As they filed out, Garras hesitated at the door, waiting for Vanna. Kusac saw this and sent mentally to her.
Vanna, go with him. Don't despise him because of what he is. Just remember how gentle he is with you, and how his skills have kept us both alive.
She made no answer and he saw Garras turn to leave on his own.
You knew what he was months ago, Vanna! Why punish him for his past? This isn't worthy of you. He knows you're lying to yourself, remember that! At least talk to him about it, you owe him that.
She got to her feet. "Garras, wait. We need to talk," she said.
Kaid waited till they'd gone. "So we play the Brotherhood at its own game, eh?" he grinned.
"It seems the best way," said Kusac. "It also enables us to get your people legitimately employed with us without them having to leave the Brotherhood. Naturally, we'll have this agreement down in writing so neither Ghezu nor Lijou can demand them back at a later date."
"That would be wise," agreed Kaid. "About the new clan, I presume you've checked out the legalities."
Kusac nodded. "If we prove we've walked the Fire Margins, we can set up a new clan. Then our Brotherhood members can leave and join us legitimately."
"Where do you plan to locate this clan?"
"This land is my mother's, the Aldatan land. South of here, adjoining it, is the Valsgarth estate, my settlement as heir. There's already a villa there that's being made ready for us at the moment, and the remains of the estate houses. As soon as Carrie is fit to move, I had planned to take her there to recuperate. It's time we had our own home, and our own lives," he said, getting to his feet. "We could locate the new clan there. Where is Carrie, by the way? I don't want to wake her by sending."
"In the main lounge, sleeping on the daybed," said Kaid.
"I want to call in on her before I find my father. I need to know why he wanted the kitlings brought here."
"Your father also requested a bodyguard this morning when he visited the Guild. I sent T'Chebbi with him. She said the attitude of the medical staff toward him bordered on the aggressive. She was glad she was there."
"That's bad," said Kusac.
"Esken wasn't much better," Kaid said, accompanying him to the inner balcony. "He was patronizing and insulting— just within the bounds of the acceptable, until he refused to accept the Governor's appointment without checking with him first. Your father insisted on calling Nesul, who proceeded to give Esken an earful! T'Chebbi also said your father probably had us collect the kitlings because Esken said he was moving them the next day."
"Gods, where are we headed if this continues?"
"I think Esken's rattled because he now realizes your family poses a threat to his control of the Council. With your father working with the new Leskas, it leaves him little or no room to conduct illicit experiments on them to find out their potential. He's going to have to move them if he wants to stay in control."
"I wonder if Esken realizes that in crossing swords with my father he's taking on a major government department, not just one male."
"If he doesn't, he'll soon find out," said Kaid as they made their way down the main staircase.
* * *
Vanna joined Garras in the corridor. "We'll talk in our rooms," she said, turning to go upstairs.
Garras followed her. He could tell she was still deeply upset about his past. He sighed. He'd been too long in the world outside Stronghold. He'd never bothered about anyone's reaction to his profession in those days— especially a female's, but then the females who were interested in the Brothers weren't like Vanna. And he'd rather have her than any number of those from his past.
Once in the privacy of their lounge, Vanna turned to him.
"Before you begin, Vanna," he said, forestalling her, "please sit down and listen to what I have to say."
She opened her mouth in protest, then closed it and sat down on the settee, looking up at him.
"You didn't know me during my days in the Brotherhood," he said, sitting opposite her. "I joined, as we all do, because Vartra called me. I trained hard and became one of the best at what I did. Kaid and I teamed up early on. As Brothers all we have is the God, our oath, and each other. Lasting friendships outside Stronghold are frowned on, and are virtually impossible anyway."
He stopped for a moment, trying to gauge the effect of his words on her, but he couldn't. "What we did had to be done, Vanna. If we hadn't done it, someone else would. It's not an excuse, it's a fact. We were thorough, making sure our targets were beyond our help before we took the decision to terminate them. Others weren't so particular. When we killed, our kills were quick and painless. I've only known one that wasn't, and that was when Kaid killed Chyad. Nothing will make me ashamed either of what I was or what I did in those days, Vanna. It's part of who and what I am." He fell silent, hoping she could understand.
She looked away from him and down at her clasped hands. The silence lengthened until he got to his feet. He felt numb inside and was grateful for it just now. Later the loss of her would hit him.
"Where are you going?" she asked sharply.
"I'm leaving," he said. "If what I was is more important than me, then obviously there's no point in my staying."
"I didn't say that."
"You don't need to, Vanna. I know when I'm not wanted." He turned toward the door but before he reached it, she got to her feet and grabbed hold of him.
"Don't go!" she said. "Don't leave me alone, Garras. I need you!" The previously unshed tears were now rolling silently down her face. Her hands reached out to clutch him, relaxing only when he wrapped his arms round her.
"Don't frighten me like that again, Vanna," he said, his voice muffled against her face as he held her close, letting her scent and the warmth of her body against his push back the fear of losing her. "I can't undo my past, it's made me what I am today. I've waited too long to find you."
"I know," she said. "So have I, Garras. You're what matters to me, nothing else. It was just such a shock ..."
"Enough," he said, nuzzling her ear. "We're still together."
CHAPTER 3
Kaid was off duty for a few hours. Returning to his room, he lay down on his bed hoping to catch up on some rest but he found his mind too active to allow him to sleep. Fragments of the God-Vision which had begun all this kept flitting through his thoughts. It had started when he'd heard the voice of Vartra telling him there was a pair in space, a Leska pair, who carried within them the key to the future.
Trying to recapture more of his vision, he let his mind roam back to that night. When the flashback came, it came suddenly and with as much force as the original vision.
He saw two figures— mere shadows within the temple— flames encompassing them as they tried to reach safety. Flying debris filled the air as the roof began to collapse. People were running everywhere, desperate to escape. The dancing flames picked out the two crouching figures, highlighting them briefly, then the images were gone, leaving him as shaken as when he'd experienced it the first time. Now, however, he knew without a doubt that the smaller figure had been the Human, Carrie.
What little the Brotherhood knew of the Cataclysm told them that it had been a time of fire— even the sky had been blazing according to their records: the records that were composed of the dreams and visions of former members from ancient times. Hardly a reliable source, but it was all they had. These records went on to say that after the firestorms, the earthquakes had come. Tidal waves from the coast had swept across the land, resculpturing it into new shapes. The thick, black clouds encircling their world had then released their burden of water onto the land below, destroying what little had remained of their civilization.
The dangers involved in the Fire Margins ritual were far greater than he'd thought possible if what he'd seen was true. Would Carrie and Kusac be subject to the dangers of the world he'd glimpsed? Could the Cataclysm destroy them as easily as it had destroyed so many Sholans over a thousand years ago? Was that why hardly
anyone had survived the ritual?
What he'd read about it emphasized the fact that every-one who'd reached Vartra by walking the Fire Margins had died, their minds trapped somewhere in the far past while their bodies suffered the same fate at Stronghold or Vartra's Retreat.
It wasn't until now that he'd begun to realize what that part of the vision meant. Yes, he'd seen Kusac and Carrie traveling the Margins, but Vanna was right, he hadn't seen them return. He'd been the one advocating taking that path, the one telling them it was the only answer, and now he was doubting the wisdom of his own advice. Was Vartra calling them only to destroy them? He'd wondered that before the Challenge and somehow they'd managed to survive. Everything was leading them toward the God: if it was meant to be, then nothing he did would matter one way or the other. They would go, and Vartra would decide whether they returned.
He turned over, exhausted by the strength of the memories, hoping sleep would claim him, hoping it might bring another vision, this time a happier one.
* * *
It was mid-afternoon by the time Konis returned home. His mood was thoughtful. As they approached the perimeter of the estate, he was surprised out of his reverie when T'Chebbi was challenged over the comm for their identity. He waited while she reeled off an arcane code and they were given permission to enter.
"What was all that about?" he asked her.
"Ni'Zulhu, the new head of security," she replied. "We've been allocated passwords to use whenever we approach the estate."
"Isn't that a little excessive?"
T'Chebbi turned her head briefly in his direction. "We're taught at Stronghold that the only effective security is total security."
Konis grunted. Rhyasha was going to be none too pleased. He'd have to have a word with Kaid. This level of security could bankrupt the estate very quickly.
* * *
Rhyasha was in her office and her mental greeting was very welcome as he made his way there to join her.
"How's Carrie?" he asked, sitting down beside her. "I sensed Kusac's concern the moment I arrived."
Rhyasha handed him a mug of c'shar and settled back in her chair. "We could hardly get her to eat anything today," she admitted. "All she wants to do is sleep. If she's the same tomorrow, then I'll be concerned. Vanna says it's to be expected after all that she's been through. She's taken the precaution of contacting Dr. Reynolds on Keiss and is waiting for him to get back to her."
She stopped, unconsciously tapping her claw tips on the arm of her chair.
"For the moment it's Kusac I'm concerned about. The last few months have matured him mentally, but emotionally and physically, he's still a young male whose hormones are not yet stable. He's in control of his feelings, but only just."
"Is he suffering any of Carrie's tiredness?"
"None. The opposite in fact. He's unable to relax at all. The loss of their cub has hit him as hard as it hit her. Then there's the demands of their Link. Thank the Gods that Carrie is free of them for the moment, but he isn't."
"It looks as if this Link of theirs has stripped away most of his training," said Konis thoughtfully. "We're going to have to assume this will happen to all our people who have a Human Leska. A new system has to be devised, one that doesn't rely on the assumption that our males will remain in control of themselves and their talents."
"Kusac will be able to help you on that, once he's got over their loss. Meanwhile, he needs something less demanding to absorb his interest and tire him out. Bringing those kitlings home was inspired," Rhyasha said, leaning forward to touch her mate's hand. "Just what he needs. He can help them settle in, start teaching them. He'll be able to find out if their Link is anomalous in any other way. Kitra can help him."
"Interesting use of the word help," he said. "Kitra's not much older than those two. I have to admit I didn't bring them home for Kusac's benefit. I brought them home because Esken was doing exactly what you predicted he would do. He was treating them as impersonally as jeggets in a maze. Do you know the young male's mother hasn't been allowed to see him for nearly a week? And on their Link days, the medics were intruding on them, demanding that they complete barrages of tests! It can't be allowed, Rhyasha, that's why I brought them here. He hasn't even started training them yet!"
"I assume Esken didn't agree to your moving them," she said, her mouth opening in a faint smile. "Did you inform Ni'Zulhu that he could expect Esken or his people to arrive at any time to retrieve them?"
"Ni'Zulhu? Ah, our security controller," said Konis, with an embarrassed flick of his ears.
"That was another little addition to the family you didn't tell me about," she said gently.
Konis' ears flicked again. "There wasn't time, Rhyasha. It wasn't even a rational decision ..."
"Konis, it's all right. I have no objections. I would have preferred to have known before he arrived, that's all. Have you any more surprises for me?"
Konis shifted uncomfortably in his seat and looked away from his wife's amber gaze. "I know that I should have consulted you as Clan Leader first, and for that I do apologize. I've also asked Kaid for bodyguards for all of us."
"Another intuitive decision?" she asked, raising an eye ridge.
This time Konis could hear a touch of ice in her voice. Never before had he gone over her head in matters concerning her Clan.
He looked up, meeting her gaze this time. "Yes," he said. "I asked T'Chebbi to accompany me this morning and frankly, I'm glad I did. Without her, I wouldn't have been able to see Jinoe and Rrai, and I'd have had to put up with Esken's insulting attitude regarding my appointment as head of the Mixed Leska Project."
His wife's face softened but retained a worried look.
"Are we actually in conflict with Esken now?"
"Oh, assuredly. He'll not forget that I've humiliated him in front of a Brother and Governor Nesul, or that I've taken the kitlings from him."
"That shouldn't be enough to put us at risk from him. What could he do to us? Surely he wouldn't approach the Brotherhood, would he? I can't remember when the last political assassination happened. It has to be over fifty years ago."
Konis leaned forward and put his hand over Rhyasha's. "Of course he wouldn't! Apart from anything else, all our security people here are Brothers. I'm probably being utterly paranoid, but ..."
"Better that than we're found wanting if we need it," she murmured. "How do we deal with Esken now?"
Konis sighed and sat back in his chair. "I'm working on it," he said. "For the moment, I'll get what I can in the way of files and other data from him. Hopefully Vanna managed to download the kitlings' files before Esken was alerted to their disappearance. I think we're going to have to stop any mixed Leska pairs living in the Guild for their own safety. All Esken needs to do is spirit them off to another guildhouse, then say they're in quarantine or some such thing. I'm afraid I have to say that I can no longer trust our Guild Master."
"Our Human bond-daughter has brought about a greater change in our culture than either of us anticipated," said Rhyasha.
"Maybe, and maybe all this has been sitting under the surface of our lives waiting for her arrival," he sighed. "I must inform Governor Nesul that I have the kitlings."
* * *
Though he wanted to join Carrie, Kusac knew he had to speak to his father first. He had to be told what was happening to the ruined cities and about the presence of Valtegan remains dating back to the time of the Cataclysm.
Discovering that Konis was busy talking to his mother, he went in search of Carrie but was waylaid by Kitra and the kitlings. When he finally managed to leave them, he headed straight downstairs to the lounge.
Carrie was asleep on the settee. Kaid was sitting in the garden just outside the open doorway, keeping an eye on her and the immediate grounds. He looked up, flicking an ear in greeting as Kusac entered.
Going over to her, Kusac tucked the blanket more securely around her before perching on the edge of the seat. Leaning forward, he touched her forehead
with his fingertips. It felt cooler than usual, and she was still so pale! She didn't stir.
Getting up, he went to sit on the step with Kaid. "Did she eat much?" he asked.
Kaid took the stim-twig out of his mouth. "Only a few mouthfuls," he said.
"I'm worried about her, despite what Vanna and my mother say."
Kaid chewed on his twig for a minute or two before answering. "Are you picking up any symptoms from her? Is her state of health affecting you at all?"
"No, and that's part of what's worrying me," said Kusac, pulling at the grass. "It's as if she's barely there, Kaid."
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