I closed my eyes and tried not to think about what would come next. I tried to think only of Gillacoemgain and the little ones growing inside me. Soon. They would be here soon. And so would Thorfinn and Macbeth. I could only pray that I had enough strength to endure them all.
Forces amassed all around Cawdor as Gillacoemgain’s army prepared to ride north into Orkney and Caithness. Tents popped up in the fields all around the castle as the first snow began to fall. It was a bitter cold morning when a familiar shape rode through the castle gates.
Gillacoemgain and I had been passing through the yard when Tavis arrived.
“Gruoch,” he called, dismounting.
He was road-weary, but a look of relief flashed across his face as soon as he spotted me. My heart felt happy to see him. In truth, Tavis had been in my life for as long as I could remember. He might have been Madelaine’s champion, but he’d always watched over me like a father. In that, he was dear to me.
“Tavis,” I called in reply and we turned to meet him.
He dismounted then kissed me on my cheek in greeting. “Well met. I come with Madelaine’s apologies for the delay. The path is clear. We can ride whenever you’re ready,” he said but then looked at my stomach. “Gruoch…such a trip may be very dangerous,” he said then looked at Gillacoemgain.
The expression on Gillacoemgain’s face startled me. I could read very plainly then that he, too, was worried. If he left me at Cawdor I was not safe. If he sent me to Aberdeen I was not safe. If I rode south I was not safe.
“I’ll be all right,” I told them both. “Kelpie is a sturdy horse. He never shies at anything. I can make the trip.”
“A wagon, maybe?” Tavis asked Gillacoemgain.
I shook my head. “It will attract too much attention.”
Gillacoemgain frowned. “I’ll send Standish and two other of my best men with you.”
“But you need them here.”
“No,” Gillacoemgain said, “I need you safe. There is time.”
I sighed then turned to Tavis. “Please take your rest. Eat, drink, and sleep if you can. I’ll need to get ready,” I told him then waved to one of the lads crossing the square. “Will you escort my guest to the main hall?”
“Yes, My Lady,” the boy said.
I took the reins of Tavis’ horse. “I’ll have him fed.”
Tavis nodded. “Just let me know when you’re ready,” he said then followed the boy inside.
Gillacoemgain patted Tavis’ horse on the neck. “It will be a difficult trip,” he told me then. “I…I don’t know.”
I looped my arm in his, and together, we led Tavis’ horse to the stables. I passed the steed off to the master of horse then wordlessly led Gillacoemgain back to the mews where his falcons waited.
Almost instantly, he smiled then whistled playfully at the birds. They responded by turning an eye toward him, hopping across the mew to get close to him. They were keen to fly, and happy, or so it seemed, to see him.
“You’ll have to teach our sons how to hunt with them, when they’re old enough,” I told him. I wanted Gillacoemgain to have faith in the future. I needed the reassurance as well.
Gillacoemgain smiled at me. “Sons now, is it?” He set his hand on my stomach.
“We’ll soon see.”
Gillacoemgain reached for me, taking my face into his hands. He pulled me into a deep kiss and after, set his forehead against mine.
“Think of the summer. Think of the sunshine. We’ll all be together. All four of us…and your birds and Thora too. We will roam the hills together. Think of your sons’ laughter. Make the dream real, then lock it in your heart. If darkness comes, close your eyes and remember the dream,” I whispered.
“Corbie,” he whispered, setting the lightest kiss on my forehead.
“Gillacoemgain?” a voice called. We turned to see Fergus. He was holding a scroll. “Sorry, My Lord, My Lady. News from King Malcolm.”
Gillacoemgain smiled at me then touched my chin.
“Go ahead,” I told him. “I’ll come in a moment.”
He nodded then turned and joined Fergus.
I waited a few more moments, gazing out at the tents covering the field. I was not surprised when Eochaid arrived. In truth, I’d been waiting for him.
“Lady Gruoch,” he said with a smile. “You’ll be travelling south then?” he asked.
“Yes,” I replied. “And you, you are not planning on marching with the men, are you?”
“No, M’Lady, I’ll stay here and keep watch on M’Lord’s falcons.”
“Good. Eochaid…I don’t know what will happen. If Cawdor gets overrun…make sure you stay safe, stay away. But please know, wherever I am, you are welcomed to join me. You can ride south with me, if you’d like.”
Eochaid cocked his head, and I knew he was listening to the invisible fairy man, but he simply said, “No, M’Lady. But thank you.”
“May the fair ones watch over you,” I said, gently squeezing his shoulder.
“And over you too,” he said, but then he had a confused expression on his face. “I don’t understand, but he, Eitri,” he said, motioning to his shoulder, “told me to tell you to lock the dream in your heart as well. Does that makes sense to you?”
“Yes,” I said, trying to hold back the tears that threatened. Gently, I hugged the boy then turned and left, a heavy feeling of dread sweeping over my heart.
Chapter 22
I headed back to my chamber where I found Ute pacing pensively.
“My Lady? Lord Gillacoemgain told me to prepare your things. We’re riding for Aberdeen?”
“Yes,” I lied, “as King Malcolm commands.”
She nodded. “I’ve packed warm clothes for us and the little ones,” she said. Her voice sounded assured, but she had gone completely pale.
“Very well. Head to the kitchens and ensure we have enough food for us and four men for the journey.”
“Yes, My Lady,” she said then headed out of the chamber.
I opened my trunk and pulled out what few belongings I could not bear the thought of parting with. I set Uald’s gift on the bed, as well as the torcs and amulet I’d brought with me from Ynes Verleath. I gazed down at the violet-colored wedding gown lying in the bottom on the trunk. It would have to stay behind. Sighing, I closed the trunk then dug into my medicines, pulling out anything that might help me in case anything went wrong during the journey. I placed everything into my bag then sat down on the bed. The little ones turned excitedly. How was I ever going to manage the trip?
The door opened behind me. Gillacoemgain entered.
“I spoke to Tavis. I want you on your way today. The men are getting ready. They will be ready when you are.”
I nodded, rose, then pulled some warm clothes from my wardrobe. Slowly, I began getting dressed, Gillacoemgain helping me slide into a woolen tunic. Wordlessly, he bent and helped me lace up my riding boots.
I lifted Uald’s gift, but the belt wouldn’t fit around my waist. The tension was so high, the air so thick and sad between us, that we were startled when we both laughed.
“Here,” Gillacoemgain said, helping me strap the sword around my chest. “It’s harder to pull the blade when it’s on your back but is still at hand if needed. And take this as well,” he said, unbelting the dagger he always wore. I recognized it by the gold pommel decorated with a Pictish flower.
I shook my head. “Oh no. It’s such a precious blade. You should carry it.”
Gillacoemgain took my hand and placed the dagger in my palm. “It bears the symbol of my mother’s line which, much like your own, springs from the royal blood of this land. It was given to my sister by my mother, and before her, by her mother, all the way back to our ancestors from the isle of Scáthach where the women in my family once learned the ancient arts.”
I stared at Gillacoemgain. “Then you do know,” I whispered.
“From the moment I laid eyes on you, walking into Madelaine’s hall like an ancient queen. And
I know, no matter what happens to me, you will survive. And you will care for our children.”
I closed my eyes, wishing for the millionth time that the babes I carried were, in fact, his. Tears streamed down my cheeks.
Gillacoemgain wiped my tears. “None of that, little Corbie,” he whispered. Taking the dagger, he slid it into its scabbard then slipped it into the top of my boot, lacing it inside.
Without another word, we headed downstairs where Ute, Tavis, Standish, and two soldiers waited.
Gillacoemgain nodded to Tavis, and we all headed outside where Kelpie waited, already saddled.
With Tavis’ and Gillacoemgain’s help, I mounted my beloved animal while Thora wove between the horses, excited to go on a new adventure. I hated how useless I felt. My sole concern had to be for my children, but in days past I could fight just as well as any man. I had my own sword, and I knew how to use it. Rather than running, I should have been at Gillacoemgain’s side. Instead of fighting, I was leaving my husband to…I didn’t want to think of what. The vision I’d seen wanted to impose itself on me. I closed the door to it, not wanting to remember.
I pulled the heavy cloak I wore around me tightly as I settled onto Kelpie. It was going to be a long, uncomfortable ride. As long as Kelpie stayed sure-footed and we avoided trouble, everything would be fine.
Gillacoemgain helped Ute onto her horse, settling her in, then spoke in low tones with Standish. After, he returned to me.
“Gillacoe—” I began, reaching out to touch his face.
“No good-byes,” he said, taking my hand, kissing my fingers. “Ride safe, and I’ll join you and my little ones very soon.” But even as he said it, I knew we both felt the dark shadow that hung over us.
I closed my eyes. I wanted to be with him in that moment, but the raven showed me pictures. I saw Gillacoemgain in the middle of a roundhouse. Once more, I felt the heat from flames licking the walls and saw fire and ash breaking through the ceiling.
I gasped.
“Corbie?” All will burn. Make your heart ready, Cerridwen.
Shaking, I opened my eyes and looked at him. “Beware…beware the flames…beware of roundhouses.”
“Roundhouses?”
“I saw…flames. A meeting place…there was fire all around you.”
Gillacoemgain studied me closely, his forehead furrowing. “Don’t think of it. Try to think of a name for our little ones.”
I smiled weakly. “You’ll let me choose?” I asked as cheerfully as I could, still frozen by the image of fire that had danced across my mind.
“If we have a daughter, name her Crearwy, for my sister?”
Tears threatened. I swallowed hard. “Of course.”
He reached out to stroke my cheek one last time then let me go. “I love you, Corbie,” he told me in a low voice so the others could not hear.
“I love you too,” I whispered. “May the Morrigu ride at your side.”
“And at yours,” he said then stepped back, motioning to Standish that we were ready.
Taking the reins, I turned Kelpie and followed the other riders across the ward to the gate. I looked back just once more.
Gillacoemgain raised his hand in farewell.
I gazed at him long and hard, trying to engrain his image into my mind, hoping it was not true, but still knowing I would never see Gillacoemgain of Moray again.
Chapter 23
We started our slow trek south. Kelpie seemed to know he had an important task and rode as gently as if he were a lady’s palfrey, not the charger Boite had bought as a gift for his daughter. We rode late into the night, stopping in a thick glen. The canopy of trees overhead kept out the light snow that fell.
“How are you, Lady?” Standish asked me as he helped me dismount.
My heart had been struck numb the moment I rode from Cawdor. I felt like everything inside me was frozen. I felt nothing. My body, however, told a different tale. I was exhausted. When I slid off Kelpie, all I wanted was to close my eyes and rest. “Just a bit tired,” I said.
Tavis had already gotten to work laying a bear skin on the ground at the base of a wide old oak tree.
“Will you rest?” he asked.
I stretched my back. It ached terribly. I nodded.
“Here, My Lady,” Ute said as she and Tavis gently lowered me to the ground.
Tavis set about lighting a fire while Ute dug through her things and handed me a sweet cake.
“Will you eat, My Lady?”
I shook my head. “I’ll sleep a bit,” I told her, then tried to settle in. Soon, the fire was crackling. Thora came and lay down beside me, setting her head on my leg.
Tavis sat beside me as Gillacoemgain’s men rested. “How many nights I camped by that stream, waiting for Madelaine to return. That old bear kept me warm more times than I can count,” he said as he warmed his hands by the fire.
“You’ve always been so good to us,” I whispered, feeling my eyes drift closed.
“She is the love of my life,” he told me. “I would do anything for her…or those she loves.”
I reached out and patted Tavis on the arm. I didn’t want to hear more. His words made the ice around my heart crack. I didn’t want to feel.
My eyes closed, and I slept.
That night, I dreamed of Gillacoemgain. We were standing in the sunny field, his falcons flying overhead. He was laughing as he carried a dark-haired girl on his shoulders. I looked down to see the same child I’d had a vision of once before was holding my hand.
I smiled at him, leaning down to kiss him on his brow.
“What is it, Mother?” he asked.
I shook my head. “Nothing.”
“What’s that?” the little girl called.
I turned to look at a strange orange light rolling across the horizon. Slowly, Gillacoemgain lowered the girl off his shoulders and handed her to me. He pulled his sword and stepped in front of us just as a wave of fire crashed across the field, burning everything in its path.
“Get back,” he told me.
I took the little ones then turned and ran from the flames. I stopped just a moment to look back, long enough to see my husband stand before the fire, sword drawn. And like a wave, the flames washed over him.
Gasping, I woke with a start.
Ute and Thora both slept soundly beside me.
“Are you all right, My Lady?” one of the soldiers asked. I realized he’d been standing guard.
“Just a dream,” I said, trying to shake the horrible image.
He nodded. “Almost morning. Time to get going anyway.”
He roused the others. In near silence, we ate a meager breakfast then departed once more. Kelpie carried me safely through the forest and across the fields, and at the end of the second day, we rode into the familiar valley of Madelaine’s keep.
“Welcome home,” Tavis told me.
My back ached. Cold and hungry as I was, never had such a hated place been a more welcomed sight.
We rode into the yard and there we dismounted. At once, Thora disappeared into the main hall. There was a flurry of excitement as servants rushed to meet us. Tavis instructed them to provision the Moray men for the return home.
“Thank the Mother Goddess you’ve arrived,” Madeline said, rushing across the yard to greet us as she pulled a cloth around her. As soon as she caught sight of Tavis, Madelaine sighed in relief. She pulled me into the embrace. “Oh, my dear sweet thing, how are you?”
“As well as can be expected.”
“Come,” Madelaine said, interrupting my thoughts. “You must be weary. Corbie…you’re huge!”
“Twins,” I whispered to her under my breath.
“These are dangerous hours,” she said, a worried expression crossing her pretty features. “We need to get you to Epona. Fife left for Edinburgh yesterday. He didn’t want to be here when you arrived. The more he didn’t know, the better. We can leave for the coven first thing in the morning.”
I nodded, and we all headed
into the great hall. The servants moved about busily gathering supplies and no sooner had we arrived than Standish came to take my leave.
“Won’t you stay the night?” I asked. “It’s bitter cold.”
“No, My Lady. We need to get back to his lordship.”
I nodded. The desperation of the situation was painfully apparent. Moray would be won or lost in this battle. Gillacoemgain needed every man he had. And even that would not be enough. I had to try to do something. After all, if he died…no, I would not think of it.
“May the Great Mother see you safely returned,” I told him.
“And you safely delivered,” he replied with a smile. “Be safe, Lady Gruoch,” he said, a serious expression on his face.
“Thank you. And you.”
He nodded.
With that, the Moray men headed out of the castle and back to Gillacoemgain.
“What can I get for you?” Madelaine asked me as she rubbed my back and shoulders. “Do you want a bath? Something to eat?”
“All I want is sleep.”
“I have a room prepared for you,” she replied, motioning to a serving girl.
“You’ll see to Ute and Thora?”
Madelaine nodded, lent me her arm, then we headed upstairs. I exhaled deeply. It felt good to be back in Madelaine’s care.
Upstairs, I entered a chamber already warmed by a cheery fire. Madelaine helped me re-dress then lowered me into bed, covering me.
“No fever,” she said, checking my forehead.
“No, I’m only tired.”
“Sleep, little raven,” she whispered, gently kissing my forehead. A moment later, I heard the chamber door close behind her.
I closed my eyes. My thoughts sprang at once to Gillacoemgain.
“Dark lady, protect him,” I whispered as I fell asleep.
Just as I drifted off, I heard a reply come in a whisper. No.
Highland Blood (The Celtic Blood Series Book 2) Page 12
