by O. M. Grey
Besides, if he knew what I truly was…well, there was that as well.
“A dance later, though. Promise?” The last thing I wanted to do was to make this man feel rejected. If he only knew my heart and my duty. Alas, that couldn’t be helped.
“Of course, my dear. It will be my greatest pleasure.” With that, he kissed my hand and took his leave. He would not inquire romantically after me again. No. A true gentleman allowed a lady her choice, respected her boundaries. He did not push or coerce or manipulate. He would not ask again, and it was for the best.
Indeed, it was for the best. I must believe that.
As if for a perfect illustration of his opposite, Willie McFerret laughed alongside Mr. Thomas Chenery, his beautiful wife on his arm. I curtsied and smiled as they passed me on their way out of the dining hall. Willie’s eyes fell on me but a moment and then whisked away. There was not the slightest indication that he knew me. Mr. Chenery, on the other hand, tipped his hat to me. A gentleman, that.
“I must have a pea!” a loud voice behind me demanded. I turned to see Doctor Nesbitt in a prolix appeal with one of the crew members who appeared to be the head butler for this gala. Forceful, although not at all in angry tones, the doctor spoke with pride and charm, every syllable.
“I’m sorry, sir, but we cannot distribute opium to our passengers,” the butler, at least, had the decency to speak in hushed tones.
“I demand it, sir. It’s been a long flight already, and I haven’t been home in weeks, you see. Weeks! Away from my family and university. Forced to perform over the holidays! What-what? I must have a pea, sir, or I shall not lead the stargazing tour tonight, and I shall not tell my tales of adventure and conquest tomorrow night. In fact, I daresay I shan’t do a thing! A pea, sir! It was part of the arrangement. See to it!”
“If we could find a pea for you tonight, sir, would you be able to procure more once in Paris?”
“Nonsense! I’m not paying for my own pea, man! I’m here at the behest of the Pearson’s. Lord Pearson and I are old friends, dear man. I should take this up with him and mention just how very incompetent his staff is. Pay for my own pea. Preposterous!”
While they were strapped in their conversation, I took the opportunity to slip behind the curtain and transform into my bait for the doctor. Claire, the chambermaid. I emerged young, innocent, and ever so perky. “Forgive me, sir. Beggin’ yor pardon, sir,” I said in Claire’s high voice and curtsied.
Doctor Nesbitt doffed his helmet to greet me, and the goggles straddling it fell off. He scrambled to pick them up and dropped his pipe in the process, breaking it two.
"Drat!" he cursed, collecting those pieces and the fallen goggles. After pocketing the pipe pieces and putting the goggles back on his hat—all thumbs and lanky limbs, that man was—he turned back composed and proper like none of that had just happened.
The three of us, had all watched this show of grace, astounded. I, or rather Claire, continued, “I couldn’t help but overhear, sir, but I might be of some assistance in this matter. M’lord brings opium with ‘im, sir, and I’m sure I can get a pea from ‘im, sir. ‘E’s a kind man, sir. A good man.”
The crewman shrugged, and the butler cleared his throat. “I don’t remember you in my staff, Miss. What is your name?”
“Weishart, sir. Claire Weishart. I’m a replacement, sir. Last minute, I’m afraid. M’lord offered me when he heard you was short one, sir.” There was always someone who couldn't show up, and by offering an opening, they usually filled in the rest of the information. I was not disappointed.
“Ah, you must be replacing Miss Kennedy. Yes, very good.” The butler turned to Doctor Nesbitt, who had his hands on his hips and commenced in tapping his toe, but the expression on his face was perfectly pleasant and patient. Eyebrows raised expectantly. “Follow her, Professor. She shall find something for you, sir. Please do let me know if you aren’t satisfied, sir, and we will get you sorted.”
“I should think so, dear man! Very good. Very good. Splendid, in fact. Yes. Oh, yes, indeed!” he said eyeing me as if I was a tasty strawberry tart or chocolate biscuit. “Lead on, dear girl! I’m right behind you. Oooooh, and what a sweet—”
“Yes, sir,” I said, interrupting him with a quick curtsey. “This way, sir.” I led him down to the cabin level, and his eyes never left my bustle. He didn't speak on the trip down to my cabin, except to exclaim, "Oh! Oh! Oh!" during a short burst of rustling clothes.
I did not turn around.
Once outside my door, I said, “It’s best if you wait down the hall, sir. It wouldn’t be good for M’Lord to find us in his room togeva, sir. No, sir.”
He twirled the edges of his straight black mustache, then pushed a stray, stringy strand of long, black hair off his face before laying a finger along his nose and winking at me, slow and deliberate, as if we shared a secret.
I already knew his secret, all right.
Once he was down the hall and around the corner, I slipped in my chamber and pulled a pea from my case. Perfectly prepared, as always, a reminder that research was always necessary.
After I rejoined Nesbitt, I dropped the pea in his palm.
“Thank you, sweet girl. You are quite young, aren’t you? Nary eighteen, I’d wager.”
“That’s right, sir. I’m seventeen, sir. I was lucky to get this job, I was. Well, you’ve got yor pea now, sir. I got to get back to work.”
“No. Please,” he whined. “You’ve been so kind as to help me in this. Please, just come out on deck with me for a few minutes and smoke it with me. Just a few puffs is all. You’ll have a much better time working if you do.”
“No, sir. I really shouldn’t, sir. It could be my job, sir.”
“Nonsense. I’ll talk to your employer if it comes to that, which I’m sure it won’t. Go on then, you’ll love it. Or is this a bit too grown up for you?” First clue, he didn’t respect the word no.
“A’course not, sir!” Well played, inserting an insult that a young girl would try to disprove.
“Besides, you wouldn’t leave me all alone now, would you?”
Playing on sympathy. “Well, sir. Just a few minutes, sir?”
“Of course, just a few. You can leave whenever you like. I promise.”
Unsolicited promise. Always a sure sign manipulation was underway.
“Nofink improper, sir?”
“Improper? Blimey! No! I am a gentleman, dear lady. A gentleman, I say.”
“Of course, sir. Forgive me, sir. I didn’t mean no disrespect, sir.”
“Come now. I bet we will see the moon over the water below. See how lucky we are to have met one another? You would be stuck below deck if it wasn’t for me. That’s right.” Establishing debt. “I bet not many of those working the ship will get to see the sights. Stick with me, Miss, and I’ll show you all sorts of wonders.”
The moon shone bright over the water so far below. It made the channel a black void beneath us, but it was beautiful just the same. The light of the moon caught waves as they moved. A funnel of candlelight cast on the otherwise blackness of it all. A single sliver of iridescent magic reflected in the abyss.
Doctor Nesbitt dug in his trouser pockets, very deep and rather toward the center. “I know I have my pipe somewhere. Oh!” he said with a suggestive lilt. “No. That’s not my pipe, but we might be needing that soon enough. Yes, indeed!”
Uncomfortable, I said, “Perhaps I had best just get back down below, sir.”
“Nonsense! Here it is, see?” He pulled out a long, thin pipe about the length of his hand from his coat’s pit. Its center was bamboo, and on either end was oxidized black metal, decorated with gold leaves. One end had the bowl and the other a golden mouthpiece. It was the finest opium pipe I had ever seen. “Got this in Japan last year. Great place, Japan. Loads of spinners there. Oh! Yes, indeed! Petit! Just like you, lovely. Just like you.” He dropped the pea in the onyx bowl and lit it. After breathing in deep, coaxing the pea to life, he passed it to me.
“I’m not sure, sir. Not while I’m working.”
“Go on, then. Just a puff. You’ll love it.”
“I really shouldn’t, sir.”
“Ah! Go on!” he insisted. Clear indication of a dangerous man, one that discounts a woman’s comfort level and refuses to honor the word no, which this man had done at least four times in just the past few minutes alone. He used most people’s, especially women’s, fear of being rude against them. Coercion, it was called.
So, not to be rude and slight this important man, just as a good working-class chambermaid would be afraid to do, I took a quick puff and inhaled, then coughed.
“That’s a girl,” he laughed.
Handing the pipe back to him, I shivered. “It’s right cold up here, it is, and I’m just in me uniform, sir. I had best get below before I catch my death.”
“Just a few minutes more, my dear,”—five times—“then I must prepare for my lecture and tour tonight. Come here.” He leaned against the wall, legs spread to match my height, and gathered me up in his arms, pulling me under his coat. “You’re really quite fetching, you know. I’d like very much to see you again.”
“Really, sir? A doctor and Oxford professor wants to make my acquaintance? You’re putting me on, aren’t ya? You just think I’m a tart, that’s all! You’re having a laugh at me expense.”
He didn’t try to hide his erection, rather he pressed it into my hip.
“Not at all, dear girl. Just the opposite. You’re real. A hard worker, I can tell. You’re loyal, too. All the girls I meet are just in admiration of my intellect or adventures, but you are just nice to me as a man. That’s rare.”
“I don’t know, sir. You have a family and all. I heard you say as much down below. What would yor wife say, sir?”
He sighed. “Oh, my wife. Yes. Well. Unfortunate business, that. It was one of those arranged marriages, I’m afraid. Here I am, only thirty-two, and I’ll never know love. Not real love. Cursed, I am. Doomed, even. She’s never loved me, you see. I haven’t felt the love of a woman in years.”
I looked up at him and tears filled his eyes. He met my gaze and amplified the piteous look.
Brilliant performance, as always.
“That’s terrible, sir. I don’t have much of a chance either, sir. Being a house maid and all. Many of us end up childless and without husbands. It’s a lonely life, I hear. But it’s a good job, sir. I ain’t like the fine ladies here on this ship, sir. I ain’t got much to offer a man. No dowry to speak of. Nothin’ like that.”
“Nothing to offer a man? Oh, dear girl! That is nonsense, indeed. You have everything to offer a man! Your beauty and kindness and innocence.” He kissed my forehead and then rested his cheek against it. “Might we just show ourselves enough kindness to give ourselves the chance of loving? Even if for tonight. Just let me love you tonight.” With those last words, he pulled back to lock eyes with men, then bent down to kiss me, but I pulled back.
Surprisingly, he let me.
“Not tonight, sir. No. I’ll lose me job, sir.”
“Then meet me in London, after we’re back.”
“All right,” I said, smiling up at him. “You mean it, sir? You think we could love each other?”
“If only for a few minutes, my dear. For everything is fleeting, isn’t it? Nothing lasts in this cold world, but I know we can love, dear girl. Yet, I want more than a few moments with you. I desire a real love, the kind that lasts forever. A proper courtship. We could have that, couldn’t we? Stranger things happen at sea, or in our case, over the sea. Isn’t that right, my lovely?”
“Oh, sir! You can’t be serious, sir! It would be so scandalous to take a maid for a wife, sir.”
“We’ll just see about that.”
“Do ya really think I’m so special, sir?”
He didn’t answer, just studied my face with the most serious expression, then tried to kiss me again. This time I let him. Yes, quite convincing for the lecher I’d seen in him. Charming when he wanted to be.
This young maid never had a chance.
“You’re trembling,” he said after he pulled away. “Let’s get you inside. So, you’ll meet me in London?”
“Yes, sir! I will, sir! Where? When? I can’t believe this is ‘appening to me, sir.”
“We shall work out the details later. Come to my chamber tonight after you’re off duty, and we’ll figure something out then. All right?”
There it was.
“Yes, sir! All righ’, sir!”
“Around midnight then?”
“Yes, sir. But not for long, sir. It’d be improper and all.”
“We shan’t do anything you do not wish, dear lady. I promise. Just to plan to meet back in London, that’s all. Number 619.”
“619. All righ’, sir. Thank you, sir. Have a good night, sir!”
“See you in a few hours, my lovely.”
“Yes, sir,” I said, gazing back at him like a girl falling in love. “You will.”
As I descended the stairs back into the belly of the ship, I was happy to transform back into Charlotte, if for no other reason than for the warmth of her clothing. It had been truly cold on the top deck, and Doctor Nesbitt showed he was capable of being likable, in a way. He was a master at coercion. That much was quite clear, so he would have had to be charming at some point. Perhaps his show of geniality was meant to be in stark contrast to the drunken lecher most see, increasing the feeling of specialness to the recipient of such warm behavior.
Well, tonight we would see what he was truly capable of.
My guess, violence.
CHAPTER TEN
ARTHUR
“I’ve already seen around the ship, Ava. I have no need of a formal tour. Wouldn’t you rather look at the stars? The doctor will be pointing out constellations and giving history and such. You like history.”
“I find that doctor altogether unpleasant. I do not wish to be in his company at all. Not in the least. True, I’m quite fond of history and mythology, but I’m also fascinated with technology, Arthur. You know that. I want to see parts of the ship I haven’t seen. I want to see the engines. Do you think they’ll take us to the engines?”
“Well I’m going on the stargazing tour, my dear. Join me if you will or no. Your choice.”
“Thank you, love. I’ll be fine on my own, after all, it’s how I’ve been most my life, and I got along just fine. We can meet again afterwards, no? For the dance.”
“Of course.” I kissed her on the cheek coldly and turned away, not sure how I felt about her spurt of renewed independence and determination.
“Have fun, love. Do tell me what you learned, won’t you?”
But I didn’t turn back. Fine with me after all, as I would get more time to talk with Chastity. Although that likely meant Emily would be there as well, but hopefully I would be spared from that bit of annoyance. It would be so nice to be free of all Bainbridges tonight. Indeed.
The schedule said to muster beneath the main mast. Muster. I loved that word. All these military sayings and such were quite entertaining. In the middle of the top deck, several pillars held up a cage, of sorts. Each pillar was the size of a tree trunk. This cage above didn’t hold the great balloon aloft. Not at all, the gases inside did that, of course, as well as hold the ship up, but in case of a problem, it kept the ballon from falling onto the top deck. Long ropes extended from around the balloon down to these masts as well, tied off on each, as well as on the sides of the ship. Perhaps the tour of the ship would’ve been more interesting after all. As I approached the center mast, I didn’t see Chastity, and the dullness of disappointment filled my chest. Neither was the doctor here. The group was a small one. Most stayed on the lower decks where it was warmer. Wise people.
The night air bit into my already cold skin. I wrapped a long scarf about my neck, although it would do no good. I had no body heat to keep in. Yet, appearances and all. Everyone looked quite comical in their goggles. Some of the ladie
s were complaining how the straps were mussing their coiffures and they would look affright for the ball.
“Good thing the main ball isn’t until tomorrow night, when all the prior activities are inside,” a woman’s voice purred in my ear. I turned, delighted to find it was Chastity.
“Good evening, Mrs. Rosengarten, I’m sure you look lovely beneath all those layers.” Her amber eyes shone out from behind her goggles and strands of that glorious red hair licked the side of her face from beneath the hood of her wrap.
“Thank you, Lord York. I do, indeed. And Miss Bainbridge? Shan’t she be joining us?”
“She opted for the ship tour, I’m afraid, so you have me all to yourself.”
“Wise woman, that. At least she’ll be inside for most of it. It is very cold out here. Is it eight yet? I do hope we begin soon, or I might have to forego stargazing for the string quartet. Or, perhaps, just turn in for the evening.” With the last, she slowed down the cadence of her speech and touched my arm. Yes. Ripe.
“Blimey! It’s cold!” Doctor Nesbitt said as he approached the group. “Good thing I brought my own warmth. Yes, indeed!” He wiggled a leather flask between his fingers, and several of the ladies giggled. Chastity did not. “Let’s get on with it, then. Shall we? Follow me!” After taking a giant swig that lasted several seconds, he led us all to the side of the ship.
“Do you mind?” Chastity said as she slipped her arm in the crook of mine. “It is so cold.”
“Not at all, dear lady. I shouldn’t have it any other way.”
“Gather ‘round! Gather ‘round! See up there? Just over there.” Nesbitt pointed up past the outside of the balloon, North Eastward. “There is Ursa Major, otherwise known as ‘Great Bear.’ It’s made up of seventeen stars and can be seen anywhere in the Northern Hemisphere. If you follow its back to its derriere, you find that the Big Dipper, made up of the seven brightest stars in the whole constellation, makes up the great bear’s hind quarters and tail. That’s quite a bustle, isn’t it, ladies. Yes!” He swigged from his flask again. “Pity it’s so cold out tonight ladies. You are all so bundled up. How about a quick peek at all your bustles? Go on then. That’s it!”
