by Denise Vega
THINGS THAT BUM ME OUT
I tried 2 call Mark but his mom said he was out… think he was there & didn’t want 2 talk 2 me.
Jilly said I handled it just fine & he needs 2 wake up & get a grip on reality but I still feel guilty.
HOT——METER
#1 Jeff Massey
#2 Jeff Massey
#3 Jeff Massey
#4 Jeff Massey
#5 Jeff Massey
#6 Jeff Massey
#7 Jeff Massey
#8 Jeff Massey
#9 Jeff Massey
#10 Jeff Massey
THINGS THAT MAKE ME SMILE
Rosie said Mark’s being a baby & maybe we should give him a pacifier. Gotta love her.
Jeff called 4 Chris & I got 2 talk 2 him… thanked me 4 coming 2 the game… said he hoped he’d c me again. Yes!
QUESTIONS TO FRUSTRATE ME
Why did Mark have 2 hold my hand & try 2 kiss me?
Why is he ruining things?
He totally agreed w/ the Harry & Sally thing & now he’s totally blowing it. Why can’t he just be my friend?—Guess what? On Monday, I’m going 2 find out.
CHAPTER 34
BLOWN OFF COURSE
“GOOD LUCK.” JILLY GAVE MY arm a squeeze as she left me near Mark’s locker Monday morning. “I hope you know what you’re doing.”
“I don’t,” I said, “but I have to try something.”
My heart raced when I saw Mark walking down the hall with two guys I didn’t know too well. When he saw me he stopped, then set his mouth in a straight line and kept coming.
“Can I talk to you?” I asked, stepping back as he opened his locker.
Mark glanced at one of the boys. “You do the algebra homework?”
I bit my lip. He was acting like I wasn’t even there.
“Do I ever do the algebra homework, bro?” the boy asked. He glanced at me, then back at Mark. “Want us to meet you later?”
“Nah,” Mark said, pulling out his books and closing his locker. “I’m done here.”
I stood there, staring at his locker, feeling like an idiot, feeling like a whole canyon had just opened up between us, not just a dozen feet of linoleum.
Tuesday wasn’t much better than Monday. Mark ignored me in class and he and Tyler sat with some other people at lunch.
“I didn’t know he could hold a grudge,” I said to Rosie. “What else don’t I know?”
“Just give him space and a chance to get a reality check,” Rosie said.
After school we had an I-Club meeting. We were counting down to the big launch next month so everything was being checked and double-checked. It was a good thing everyone was so busy. No one noticed that Mark and I never said a word to each other.
Except Reede.
“I feel a chill in the air,” she said as she leaned over my shoulder, watching as I made some color adjustments to the website background.
“Yeah, well it’s not coming from me,” I said.
“Told you he’s into you,” Reede said. “But don’t worry, it’ll work out.”
“What will work out?” Serena sat down at the computer next to mine, pulling up the Contact Us page she was working on last week.
“Nothing,” I said.
Serena clicked a few things on the screen. “This doesn’t have anything to do with the fact that Mark Sacks hasn’t been within twenty feet of you all day?”
Okay, so maybe other people had noticed.
“Can we just focus on our pages?” I said.
When it was time to go, Mark and Tyler were the first two out the door. I gathered my stuff and told Rosie to save me a seat on the activities bus.
Mr. F was pulling a trash can and bucket out of the custodian’s closet when I walked up. He looked down the hall, where Mark stood with a group of guys. “It looks like there’s trouble between two of my favorite people.”
“I guess I blew it,” I said. “Somehow I sent him the wrong signals and I don’t know how I did that.”
Mr. F tugged a tissue out of his pocket and wiped his brow. “Sometimes people see what they want to see, not what’s really there.”
“I guess.” I walked with him for a few steps. “What should I do?”
“Be his friend.”
“He won’t let me.”
“Give him time and don’t give up,” Mr. F said.
I glanced at the clock on the wall. “Oh, geez, my bus is going to leave,” I said. “Thanks, Mr. F. See you tomorrow.” We knocked fists and I took off.
That night I got to talk to Jeff because Chris wasn’t home yet. Apparently he wasn’t picking up his cell so Jeff had called the house. I was so excited that at first I couldn’t say much except “uh huh” when he asked me a question, even when I didn’t hear the question. I just liked listening to him so I leaned back against the couch and closed my eyes, letting the sound of his voice wash over me.
“So, you really eat raw pig’s eyes in the morning?”
“Uh huh—what?”
He chuckled through the phone. “Just making sure you were listening. I didn’t realize I was so boring.”
“You’re not boring,” I said quickly, afraid he might hang up. “I was just distracted by the TV. I’m turning it off.” Whew. Okay. Get a grip, Erin. Think of something to say. “So, are you ready for the Winter Park trip?”
“I went up skiing last weekend and will probably go up again this weekend,” he said. “Hope I won’t look too bad in front of the ladies.”
Twinge. But of course there would be other girls. Girls his own age. What was I thinking?
Mature. Be mature. “You’re a good athlete. You’ll do fine.”
“Thanks, Swift the Younger,” Jeff said. “I appreciate that. So maybe I’ll see you on the train. And on the slopes. You wouldn’t laugh at a North Carolina boy, would you?”
“Never,” I said.
“Cool. Tell your bro to give me a call when he gets in.”
The next day I was determined to give Mark his space and be his friend. I didn’t avoid him but I didn’t approach him either. I felt him staring at the back of my head all through history but he never poked me with his pencil or flipped my hair. And when the bell rang at the end of class, he jumped out of his seat like he’d been shot out of it. Unfortunately, he didn’t have a good grip on his books and stuff so everything went flying. I picked up some papers that had slipped under a desk and handed them to him. He took them without a word.
“I’m still your friend,” I said, “even if you’re not mine.”
He tried to get around me but I stepped over, blocking his exit.
“This is stupid,” I said. “Why can’t we be friends?”
Mark shook his head. “I guess I’m stupid,” he said. “I thought you felt… whatever.”
“I’m sorry if I did something to make you think… something,” I said. “I didn’t mean to.” I sucked in a breath and let it out. At least we were talking, even if it was about as comfortable as sitting on the push-pins that Serena put on my chair in second grade. “It’s just, well, it took me by surprise,” I said. “But I don’t want to ruin our friendship.”
Mark pushed me aside. “Too late.”
I followed him out into the hall. “It doesn’t have to be.”
He stopped so suddenly, I nearly ran into him. Whirling around, he faced me. “Is it that guy from the game? Do you like him?”
The question threw me off guard. “I—I don’t know.”
“You don’t know? How can you not know?” He shook his head, disgusted. “You like him, Erin. It’s obvious. But get a grip. He’s in high school.”
“So?”
“So, he’ll never go out with you.”
My stomach clenched. “I don’t even like him, okay?”
“Right,” Mark said, turning away. “Just don’t do something stupid.”
“You’re stupid!” I shouted, not caring how immature it sounded to say that. I stomped away, my eyes pricking. Blinking quick
ly, I tried not to sniffle until I was way down the hall, far away from stupid Mark Sacks and his stupid comment.
Wednesday, January 21
I can’t believe Mark said those things 2 me.
Jerk.
What does he know, anyway? Nothing. He doesn’t know abt my convos w/ Jeff, how we tease each other or anything.
I didn’t think it was possible, but I think I hate Mark Sacks.
HOT——METER
#1 Jeff Massey
#2 Jeff Massey
#3 Jeff Massey
#4 Jeff Massey
#5 Jeff Massey
#6 Jeff Massey
#7 Jeff Massey
#8 Jeff Massey
#9 Jeff Massey
#10 Jeff Massey
CHAPTER 35
ERIN’S EXCELLENT ADVENTURE
I WAS HOME ALONE SO I made myself some hot chocolate before spreading my books out on the kitchen table to start my homework.
“Oh, great.” I looked at the papers in my hand. Somehow I’d gotten Mark’s history study sheet along with mine when his papers flew everywhere after class today. As I tried to decide what to do, the doorbell rang. Holding Mark’s worksheet in my hand, I hurried to the door and peered through the peephole.
“Reede?”
She stood on my front porch, grinning like she’d won the lottery. “You’re going to love me,” she said. “Guess who’s sitting in that car, ready to take you for a ride?”
I looked around her. Jeff Massey was leaning across the front seat of a cool new sports car. Cloth top, too—a convertible. He waved at me through the passenger window.
“Oh, my God!” I said. “Are you kidding me?”
“I never kid about hot guys,” Reede said.
“How did you know? I—him—you know.”
“I have my ways.” She glanced around me into the house. “Is your brother here?”
I shook my head. “He’s out somewhere with Bethany. Is that why
Jeff is here?”
“I saw him at a stoplight and told him we should give you guys a ride.”
“But now he won’t want to if it’s just me.”
“Sure he will,” Reede said. “You’re hot. Besides, guys can’t resist showing off new wheels. It’s in their genes.”
I smiled.
“Once we’re on our way, I’ll have Jeff drop me off at Tower Records,” Reede said.
“No!” I protested. “You have to come, too. Really. It’s fine with me.”
“Well, it shouldn’t be,” Reede said. “Buck up, Swift. Can’t you handle being alone in the car with an older guy you have the hots for?”
My cheeks warmed. Did I have the “hots” for Jeff? That sounded so… unromantic.
“Of course I can handle it,” I said, turning back into the house. “I was just trying to be a good friend.” I folded up Mark’s worksheet and slid it into my back pocket.
“Yeah, right,” Reede said. I wasn’t sure if she meant that as a Yeah, right, no way are we friends or Yeah, right, no way is this about friends, it’s about you being too chicken to be alone with Jeff Massey. “And Jeff’s that way.” She jerked her thumb over her shoulder.
“I need to call my mom and tell her where I’m going.”
Reede gave Jeff a just-a-minute finger and followed me inside.
I dialed my mom’s cell quickly. When she didn’t pick up, I left a message. I also left a note on the white board on the fridge.
“Very Brady Bunch,” Reede said, tapping the white board with her polished nail.
“Let’s go.” I didn’t want her to start in about how lame my life was compared to hers. I grabbed my jacket and followed her out the door.
When I got to the car, I leaned down to look at Jeff through the passenger window. “Chris isn’t here.”
“He’s missing out,” Jeff said. “Hop in.” He raised his eyebrows above those amazing brown eyes.
“Reede can—”
“—sit in the back,” Jeff and Reede both said.
Omigod. Jeff wanted me in the front with him.
“Good,” I said, trying to sound confident, even though my body was shaking with nervous excitement. “I was about to call shotgun.”
Sliding into the front seat, I breathed in new car smell. Music blasted through the speakers, the car thumping in time. As Jeff peeled away from the curb, I reached for my seatbelt, then stopped. He wasn’t putting his on. It felt weird not to have the strap across my body but I didn’t want to look like a baby. I pretended I was admiring the seat and turned back to the front.
“Check this out,” Jeff said, pointing to the GPS system. Then the stereo system, where his Zune was connected.
“It’s amazing,” I said as he rounded a corner.
We dropped Reede off in front of Tower Records. I thought it was extremely cool of her to do this and mouthed thank you to her.
“Have fun,” she called, giving me the thumbs up before waving good-bye.
Jeff laughed and so did I. I wasn’t sure what we were laughing at—how crazy it was to think he and I might have a good time together? Or just because it was fun to be in an amazing car no matter who you were with?
Jeff turned to me. “So, where would you like to go?”
“Uh.” Where did I want to go with Jeff Massey in this incredible car? I shifted in my seat, suddenly remembering the worksheet in my back pocket. “If you wouldn’t mind, I have some homework I needed to take to someone.”
“Lead on,” Jeff said, turning up the volume on the stereo.
* * *
Several minutes later we were idling at the curb in front of Mark’s. “I’ll be right back,” I said as I opened the door.
“And I’ll be right here.” Jeff drummed his hands on the steering wheel.
“Be home, be home,” I murmured as I strode up the walk.
He was.
“Erin,” Mark said when he opened the door. “What are you doing here?”
“I found your study sheet stuck to mine in my backpack. I thought you might need it.” I held out the paper.
“Oh, thanks.” He squinted, looking over my shoulder. “Who brought you?”
I turned around, just as the passenger side window rolled down and
Jeff leaned over, waving. I waved back.
“Just that high school guy.”
Mark stared at Jeff for a second, then turned back to me, his face dark with anger. “I can’t believe you’d come here with him, knowing—” He stopped and pressed his lips together. His nostrils flared as he breathed hard through his nose. “Just don’t come crying to me when you get hurt.”
“I’m not going to cry and I’m definitely not going to get hurt,” I said. “You’re just jealous.”
Mark bit his upper lip, then looked right into my eyes. “You’re right,” he said finally. “But that doesn’t mean I’m wrong.” He stepped into the house and closed the door, leaving me alone on the porch.
Jeff honked from the curb and I turned and ran down the walk.
When I climbed into the car, I looked up at Mark’s house, checking to see if he might appear at one of the windows. But they were all like blank eyes, staring back at me. “Whatever,” I mumbled. Then I took a deep breath and turned to Jeff. “Let’s see what this thing can do, Mr. Massey.”
“Push that button,” Jeff said as we turned the corner at the end of Mark’s street. I leaned forward and pressed a black button on the dashboard. The roof started to rise.
“Whoooeeee,” I shouted, throwing my arms in the air.
“Whoooeeee,” he said back, and we both laughed.
Soon we were speeding down the highway, the cold wind whipping my hair around my face. I stopped trying to push it away, just let it go, ignoring the occasional sting as the tips pricked my cheeks. I felt wild and free, as if I could lift right out of the car and fly away.
I laughed out loud and let out another whoop.
Jeff grinned. “Cold?” he shouted, blasting the heater vents at m
e.
“Perfect,” I said, holding out my cold palms to feel the hot air against them.
Once, Mark’s angry faced popped into my mind and I felt a little twinge. Maybe I had been a little mean bringing Jeff to his house. But he was mean first. I pushed his face away and cleared my mind, enjoying the wind, the powerful feel of the car roaring beneath us, loving Jeff just a foot or so away from me.
“You having fun?” Jeff shoved me playfully.
“Yeah!” I tried not to grin like an idiot. I could totally be alone in a car with a guy I had the hots for. Totally.
We sped along, bouncing to the music, shouting the occasional comment over the noise—
—until it all came suddenly to a halt. Literally.
“Crap,” Jeff muttered as red, white, and blue lights flashed behind us. He pulled over to the shoulder of the highway and I cowered by the door, my heart pounding so fast, you would think I was on the most wanted list, afraid of being recognized.
But I calmed down as Jeff talked to the officer, who had this fabulous red hair she tied back in a ponytail. He was so polite and respectful and I felt proud to be with him. He yes, ma’amed and no, ma’amed all over the place with his sexy southern accent and I was sure she would melt into the asphalt—even though it was only about forty-five degrees out—because that’s what I felt like doing.
But she didn’t melt. She didn’t even drip. And even though she was very nice, she was rock solid. Not only did Jeff get a ticket for speeding, which meant he’d lose points off his license, but he also got a second ticket because neither of us was wearing a seatbelt. Colorado law on the highway. Jeff tried to tell the officer he was from North Carolina but she held tough.
“You’ve got a Colorado driver’s license and your car is registered here,” she said. “We expect you to know the laws of your new state.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
“I’ll help pay,” I said after we were on our way again. I was embarrassed that he’d gotten in trouble with me in the car, but oddly exhilarated too.
“Don’t worry about it,” he said. “I’ll charm them out of it.” He flashed me a smile, then asked me to pick out a playlist from his Zune. I was disappointed when we turned down my street and he pulled up in front of my house. I wanted to keep driving with him forever.
