by Sarah Morgan
Her father looked about to bluster his way out of it and then seemed to think better of it because he shrugged and then glanced at Rafael, a glint in his eyes. ‘Well, I’m proud of you now. You’ve hit the jackpot, that’s for sure. And good for you, Gracie, that’s what I say.’ He gave an unpleasant smile. ‘We’ll all benefit.’
Anger exploded inside her. ‘No, you will not benefit from anything! How dare you take money from those innocent people? We were doing something good with Café Brazil, Dad. And you tainted it. You took food from the mouths of innocent people.’
Her father made an impatient sound. ‘You always were a drama queen! Well, you’ve had your say so you can go now.’
‘I haven’t finished.’ Her knees were shaking and she wasn’t even aware that her fingers were digging into Rafael’s arm. ‘You stole from me, your daughter, and that’s terrible, but the final straw for me, the final straw, was when you made money by talking about Rafael in the papers. How could you stoop so low?’
Her father shrugged dismissively. ‘If the papers are willing to pay, let’s give them a story, that’s what I say.’
Grace turned away, distaste almost choking her. ‘You have no morals. You are a greedy, sad little man who isn’t even prepared to put the effort into making an honest living.’
‘And you’re so high and mighty!’ Her father’s temper finally exploded and he stepped towards her, his expression ugly. ‘Why should I take a lesson on manners from a thick, stupid girl who can’t even add up?’
In one stride Rafael reached him and punched him so hard that Patrick Thacker hit the wall with a sickening thud that made Grace gasp.
‘Rafael, no! You mustn’t.’ She grabbed his arm, frightened by the volcanic fury she saw in his face, and he turned to her with disbelief, barely contained anger shimmering in his dark eyes.
‘After everything he’s done to you, you still care about him?’
‘No.’ She shook her head quickly and then hesitated and her narrow shoulders slumped. ‘Well, yes, I suppose I do. He’s still my father. His behaviour has been awful and that’s really hard to come to terms with but he’s family and—’ she broke off and looked at her father, tears misting her gaze ‘—maybe I wasn’t the easiest of daughters.’
‘You’re doing it again, making excuses for people,’ Rafael growled, a frown on his face as he rubbed his bruised knuckles. ‘You always do that. People throw bad at you and you sift through it looking for the one grain of good that might be lying at the bottom.’
‘Yes—’ her voice was choked ‘—well, that’s who I am, Rafael. Sorry. Can’t change the person inside, wasn’t that what you told me? And anyway, if you hit him again you might seriously hurt him and I don’t want you in trouble because of me.’
A faint smile touched his mouth. ‘I’m already in trouble because of you, meu amorzinho,’ he said softly, his accent suddenly very pronounced. ‘Big trouble.’
Was he talking about seeing his name in the papers again? Unsure what he meant, Grace hesitated for a moment and then turned to her father, who was staggering to his feet, his hand pressed to his jaw. She stepped forward, blinking back tears. ‘Don’t even think about telling anyone about that punch or I’ll come after you myself and punch you harder. And then I’ll report you to the police for fraud.’
Her father moved his jaw gingerly. ‘You’d never be able to prove it.’
‘Why? Because I’m thick, stupid and I can’t add up?’ Her voice shook as she faced up to her father again. ‘I can prove it, Dad. Print one story about Rafael and I will prove it.’
Her father stared at her. ‘You wouldn’t do that to your dad.’
‘Actually I would.’ She straightened her shoulders. ‘You’re still my dad and I love you, but I don’t like you and I don’t respect you. Somebody told me recently that I should toughen up and I’ve discovered that they’re right. So I’m staying away from you until you’ve had time to think about what you’ve done. When you’re ready to apologise, you can start with Rafael. Oh, and one more thing—’ she lifted her chin ‘—the money that you made from that newspaper story. I want you to donate it to a charity for preserving the Brazilian rainforest.’
And then she felt Rafael’s fingers close around her wrist and allowed him to lead her from the room.
Curled up on the sofa in Rafael’s luxurious home in Mayfair, Grace stared sightlessly at the painting on the wall.
After her confrontation with her father, Rafael had virtually dragged her into the comfort of his limousine and instructed the driver to take them to his house. And now she’d been sitting on her own for ten minutes while he answered a pressing phone call.
‘I’m sorry to leave you like that …’ Rafael strode back into the room and cursed softly as he saw her sitting so still. ‘Stop thinking about him! He isn’t worth it.’
She stirred and looked at him. ‘How did you know I was thinking about him?’
‘Because it’s obvious. Knowing you, you’re sitting there trying to make excuses for your father’s appalling behaviour.’ He spread his hands in a gesture of exasperation and strode across to her, sitting on the edge of the sofa and taking her hand in his. ‘There is no excuse. You should have let me punch him again and then you should have told him that he was out of your life.’
Grace shook her head. ‘I couldn’t do that,’ she muttered. ‘He’s still my dad.’
Rafael let out a stream of unintelligible Portuguese and eventually switched to English. ‘You are incredible, no? Your father tries to destroy you and what do you do? You tell him that you love him! He doesn’t deserve your love!’
‘Everyone deserves to be loved.’ Grace wiped the tears away with the tips of her fingers and Rafael cursed softly and sat down on the sofa next to her.
‘You’re very upset, but now you must forget him for the time being.’
‘Yes.’ She managed a smile. ‘Sorry about this. You hate emotions and you’ve been subjected to a bucketload today. Newspaper stores, arguments with my father, emotional scenes. It must be your worst nightmare. How’s your hand?’
‘It’s fine and none of that amounts to anything when compared with the stress of the last week,’ he assured her, reaching across and pulling her onto his lap. ‘The moment you left I realised that I shouldn’t have let you go. There was no way you should have had to face your father on your own.’
‘It was my fight, Rafael.’ But she didn’t feel like fighting now and she snuggled on his lap, taking the comfort that he offered.
‘You’re not built for fighting. You don’t have an aggressive bone in your body. The moment you left I knew I’d made a mistake letting you go alone.’
‘Is that why you came after me?’
‘Yes.’ Rafael slipped his fingers under her chin and lifted her face to his. ‘I couldn’t stand the thought of you facing your father and then I discovered that you’d disappeared.’
‘When I saw that newspaper, I was terribly upset.’ She bit her lip. ‘Sorry. I know you don’t like emotional discussions, but you have no idea what it feels like to be completely let down by the only family you have.’ There was a long, throbbing silence and she felt him tense against her.
‘Actually, I do,’ he said hoarsely. ‘I know exactly what it’s like.’
She sat up straight on his lap so that she could see his face. ‘I thought you didn’t have a family? Are you telling me that your father let you down?’
‘My father let me down before I was born by leaving my mother to bring me up alone.’ He shifted her off his lap and rose to his feet, his shoulders tense as he strode across the room to the window. ‘Until I was eight years old she raised me on her own.’
Sensing instinctively that those demons were finally about to reveal their shape, Grace watched as he stared down into the street below. ‘You’ve never mentioned your mother before. You lived in Rio?’ Her gentle prompt made him turn.
‘Yes.’ His eyes glittered hard and cold. ‘In one tiny room, wi
th barely enough space for one person to live, let alone two. It was a miserable existence. And then my mother met a new man.’
‘She fell in love?’
He gave a faint smile and there was mockery in his eyes as they lingered on her face. ‘Always the romantic, aren’t you? No, meu amorzinho, it wasn’t love. But he was very wealthy and she saw how marriage to him would significantly improve her lifestyle. There was only one problem. He wasn’t prepared to take on someone else’s child.’
Shocked, Grace stared at him. ‘He told you that?’
‘I overheard them talking.’ He stuffed his hands in his pockets. ‘They were in the process of arranging for me to go into a local children’s home.’
Grace shook her head in an instinctive denial of what was coming. ‘She didn’t mean that, surely,’ she said softly. ‘Perhaps she thought if she said that then he’d come round and make you a family.’
‘He didn’t want a family, Grace. Or at least, not someone else’s.’
‘Your mother put you in a children’s home?’
‘No. I didn’t let them do that. I left home.’ He gave a smile of self-mockery. ‘You see? Even at the tender age of eight, I was determined to be in control of my own destiny. There was no way I was just going to let life happen to me.’
‘But you were eight years old.’ She lifted both hands to her face and shook her head, unable to bear the thought of him alone at such a young age. ‘How can you take charge of your destiny at eight years old? What did you do? Where did you go?’
‘I stole money from his wallet and then I packed a bag and climbed on a bus. I went as far as the money would take me.’ His tone was flat and without a trace of emotion. ‘I climbed off the bus and I stood by the side of the road, wondering what on earth I’d done. I suddenly realised I had nothing to eat or drink and nowhere to sleep.’
Grace’s eyes filled. ‘You must have been so afraid and so lonely.’
‘Well, I realised that if I stayed by the side of the road then someone might well pick me up and return me to Rio. So I walked into the rainforest.’
‘The rainforest?’ She stared at him, appalled, remembering her own experience in similar surroundings. ‘You wandered into the rainforest on your own and you were only eight? But that’s so dangerous. Snakes, spiders—’
‘I was never bothered about snakes and spiders but I hated the ants and the noises bothered me at first.’
‘At first? How long did you stay in the rainforest?’
‘A month.’
She rose to her feet. ‘You lived in the forest on your own for a whole month? But you were just a child, Rafael; how did you do it? What did you eat, drink?’
He shrugged. ‘I ate fruit. Berries. Drank water that I probably shouldn’t have drunk but it didn’t do me any harm. It’s true that I was a great deal thinner by the time they eventually found me.’
‘Your mother found you?’
He gave a twisted smile. ‘Oh, no. I doubt she ever bothered looking. She was, I’m sure, extremely relieved to have had the problem removed from her life.’
‘So if your mother didn’t find you, then who did?’
‘Carlos.’
‘Carlos who owns the fazenda?’
‘That’s right. I’d strayed onto his land. He took me home to Filomena. They fed me, gave me some clean clothes because mine were pretty filthy by then and gradually drew the story out of me.’
‘But they didn’t send you away?’
‘Oh, no, they didn’t do that. They took me in and I never left.’
It explained so much about him. ‘So that’s why you love them so much,’ she whispered and he gave a faint frown as if he hadn’t considered the nature of the bond before.
‘I owe them everything. They gave me a home and security.’
‘But they couldn’t make up for what your mother had done.’ Grace walked towards him, her hands outstretched. ‘It’s no wonder you don’t trust women. It isn’t just about your ex-wife, is it? It started a long, long time before that. And you were so, so young.’
He hesitated and then took her hands. ‘I suppose at a very young, impressionable age I was given the message that a woman will do just about anything if the price is right. Even give away her child. Amber’s behaviour was simply more of the same; she used pregnancy as a lever to get me to marry her. I never had any reason to change my view of women.’ His eyes found hers. ‘Until I met you. I owe you an apology.’
Her eyes widened. ‘For what?’
‘For not believing that you were innocent.’ His fingers tightened on her hands. ‘The thing is, Grace, I’d never actually come across truth and innocence before, so when I finally did I didn’t recognise it.’
‘You have nothing to apologise for.’
‘I hurt you by not believing in you. And I hurt you by not using romantic words when I took you to bed.’ He cursed softly and hauled her against him. ‘I’m useless with emotions, Grace. It’s like another language. I just don’t know any of the right words. You’re going to have to teach me.’
Her heart thudded against her chest and she shook her head and covered his lips with her fingers. ‘Don’t. Don’t say that,’ she urged softly. ‘It’s fine. It doesn’t matter. I know you can’t say the words and I know you don’t do commitment but I’m yours for as long as you want me. We don’t have to talk at all if you don’t want to.’
His eyes glittered. ‘You’d do that? You’d stay with me without any sort of commitment?’
‘Of course. How can you doubt it?’ She brushed her fingers over his brow. ‘I just want to be with you. I love you, Rafael. And I don’t expect you to love me back, but I want the chance to make you happy for as long as you’ll let me.’
He was still. ‘You love me?’
‘Of course. How can you even ask that?’
‘But you didn’t come back to Rio. You vanished for a week. If I hadn’t tracked you down you would have been out of my life.’
‘Because that’s what I thought was best for you. My father will always cause problems between us.’
‘Forget about your father.’ He studied her face. ‘Why would you stay with me? What do you get from me in return?’
She smiled. ‘I get to see parrots and butterflies, I get to swim in a forest pool but most of all I get to sleep alongside a man who makes me feel like a woman for the first time in my life.’
His eyes were full of dark shadows. ‘I ought to be telling you to run. I ought to be telling you that I won’t be good for you because I’ve never been good for anyone in my life. But I’m too selfish for any of that. I want you. And I always go after what I want.’
‘And I’m glad you do. Telling me to run wouldn’t make a difference, anyway. I’m not leaving until you’ve had enough of me. And I know you haven’t.’
‘I’ll never have enough of you.’ He took her face in his hands and stood looking at her for so long that she started to feel nervous.
‘What? What’s the matter?’
He didn’t reply and his breathing was unsteady, as if he was dragging something out from deep inside himself.
She frowned. ‘Rafael? What’s wrong?’
‘I love you, too.’ He spoke the words hesitantly, with none of his usual confidence. And she felt her heart perform a series of elaborate acrobatics in her chest. ‘I never thought I’d say those words to anyone. I never thought I was capable of feeling love. But I am. With you.’
She opened her mouth but he shook his head.
‘Don’t interrupt me,’ he said hoarsely, a flash of humour in his eyes. ‘I’ve never done this before so I might get it wrong if you interrupt me.’
Grace didn’t feel capable of speaking so she just stood, trapped in a bubble of happiness as she listened.
‘You arrived in my forest and you were so gutsy and optimistic. You were prepared to fly all that way to try and talk me into saving your business and no matter what I did or said, how horrid I was, you seemed to find it impossible t
o see bad in me.’
‘I didn’t see bad in you,’ she said quietly. ‘I saw pain and disillusionment. But nothing bad.’
‘You tramped through the rainforest without a word of complaint—’
‘I loved it—’
‘And then you came to my bed.’ He looked her direct in the eye and let his hands drop to his sides. ‘You were a virgin, weren’t you?’
Colour bloomed in her cheeks and she opened her mouth and closed it again.
He rubbed his fingers over the bridge of his nose and gave a soft curse. ‘I thought so. It took a few days for it to sink in but then it did. Why did you do it, Grace? Why did you give so much?’
That was easy to answer. ‘Because I wanted to. I think I fell in love with you almost immediately even though I knew that didn’t make sense. I just wanted to be with you. In every way possible. I didn’t care about the consequences.’
‘I’ve never met anyone like you before,’ he muttered, sliding his arms round her again and hauling her against him. ‘You are so incredibly generous and you take nothing back.’
‘Yes, I do.’ There was humour in her eyes as she looked up at him. ‘I made you sit with me for hours going through numbers. For most people that would have been torture.’
‘Not for me,’ he assured her, lowering his head and capturing her mouth with his in a brief but devastating kiss. ‘You do realise, don’t you, that I’m not going to let you go?’
‘You’re not?’
‘No.’ He lifted her hands and she felt him slide something onto her finger.
‘What’s that? Oh—’ She stared in amazement at the huge diamond that now adorned her hand and tears filled her eyes. ‘I told you, I didn’t want jewellery.’
‘It isn’t jewellery,’ he informed her in a tone that sounded more like himself, ‘it’s a statement of possession. My corporate branding. It tells the world that you’re mine. Don’t ever take it off.’
