responsible.”
“Must be nice.”
“Yeah, it is.”
It was nice to just talk to him about normal stuff, not be all intense. But she couldn’t stop herself from telling him who she really was. “I met Steven when I was in the psych ward.”
For a moment he looked confused. Then sat up straighter in the hot tub. “What?”
Averting her eyes, she focused on the water bubbling through her fingers. “You wanted details.”
“I do.”
“My first semester in London, I was alone. I didn’t know if I could handle the pressure. I didn’t have anyone to talk to. Things have always been distant with my parents.” She shrugged. “I was weak. I broke. That’s where I met Steven—he helped me. He was doing psych rounds at the hospital I was in.”
Cam didn’t say anything.
It was a relief to tell him the truth. Eventually, she looked up at him.
Cam blinked, and she saw what appeared to be compassion. His brow creased. “I’m glad he was there to help you.”
This had not been the reaction she thought she’d get. But she hadn’t even known she would tell Cam. The heaviness in her chest dissipated, and she blinked. “Thank you.”
Comfortable silence circled them.
She closed her eyes and took in a long breath. “I like having a first-string friend.”
He gave a soft smile. “How did Steven help you?”
“I don’t understand.”
“Specifically, how did he help you?”
“Oh.” She thought about those months he visited her every day. “He listened. He helped me understand tactics for dealing with people.”
“Like wearing fake rings.”
She let out a light laugh. “Kind of, I guess. Sometimes you have to protect yourself from possible pain.”
“Hmm.”
“What?”
“Nothing. I just … I just think that every relationship could have pain. I don’t know how you protect yourself without shutting yourself off.”
Out of the blue, Kat was struck with an epiphany.
Neither of them spoke for a moment.
“Are you okay, Kat?”
“Yes. I—you’re right, I do shut myself off. I hadn’t realized that.” She looked at him, his face flush from the heat. “That’s how I cope.”
He nodded. “We all do. I have since my dad…” He trailed off.
Understanding filled her. Then she had to ask. “So what do you do about the pain when you’re not fake engaged to a psychologist?”
A tiny smile played at Cam’s lips. “You go to God.”
Nodding, she felt peace spread through her. For a moment, they both stared into each other’s eyes.
She blinked and looked away, staring at the sunset. “It’s so … peaceful and gorgeous out here. You probably never want to leave this view.”
“It is beautiful.”
When she turned to look at him, he was looking at her.
He cocked an eyebrow at her. “And I don’t mean the sunset.”
Her insides went gooey and she hated it. How could he get under her skin like this?
She decided she would change the subject. “Tell me, where do you get the inspiration to write?”
After a few seconds, he seemed to consider the question, tilting his head. “Various places, experiences, people.”
“Do you have other songs?”
He grinned. “Yep.”
“Will you sing another one for me?”
“Nope.”
She splashed him. “Yes.”
Laughing, he splashed her back. “No.”
“Why?”
“Because.” He sighed and leaned back, closing his eyes again. “Call me a one-hit wonder.”
She didn’t understand why he was being so weird about this. “What—do you need some compliments? I like your voice. I like your style. I want to hear another song.”
He opened one eye. “Say it again.” His voice was raspy.
Shaking her head, she smiled. “That’s what you wanted, isn’t it.”
He sat up. “No, but I like it.” With a flick of his fingers, he splattered her with water. “C’mon, Kat. Tell me again how wonderful I am.”
She rolled her eyes. “Never mind. I never want to hear another song out of your mouth.”
This made him laugh. “Fine, fine. I’ll sing another song. This song … was written for my first love.”
“The one that left you at the altar.” The words were out before she could stop them.
Giving her a pointed look, he nodded. “Thank you for reminding me.”
She laughed, happier than she’d been in a long time.
He grinned and started to sing. Closing her eyes, she loved the deep tenor of his voice.
He was only got a few verses in when they heard a loud chime from within the house. Cam easily hopped out of the hot tub and picked up a towel, rushing for the sliding glass door. “I ordered pizza. Be right back.”
She grinned to herself, tracking him with her eyes. Okay, Kat didn’t normally consider herself a “follow the guy with her eyes” kind of girl, but she couldn’t deny she’d noticed his muscles. He was ripped.
The odd thing was that he actually had a brain too. Yes, she realized that thought was petty, but in her circles there weren’t guys this good-looking. There were guys that were handsome. Fun. Sophisticated. Her mind flashed to Steven. She should probably call him tonight, but after their previous conversation, she didn’t want to. Did he want space? Would she be bugging him?
Turning away, she chastised herself. What was she doing here with Cam? Could they really be friends?
Just as she rose out of the hot tub, he came back holding waters and napkins in one hand and the pizza in the other. “Oh no. Sit. Let’s relax.”
Automatically, she sat.
Cam settled in, slinging open the pizza and handing her a bottle of water. “Ya know, I’ve been calling in pizza once or twice a week for about a month now, and last week, I found this place. I think you’ll like it.” He held a piece out to her.
She accepted it and took a bite. It was good. She closed her eyes and sat back into the hot tub, hating herself for loving this moment so much.
He nudged her, and before she even opened her eyes, she knew he was close to her. When she did open her eyes, she saw the sun had gone down, and there was barely a whisper of light left. He grinned at her.
She couldn’t stop herself from grinning back, feeling his shoulder against hers.
“It’s good, right?”
It was a magical moment. He stared down at her, and they were within kissing distance. She nodded and swiftly took another bite of pizza. “Best I’ve had.”
Satisfied, he leaned back. “Good.”
They both ate in contented silence.
After a couple of minutes of staring intently at each other, she frowned. “Cam, I know this is going to sound ridiculous, but do I know you from somewhere? Have we met before?”
He didn’t answer right away.
“Cam?”
He raised his eyebrows. “I’d remember a face as beautiful as yours.”
The compliment caught her off guard. “Whatever.”
Slowly, he pushed a strand of wet hair out of her face. “I mean it. I would have.”
Every part of her wanted him to kiss her, but she knew that was wrong. Slowly, she put down her pizza and stood, stepping quickly out and reaching for the towel.
“Hey.” Cam followed her, drying himself off.
“I need to go, Cam.”
“Why?”
Staring back at him, she felt tortured. “Because I have to.” With that, she took off to the sliding door. “I’ll see myself out.”
Chapter 18
Cam heard the front door shut. He’d lost all appetite for the pizza, so he shoved the box over to the table. Every second of the afternoon passed through his mind with crystal clear clarity. Every little laugh. Everything she had said. Every time they’d been locked in some crazy kind of love gaze.
He liked that she’d confided in him. It made him feel … grateful. Trusted.
Guilty.
She didn’t know who he really was. Not really. Not the real him. The one that owned this house. The one that played professional football. Maybe that was the part he liked about her the most. She didn’t know that version of him, but she liked him anyway. His heart plunged down to his gut.
Argh. Cupping his hands, he pulled water onto his face, trying to clear his head. Deep down, he knew this was wrong—all of it. What was he thinking? He was not who he said he was.
It unnerved him that he cared about her this much. It unnerved him that she’d allowed him to see the vulnerable side of her.
An uneasy feeling tugged at him. Maybe it was exactly like his sister had said. Maybe he didn’t like women that long because he could put them back on the shelf whenever he wanted. He’d always been in control of the relationship.
This relationship was far different. Unfortunately, it wasn’t even a real relationship.
Sucking in a breath, he wondered what he should do. He leaned out of the hot tub and grabbed his phone, locating his sister’s number and pressing call.
She answered on the second ring. “It’s about time you called me first.”
Grinning, he ignored her. “I have a situation.”
“Are you in jail?”
“What?”
“Because if you’re in jail, you need to call one of those fancy attorneys you can hire because you probably deserve it.” She sighed. “Man, I should have seen the warning signs.”
“I’m calling you from my cell phone,” he protested. “Obviously, I’m not in jail.”
A soft laugh sounded through the phone. “Whatever. Of course they would let you use your own cell phone. You’re Cameron Cruz, beloved quarterback.”
“That’s the problem.”
“What problem?”
He decided just to dig into the problem. “I met this girl on a canoeing trip, and I like her, but she doesn’t know who I am.”
“Has she been living under a rock?”
He grinned, thinking about how Kat looked with her big black-rimmed glasses on. “She never watches the news.”
Alicia snorted. She was a news fiend. Mostly it was real news—not the junk news about him and other celebrities—but she did keep tabs on him. “So tell her.”
He sighed. “It’s complicated.”
“Why?”
“She has a boyfriend.”
“Oh.”
He sighed again. “But she’s so amazing.”
“Oh dear. You have the same tone you used to use when you would bore me for hours talking about Karen.”
“Do I?”
“Yes. What are you going to do?”
“That’s why I called my older, wiser sister.” He gave a half smile, knowing she loved it when she had a license to be bossy.
“Hmm. Tell me about her.”
So he spent the next twenty minutes telling her about Kat. He told her about the canoe trip, saving her life, and kissing her. He talked about her grandfather and her project to help inner-city kids.
“More on the boyfriend,” she said when he finished.
“Umm …”
“Why does she love him?”
He hesitated. “He helped her out during a hard time in her life.”
“That’s good.”
“Yeah.”
“Where is he now?”
“He’s teaching at CU in Boulder until next week.”
Letting out a soft sigh, Alicia tsked. “Cam, it sounds like you might want to leave this one alone.”
He sighed, knowing in the pit of his stomach that she was right. “I know.”
“You do?”
“Yeah. I like her too much to hurt her.”
She laughed. “Who are you and what have you done with my brother?”
He laughed too. “I don’t know.” After a few moments of quiet, he changed the subject. “Hey, I wrote a song.”
“You did?” She sounded delighted.
“I did.”
“Sing it.”
“No.”
“C’mon, little bro. I’ve heard you sing a million times.”
“Not for a long time.”
She paused. “That’s true. Not for a long time. Sing it for me,” she demanded.
He grinned. Honestly, he wanted to sing it for her. “All right.” So he began to sing, and chills washed over him.
After he finished, Alicia didn’t say anything.
“Ah, sis, you’re making me nervous.”
Then he heard her sniffle. “I’m sorry. It was … it was really good.”
The chills from before intensified.
“Don’t stop seeing this girl.”
“What?”
“Any woman that can make you write a song like that is worth fighting for.”
* * *
By the t
ime he got out of the hot tub, every part of him was pruned. He left the mess and went straight to his room, peeling off the suit and taking a quick shower. Then he put on pajama bottoms and fell into bed.
To him, it didn’t matter she had left. All that mattered was that she’d been here for as long as she had. Plus, he had tomorrow morning to look forward to. He smiled as he set his phone alarm, even though he knew he would be hating life in the morning.
Chapter 19
It was almost midnight. Kat’s phone buzzed. Finally—Kat had been trying to get ahold of Steven for the last two hours.
“Hey.”
“Hey.” The center of her gut tightened. “What’s up?” She tried to keep her voice light.
“Nothing. What’s up with you?”
“I’ve just been researching online, and guess what I found?”
“Hmm?” He didn’t sound that interested.
“My grandfather’s ranch. It’s for sale again.” She let out an excited laugh. “Can you believe it?”
“Hmm.”
His lack of enthusiasm disappointed her. “So, where have you been?”
“Out.” He sounded mad.
“Steven?”
“Did you kiss the guy again?” His words were slurred.
Her brow furrowed. “Have you been drinking?” Steven didn’t drink much, so it wasn’t usually an issue between them. He was too worried about how he looked to the professors around him, and he tried to keep his drinking social.
“Maybe.”
“Steven, what’s wrong?”
“Nothing’s wrong with me, but I’m not the one who’s been calling all night.”
He seemed to be sobering up. “You’re being rude.”
He scoffed. “Kat, grow up.”
“Grow up?”
“You … you just have these unrealistic expectations. I might agree with your mother.”
Her heart thundered up into her throat, and she felt like crying, again. He knew bringing up her issues with her mother would rile her up. “Now you’re just being mean.”
“You’ve put me off sexually for a long, long time. I wonder if it’s because of your mommy and daddy issues. Maybe a fear of intimacy altogether.” His voice had turned clinical.
He had hit below the belt. “Go to hell.” A tear slipped down her cheek.
