by E. L. Todd
Ash sighed then left the bed. His feet were heard on the hardwood floor. “I’ll leave. But I want to talk about this later.”
I sat on the floor with my knees to my chest.
He approached the door and leaned against it. “There’s nothing to be ashamed of. I had a great time. I prefer you drunk.”
“Just go.”
He sighed. “Okay. I’ll see you later.” His feet walked away and then I heard the sound of my front door opening and closing.
Once he was gone, I covered my face with my dress. “Ugh!”
***
I didn’t speak to Ash all week and he didn’t call me. Maybe if I avoided him long enough, everything would just go away. Maybe he would forget everything. And maybe I would stop thinking about it.
I made such an idiot out of myself and now I was totally mortified. I acted like such a slut and totally threw myself at him. I even kissed his erection through his boxers… I was such a skank. And the fact I liked it so much made it even worse.
He must have thought I was pathetic, begging him to sleep with me like that.
All my class went out the window.
I was sitting at home when my phone lit up with a text message.
Hey, sweetheart. I know you’re trying to forget everything that happened but I need you on Saturday for dinner with my parents.
Dammit. Now I had to face the music. Sure.
So, can I pick you up at six?
Yeah. I didn’t want to face him but there was no way around it. I had to escort him tonight. It would sabotage his plan if I didn’t. He couldn’t just replace me with a new girl because that would ruin everything.
I look forward to seeing you.
I threw my phone down and tried not to scream.
***
Ash knocked right on time.
I stared at the door and considered not answering it. How could I face him and not blush crimson red? How could I hold my head high when I was just on my knees last week?
I smoothed out my dress before I opened the door. I quickly turned my back then grabbed my clutch from the kitchen table. Not facing him right away might make this easier.
Ash shut the door behind him. “Hey. Long time no see.”
“Yeah…” I fidgeted with my clutch just so I had something to do.
Ash came behind me and pressed his chest to my back. His arms circled my waist. “Would you stop being a drama queen about this?”
I didn’t turn around.
“I had a lot of fun that night. Hearing you tell me what you want from me was a nice treat.”
“Not helping…”
“Why are you ashamed of that?” He gripped my waist and forced me to turn around and face him. “You think I didn’t want you? You know how much I wish you were sober? It wasn’t easy for me to lie there and do nothing when my dick was rock-hard.”
“Let’s just not talk about this anymore…” I avoided his look.
“No.” He pulled me tight against his chest. “You have nothing to be embarrassed about. I’m the least judgmental person in the world. You really believe I think less of you?”
“I’m just embarrassed that I was so aggressive.”
“Why?” he asked. “It was hot.”
“Yeah?”
“Really hot.” He pressed his forehead to mine. “Don’t be awkward around me. I don’t like it. I miss you.”
“You miss me?”
“Yeah. You’re the only girl friend I’ve ever had. I don’t want to lose you.”
Somehow, he made me melt and forget about my humiliation.
Ash saw the life return to my eyes. “There she is. Now, are we okay?”
I nodded.
“Good. Because that was a stupid thing to be embarrassed about.” He grabbed my clutch from the table and handed it over. “And you look hot tonight, by the way.” Without waiting for my reaction he headed to the door. “Let’s go.”
***
His parents lived in the suburbs in Connecticut. It was a nice little house with a decent backyard. It wasn’t a mansion by any means, but it was definitely comfortable. It would be nice to be away from the city every once in a while.
We sat down to dinner and made small talk. This time, Ash was affectionate with me and I didn’t need to remind him to be. His arm went over the back of my chair and he spoke to his parents like everything was great.
His parents were nice, but I was irritated they were making their son jump through hoops just to get back the money he loaned to them. It was so morally wrong it left a bad taste in my mouth. Ash was a little crazy and over-the-top but he had so many good qualities. Why did they feel the need to change him? I wouldn’t change anything.
His mom clapped her hands excitedly. “Now that dinner is ready…”
“You’re going to get the check book?” Ash blurted.
His mom ignored his comment and returned with a photo album. “It’s picture time.”
“Picture time?” Ash asked. “Why would Alessandra want to see pictures of me?”
“Because I’m your girlfriend,” I reminded him. He could be really dense sometimes.
“So?” he asked. “That still doesn’t make any sense to me.”
“Just shut up and sit there.” His mom sat beside me and flipped through the pages. “And here’s Ash’s story…” The first few pictures of Ash were of him as a baby.
“Ugh,” Ash said. “I was one ugly baby.”
“Were not,” his mom said defensively. “You were beautiful—still are.” She continued flipping the pages to pictures from his little league days. “He was always good at sports.”
“I’m good at everything,” Ash said.
“Can you be quiet for a few minutes?” I asked.
His mom chuckled and kept turning the pages. When we got to his time in high school, his handsome features really came in. He lost all his baby fat and was nothing but hardness. Slight facial hair was on his face. He wasn’t as tall as he is now, but he was still gigantic.
Then she turned the page to his military days. There were pictures of him in his uniform when he was sworn in, and other times when he was visiting. I’d never been a fan of the uniform but Ash looked really hot in it.
“So handsome,” his mom said. “Strong man.”
I leaned toward him and lowered my voice. “You really fill out that uniform…”
That stupid grin stretched across his face. “Maybe I’ll put it on for you when we get back.”
That’d be nice.
His mom finally put the album away. “We have such a handsome boy. We’re very lucky.” She patted his shoulder affectionately.
“Thanks, Mom.” He sipped his wine and kept his arm around me. “Alessandra and I were talking about me going back to school.”
We were?
His mom sat back down again. “Really?” She couldn’t hide the happy surprise in her eyes.
“Alessandra says I’m really good with sketching, so she thinks I should pursue a degree in art history, maybe become a professor or something.”
I couldn’t picture Ash ever doing that.
“That sounds like a great idea,” his dad said. “An admirable goal.”
Why couldn’t they just accept him for exactly who he was?
“You’re really rubbing off on him,” his mom said. “But in a good way.”
“She’s pretty amazing,” Ash said. “I’m lucky she puts up with me.”
Sitting there and lying to his family felt so deceitful. Ash shouldn’t have to pretend to be someone else. It simply wasn’t fair.
“Let’s move into the living room for coffee and dessert,” his mother said.
“Great idea.” His dad rose from the table.
I turned to Ash and gave him an accusatory look.
He knew what it meant. “I just have to get through this. Then I can tell them where to go.”
***
Ash walked me to my door. “Thanks for putting up with my family tonight.”
“They really aren’t that bad. It’s obvious how much they love you.”
“They love me so much that they want to change me?”
“I admit that isn’t fair…but they mean well. At least, they think they do.”
“Whatever.” He leaned against the door panel with his hands in his pockets. “So…you like a man in uniform, huh?”
“Well, you looked really hot in it.”
“I look hot in everything—and nothing.” He gave me that smartass wink.
“You’d be the perfect man if you were a little more humble.”
“I don’t want to be perfect,” he said. “Then I’d never be able to shake the stalkers.”
“There you go again…” I got my keys out of my clutch.
“You didn’t lose them this time?” he teased.
“I wouldn’t want to be stuck with you for the night.”
“Sure…” He wiggled his eyebrows.
I got the door unlocked then walked inside.
Uninvited, Ash entered behind me. “So, what do you want to do?”
“I want you to go home,” I said. “Our date is over.”
He eyed his watch. “It’s not midnight yet. I still get two hours of your time.”
Damn, I forgot. “Want to watch TV?”
“Sure.” He moved to the couch then plopped down. “This is pretty comfy.”
“Thanks.” I sat beside him and grabbed the remote.
“Where’d you get it?”
“Macy’s.”
“I’ll keep that in mind when I decorate my house.”
“What house?” I asked.
“The house in the mountains. You know, the one I told you about.”
“Oh yeah.”
“I think we’re making progress with my parents. They should give me the money soon.”
“What if they want you to get married first?”
“Uh…I sincerely hope not. That’s a little ridiculous.”
“I wouldn’t put it past them.”
“What would we do if that situation came up?”
“I can pose as your wife. I’ve done it before.”
“We don’t have to actually sign a marriage license?”
“Nope.”
“I guess that could work. And after they gave me back my money, we could stop the charade and I could give them the bird.”
“Like you ever would.”
He shrugged. “Even when they’re wrong, I can’t tell them off. It’s weird, you know? At the end of the day, they’re still my parents.”
“I know what you mean.”
“So, what are we watching?” He snatched the remote from my hand and clicked through the channels.
“Hey, why do you get to choose?”
“Because I took the remote.”
I tried to take it back.
He moved it out of my reach. “Too slow, sweetheart.” He put it on the sports channel. “Ooh…the Yankees are playing.”
“This is a rerun.”
“Whatever. It’s either this or some dirty movie.”
“I’d prefer the dirty movie, honestly.”
His head snapped in my direction at lightning speed. “You serious?”
“Well, I’ve already seen this game.”
“If you’re dead serious, I’ll change it. I’ve never watched porn with a chick before.”
“It’s just porn.”
“Alright.” He changed the channel and found a dirty movie. “Ooh…she needs to keep her job but she broke the rules. What will she do?”
I rolled my eyes. “Go out and find another one. That’s what I would do.”
“Shh…don’t ruin the movie. This is great acting.”
“Her tits are so fake.”
“Whatever,” he said. “Real or fake, they feel the same.”
“They do?” I asked with a raised eyebrow.
“Yep.” He turned toward me and winked. Then he turned off the TV.
“What did you turn it off for?”
“You want to keep watching?” he asked with a grin. “Because I’d rather talk to you.”
“Really?”
“Yep.” He put his arm over the back of the couch. “So, you never spend time with your folks?”
“Christmas and stuff…”
“Any reason why you aren’t close?”
“No, not really. We just aren’t. They don’t care about me the way your parents do.”
“They don’t?” he asked in surprise.
“I know that sounds weird but it’s the truth. They just had me and let me do whatever I wanted. Like a puppy or something.”
“That’s lame,” he said. “At least you turned out perfect.”
“Perfect?” I asked with a laugh. “That’s a strong word.”
“It suits you.” He had a serious look on his face. “I don’t hang out with people unless I really like them. Women, in general, talk too much. But I like hearing you talk. You have a nice voice.”
“Thanks…” I felt his gaze and my body tensed. The mood shifted as we stared at each other in the limited light. Only the kitchen light was on, and the rest of the apartment was cloaked in semidarkness.
Ash stared at me without blinking, his thoughts written all over his face.
I swallowed the lump in my throat because I suddenly felt nervous. My hands were cold and clammy, and my thighs burned in longing. I wanted to wrap them around his waist and squeeze.
Ash watched me like he was reading every emotion in my heart. I felt like a canvas on display at an art show. Then he slowly leaned toward me, the intent written clearly in his eyes.
I didn’t move.
I didn’t stop it.
I didn’t want to ruin where it might lead.
His hand moved to the back of my neck slowly, and when he had a good grip on me, he pressed his lips lightly against mine.
The second we touched, I felt the burn. My lips were on fire, as was everything else. He tasted like brownie from the dessert at his parents’ house. He smelled like cologne and body soap. His chest was against my shoulder, and I felt the power and strength underneath.
Instead of just kissing me, he felt my lips. He massaged them slowly, not rushing anything. Every kiss was purposeful. He sucked my bottom lip before he pulled away slowly and looked me in the eye. When he saw the same emotion reflected in my eyes, he brushed his lips across mine in a tantalizing way.
Oh wow.
Then he kissed me again, this time his hand digging into my hair. He gripped it possessively then yanked on it, tilting my face toward his. Then he kissed me harder, his tongue moving into my mouth and dancing with mine. He gave me just the right amount before he pulled away and kissed my lips again. Every action he made was predetermined but spontaneous. When he released a quiet moan into my mouth, along with his hot breath, I knew he really enjoyed it.
Just the way I did.
His lips pulled away from mine as he moved up my jaw and to my neck. Then his mouth found my ear as his hand glided up my thigh. “You. Are. Beautiful.” His arm moved around my waist and he abruptly pulled me down the couch until I was beneath him.
Ash kept his arm around me as he moved his mouth to my chest. He kissed the skin above my top and the hollow of my throat. One hand moved up my thigh but below the bottom of my dress. He squeezed me in a teasing way, making me hotter than I’ve ever been in my life. “If you want me to stop, you better tell me now.”
“Why the hell would I ever want you to stop?” I wasn’t myself all over again. Just like last week, I was drunk. I was in a different place, somewhere I never wanted to return from.
He stopped kissing me for just a moment, giving me that cocky grin I’d come to love, and then his hand moved further up my thigh until he reached my thong. His fingers felt the lace as he moved it over. He pressed his face close to mine and watched the fire in my eyes. I held the gaze because the desire in his was too powerful to look away from.
His fingers grazed
over my entrance, feeling the moisture that leaked just for him. Then he moved his fingers until he found the nub that was aching for him. Gently and in a circular motion, he massaged it.
I immediately gripped his biceps when I felt him. A loud moan escaped my lips, and I felt pathetic letting him see me so easily seduced. It was even more obvious I hadn’t had a good lay in a long time.
His lips found mine and he kissed me slowly. Never once did he take me in an aggressive way like I imagined he would. Every touch was particular. He seemed to be enjoying this so much that he wasn’t in a hurry to reach the final act.
His fingers rubbed me harder, giving me that pressure that made my entire body burn. My legs started to twitch because they didn’t know what to do. Everything felt so good. I wanted to widen my legs even further but the back of the couch was in the way.
“Ash…” I spoke into his mouth and the word came out incoherent. But the meaning was still the same.
He took a deep breath as he kissed me, like the word moved down his spine in a pleasurable way. He continued to rub my clitoris before he inserted two fingers inside me. Even I could feel how wet I was, so it was obvious to him. It was dripping all over his fingers. He released a quiet moan as he felt the moisture on his fingertips. “That pussy is ready for my cock.”
Oh god. I’d never met a man who could talk dirty like that.
He pulled his fingers to his mouth and sucked the juice. Then he returned to kissing me, the taste of my salty sweetness still on his lips.
My hands immediately moved to his shirt and I yanked it over his head. His perfect body was revealed to me, all muscle. My hand moved to his side where a red rose was tattooed on the skin. I knew that was where he’d been shot. It was beautiful in an inexplicable way. My fingers touched it, unable to decipher where the scar was.
I loved kissing his lips but I wanted to kiss other things. I wanted to taste his skin the way he tasted mine. My mouth moved away from his and to his neck. The slight taste of sweat was on his skin. My hands glided down his chest and to the top of his jeans. I unbuttoned them and pulled them down slightly.
Ash kept me close to him as I kissed his chest and neck. His hips rocked against mine slightly, and his hard-on hit me in the right spot. The friction from his definition felt so good against my clitoris. It made my nails dig violently into his skin, harsher than I meant to.
At this point, I was a teapot that started to boil. Steam was erupting, and my patience was evaporating. I’d never been so excited to be with someone, not like this. I didn’t just want to get off and get it over with. I wanted every second of it. Finally, the journey was better than the destination.
