“I feared you would say that.” Reynard smiled ruefully. “But I had to ask.”
“Go and ready yourself for the journey.” Nicola motioned. “We’ll take a cart, so we can bring Simon back. Then there will also be room for this young woman whose help you seek.”
Reynard and Glennyth left and Nicola began to dress.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
“No wonder you usually ride to Mordeaux.” Glennyth grimaced as the cart bounced over another rut in the trackway.
“’Tis not normally so rough. But having FitzRandolph’s whole army pass this way has made a mess of the road.” Nicola hardly noted the constant jostling; her thoughts were too focused on Simon. Now that she could finally bring him to Valmar and raise him as her own, she’d begun to have doubts. In Simon’s mind, Hilary was his mother and Joanie his sister. Although he was fond of Nicola, it was in the way he might be fond of an aunt or a much older sister. How would he adjust to living at Valmar, away from the only family he’d ever known?
The thought of it dampened her joy. At last she would be able to claim Simon as her son and have him in her life, but was it the best thing for him? And how could she explain her concerns to Fawkes? As a man, he wouldn’t understand how difficult a change like this might be for a young child. He would consider only that Simon was his son and therefore should be raised in their household.
“Despite the bumpy ride, there are other advantages to traveling like this,” Glennyth said. “We are moving quickly, but not so quickly I can’t enjoy the passing scenery. ’Tis interesting to note the differences between this part of the forest and the forest around Valmar. The woods are denser here, perhaps because they cut fewer trees to provide fuel at Mordeaux. Certain plants that I have difficulty finding near Valmar might grow in more abundance in this area. After we get to the castle, if there is time, I’d like to explore a bit. See what herbs I can find.”
“I think there would be time for that,” Nicola answered. “After all, I can’t grab Simon and whisk him away to Valmar as if he was puppy newly weaned from its mother. First, I must get him used to the idea he’s going to live at Valmar.”
“I’m sure it will be difficult for him in the beginning.”
“He’ll also be leaving Joanie. They’re very close.” How could this be, that she’d finally obtained her heart’s desire and all she could think of was the challenges and problems she faced? “I can’t help wondering if I’m doing the right thing for Simon. He’s so young. I don’t want to upend his life and make him unhappy. I fear he’ll be lonely at Valmar.”
“Did you mention these concerns to Fawkes?”
“There were too many other things to deal with. And in truth, I’ve not thought about much of this until now. I was so focused on my goal of having my son be part of my life that I never considered what it might be like for him to leave the only family he’s ever known.”
“Perhaps there can be some sort of compromise. You can bring Simon to Valmar to meet Fawkes and spend some time there, then take him back to Mordeaux. Gradually get him used to the idea that you and Fawkes are his true parents.”
“Such an arrangement would probably be best for Simon. I could accept such a compromise, knowing it would better for my son. But Fawkes…” She shook her head. “Men don’t understand how easily children can be hurt, and how that hurt can change them forever. Simon is such a happy, sweet boy. ’Twill break my heart if I do anything that damages his sunny nature. But of course Fawkes will want Simon to be tough and strong, not sensitive and sweet.”
“You never know. So far Fawkes has surprised me. He is uncommonly sensible for a man. Perhaps if you explain these things to him, he’ll come to understand your concerns.”
Despite Glennyth’s attempts to reassure her, Nicola could not help fretting. There didn’t seem to be a good solution, other than having Hilary and Joanie come to live at Valmar. But that would mean they would be separated from Gilbert. How could she ask that of Hilary, who had been such good and loyal friend?
As they started up the trackway to the castle, Glennyth scanned the area, as if seeing it for the first time. “There are a few villeins living here.” She motioned to the handful of houses near the river. “But you couldn’t really call it a village.”
“I suppose not.”
Glennyth nodded thoughtfully. A few moments later she turned to Nicola, hazel eyes gleaming. “If I am to remain at Valmar, my cottage would need to be rebuilt. What would you think if I decided to build it here instead?”
“But why? There are far fewer people here Mordeaux than at Valmar. There would be much less need for your skills.”
“The people here might appreciate my skills more than the people of Valmar do. And it would be a chance for me to start fresh. The other advantage is the area appears richer in terms of herbs and plants. Less of the forest and brush has been cleared away. And there’s something about Mordeaux that appeals to me.”
“What about everyone at Valmar? How would we manage without your healing skills?”
“’Tis not so far away. You could send someone to fetch me when I’m truly needed. I would make certain you had a good supply of herbs at the castle, and come every fortnight or so to replenish it. While I was there I could see to ailments and problems that need ongoing care. You know how to treat the simple things. I’m certain if you looked around, you could find a suitable young woman to train to help you.”
“What about Reynard? He’s Fawkes’s captain, not to mention his closest friend and companion.”
“What about Reynard?”
Nicola gazed at the wise woman in surprise. “I thought you cared for him.”
“I do. I’m simply not willing to plan my life around a man. If he wants to share my bed, I’m more than willing. But I’ll not be his wife. I’ve never sought a husband. My mother taught me to avoid such entanglements. They inevitably interfere with the responsibilities of being a healer.”
Poor Reynard. He was clearly besotted with Glennyth. He would not take this news well. Unless… A sudden thought came to Nicola. What if Fawkes made Reynard castellan at Mordeaux, and Gilbert and his family came to live at Valmar? Would Gilbert be content to have fewer responsibilities and considerably less power?
Of course, Valmar was a much larger castle. There was a lot to do and many more things to look after. She’d already sensed Fawkes chafed at some of the responsibilities of his position. He was skilled in warfare and defense, but not at seeing to the day-to-day details of the demesne. And Warin was getting old. They would need a new steward eventually. Someone who could help her account for supplies and foodstores.
Gilbert took care of those tasks at Mordeaux, in addition to seeing to the area’s defense. Although she was not certain how well he could read and write, she knew Gilbert was good at tallying and keeping track of quantities of goods. Her excitement grew. Mayhaps this was a way to help Simon adjust to his new circumstances, as well as giving Glennyth a fresh start.
“It looks so peaceful,” Glennyth said as the castle came in view. “Difficult to believe all the turmoil that took place here in the past sennight.”
“There’s still evidence of FitzRandolph’s army.” Nicola motioned to the muddy meadow where the hoof prints of dozens of horses, and the ruts made by the wheels of the supply carts crisscrossed the trampled grass.
“That’s not what I was speaking of,” Glennyth said. “I was thinking of the day when FitzSaer took Hilary and me and the children prisoner. When I was in the cellar at Rosebrook, I truly thought I would die there. I’m very glad FitzSaer is now enduring similar circumstances.”
Nicola shuddered. “I won’t feel safe until I know he no longer walks upon this earth.”
“Don’t think about that,” Glennyth said. “Think about the fact that you’re finally able to acknowledge Simon as your son.”
“You’re right. ’Tis a happy day, indeed.” Nicola turned her gaze to the castle. “And now that I’ve thought of a plan to make mov
ing him to Valmar less upsetting for all concerned, I can truly enjoy this moment.”
“What plan is that?”
Nicola met her friend’s gaze. “A number of things have to fall into place, but I think you will be pleased with my idea.”
****
Nicola had been in the solar for some time. After hugging Simon and Joanie and giving them honeycakes from Agelwulf, she’d sat beside Hilary and set to work on the sewing she’d brought—a tunic for Fawkes. Hilary worked on a gown for Joanie. As they sewed, she caught up Hilary on the events of the past few days: Fawkes’s recovery, FitzRandolph’s arrival with his army at Valmar and Alys’s plot with FitzSaer.
Hilary listened thoughtfully, occasionally nodding or making a comment. When Nicola told her that Fawkes knew Simon was his son and wanted to see him, Hilary put her sewing aside and turned to look at Nicola, her blue eyes troubled. “I knew this day would come, and Simon would eventually to go off to live with you. Even so…” She glanced toward the corner of the solar where Simon and her daughter were playing. “’Twill be very hard to say goodbye to him. Poor Joanie will be heartbroken.”
“I’ve thought that myself. And I think I have a solution. What would you think of coming to live at Valmar—you, Gilbert and Joanie?”
A slight frown creased Hilary’s freckled brow. “We’re happy here, and now that FitzSaer will no longer trouble us, I’d hoped things would return to the way they had been. Gilbert is well liked and respected here. If he went to Valmar, he would be one of many knights in the garrison.”
“Not necessarily. The steward at Valmar is getting old. I think he would be relieved to give up some of his responsibilities to another man. Gilbert would do well in such a position. He does a fine job of tallying castle supplies and recording produce from the villeins here at Mordeaux.”
“’Tis true that Gilbert has more interest in things like that than warfare. I have often thought it a pity that the only way men of ambition and drive can improve their lot is to become skilled at injuring and killing other men, or at least being in charge of men who do such things.” She motioned to Simon. “’Tis very hard to imagine little Simon as a knight. But I suppose that is his destiny.”
“I’m afraid it must be. Although, like you, ’tis not my preference. There is always the Church. But I’m not certain I want him to be part of that world either. Then he would never know the companionship and pleasures of marriage.”
Hilary smiled. “Much has changed over the summer. At one time you were wary and suspicious of Fawkes, and very discouraged about your future with him. Now you appear content, even happy. I’m pleased to see it.”
“I am happy. Fawkes is not like most men. At least the ones I’ve known. He seems to respect and admire me. The thought of it quite amazes me.”
“Once you have your beloved Simon with you, I’m certain your contentment will only increase.”
“And yet, I don’t want to disrupt his life and tear him away from the people he loves. Which is why I hope you will consider my idea.”
“I will, of course,” Hilary answered. “But one question I have is, if Gilbert leaves, who would be in charge of Mordeaux?”
“I have a plan for that as well. Glennyth the healer desires to live at Mordeaux instead of Valmar. And seeing as Fawkes’s captain is in love with her, he would seem a natural fit for the position of castellan.”
“You are clever, milady. I have always thought so.”
Clever. Perhaps she was. Although it had nearly been her undoing. “So, you will talk to Gilbert about this? Or do you wish for me to do so?”
“Better that it should come from you, I think.”
“But I don’t want him to be unhappy. If he objects to my plan, you will tell me, won’t you?”
“I will tell you.”
Nicola got up. “I should go and speak to Gilbert. I will do that while you get Simon’s things ready.”
Hilary also stood. “What will he need? You don’t want me to send all his things yet, do you?”
“Not yet. Pack only enough for a visit of few days. I will either return with him then, or fetch the rest of his possessions, depending on whether I can convince Fawkes of my plan.”
“He does not know of it?” Hilary gazed at her in astonishment.
“Not yet.” Would Fawkes see her idea as a means of trying to manipulate him? Would he understand how important it was to Simon to have Hilary and Joanie nearby?
She found Gilbert in the hall going through the tally sticks. Perfect, she thought. He started to rise. She waved him down and sat on the bench across from him. “I have a proposition for you, Gilbert. I don’t know yet if Fawkes will agree, but this is my plan.” She told him about taking Simon to live at Valmar and her plan to move Gilbert and his family there as well. “What do you think of the idea?”
“’Tis not my place to say. When Fawkes defeated Mortimer, I swore to him as the new lord. He can assign me duties as he sees fit.”
“Even so, I want you and Hilary to be happy and content. I’m certain you have concerns. Valmar is a much bigger castle and you will not have nearly the authority there you have here.”
“Nor near the responsibilities,” Gilbert said. “After what I went through with FitzSaer and FitzRandolph, I would rather not be in charge of a castle’s defense, at least not on my own. On the other hand, I truly don’t know that much about what a steward does.”
“Perhaps we should have you come and speak to Warin and learn more about his usual tasks. We can tell Fawkes that you are keen to improve the record keeping at Mordeaux and that’s why you are shadowing Warin.”
“Why must we give Fawkes an explanation for my presence at Valmar? Doesn’t he know about this plan to move me and my family there?” Gilbert looked alarmed. Nicola reminded herself that most men didn’t think it was a woman’s place to be involved in such decisions. Most wives deferred to their husbands in important matters. Indeed, that was exactly what Hilary had done.
“I haven’t spoken to Fawkes about this yet. But once he realizes how important this is to Simon, I’m certain he’ll agree.”
“Simon? What’s his part in this?”
“I can’t bear to separate him from Joanie. He’s grown up with her and is as close to her as he would be with a true sibling.”
The always-serious Gilbert gave her a glimmer of a smile. “In fact, they are closer than most siblings. They rarely fight or squabble over anything. Although that’s probably because Simon is younger, and very sweet-tempered.”
“So, you understand my reason for asking you to do this?”
“I do. The question is, will Fawkes? While my moving to Valmar will solve the problem of your aging steward, it will create some difficulty here. There are a couple of knights I could recommend, in terms of seeing to the castle’s defense. But I doubt Fawkes knows either of them. He may not be comfortable with appointing an unknown man as castellan.”
“In fact, the man who will replace you is very well-known to Fawkes. It’s Reynard, Fawkes’s captain.”
“’Tis clearly an opportunity for him. Although he did not strike me as a man who likes to be in charge. I thought him the carefree sort, someone who is happy to take orders and be spared the hard decisions.”
“There is much of that in Reynard. But recent events have forced him to take charge of things and he’s not such an easygoing fellow these days. Besides, if his beloved Glennyth decides to live here, I think he will be pleased to take the position. He would do near anything to make her happy. Fawkes owes Glennyth a boon for saving his life. If she chooses to live at Mordeaux and Fawkes’s captain chooses to follow her, Fawkes can hardly say no.”
Gilbert still appeared wary. Not only of her plan, but of Nicola herself. She suspected he was very thankful that gentle, accommodating Hilary was his wife, rather than her. Would Fawkes eventually tire of her forthright nature and wish he had a meeker, more biddable wife? But how was she to change now, when she knew that without her bold acti
ons, both Fawkes and Simon would likely be dead or lost to her forever?
“I need to find Glennyth and gather up Simon’s things and then we will leave,” she told Gilbert. “I assume you would prefer to ride, so you can return to Mordeaux whenever you wish.”
“Aye, milady. I will arrange for someone to be in charge in my absence, then get my mount and meet you in the bailey.”
Nicola returned to Gilbert and Hilary’s living quarters to get Simon. He was still playing with Joanie. When he saw her, he got up from the floor and regarded her with a pensive expression. “Can Joanie come?”
“Next time she will, I promise. Now, do you have everything you want to take—your favorite toys?”
He nodded, his expression solemn.
She held out her arms to him. “Will you come then?” He hesitated, his lower lip trembling. Nicola felt her own throat close up. She had not thought this would be so difficult for him. “What’s wrong, sweetling?”
Hilary drew near. “’Tis all right, Simon. You know Lady Nicola loves you as much as I do. She will take good care of you. And there are all sorts of fun things you can do at Valmar, aren’t there, lady?”
“Aye. All kinds of fun things. You can explore the castle and ride on a horse with your fath—Lord Fawkes. Get treats from the kitchen.” Nicola wracked her brain, trying think of things Simon might enjoy doing.
“Do you have doggies and kitties there?” Simon asked.
“We have both. Glennyth, who you will meet soon, she has a big golden kitty named Tom. And there is another cat that lives at the castle named Gimlyn. And in the stables there are hunting hounds.”
“I want Willow.” Simon’s voice hovered on the edge of sob.
“I’m afraid there isn’t room in the cart for a dog,” Nicola soothed. “But next time you come to Valmar, you can bring him, I promise.”
Simon thought this over. He went over to where Joanie was working on her sewing. The little girl’s freckled face was screwed up in concentration as she sought to make her stitches even and neat. “Joanie, you must take care of Willow,” Simon said. “Give him food at dinner. I don’t want him to go hungry.”
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