by Debra Oswald
DOROTHY: As if that creates a kind of force-field around her.
CELIA: I know this is not logical. But somewhere deep in the animal guts of me, I believe that my dark chanting will be some protection for my child.
DOROTHY, CELIA and SHEENA remain onstage as lights come up on:
Night. ZOE and KIERAN are asleep on the ground.
ZOE jerks awake, panicky. KIERAN sleepily reaches out to comfort her.
KIERAN: Hey… hey… Bad dream again?
ZOE nods. KIERAN hugs her close.
You’re shaking. Tell me the dream. Get it out of your head and gone.
ZOE: Oh… I don’t know…
KIERAN: Where were you in the dream?
ZOE: I was walking through an underground carpark. The people wandering around—I knew they were dead… the way you can just know stuff in a dream?
KIERAN: I get you.
ZOE: I recognised faces. Sandor, this kid from primary school who died, my father. I always had photos of my father in my mind, but I never imagined him dead. He was dead before I was even born.
KIERAN: Maybe it’s a beautiful thing—seeing your dad like that.
ZOE: There were others—people who aren’t dead yet—only in the dream they were. I knew their internal organs were turning liquid, like soup.
KIERAN: Zoe—
ZOE: Then I saw you and me sprawled out. Dead. Our bodies were rotting… liquefying and gelatinous, like a stain on the concrete.
KIERAN: Oh, Zoe. We’re not dead. Look at us.
ZOE: But we will die. That’s the truth of it.
KIERAN: We won’t die.
ZOE: One day.
KIERAN: But not now. Here we are—alive.
He wraps his arms around her.
Don’t have dreams like that. Wake me up next time. Promise?
ZOE: Nothing you can do about what goes in my head. The ugly thoughts filling up my head.
KIERAN kisses all over her forehead.
KIERAN: If I could make them go away, I would. I would.
ZOE continues to shake, lost in the ugly images.
Maybe I should’ve never brought you to Sydney.
ZOE: What? You make it sound like I’m some silly, little girl you led astray.
KIERAN: No, no, I never said—
ZOE: I wanted to come here, didn’t I?
KIERAN: You did.
ZOE: I wanted to meet your friends, see things, do stuff. Don’t you make it sound like I’m some little girl who can’t handle the big, nasty world.
KIERAN: Zoe… I’m not doing that. Why are you saying this stuff?
ZOE: That’s what you think, isn’t it? That I’m some hopeless—
KIERAN: No, no. But we should’ve kept it just you and me. This place isn’t right for us. We never had fights before.
ZOE: You think I’ve wrecked everything. You’re saying—
KIERAN: No! What do you want me to say? Fuck, Zoe. Fuck.
KIERAN’s flare of anger hits ZOE like a blow.
ZOE: You hate me.
KIERAN: Don’t talk shit. I don’t.
ZOE: Yeah. You hate me.
KIERAN: I don’t know what you want to do. One minute you want to BASE-jump off the tallest building in the universe—
ZOE: And the next minute I’m too scared to go out the door.
KIERAN: Yeah. I guess. Yeah. And the times when you get down, I never know if it’s my fault or—
ZOE: It’s everything. Hating myself… people being so disgusting… feeling like I can’t handle anything.
KIERAN: Should I take you back home?
ZOE: I knew it. You want to get rid of me. You wish you’d never laid eyes on me.
KIERAN: No, no, the day I laid eyes on you was the most perfect day—the day I realised something could be so good.
ZOE goes over to him.
ZOE: I’m sorry.
KIERAN: You’re not sorry you ever came with me?
ZOE: No, no, no. I wouldn’t want to miss out on anything.
KIERAN: Oh, baby, you’re cold. Hey—we’ll head north. Get ourselves back into a proper rhythm. Person’s gotta have some sunlight on their body. We’ll drive right up the coast. Yeah?
ZOE: But the car…
KIERAN: Yeah. Sheena’s car’s stuffed. We need a car that can get us where we need to go. And cash for petrol and whatever. I’ll talk to Mick. He always knows how to get money together fast. We’ll head north, make it good again.
KIERAN folds ZOE against him as they exit.
CELIA, DOROTHY and SHEENA are still onstage. All three address the audience.
CELIA: Early on, the emails that came drove me crazy. No idea where they came from.
DOROTHY: Messages from nowhere.
CELIA: But at least I would know she was alive.
SHEENA: Mum rang me. To say the police had turned up at her place.
DOROTHY: Looking for Kieran.
SHEENA: The cops found my car dumped on a street way out past Liverpool. I had to head back to Sydney to sort it out.
SHEENA exits.
DOROTHY: The emails from Zoe stopped coming. Then one night I saw headlights pass my house. Celia driving back alone. She is staying inside the house now since three weeks.
CELIA: I used to love the smell of winter here—the windbreak pine trees sharp and clean. Now the smell makes me nauseous. When I first came back, people dropped by to check on me. I pretended to be asleep. I couldn’t bear trying to act like a normal person. Now I can hibernate undisturbed because no one comes. I check for emails. Nothing. The earth’s crust has split open and sucked my daughter down where I can’t find her.
CELIA goes inside the house.
SCENE THREE
Daytime.
JOE waits in a pub. SHEENA enters.
SHEENA: Hi.
JOE: Hi.
They are awkward, not sure how to approach each other. JOE lurches forward to give her a peck on the cheek.
Thanks for meeting me.
SHEENA: Mum’s de facto said you rang the house.
JOE: I didn’t know how else to find you.
SHEENA: Well, y’know… it’s fine. How’s Celia?
JOE: Not good. That’s why I’m here. Have you had any contact with Kieran?
SHEENA: No. But the cops came to see me yesterday.
JOE: Wanting to find him?
SHEENA: Yeah. They found his fingerprints at a break-and-enter.
JOE: In Sydney?
SHEENA: Just out of Sydney. One of those huge, show-offy houses on ten acres. The place’d been really trashed. Owner’s two dogs had their skulls smashed in with a brick.
JOE: Did the police say anything about Zoe?
SHEENA: They mentioned a girl but they wouldn’t tell me anything else. Mystic Sheena has a feeling in her bones it has something to do with Mick the Scumbag.
JOE: And you have no idea where Kieran is now?
SHEENA: No. I could look for him. Talk him into handing himself in to the cops before things get any worse.
JOE: I think that’s a good idea. When Kieran needs legal help, call me, won’t you?
SHEENA: You don’t have to feel like you owe me anything.
JOE: Kieran will need help. I’m able to offer some. That’s all.
SHEENA looks at him, then nods.
SHEENA: Thanks.
An awkward silence.
JOE: Fiona and I have separated. I’ve moved out.
SHEENA: Oh.
JOE: It was a long time coming, really.
SHEENA: Fair enough.
JOE: Anyway, look, I’m going to see what I can find out about Zoe. If you hear anything, please let me know.
SHEENA: Sure. I wouldn’t get your hopes up. Zoe might not want to be found.
JOE: No. But I have to try. Any information is going to make it easier for Celia.
SHEENA looks at JOE.
[Rattled] What?
SHEENA: I get it. You came here because you’re looking after Celia. She’s the reason.<
br />
JOE: Oh… yes, in a way, but also—
SHEENA: No, no, don’t apologise for it. It’s nice. Be nice to have someone to look out for you. I mean, everyone wants that.
JOE: Yeah.
SHEENA pulls a face then shrugs.
SHEENA: Anyway, I’ll check out the scabby palaces my brother crashes in. I’ll call you if I find anything.
SHEENA exits, then JOE.
SCENE FOUR
Daytime. The peach farm.
DOROTHY enters with a basket of food containers.
DOROTHY: [to the audience] I leave food on the doorstep every day. Celia eats enough to live. [She looks towards the shack.] Early this morning, I’m thinking I saw something moving near the shack. But then I think, ‘Dorothy, the dementia is getting you now, old chicken’.
There is a sound from the shack.
[Calling] Celia! Celia! Come quickly! Someone is here, I think. [She approaches the shack.] Hello? Are you there, someone? Or are you an animal?
CELIA emerges from the house, squinting against the bright daylight.
CELIA: Dorothy, what’s going on?
DOROTHY points to the shack just as we hear more noise.
Who’s there? Zoe? Is someone there?
DOROTHY: [to the audience] You could see how much she was hoping. Oh, don’t hope too much.
All goes quiet.
CELIA: Both of us are imagining things that aren’t there.
CELIA turns to go back inside.
DOROTHY: [to the audience] Then the hope is gone and that’s even worse.
There is another noise from the shack. CELIA grabs a lump of wood as a weapon.
CELIA: Zoe? If there’s someone there, come out.
KIERAN comes out. He’s filthy, his face battered and scabbed from recent injuries, frantic, barely coherent.
Where’s Zoe?
KIERAN: Is she here?
CELIA: Where is she? Tell me where she is!
KIERAN: I don’t know. I thought she’d come home—is she here?
CELIA: No! When did you last see her? Did she say she was coming home?
KIERAN: No. I don’t know where she is. That’s why I—Is she here?
CELIA: I told you no.
KIERAN paces aimlessly, winding himself up.
KIERAN: Where is she? Fuck. Fuck.
CELIA: Listen to me, you little piece of shit, you tell me right now where I can find her.
KIERAN: I don’t know.
CELIA: Where did you last see her?
KIERAN: Sydney—well, near Sydney. But then she disappeared.
CELIA: Give me a list of places I can look.
KIERAN: I already looked every place I could think. If I knew where she was I wouldn’t be here. That’s why I’m—You’re trying to trick me… asking me—She’s really inside, isn’t she?
CELIA shakes her head.
She’s in there and you won’t let me see her. [Calling past CELIA to the house] Zoe! Zoe! It’s me! [To CELIA] I just wanna talk to her. Please. Let me talk to her.
CELIA: I told you—
KIERAN: She’s inside. She’s asleep in bed, tucked up in bed in her old room, isn’t she?
CELIA: No. She’s not.
The wretched way CELIA says it gets through to him.
KIERAN: Oh… she’s really not here.
DOROTHY: No.
CELIA: The last time you saw Zoe, she was okay? She was in one piece?
KIERAN: Yes. Yes.
CELIA: Where is she now? Do you know where?
KIERAN: [shaking his head] I’ll wait for her. She’ll come back home. If I had a place like this—I’d come back here. I’ll wait.
CELIA: Get off my property. I don’t want you anywhere near this place.
KIERAN: I can see why you hate me. But I can’t go. I have to see her.
CELIA: If you don’t get off my property right now, I’ll ring the police.
KIERAN: That might make trouble with the cops for Zoe. I know you don’t want that.
CELIA: Just get out of here, you little shit. I don’t want to see you. Get out of here!
KIERAN: [backing away] I’ll get off your property. But I can’t go away. She’ll come back here. I’m sorry to be a shit. But I’ll do whatever I have to do to see her. You can’t make me go away.
CELIA: Get out of here! Go!
KIERAN runs off.
I should go to Sydney. Find her.
DOROTHY: Where? The boy can’t give you any useful information. Look at him.
CELIA: No, but—
DOROTHY: What if the boy is right? What if Zoe comes back here but you’re gone?
CELIA: He seems so sure she’s coming home.
DOROTHY: He does.
CELIA exits.
[To the audience] For two days and two nights, the boy waited on the roadside near the gate. He was drenched with rain, bitten by the morning frost. But he did not budge himself. I heard Celia shout at him, ‘Go away!’ Like a person snarling at a stray dog. But Kieran didn’t budge himself. I offered him a bed for the night at my house. He said, ‘Thank you, but no’. He was afraid that if he moved from his watching spot, he would miss Zoe coming home. I think too that the biting rain, his poor, battered face, Celia’s vicious shouting—the boy thought he deserved this kind of punishment.
CELIA comes out of the house, peering down the road.
[To CELIA] The boy wants to ask you a question.
CELIA doesn’t respond, hard-faced.
DOROTHY: Two nights he’s been out there.
CELIA: If I could get the police to drag him away, I would.
DOROTHY: But all he wants—
CELIA: If he can’t help me find her, he’s no use to me.
DOROTHY signals to KIERAN at the gate.
DOROTHY: [calling] Kieran! Come up here! Kieran! [To the audience] People might say I was an interfering, old, mad lady. Sometimes old, mad ladies should interfere.
KIERAN enters. DOROTHY gestures to him to address CELIA.
KIERAN: I was wondering if… Has Zoe called you?
CELIA: No.
KIERAN: You don’t have to tell me if she’s called. I mean, that’s your right.
CELIA: She hasn’t called.
KIERAN: I should’ve talked her into calling. I’m really sorry.
CELIA: Are you?
KIERAN: Yes. Yes. I’m so sorry. I stuffed everything up. I know that.
CELIA: Why did you and Zoe get separated?
KIERAN: Because I’m such an idiot. I wreck everything. I don’t mean to but I make dumb, dumb, dumb mistakes and… it all gets stuffed up.
KIERAN, in his distress, rubs and pulls at his face.
CELIA: Don’t do that. You’re making yourself bleed.
KIERAN: I’m sorry, y’know… I’m really sorry.
CELIA: Hey. Hey. Look what you’re doing.
She grabs one of his hands to pull it away from his face.
Don’t do that to yourself.
KIERAN looks at his hands, bloody from the reopened injuries.
What happened to your face?
KIERAN: Oh, I… uh… I fell.
CELIA: Above your eye should have been stitched.
KIERAN sways a little, groggy.
Sit down a minute. Don’t fall over.
KIERAN: Not eating, I guess.
CELIA: Sit down for a minute.
Meanwhile DOROTHY has fetched a first-aid kit from the shed.
DOROTHY: You can use this.
KIERAN sits on a pile of palettes and CELIA cleans up the cuts on his face and puts on steri-strips.
CELIA: Keep still.
KIERAN is still and obedient as she works.
This might sting.
KIERAN: No worries. Thanks. Already hurts anyway. Thanks.
CELIA: When you last saw Zoe, how was she?
KIERAN: I don’t want you to think it was always bad. To begin with, things were great. Me and Zoe looked after each other and we—
CELIA: Where did you go when y
ou first left here?
KIERAN: All over. Looking for picking work.
CELIA: You got work?
KIERAN: Yeah. We lived out of the car which was fine because it was warm enough to sleep out. Plenty of amazing fruit around to eat—right there in front of us. So we ate healthy and found rivers to swim in and stayed away from trouble. I want you to know that. No trouble.
CELIA: You said something about the police.
KIERAN: Well, yeah, yeah… But until things went bad, it was good.
CELIA: Why did you give up the picking?
KIERAN: No matter where we went, Zoe could suss people out really quick. She’s excellent at talking to people, isn’t she? She’s so smart.
CELIA: Do you think she’s in Sydney now?
KIERAN is too sleepy to answer. CELIA lets him flop back and close his eyes as she exits.
DOROTHY: [to the audience] Celia let the boy sleep that night in the shack.
CELIA re-enters and hands KIERAN a clean t-shirt.
CELIA: Clean yourself up.
KIERAN retreats and changes his shirt. CELIA stays in the yard, staring down towards the road.
DOROTHY: [to the audience] The boy hanged around but watchful, like a dog that is worried it might get a sharp kick any minute. Celia, she was tearing between the urge to smash at this boy and her need to hear him talk about Zoe.
KIERAN ventures closer but keeping out of CELIA’s way.
CELIA: When Zoe wanted to go to Sydney, what was in her mind? Did she say what she—?
KIERAN: ‘Dive into everything headfirst’—that’s what she said. Oh, I’m not making excuses. I should’ve known it was a bad idea.
CELIA: Why?
KIERAN: Things went off the rails. My fault. And Zoe started getting really down.
CELIA: Down?
KIERAN: Sometimes she’d get so dark. I’d say, ‘Come on, Zoe, we’re the lucky ones’. I’ve seen people be slack or straight-out cruel to the exact people they’re supposed to be looking after. I knew what me and Zoe had was good—because I’ve seen the other ways it can be. But some days she’d sink into a black hole so deep you couldn’t even yell down to her. That’s why I panicked. I didn’t think straight… I stuffed up.
KIERAN starts to cry.
CELIA: What happened?
KIERAN crumples at CELIA’s feet.
KIERAN: You gotta believe I’d never do anything to hurt Zoe. I thought we could look after each other. Please believe me. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.
CELIA stares down at the boy sobbing at her feet. Eventually she reaches out, touching his hair. He grabs onto her legs and she freezes, startled. Then she leans down to rub circles on his back, like someone soothing a young child. Finally, she helps him to his feet and leads him inside the house.
