by Holly Jacobs
She wasn’t laughing now. She scowled at him, but it did little to disguise the fact she’d been crying.
“Are you okay?” he asked.
“I saw you at the meeting. I was fine then, and I’m fine now.”
“Liar,” he said. “Are you going to invite me in?”
She paused, and for a moment he thought she’d throw open the door and let him in. Instead, she positioned her foot behind the door, as if she was worried he’d push his way through, and said, “No.”
Colton sighed. “We need to talk.”
“No. Everything that needed to be said has been said.” She turned her head slightly, probably to disguise the fact she was wiping at her eyes, but he saw it. “We’ve said it all, Colton.”
She was wrong, of course. There was so much more he should have said at the wedding, and even after. There were questions he should have asked.
But he didn’t say or ask any of those things now. He was pretty sure she wasn’t ready to answer. “It’s about Mattie and Finn’s wedding.”
“That’s all you want?” Her suspicion was apparent in her eyes.
“That’s all.” He crossed his heart and held up two fingers with one hand, and crossed his fingers on the other. He wanted so much more than that.
“Fine,” she said grudgingly. “Come in. But the first time you deviate from the topic of Finn and Mattie, you’re out of here.”
He followed her into her kitchen. There were certain things about Sophie’s house that said home to him. The fairy-tale look of it from the outside. The bold plaid couch in the living room that she liked to curl up on, under her clashing plaid quilt. And this kitchen. It wasn’t so much the look of it, but the smell of it. Cookies, bread, coffee...it smelled of comfort. Those scents always made him think of Sophie.
She pulled out a chair at the table and nodded her head to indicate he should take the one on the far side, as far from her as she could put him. “Shoot,” she said.
As he took the seat she’d indicated, the fact she’d been crying was even more apparent here in the window’s light. He wanted to ask what was wrong. He wanted to ask about Tori, about how things were going between the two of them. He wanted to say so many things, but he was a man of few words, which normally didn’t bother him, but now, when there was so much he wanted to say and didn’t know how to, it did.
He settled for saying, “Finn’s worried that I’d feel awkward being paired with you in their wedding party. But they’d really like to put Sebastian and Lily together since they’re together and so that leaves you and me.”
“That’s fine.” Sophie wasn’t being quite as monosyllabic as she used to accuse him of being, but she was coming close.
“That’s what I told Finn, but I’m not sure he was buying it.”
“I’ll make sure Mattie understands,” she assured him.
He nodded but didn’t say anything more.
“So is that it?” she prompted.
“How are you really? I saw Tori leaving when I pulled up.” He didn’t want to know; he needed to. He missed so many things about Sophie. He missed her smiles, her laughter. He missed her sharing bits of her day and asking him about his. Oh, he was never overly effusive, but she didn’t seem to mind. She accepted statements like I planted the corn. Got in a load of manure. It didn’t matter what he said, she accepted it, and seemed to be pleased she was sharing his day.
She stood. “Okay, that’s it. You’re out of here. You got your answer to your question—one that could just as easily have been texted to me, or I could have answered while you stood on the porch. So, go.”
“Not to point out the obvious, but you’re carrying my baby.” He was getting tired of this. She was acting as if she were the injured party. As if he’d lied to her. Well, he’d always told her the truth. She’d met his family and friends. She’d seen his mother’s collection of his embarrassing baby pictures and heard about all his childhood missteps.
And she’d shared none of her own past with him. Not that she had living parents. Not that she’d given birth to, then given up, a daughter.
She was not the injured party and, yet, as she stared at him, taking a deep breath as if trying to calm herself, she had the look of someone who’d been hurt. Someone who’d been hurt badly.
Once they’d talked about everything and anything. Okay, obviously not everything. But what they had discussed they’d done so with ease. Nothing about Sophie was easy anymore.
She spoke quietly but firmly. “And if you’d asked about the baby—who’s fine, not that you did ask—I’d have answered, but you didn’t. And I warned you to stick to the Finn and Mattie topic. You didn’t listen. So go.”
He stood and looked down at her. “When did you get so stubborn?”
She wasn’t the least bit cowed. She took a step toward him, and said, “There’s a good chance I was always this stubborn, but I simply hid it away.”
“Well, I think the two of us should hope that stubbornness is not a genetically inherited trait.”
“Yeah, well, I guess we should also hope that loyalty—or lack thereof—isn’t genetic, either.” With that parting barb she simply walked out of the room. He heard her stomping up the stairs.
Evidently, that hadn’t gone well.
And what was her crack about loyalty?
He’d never been anything but loyal, and truthful, too, he might add.
But somehow she felt he’d been less than that.
CHAPTER NINE
SUNDAY MORNING, Sophie waited nervously for Tori and her parents.
She’d spent the past day replaying her last argument with Colton. She’d accused him of not being loyal, and that couldn’t be further from the truth. He hadn’t shown her a lack of loyalty, but rather... She groped for the right word.
She wanted him to give her a chance to explain about not telling him about Tori and her parents. She wanted him to understand how much thinking about her childhood had hurt—still hurt.
She wanted him...
She wanted him to love her. Maybe be angry. Maybe be disappointed, but to simply love her, regardless.
Her parents’ love had always been conditional. We love you if... If you’re the best. If you get straight As. If you are polite. If you don’t make waves.
She got up and looked out the window, watching for the Allens’ car.
Well, she wasn’t going to do that to Tori, or to the baby. Her hand rested on her stomach, as if she could protect her child.
No matter what Tori decided to do today—stay the week at Sophie’s or return home—Sophie would accept her decision and be supportive.
She watched as the Allens pulled into the driveway and Tori got out, backpack in hand.
Sophie let out her breath. That was a good sign. A good indication that Tori was staying.
She opened the front door before the family even walked up the stairs. “Good morning,” she said.
Tori didn’t respond, but walked past Sophie as if she were invisible and then straight up the stairs.
Gloria and Dom came in, and Gloria patted Sophie’s shoulder as she walked into the house. “She’s angry.”
“I don’t blame her,” Sophie admitted, and led the couple into the living room. Gloria and Dom sat on the couch, and Sophie took the chair. Watching them sitting close enough to touch, despite the fact they had the whole couch, made her feel alone and isolated in the chair.
“I wasn’t sure she was coming back,” she admitted.
“She claims she had to come back because she has an obligation to the library,” Dom said. “And while that’s part of it, I don’t think she’s ready to leave, even if she’s angry.”
“I offered to spend the week at JoAnn’s, if Tori wanted, and she said no,” Gloria added.
Sophie wasn’t sure what precisely that meant, but she took it for a good sign. “I understand that she’s mad at me. I’ve disappointed her again.”
“It will all work out,” Dom promised.
&nbs
p; Gloria reached over and took his hand. “That’s my husband, the quintessential optimist. It’s one of the reasons I married him.”
“That and my manly good looks.”
Gloria snorted.
They were trying to hide their worries in order to calm her own. She gave them a small smile.
“There, that’s better,” Dom said. “Just remember that Tori, despite her maturity and intelligence, is still only a teen. That, in and of itself, is more angst than anyone should have to deal with. This entire situation is confusing. She worries that if she likes you too much, or loves you, she’ll somehow diminish what she feels for us.”
“We’ve tried reassuring her that we’re not threatened. Well, at least Dom’s not threatened, and I’m not threatened most of the time. I worry that she’s still mad I didn’t tell her, and that she’s going to discover that she likes you more and wishes you’d raised her.”
Sophie started to protest.
Gloria held up her hand. “Those moments are few and far between. Dom’s right—she can’t have too many people loving her. And she’s decided to stay with you, which is a good sign. It doesn’t mean she won’t make your life a living hell this week, but remember, you can call us anytime. And if it gets too bad, I’m only two hours away. Less if Dom’s not in the car making me obey the speed limit.”
“I’ll call,” Sophie promised, and she chatted with Tori’s parents a few more minutes, then walked them to the door. “Tori, your parents are leaving.”
Tori stomped down the stairs, kissed her parents goodbye and, after they’d pulled out of the driveway, said, “I’m going to go over to Joe and his little sisters’ house.”
It wasn’t exactly asking for permission, but at least Tori had spoken to her. Sophie liked Joe and his sisters. They were regulars at the library, and she knew that Sebastian was particularly close to the family. “Okay. If you go anywhere other than their house, please text me.”
“I’m staying there for dinner,” Tori added.
There went any hopes of talking to Tori at dinner.
“Okay. Remember, home by eight.”
“This isn’t my home,” Tori threw back as she walked out of the house, slamming the door behind her.
This was going to be a very long week.
* * *
SOPHIE MADE IT THROUGH the silent treatment Sunday night when Tori arrived home at precisely eight and stomped up to her bedroom.
She didn’t hold out much hope of Tori’s silent treatment lessening the next morning...and she wasn’t disappointed.
Before Tori walked out the door, Sophie said, “I’ll be out tonight. I didn’t think you’d mind. I’ll leave your dinner in the fridge.”
“I don’t need you to cook for me,” Tori responded.
“Fine. But there’s money in the jug on the counter if you want to buy something to eat. I’m going to the diner to meet Mattie and Lily. I want to tell them about the baby.”
This gave Tori pause. “You really haven’t told them yet?”
“Really. I told Colton, since he deserved to know. And I told your parents because I worried the news would be hard on you and wanted them to be ready to help you.”
“But Mattie and Lily are your best friends.”
“Yes. But I needed to tell my family first. Now that you all know, I’ll tell them. I didn’t think you’d mind having the house to yourself. But like I said, if you want dinner you can come join me and Mattie and Lily, or you can take money out of the jug and sit somewhere else there. Whatever you want.”
“Sophie, I...”
Sophie didn’t respond. She simply waited.
“I’m pissed, and I know it’s not fair to you or the baby, but still it’s there. I thought I was done being mad at you. You’ve been nothing but nice to me. But when you told me, all that anger I had earlier bubbled back. I want to scream, Why keep that baby and not me?”
“Tori, I—”
“Yeah, I know. You didn’t want to give me up. I had a nightmare about you crying to hold me, only I wasn’t a baby, I was me, and...” She shook her head. “I’m not really mad at you. I’m just mad. Dad says I’ve gotta own my feelings, so I’m owning it, and trying to work it out. But it’s not really you.”
“Well, maybe it’s partly me,” Sophie teased, and was rewarded by the smallest smile. “You take whatever time you need. You can be as mad at me as you need to be. You can even be mad at the baby.”
“It’s not the baby’s fault,” Tori protested.
“No, it’s not.”
“And I know it’s not really yours, either.” Tori sighed as if it would be easier to be mad at Sophie if it were indeed her fault.
So Sophie offered, “Would it help if I did something totally wrong and unfair you could be mad about? I mean, I could make you go change your outfit, but I like it and it’s tasteful, so that won’t work.” Tori had on a cute pair of pink jeans, an orange tank top and a pale yellow cardigan. The colors sounded as if they’d clash, but they all blended perfectly. “Or I could...” Sophie let the sentence fade as she mulled over another unfair act.
“Yeah, you’re truly the big evil if the best you can come up is threatening to make me change my clothes.” Tori laughed. It was a bit stilted, but it was something.
“That was always my parents’ concern. How I looked. Mom made me change my outfit more than once.” Sometimes her mom didn’t insist that she change; she’d simply say, You’re going out looking like that? And Sophie had known that “like that” meant her outfit didn’t stand up to the Moreau-Ellis standards.
Tori looked sympathetic. “Sorry.”
“I didn’t say it as a sympathy ploy,” Sophie said.
“I know. But still, I’m sorry. You go see Mattie and Lily. What time are you meeting them?”
“At five,” Sophie said.
“Well, maybe I’ll come over around five-thirty, after you’ve told them, and grab my dinner with you.” Tori was looking at some indistinct spot on the floor.
“I’d like that.”
She glanced up and said, “I’m still pissed.”
“That’s okay.”
Tori sighed. “You know, it would be easier to be pissed if you didn’t seem to accept my anger as your due.”
“But it is my due. I abandoned you and now I’m having a baby that I’m keeping. I accept your anger because I understand where it’s coming from.”
“You did what was best for me, and you gave me to Mom and Dad. I wouldn’t be the me I am now if you hadn’t. And you like this me.” Tori echoed Sophie’s own words back to her.
“I do.”
“Yeah, sometimes I do, too.” Tori opened the door. “I’m going to be late if I don’t leave, but even if I’m still pissed, I’m not pissed at the baby. It’s my little brother or sister. Last night, I watched Joe with Allie and Mica. They adore him. They make him crazy, but he adores them, too. I couldn’t help but think, I’d have a sister or brother like that. I’m pissed, but it’s not a bad thing.”
Sophie started to cry. “Sorry. I spent years allowing myself to own my emotions, but even if I hadn’t, these pregnancy hormones would have made holding them in impossible.”
Tori hugged her and said, “I gotta go,” then left.
Sophie watched her daughter flee down the block toward the library.
She glanced at her watch and hurried off to her meeting with Rich Keith. She’d arranged to meet him off-site, not wanting to run into Colton.
Right now, it was all she could do to handle Tori.
* * *
COLTON PARKED ACROSS from the township building, because as far as he could tell, half of Valley Ridge was on Park Street today. The main street of town was generally busy, but this was ridiculous. He admitted that a city person would scoff at the idea of this being busy, but he didn’t live in a city for a reason.
He didn’t wonder if it was always this busy and he’d never noticed because he rarely came into town during the summer. He was too busy
at the farm. Which was where he should be now.
He looked straight ahead as he marched past buildings and a few people. He wasn’t in the mood for small talk. He wasn’t in the mood for doing much of anything but sitting home and brooding, and that wasn’t an option.
Especially not after Mrs. Nies let it slip that Rich and Sophie had a meeting this morning at the coffeehouse. Neither were there when he arrived, but Mattie let it slip that Sophie was going over to the diner.
He walked into the diner and wished he could silence the stupid merry bell that rang as the door opened. He scanned the crowded dining room and spotted Sophie at a back booth. He marched through the tables filled with friends and neighbors, and stopped in front of Sophie’s booth. “You’re here.”
“Thank you, Captain Obvious.” She looked apologetic as she said, “Sorry, that wasn’t necessary. Yes, I’m here.”
If she felt bad for being snarky, maybe she’d be easier going. “May I sit down?” He shot her what he hoped was an endearing smile.
She scowled. “No.”
Obviously, feeling bad about snapping at him hadn’t softened her attitude. Colton sat anyway. “You met with Rich at the coffee shop.”
“The coffee shop is still part his, and it’s Mattie’s. I needed to see her about tonight, so it worked out well. I came here to wait for Lily and do some paperwork.” She nodded at the files on the seat next to her. “Not that I owe you an explanation.”
“You were talking to him about the winefest.”
She nodded. “Yes.”
“Well, the winery is mine. I still own controlling shares. If you want to talk about it, talk to me,” he said calmly. “You’re avoiding me.”
“No, I’m not,” she denied. “I’m not seeking you out, but not avoiding you.”
They had to stop going round and round in circles, rehashing the same things. Colton switched topics. “Have you told Mattie and Lily?”
“That’s what tonight’s get-together’s about. Thank you for waiting. You have every right to tell Sebastian and Finn.”
