by M A Comley
“I would have told her in my own time,” he informed the inspector before replacing the phone to his ear to hear Debs’ further tirade of abuse.
“You have never treated our daughter right. You don’t deserve to have the title of father as you’ve never been there for her, not after you ran out on me.”
“And whose fault was that?”
Debs gasped. “Why, you, downright piece of scum.”
“This isn’t helping, Deborah. For your information, I feel like shit, but rant away—selfish as usual, discounting anyone else’s feelings in the process.”
“Screw you. No, don’t, I’ve already done that and it wasn’t a pleasurable experience. The only good thing that came out of our time together was Adele, and now, you’ve fucking lost her.”
“Don’t hold back, say what you mean, Debs. You can’t make me feel any worse than I do right now, I can assure you. I’m handing you back to the inspector, thanks for your support and understanding, as usual.”
Before she could fire off another bout of abuse, he shoved the phone back in the inspector’s hand.
“Hello, Deborah, it’s DI Cobbs again. Yes… I assure you, we won’t let you down. The team is here in force. If your daughter is out there, we will find her. You need to have faith in us… yes, okay, I’ll pass that message on to Martin. Take care, hopefully we’ll be in touch with some good news for you soon.” The inspector ended the call and tucked her mobile into her jacket pocket. “She asked me to pass on her apologies for having a go at you. I’m sure you’ll forgive her in the circumstances; you’re both fraught, and emotions are running high, off the scale probably.”
“Well, at least that’s one thing. You have to understand, Inspector, none of this was deliberate. We’re just a family on holiday, trying to ensure the kids have fun. The fact we took our eye off Adele for a moment will haunt us until she comes back to us. Please, please make that happen.” His gaze drifted to the lake, and he pointed at the inviting still water that always seemed to mesmerise younger children. “Shouldn’t you be searching the lake?”
“In time. That will be our last resort. There’s every possibility she could be close by, hiding behind a craggy rock or any of the numerous mounds of grass in the nearby fields.”
“Okay, I hear you. What do you need me to do? I can’t stand around here doing nothing, it wouldn’t be right.”
“Maybe set off in that direction, don’t go too far. Call out her name. She’ll be scared, hearing your familiar voice might encourage her to come out of her hiding place. Keep it light and simple. Don’t let her pick up on your frustration or anger, it could have a detrimental effect.”
“Grant me with some sense.” He stormed off towards the road and muttered, “Fucking coppers know fuck all about how to deal with kids.” Hmm… maybe that could be aimed at me, too. Otherwise, my darling Adele would be with us now.
Louise called out to him, “Martin, come back. Where are you going?”
“To search for my daughter. You know, the one you took your eye off.”
He switched off, ignoring Louise’s wounded response. He was hurting too, inside and out. All he wanted was to hold Adele, to comfort her and tell her everything was going to be all right. He struggled to fight the sensation that he would never see his daughter again, not until he passed away and met up with her in heaven.
Shit! I can’t think that way. I’ll find her, if it takes every last breath in my body to do it.
4
Martin searched the immediate area high and low for over an hour, keeping a constant eye on what the emergency services were doing around him at the same time.
Louise, Matilda and Jake had drifted back to the car. He felt no remorse for speaking to Louise the way he had; he couldn’t get past the truth—all this was her fault. He needed someone else to blame other than himself. Deborah was correct to point out the obvious. He shouldn’t have been off playing with Jake; he should have sat down with Adele, seen to her needs, tried to get reacquainted with her after the months they’d spent apart. All well and good thinking that when it’s too late.
He wandered back to where the inspector and sergeant were standing. The inspector was issuing orders to the latest arrivals: another six uniformed coppers, a mixture of genders. When the group dispersed to carry out their instructions, Martin drifted closer. “Can I have a word?”
“A quick one. What do you need to know, Mr Jenkins?”
“It’s Martin.” The inspector nodded. “Where are we at?”
“As you can see, more and more officers have come to join in the search. I’ve asked a couple of them to begin taking down the witness statements. After speaking with the crowd, I have to tell you, it’s not good news. No one saw or heard anything out of the ordinary, not until Louise cried out.”
“Helpful… not!”
“It is what it is. Hopefully, the rescue team will report back with their findings soon. Maybe you can search the car for anything that belongs to Adele; I know you said the likelihood was negligible, but it might be worth a try.”
He looked back at the car. Louise was staring at him, her mouth down at the sides. She wiped her nose on a tissue and then twisted in her seat to speak to Matilda and Jake. He was undecided whether to approach the car or not after treating her so badly.
How could he take the damaging words back, even if he wanted to?
The truth was, she’d let him down. As much as he didn’t want to dwell on it, how could he bear to look at her in the same way ever again? This was an incomprehensible mistake to make by anyone’s standards. How did one even begin trying to defend Louise’s actions? On the other hand, why should I? If Adele had gone missing while I was watching her, people would be whipping my arse good and proper for letting my daughter down.
“Go on, you’re going to have to speak to each other sooner or later,” the inspector urged, appearing to read his mind.
He faced her and shook his head. “I can’t, not yet, it’s too painful. I know this was a simple accident, but the fact remains the same: she should have been keeping a vigilant eye on Adele, that lapse in responsibility is hard to accept.”
The inspector sighed and shook her head. “You’re being too hard on her. If you didn’t trust her, why leave your child with her in the first place?”
“You’ve twisted my words, I never said I didn’t trust her. Never mind, I need to be alone for a while, to wallow in self-pity, if you will. The last thing I want to do right now is go over there and tell Louise everything is going to be all right and that I forgive her, because I haven’t got it in me to do that. Not yet… maybe I’ll never be able to do it. Perhaps I should send her and her little family packing; I’ll stay here alone to try and find Adele. Yes, that’s what I’ll do.”
He went to walk back to the car, but the inspector grabbed his arm. “You’d be wise to mull that thought over a few times before you decide to put it into action. I fear if you take that route, there’ll be no going back in the future. Is that what you truly want? To mess up your support network?”
He shrugged her arm off and expelled a large breath. “I’m confused, I don’t know what I want. No, I do, I want my daughter back in my arms, but I can’t see that happening anytime soon, can you? You might be thinking I’m a right bastard for acting this way, but answer me this… how the hell would you be reacting if it was your child who had gone missing? Do you think you’d be skipping around here, whooping with joy? I doubt it.” Annoyed, he ran a hand around the back of his neck. “Anyway, don’t tell me you’re not trying to weigh up my reactions, in the hope I might slip up and reveal that I’m behind my daughter’s disappearance after all.”
Inspector Cobbs raised an eyebrow, glanced at the lake as if biting back a snarky response, then her attention was drawn back to him. “If you think that, Martin, then I have to tell you that you’re gravely mistaken. I believe you, I believe in you, and Louise come to that. This was a genuine mistake and apportioning the blame isn’t going
to get you, as a family, anywhere. Go over there and make your peace with Louise, for all your sakes. While you’re there, see if there is anything in the car belonging to Adele that the rescue dogs can use for tracking.”
“Okay, I’ll go and do that. As for speaking to Louise… well, I’m sorry, I don’t think I’d be able to keep my anger in check long enough to hold a conversation with her.”
“That’s your prerogative. I’m putting it on record that you’re wrong in your decision-making.”
He grunted and trudged over to the car on weary, heavy legs. The fight in him was dwindling fast and he sensed exhaustion was about to hit him with a devastating force.
Louise smiled as he opened the car door. “How’s it going?” she asked, her voice hoarse with emotion.
“It’s going. I’m not here to chat. I’ve come to search the car for any of Adele’s possessions, to give to the rescue team. Apparently, the dogs will be able to pick up on the scent.”
“Good thinking. Matilda, Jake, is there anything in the back that belongs to Adele? Look on the floor, under the seats, if you will.”
“Here, I’ve found this.” Jake held up a small fluffy cow with a keyring attached. “She was playing with it for a while on the way up here.”
Martin smiled at Jake. “Thanks, you’re a star, Jake. I’ll get this back to them.”
Louise reached for his hand. He snatched it away before she could touch his flesh. “Martin, don’t push me away. I feel bad enough as it is. Please, don’t punish me further.”
“I’m not. Maybe that’s your guilty conscience pricking you.” He slammed the door shut and ran back to the inspector. “We found this. Jake said Adele was playing with it on the way here yesterday. Will it do?”
The inspector took a latex glove out of her pocket and snapped it on. “The less added scents on it, the better, I think. It’ll help, I’m sure it will.”
“Sorry, I should have thought about that.”
“It’s fine, I wouldn’t expect you to consider it as evidence.” She looked behind her. “There’s a member of the team now. I’ll give it to her.”
He watched the inspector trot over to the Land Rover and hand the keyring to the female rescuer, who accepted it with a nod and a smile. Then the inspector returned to tell him, “She thinks it’ll make a huge difference. She’s put in a call to summon the dog handlers back from the search.”
Martin held up his crossed fingers. “Thank God. I hope it helps.” His gaze drifted skywards at the darkening clouds overhead. “Looks like it’s going to piss down soon.”
“I just said the same to my people. I’m sure it won’t hamper the search. Have faith that we will find her. How did things go with Louise?”
He shook his head and sighed. “Not good. I backed away as soon as Jake handed me the keyring. I haven’t got room in my heart to forgive and forget just yet.”
“I suppose it will take time.”
Four hours later, Martin was sitting on the grassy bank, wet through after yet another storm cloud had unburdened its heavy load over the picturesque area.
“Martin, you need to get out of those wet clothes,” Louise said, just behind him.
“I know what I need to do, and it’s not that. Go back to the car.”
“How long are we expected to wait here? The kids are getting anxious and restless.”
“Your kids, you mean. My child is still missing, in case you hadn’t noticed.”
“Can you change the record, Martin? I’m done with your accusatory tone. For the last time, I’m sorry. Why can’t you accept my apology and move on?”
He pushed up onto his feet and stood nose to nose with her. Louise shrunk back as if she feared he was about to strike her. “Don’t push me, Louise. You have no idea of the turmoil going on in my head or in my heart. My child, my five-year-old daughter, is out there on her own. Probably shit-scared and hurt for all we know, and you’re standing there telling me that your damn kids are getting restless. Jesus, have a heart, woman. Put someone else’s concerns before your own for a change.”
Louise turned to walk away, her shoulders rising and falling as the tears emerged. “You’re a heartless bastard. I’ll get a lift back to the cottage, pack up our stuff and head back to Liverpool. I’m done with you treating me like a piece of shit, like a fucking stranger.”
“Don’t bother getting a lift. Here, take my keys.” He threw the car keys, and they landed in a puddle by her feet.
She swivelled to face him. “What? How will you get home?”
“Who cares? I’ll stay here until my daughter is found. I refuse to stop searching for her. Others might, but I won’t.”
Just then, a car screeched to a halt alongside them, drawing Martin’s attention away from Louise.
“Oh, great, that’s all I effing need,” he grumbled as he watched Debs exit the vehicle and tear across the muddy bank towards them.
She stood in front of him and demanded, “Any news?”
“No. Not yet. What in God’s name are you doing here? You should have left all this to me. I was going to keep in touch with you. There was no need for you to drive all this way.”
“I had to come. You would have done the same, if you were in my position. I could no longer sit staring at the phone, willing it to ring. She’s my daughter; I have a right to know what’s going on when it happens, not second-hand with details omitted by my angry ex.”
“As if I would? Jesus, grant me some sense, Deborah. Get back in the car and go to a hotel or something. I could do without the extra stress of having you around here.”
“I refuse to. Who’s in charge? Where’s that inspector I spoke with earlier?”
He pointed at the police car on the other side of the road. “She’s in there, keeping warm with her sidekick, I shouldn’t wonder.”
“That’s not fair, Martin. You know as well as I do, she’s only just got back in the car after hours of standing around out in the rain,” Louise piped up.
“Whatever. If I’m out here in the wet, then she should be as well. Anyway, what are you still doing here? I told you to go home.”
Debs’ gaze flitted between them. “What’s going on here? Why are you angry with Louise?”
He shrugged, held his arms out to the side and let them drop again. “I didn’t tell you over the phone. It was Louise who was watching over Adele when she went missing.”
Louise’s head dipped and she mumbled an apology.
Debs instantly flew at Louise, fists and nails striking her body and face. Louise just stood there and accepted her punishment. In the end, it was Martin who intervened, pulling Debs away from his girlfriend who was now cowering from the attack.
Jake ran across and flung his arms around his mother’s waist. “Leave my mummy alone,” he shouted.
Debs sobbed and hid her face. “I’m so sorry. Sorry. Sorry, I didn’t mean to attack you.”
Louise glared at Martin and Debs, then flung her arms around her son. “Come on, Jake, let’s go home.”
That was the last interaction Martin had with her that day. His heart sank deeper than it ever had before. He tentatively placed an arm around Debs’ shoulders. “It’s okay. She’ll be fine. Come on, let’s get you in the car.” He guided her back to her vehicle and saw Inspector Cobbs coming their way.
“What was that all about?” the inspector demanded to know.
“A misunderstanding. You wanted me to tell Debs the truth; you witnessed the outcome of that deed.”
“Jesus, is Louise all right?”
“I suggest you ask her that question, not me,” Martin said. He peered over his shoulder and heard Louise start the car. “You’d better be quick, she’s on her way back to Liverpool.”
“What? Without you?”
“Yes. I can’t stand to be around her and her kids a moment longer. And yes, I feel like a bastard for saying that, but it happens to be the truth.”
“You have a bizarre way of dealing with this situation, Mr Jenkins.
I fear you’re going to regret your actions in the days to come, months even.”
“Maybe I will. At the moment, it feels like the right thing to do. Now, if you don’t mind, Debs needs to hear all the facts from me.”
“I can’t disagree with that. Nice to meet you, Deborah. I want to assure you, the team are still out there doing their best to find Adele.”
“Good. How long is the search going to last? These things have a time limit I take it?” Debs asked.
“Any case I work will be in accordance with the guidelines set out by headquarters. It depends if any clues or evidence surfaces.”
“Has there been any so far?” Debs swiped at a tear which had slipped onto her cheek.
“No. Sadly, nothing has come to light as yet. We’re hopeful something will show up soon.”
“Before the night descends, you forgot to add that part, Inspector.”
Martin nodded. “Yes, what happens then?”
“Hopefully, it won’t come to that. I’ve called for extra backup, volunteers are joining in the hunt. I’m sure it’s only a matter of time before she’s found. Please, keep faith in us and what we’re doing.”
“It’s hard, especially when you’ve all been at it for hours and are no further forward, Inspector,” Martin reminded her unnecessarily. “Come on, get back in the car, Debs.”
“I’ll leave you to it. Will you be sticking around?” Cobbs asked.
“Of course. We’ll sleep in the car if we have to. I’m sure Debs will agree with me.”
“Yes, I agree. We need to be here in case Adele finds her way back. One thing that rattled through my mind on the journey up here…”
The inspector inclined her head and asked. “What’s that, Deborah?”
“Are you looking into the possibility that Adele was taken? Abducted?”
“No, don’t say that!” Martin pleaded. He released his hold on Debs and paced back and forth. “Why haven’t we considered that?”
“It’s something that has crossed our minds, Martin. We’ve asked all the witnesses if they saw anyone walking with a child, but none of them had, so I put the thought to bed. It’s a tough call to make. I suggest, in the interim, we stick to the idea that Adele has wandered off.”
