“Wake up baby. You’re safe.” It was Dice, but he was wrong. She would never be safe again, never.
His arms wrapped around her and he buried his face in her hair. “I remembered something baby. I need you to come with me. I can’t do it without you. I need you for this.”
She looked into his eyes, they were haunted with memories of a past he couldn’t remember, but pain he still felt.
“Sam…”
He nodded. “Believe me, if Lucian wants to talk to us, he will. This could help baby. I really think this can help us.”
She was torn. She wanted to be a good mate, but she couldn’t stand the thought of missing a chance to see Sam. She looked into Dice’s eyes, he was asking her to help him, she knew it wasn’t a task that came easy for a man like him.
She wrapped her arms around his neck and held him close.
“When do you want to go?” She whispered and tried to keep the tears out of her voice.
His hands moved up her back. “As soon as you’re ready. It’s a long ride and I want to get out of here before the sun is up.”
She nodded. “Who is coming with us?”
“Just River and Line. The club has other business. We’ll be safe.”
She nodded and climbed out of bed. He grabbed her hand before she was out of reach. “Thank you, Mallory. I... I don’t think I could do this without you.”
She ran her fingers over his forehead. “I love you Dice. I’ll do anything you need me to.”
He kissed her palm and pressed it against his cheek for several seconds.
“I don’t know what I’ll find Mal, but it will be hell. You need to know that going in. this was hell and I don’t know how I’ll react to it.”
She knew what he wasn’t saying. He was afraid he would lose it. She wasn’t afraid of him and she wouldn’t run from whatever his reaction was. He’d told her she was his mate and while she couldn’t feel the connection the way he did, she loved him with everything she was. Nothing would change that.
She tugged on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. Dice tossed her a pair of boots and a heavy leather jacket with the Howlers colors on the back. On the left breast, there was a patch.
Property of Dice
She lifted a brow in question.
“Means I chose you and anybody that touches you gets killed.” He answered simply. The playful man she had fallen in love with was gone in those moments. In his place was a grimly determined man who knew he was walking into hell and willing to face it.
“Good enough.” She smiled and slid her arms into the jacket.
He pulled her close and kissed her hard. He wasn’t looking forward to what was coming, but they would face it. He would do it for Sam.
11
It took all day and part to get to North Dakota. They pulled off the road at a little motel as the sun sank low. Mallory was exhausted and barely keeping herself from falling over.
“Come on baby, let’s get you inside.” Dice half carried her to their room and tossed her on the bed. “Damn baby, you need to work on your stamina.”
She was laying on her face, but found just enough energy to lift one finger in reply.
She heard Clothesline snort out a laugh as he flopped down on the other bed.
She turned her head to look at him. “Pretty sure I have the money for another one of these fine rooms if you guys are running short.” She grumbled. The place was a dump and that was being kind, but she currently couldn’t care less.
“Not a chance doll face. We all share and one keeps watch. You are still on the top of the hyena’s list. We don’t take chances with mates in this pack.” He waggled his finger at her and she stuck her tongue out.
She was grumpy and tired and wanted a shower. How was she supposed to do anything in the room with three men?
“Come on baby, let’s get you naked.” Dice laughed and started tugging at her boots.
“Not happening. I don’t do the nudist thing.” She squirmed.
Clothesline threw back his head and laughed. “Now I feel hurt. I haven’t seen an ass as fine as yours in a long time.”
A snarl ripped from Dice’s throat, but he shook it off and laughed. “Knock that shit off Line. You know I’m still wound up over it as it is.”
“You are one unstable fucker, you know that Diceman?” He shoved to his feet.
“I’m aware.” Dice sighed.
“I’ll go get something to eat. Should be about half an hour. Get her fucked and scrubbed so we can eat when I get back pretty please.”
Dice ran his hand over the curve of Mallory’s ass. “That shouldn’t be a problem.”
As soon as the door closed behind Clothesline, Dice jerked Mallory’s pants down and lifted her hips.
“I can smell your heat baby. Been wanting you for hours. Feeling your titts against my back all day has me aching.”
Mallory was so tired she could barely move, but he was right, she was turned on and had been. She couldn’t’ seem to help herself. He ran his fingers over her damp lips and hummed his approval.
“Good girl. All wet and ready.” He slid into her in one long stroke that set her aflame with desire. “Fuck.” He hissed when her body tightened around him. He pulled out of her slowly only to slam back in hard.
Mallory moaned loudly and he seemed to lose control. He pounded into her. The bed slammed against the wall and she couldn’t control the moans he forced from her as he slammed into her again and again.
He cursed as he felt her tighten. She was screaming when she came around him and he followed quickly, shooting jet after jet of hot release into her. He stayed inside her and fell with her to the bed.
“You ok baby?” He asked as he smoothed his hand over her skin.
They were both still wearing their boots with their pants shoved down to their ankles. Something about that seemed hilarious to her tired mind. She giggled, then chuckled, and then shook with laughter. He pulled out of her and only made her laugh harder when he turned her, giving her a concerned look. She howled with laughter until tears rolled into her ears. She laughed hysterically until she had no more and then she cried, great howling sobs of pain ripped from inside her like her heart was being torn from her chest.
Dice silently undressed them both and pulled her into the bathroom where he gently washed her. He held her under the warm spray as her tears ran out and she just stood like a zombie and let him finish. He dried her with a towel the size of a postage stamp and pulled one of his shirts over her head.
He didn’t speak until he tucked her into bed. “It will all be alright baby, I promise you that. Trust me. Trust me to take care of this.”
She nodded, but she didn’t believe it. Nothing would ever be alright ever again. Her life had been shattered, everything she had once believed was gone and she knew she would never get that back. She knew Dice needed her to believe in him as much as she wished she really could, and maybe someday she would find the strength, but for now, she would just pretend.
12
Dice tried to concentrate as he walked through the forest, but he was worried about Mallory. She seemed different, almost brittle as they walked along the path, guided only by the foggy memory in Dice’s mind. Something had snapped inside her last night and he felt guilty about it. She had seemed fine, tired, and worried, but fine, now she seemed like she would shatter if the wind blew too hard. What had he done to break her? She had enjoyed their intimacies, but somehow, she’d lost control and then she just seemed empty. Now all he could do was try to remember something that would help Sam. He looked back at her, but she wouldn’t meet his eye.
“Anything seem familiar?” River asked, concerned.
Dice shook his head. He pulled out his phone when it vibrated in his pocket.
“Dice.” He answered without looking at the screen.
“Hello Samuel.”
A growl ripped up Dice’s throat. “Lucian.”
Mallory rushed to him. “Where is Sam? Please. I’ll do anything
, but please give me back my baby.”
Dice switched to speaker so she could hear.
“Young Samuel is doing well. He is responding to treatments. It is promising, but it isn’t enough.” Lucian’s voice sounded bored. “Now then, I see you have recovered memories. That is good.”
Dice gritted his teeth. Why didn’t the bastard just tell him what he needed to know? Why torture him?
“I remember some.” He growled. “Why don’t you just tell me the rest?”
“You don’t deserve the rest. You will understand when you remember. When you remember you will know how to get your son back. Until then, he will enjoy the standard accommodations. You remember those don’t you Samuel? They are the same ones you enjoyed for much of your youth.”
“You son of a bitch. I was a fucking kid! How the fuck am I supposed to remember anything? I was tortured and sick. What the hell do you fucking want from me, you sick son of a bitch? Give me back my kid.”
Mallory shoved him out of the way. “Please. I’ll do anything. Take me too, but please let me see Sam.” She was shaking so hard Dice worried her bones would break. “Please. Just let me hold him. I will do anything you want, but please let me hold him.”
“I will come for you when he is able to withstand a visit.” Lucian said and there was a sharpness to his voice that told Dice he was aggravated. “Right now you wouldn’t help him. If you want to see him, you need to get hold of yourself.”
Mallory was shaking. Her eyes pleaded with Dice, but he couldn’t give her what she wanted and it was killing him.
“Tell me what you have remembered Samuel.”
“Just this place and a phrase, but…”
“What phrase?” His voice was intense, sharp like a needle jammed into the arm.
“Don’t lose hope.” Dice whispered and his head pounded as watery memories swam in his mind.
“But you did lose Hope and you will never see your son again until you have restored her to me. Find Hope! “Lucian shouted.
The line went dead.
Her.
Hope.
Dice fell to his knees in the damp leaves. Her. Hope had been a person, a girl. He remembered green eyes and a mass of dark curls. She looked like him. She was laughing and she threw herself into his arms.
I love you Sam, for always.
Then his vision shifted and he stood in a dank room, like a cave. His mother looked at him with terror filled eyes and pushed him toward a tunnel.
Go. Samuel, you must go. Take Hope and don’t lose her. No matter what happens, don’t lose Hope.
He crawled through the tunnel with the little girl.
I want to go back. I want mama.
Mama.
Dice felt his stomach cramp and he vomited in the dirt. It was too much. It was all too much. What had happened to the girl? What had happened to Hope?
His head pounded and his body ached. He screamed as memories began flooding his mind. He buried his hands in his hair and tugged, but the pain wouldn’t ease. It felt like his head would explode.
“Come on now Dice. Take a deep breath.” River soothed him and Clothesline stepped up to do the same. Mallory sat in the leaves, she looked utterly devastated. It had been a mistake to bring her to these haunted woods. It had been a mistake to drag her along for this, but he needed her. He’d been too weak to do it alone and he had broken her. River had been right. He was not mate material.
His wolf ripped out of him and bolted. Dice didn’t know where he was going and didn’t care. He needed the freedom of the wolf to escape the torment of his memories. He ran until he came to the edge of a cliff overlooking a river. His wolf let out a mournful howl, a song of heartbreak as he lay in the dirt and looked down at the churning water.
He’d lost Hope right here.
But if she was gone, how would he ever get her back?
How could he find a dead girl?
If she was gone, he had failed his mate too. Another mournful sound sang up his throat as his wolf mourned Hope, Sam, and Mallory. He would lose all three and it had begun at this place, all because of Lucian.
He let his wolf linger nearer the edge. Pebbles tumbled into the raging waters below. It would be so easy to let himself drift away, but no.
His mind snapped back to the sound of his mate weeping. He had to do something for her, anything. He had to find Hope and if she wasn’t alive he would find the tiger and force him to save Sam, even if it meant his own life
13
Mallory woke in a bed she didn’t recognize, to a face she did. Nancy sat in a chair by the bed and smiled when she noticed Mallory’s eyes open.
“Hey sis, how you feeling?” Nancy asked and smoothed the hair back from Mallory’s face.
Hope soared for a moment. Could it all have been a dream? Could she have just been sick and having a terrible dream? Was Sam, even now, playing in the next room? Was he safe and well?
The look of sadness in Nancy’s eyes told her no.
“Where’s Sam?” She asked anyway, just to be sure, not willing to let go of that tiny sliver of hope.
“He was taken by a man named Lucian, a doctor. He’s going to make Sam all better.” Nancy cleared her throat, but her eyes were full of tears. “He will be just fine.”
“Where’s Dice?” Mallory asked.
Nancy looked uncomfortable. She turned when a woman walked in holding a tray.
“Club business honey, you know how those things go.” The woman winked at Mallory, but her answer didn’t take away the pain of his absence.
“I don’t know much about club business, but I do know bullshit when I hear it. Where is Dice?” Mallory insisted and she saw a flicker of something in the woman’s eyes.
She knew she’d let him down. She didn’t remember anything after the motel room in North Dakota. She’d had a snap of some kind, but she wasn’t going to wallow in blissful ignorance, if Dice had dumped her off then she wanted to know it straight out. There really was no other reason for her to be in a strange place with Nancy.
“He had some things to do. He will be back as soon as it’s done.” The woman set the tray on the bedside table. “I’m Trish. We are in a safe house until the guys get a few things taken care of. So, you can shove the attitude where the sun doesn’t shine. I’m not real happy about being here either and I won’t have you jumping down my throat all the time so get over it. I’m grateful for what these men are doing for me, maybe you could try some of that.”
“Nice to meet you Trish.” Mallory looked away. She didn’t know what to say and she felt like a fool. Nancy sat beside her. “She’s not lying to you Mal. Things got bad. Thank God Nick was with me. Some psycho came in the shop with a flame thrower. He burned half the town looking for you. Nick barely got me out alive.”
Mallory looked at her friend, her hair was pulled back in a short tail and she wore no makeup. Nancy didn’t go anywhere without makeup, she didn’t even leave her room without a full face. She also had a thick bandage that just peeked out of the neckline of her shirt.
“What happened to you?” Mallory reached for her friend.
“Well...flame thrower in my shop… do the math sweetheart. It isn’t bad and Nick knows a few tricks, but…” She shrugged and looked away.
Mallory knew. The burn would scar. Nancy had always been a flawless beauty and now she would have a burn scar.
“I’m so sorry. All of this is my fault.” Mallory’s hand shook when she reached for Nancy’s. “I don’t know how my life got so screwed up.”
“Well, it all started when we went to this lovely biker bar back in college.” Nancy offered. “Would you change it if you could?”
Mallory was quiet for a few seconds. “I wouldn’t change meeting Dice or having Sam. I still feel like shit though. I never should have dragged you into all this. I’m sorry I couldn’t save Sam…”
“Bullshit.” Trish rolled her eyes and cut her off. “What did you do? You fell in love and had a kid. You got a job and your bos
s was a weirdo. Your son has an illness that no one can cure and he was kidnapped by a man no one alive would be able to stand up to, but you think you should have kept him from taking your kid. Look, my Milli was taken from me and I know for a fact that there was nothing I could have done to stop it. I did what I could. I came to these guys. They got her back. This feeling sorry for yourself shit gets old fast. Your kid is at least safe. Lucian is trying to save him, mine was taken by hyenas. You have no idea what that means, but she will never heal from what they did. Lucian saved her, he took care of her, he talked to her about ways to keep living her life. Millie adores him. He made her feel like she can be safe again, like there is hope.”
Mallory didn’t have words.
“Oh, and it’s totally your fault the crazies attacked your friend. Damn, you do think alot of yourself, don’t you?”
Trish turned and walked out of the room in a huff.
“Well, she makes me sound like a selfish bitch.” Mallory laughed.
Nancy laughed and crawled up on the bed. “What the hell is going on Mal? There are real monsters in the world and somehow, we didn’t even know it. How did we miss it?”
Her friend sounded so scared, so lost. She really was being a selfish bitch. She wasn’t the only one going through something, they all were.
“This world is a crazier place than we thought huh? Mary Beth would love all this.”
Nancy sniffled. “Mary Beth would shit her pants if she knew how right she’d been.”
Mallory laughed. “Oh God. Can you imagine?”
Mary Beth had married a banker and lived in the suburbs. She had three kids that were perfect in every way and she volunteered for all the right causes and wouldn’t speak to Nancy or Mallory if she fell on them.
Dice: Howlers MC Page 6
