by Carl Weber
“You coming?” he shouted up at me again.
“Yeah, but you have to catch me.” He opened his arms and I leaped. He caught me, and our lips met as he lowered me to the ground. Within seconds his hands were easing their way down my back to massage my ass, and his passionate kisses were making my knees weak. At that point, my monthly visitor was the only thing keeping me from climbing back up on that lifeguard chair and getting busy right there under the stars.
“Let’s get out of here,” he whispered between kisses.
“Aw’ight, but there’s something I need to tell you before we go,” I whispered back.
“What’s that?” he asked, kissing my neck. I could feel his hard penis rub up against me and that just made matters worse. I wanted him more than I ever wanted any man before in my life.
“I hope this doesn’t mess up your plans, but, but I’m…I’m on my period. I can’t do anything tonight. I mean I want to, but—”
“What?” His neck snapped back and he immediately stopped caressing my ass and dropped his hands to his sides. It was obvious that he was disappointed and that I had done exactly what I said I wouldn’t do. I had opened my big mouth and ruined our date. I wanted to smack myself. Why the hell did I have to tell him that? I could have come up with some excuse about my period just starting when we got to his place. But now I was in trouble, ’cause if what I knew about men was true, he was about to make an excuse to take me home, and that was the last thing I wanted him to do.
“Please don’t be mad, Dante. I can still take care of you if you want.”
He had this bewildered look on his face and a twinge of confusion in his voice. “Take care of me? Take care of me how?”
“You know. Take care of you?” I raised my eyebrows a couple of times then smiled bashfully as I twisted nervously in front of him. Can you believe he still didn’t get the hint? I stepped closer to him and placed my hand on his waist as I stared into his eyes. “What I’m trying to say is that even though I’m on my period, this date doesn’t have to end. I like you, Dante, and I’m willing to do whatever it takes to make you happy.” I gave him a wicked smile. “And believe me. I know how to make a man happy.”
He took another step back, tilting his head as he studied my face. “Are you saying what I think you’re saying?”
Thank God he was finally starting to get the hint, but both his expression and his words told me he wanted it confirmed. Why, I don’t know. What did he want me to do, spell it out for him? Did he actually want me to just come out and say that I would suck his dick? What the hell was this, some type of test? I glanced at him and he still had this look of uncertainty on his face. I knew it was a front, but I finally said to myself, What the fuck. If he wants me to say it, then I’ll say it. I ain’t got no shame to my game.
“Look, Dante, I’m not stupid and neither are you. I know you spent a lot of money tonight trying to impress me so you could get some ass. Well, I’m impressed, and although I’m on my period, I’m going to give you the best blow job you’ve ever had. I know it’s not the same as getting some, but I’m pretty good at it. Shit, I’m better than good,” I bragged with a smile. “I’m da bomb.”
There. I’d said it, but instead of him smiling or looking happy or even grateful, he just shook his head and tried to hide a smirk. I’m not gonna front; that shit pissed me off. I mean damn, I did just offer to suck his dick, and now he was looking at me like I was a ho. I was no longer feeling like a pretty woman.
“What the fuck is so funny?” I snapped.
He stopped smirking and stepped closer. He even tried to grasp my hand, but I pulled it away. “Tanisha, I wasn’t planning on having sex with you tonight. Look, this is only our first date. I respect you too much for that.”
“You respect me too much?” I just stared at him, thinking, This motherfucker is gay. Don’t no straight man say no to me. “You expect me to believe that you spent all this money and you wasn’t planning on getting some ’cause you respect me too much?”
“Yeah, it’s the truth. I was planning on taking you to Coney Island to see the fireworks, not to a hotel.” I was starting to feel sick.
“So you had no intentions of getting any tonight?” I wanted to call him a liar, but the last time I did that, he proved me wrong.
“None,” he said in this sincere voice that made my stomach turn. “I didn’t think sex was something we’d get into until at least a couple of weeks down the road.”
“And you don’t want me to go down on you?” I was starting to feel like I was shrinking in front of him.
He hesitated for a second to think, which told me he wasn’t gay, but I still didn’t like his answer. “Nah, it’s too soon.”
Can you say fool? That’s how I felt: like the biggest fool in the world. His facial expression was so serious I had no choice but to believe him. I swear if I had a gun, I would have shot myself for being so damn stupid. I’d never been so embarrassed in my entire life. How in the world could I be with him after this? God, why the fuck did I just tell him I would suck his dick? He must have thought I was a straight-up ho, and the way I was feeling, I couldn’t blame him.
I was so embarrassed I couldn’t look at him. I didn’t think I could ever look at him again, so I just said, “Dante, can you please take me home?”
“Take you home for what?”
“Because I wanna go home,” I snapped with attitude. At that moment all I wanted to do was get home and as far away from him as possible.
“Come on, Tanisha. Don’t be like this.” He tried to kiss me and I pushed him away.
“Look, I said I wanna go home, aw’ight?” I turned and started walking toward the car.
“What about the fireworks?”
“Like I give a shit about some damn fireworks now.”
11
Dante
I pulled my truck in front of Tanisha’s building and turned to her, hoping I’d find the words to make things right. She’d barely said a word during the ride home and in truth I was afraid things between us were over before they had begun. All this because I didn’t have the common sense to smile and say yes when she offered to go down on me. Things were going so perfectly. If I had just stopped trying to impress her by being Mr. Respectful, I’d probably be on the beach at Coney Island watching the fireworks, having who knows what done to me. Damn, of all the times in my life to let my big head take control from my little one.
“Bye,” Tanisha said, emotionless as she leaned over and kissed my cheek, a telltale sign that things between us were truly over.
“Call you tomorrow?” I tried to make it sound like a casual question, but it was actually a plea to give us one more try; a plea that I knew was painfully rejected when she glanced at me coldly and stepped out of the car. I called her name, but she closed the door like she hadn’t heard a word I said. I knew that she had, and as much as I liked her, I was starting to get sick of her childish behavior.
I was about to pull off, but my heart and conscience just wouldn’t let me. There was something about her that captivated me, and it wasn’t just her body. Childish behavior or not, she intrigued me like no other woman I’d ever met, including Anita. I knew if I drove away now, I would probably never see her again, and that just wasn’t something I was willing to take a chance on. I opened my car door and called out to her again. This time she stopped, turning only her head toward me.
“What you want?” she huffed, sounding like I was grinding on her last nerve.
“I don’t know why you’re acting this way,” I said boldly. “If you were any other woman, I would have let you go down on me!”
She whipped the rest of her body around, pointing her right index finger at me and placing her left hand on her hip. That’s when I realized what I was trying to say hadn’t come out the way I had wanted it to.
“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”
“It was supposed to be a compliment,” I answered, swallowing hard.
“It wa
s?” She gave me a doubtful look as she raised her eyebrows. “Well, then let me apologize,” she continued sarcastically, “ ’cause I feel a lot better now knowing that you don’t even think I’m good enough to suck your dick.”
Oh, Lord, now she’s blowing things all out of proportion. Damn, what is it about this girl? Can’t she tell when a guy really likes her?
“I didn’t mean it that way, Tanisha—”
She cut me off before I could explain. “Oh, yeah? What the fuck did you mean?”
When I didn’t answer fast enough, she shook her head and turned toward her building. I stepped out of the car and sprinted toward her, trying to get my thoughts together so I could convey exactly what I really did mean into words. When I caught up to her, I stepped in front of her, hoping to give the respectful answer she deserved.
“Look, I don’t know how this happened, and I admit at first I was just looking to have a good time, but after you showed up at the church the other night and we had a chance to talk, this stopped being a wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am thing for me. Like I said before, I like you, and for the first time in a long time I’m looking long-term. I don’t want this to be about sex. I want this to be about us. So before we get intimate, I wanted to get to know you better. Is there something wrong with that? I thought that’s what you women want.”
She stared at me blankly, and for a second there I thought I saw a glimmer of hope, but slowly a smirk crept onto her face and she started clapping her hands. “Bravo! Bravo! You know, I really didn’t think you had it in you. You really know how to run game, don’t you? That was one hell of a performance,” she told me, “but now that I’ve seen the show, there’s no need for me to stay. Now can you get out my way so I can go upstairs?” She tried to push her way past me.
“Performance? You think I was acting?” I let out a frustrated laugh.
“Now I see why you’re by yourself. That sounded like some corny-ass shit I read in a romance novel. I’m looking for a man, Dante, someone who’s gonna keep it real like I do. Not some fake-ass Goody Two-shoes.”
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. Here I was pouring my heart out to this woman and she thought it was a corny act. Well, I was about to act all right. I was about to act the fuck up!
“You know what, Tanisha?”
“What?” She smirked again. She was daring me to match her funky attitude, and I was about to take that dare. I didn’t like to act this way, but I could when I was being pushed, and she was pushing me to that point.
I put my middle finger in her face. “Fuck you!”
“Fuck me?” She snapped her head back in disbelief like she wasn’t sure the words had come out of my mouth.
“That’s right. Fuck you! I pour my heart out to you, tell you how I feel and how much I respect you and that I don’t wanna use you for your body, and then you treat me like this. You know what? I should’ve let you suck my dick, ’cause if you ain’t got no respect for yourself, then why the fuck should I?”
“What you trying to say? You think I’m a ho or something?” All of a sudden she was on the defensive.
“Nope, I think you’re a beautiful black sister with a fucked-up attitude who can’t see a good thing when he’s standing in front of you.”
“You ain’t all that.” She showed me that damn smirk again.
I turned my head away from her then snapped it back, looking her dead in the eyes. She jumped a step back. I’ll tell you this much—it was obvious she suddenly had more respect for me. My sister had always told me that women hate soft men, so from this point on, that Mr. Respectful shit was out the door.
“No, you’re right. I’m not all that. But as far as me keeping it real, I was keeping it real. I’m a nice fucking guy, but baby, I ain’t nobody to play with, especially when it come to my feelings.” I stepped out of her way and started walking to my car. “I was really feeling you, Tanisha. We really could have had something special. It’s too bad you couldn’t see that.”
12
Donna
It was Friday afternoon, and like most Fridays, I was looking forward to Saturday afternoon when I would hook up with Terrance. Things between us had been good this past week. Not only had we gone out to lunch twice, but we’d found some way to get in a quickie almost every day. Terrance kept to his word too. He hadn’t brought up the anal sex thing once, though I have to admit it had been heavy on my mind. I was starting to feel guilty for not giving in to him. After all, he had tried to fulfill almost all of my fantasies, even if they were pretty tame compared to his. That’s why I went to Brooklyn to see my best friend, RaShanda Wright. I was hoping she might have some answers to put an end to my sleepless nights.
When I knocked on RaShanda’s door, I realized I hadn’t visited her since a month before Terrance and I started dating. RaShanda and I were like Shorty and Dante—we’d known each other since elementary school. RaShanda’s mom was one of my mother’s best friends and one of the more powerful deaconesses in the church. RaShanda, on the other hand, was everything a church girl was not supposed to be. You know the type: scandalous, wild, and crazy. To be blunt, RaShanda was a slut, a straight-up freak, and everyone but her momma knew it until she got pregnant. That’s when her mother kicked her out of the house in an attempt to hide the pregnancy from the people in the church.
Secretly, I believe every woman has a friend like RaShanda. I knew we were an unlikely pair, what with me just losing my virginity at the ripe old age of twenty, but RaShanda was still my best friend. She had been there for me through thick and thin, and I tried to be there for her even after she moved to Brooklyn from her mother’s home. I think the reason I didn’t judge her was because she had also provided me the opportunity to live vicariously through her freaky life. You see, RaShanda had participated in all the things I would have liked to try when we were kids but was too afraid to try.
“Who?”
“It’s Donna, girl. Open the door.”
RaShanda flung open the door, looking as divalicious as ever. She had the statuesque presence of an Amazon. As the men like to say, she was built like a brick house. It was late morning and she had on stilettos with a matching silk blouse and capri pants, both in the brightest shade of purple. She wore darkened designer shades although she was in the house. I could see she’d already had her weekly manicure and pedicure. Lord, that girl knew she was all that.
A quick glimpse around her place told me she was doing well and probably had a new boyfriend or two because she’d remodeled her apartment since my last visit.
“Hey, girl. Where you been?” RaShanda hugged me so tightly I had to catch my breath.
I hugged her back. “I been around. I tried to call before I came, but the operator said you changed your number. What’s up with that?”
“Oh, I was gonna call you with the new number. I was messing with this crazy Jamaican brother and he found out I was seeing someone else. Lord, girl, I thought the nigga was gonna kill me. So I changed the number.”
“I know that’s right.”
“Come in here, girl. You a sight for sore eyes. It has been a long time. What’s up with that?”
“You know, with school, work, and my man, I’m busy.” I waited for my words to register.
“Man! Looka here, looka here! The preacher’s gal done got her a man? I knew there was something different about you.” RaShanda lifted her shades then sniffed around me. A smile crept up on her face. “And you done messed around and got some too, didn’t you?” She broke into a singsong then slapped her hands together. “Little Miss Donna the virgin done lost her cherry. Hot damn!”
“What are you, a psychic? How’d you know that?” I was shocked. Although I wanted to talk to her about the anal sex issue, I had planned to pretend it was an unnamed friend’s problem. I meant to keep my new sexual liaison on the Q.T. for now, but my friend had already busted me.
“Girl, it’s all in the way you carry yourself. You used to walk all stiff. Now you’re walking with a li
ttle swerve in your hips. Turn around.”
“For what?”
“Just do it. Damn.”
I did as I was told, blushing the whole time.
“Damn, girl, you sure as hell been gettin’ some, and I don’t mean a little bit. Even your butt is bigger, and look at your titties. Somebody must be sucking on them puppies. Your shit is standing at attention. About time your horny ass went on and did it.”
I waved my hand at her with a laugh. “You’re crazy. You know that?”
“Maybe, but I can tell you doing your thing. You’re absolutely glowing! I’m so proud of you.” She pointed at the sofa and we sat. “How long you been doing it?”
“Couple months.”
She glared at me. “And you just getting over here to tell me? I oughta slap you, girl.”
“I’m sorry. I just been busy. It’s hard work keeping a man happy.”
“You think that’s somethin’, you should try keepin’ three happy. But that’s a whole ’nother story. Look, you protecting yourself? This AIDS is out here like a mother.”
“Yeah. I been using condoms and we’ve both been tested. I insisted on it just in case the condom broke.”
“That’s good, but them condoms ain’t enough. They can break. You get your ass down to the clinic too, and get you some pills or the shot for backup. You don’t wanna be like me. Babies ain’t no joke. By the way, how’s my other baby doing?”
She was talking about Dante. RaShanda and him used to have a sex thing back in the day. I’m pretty sure she took his virginity.
“He’s fine.”
“Damn, why couldn’t I have gotten pregnant by him? Now he’s baby daddy material.”
“ ’Cause I would have kicked your ass.”
“Oh, yeah, good point.” She changed the subject. “So, now that you gettin’ some, how is it? Is the dick good or what?”
