by Gail Oust
Praise for the Novels of Gail Oust
’Til Dice Do Us Part
“A well-written, entertaining mystery with a delightful heroine who has a very wry sense of humor, but a fierce sense of friendship and loyalty.”
—The Mystery Reader
“An entertaining amateur sleuth as the Bunco Babes reject the notion of tossing dice during visiting hours to the state pen. Fans will enjoy the camaraderie of the BFFs as they Whack ’n’ Roll their way through their investigation with humor, concern, and catching optimism. Gail Oust rolls an eleven with this enjoyable winner.”
—The Best Reviews
“Author Gail Oust gives readers a look into a group of feisty, lively retirees with a passion for bunco and for mystery-solving as well.”
—Fresh Fiction
“Time will fly as you quickly devour Gail Oust’s ’Til Dice Do Us Part, laughing out loud as Kate and the other Babes socialize.”
—TwoLips Reviews
Whack ’n’ Roll
“Feisty and intelligent, Kate is an admirable protagonist with genuinely clever detective skills. Far superior to the typical cozy, this uniquely capricious mystery will engage readers from the very first page to the surprising conclusion.”
—Publishers Weekly (starred review)
“A delightful amateur sleuth…the Bunco Babes are a close-knit group who have each other’s back like the Musketeers, so Kate has a powerful geriatric support group. The spunky Kate and her BFFs are filled with so much energy that people half their age will admire them. Gail Oust provides a complex whodunit starring a cast of eccentric sexagenarians.”
—The Best Reviews
“An engaging heroine…well plotted…a fine start to a series featuring some very enjoyable Southern sixty-somethings.”
—The Mystery Reader
OTHER BUNCO BABES MYSTERIES BY GAIL OUST
Whack ’n’ Roll
’Til Dice Do Us Part
Shake, Murder, and Roll
A Bunco Babes Mystery
Gail Oust
OBSIDIAN
Published by New American Library, a division of Penguin Group (USA) Inc., 375 Hudson Street, New York, New York 10014, USA
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First published by Obsidian, an imprint of New American Library, a division of Penguin Group (USA) Inc.
Copyright © Gail Oust, 2011
All rights reserved
ISBN: 9781101519349
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To Greg, my warrior son.
The universe rewards courage.
Acknowledgments
Thanks to the elite of the McCormick Garden Club for your help making my plot blossom and grow. Special mention goes to Carol Mavity, a dear friend, who faithfully rides to my rescue whether with answers to dumb questions, a coffee cake, or an unscheduled trip to the dump. Joyce Isaacson, it’s been a pleasure to discover a devious mind lurking beneath your kind heart. Mary Ann Beyer, you’re a true gem. Your attention to detail makes me envious. I’m grateful you’re a pack rat. Jean Randall and her assistants (Bet, Barb, Janet, and Pat) at the Friends of the McCormick County Library, have I told you how much I appreciate your efforts on my behalf? You host the best book signings ever! Sandy Mahoney, RN and First Responder, your experience added verisimilitude. As always, to Bob, husband and friend, for being my sidekick through thick ’n’ thin. I can’t write a book about yards and gardens without thanking our personal Shrub Patrol. Stouffer’s, Montgomery’s, Beyer’s, and Byron, you made our house look like a home again.
And last but by no means least, my heartfelt thanks to my superlative agent, Jessica Faust of BookEnds, LLC, and my wonderful editor at New American Library, Sandy Harding, for your unstinting patience, support, and caring. Sometimes words just aren’t enough.
Contents
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Chapter 32
Chapter 33
Chapter 34
Chapter 35
Chapter 36
Chapter 37
Chapter 1
“Honestly, Kate, I don’t know why I let you talk me into this.”
A little cheese to go along with the whine? Cheddar or Gouda? I wanted to ask, but I bit my tongue instead.
Monica, bless her heart, could be such a whiner. If anyone was entitled to whine, it should be me, Kate McCall. Along with the rest of the Bunco Babes, I’d voted to forgo our bimonthly bunco game in favor of a lecture on, of all things, gardening. Gardening! Imagine me and gardening. The two go together like John Dillinger and the FBI. Friends from Serenity Cove Estates to Toledo know my thumb isn’t green. It’s brown, brown, brown!
“Y’all, isn’t this excitin’?” Connie Sue Brody fairly bubbled with enthusiasm. Connie Sue is our resident beauty queen and a former cheerleader. And once a cheerleader, always a cheerleader. “Just think, a real celebrity right here in Serenity Cove Estates!”
“I even went to the mall and bought a new o
utfit—in case there were photographers present,” Polly, our group’s septuagenarian piped. “I hear bright colors show up best.”
Bright? More like neon, I thought eyeing Polly’s pink and lime-green ensemble. But who said one needs to act one’s age? Sometimes it’s a heckuva lot more fun to kick up your heels and be a youngster again. In a retirement community for “active” adults such as Serenity Cove Estates, age is relative. Here a youngster is anyone ineligible for Medicare. Sixty is the new forty.
Gloria Meyers, Polly’s long-suffering daughter, glanced at her watch. “It’s almost time. Shouldn’t they be opening the doors soon? It’ll take a while for this many people to settle.”
Tonight’s crowd congregated to witness a mind-boggling PowerPoint presentation on drought-resistant perennials—I’m being facetious about the mind-boggling—were scrunched together like sardines in the hallway outside the auditorium of the rec center. Those who showed no desire to be sardines milled aimlessly about the lobby, waiting for Marietta Perkins, the assistant manager, to fling open the auditorium doors and admit the masses.
“I hope this isn’t going to be a waste of time,” Monica fussed. “You know how I hate to miss bunco.”
“Hush, sugar. It won’t hurt just this once. Isn’t that right, Kate?” Connie Sue turned to me for validation.
I crossed my fingers behind my back. “Absolutely,” I lied.
Wild horses couldn’t drag it out of me, but secretly I agreed with Monica. I’d much rather be rolling the bones than listening to a botanist—even a glitzy, semi-celebrity cable TV botanist—expound on plants that didn’t have the sense to wither when the thermometer read ninety-five in the shade. Yawn, yawn, and triple yawn.
Any of the Babes would gladly cut off their right arms, cheerfully surrender a kidney, or happily donate a gallon of blood, but if you ask us to give up bunco expect to hear some grumbling. Bunco, for the uninitiated, is a silly, mindless dice game. No skill, no strategy required. Just shake, rattle, and toss. Strictly social. We munch; we imbibe; but most important, we laugh. Bunco is our therapy.
Pam Warner, my BFF, hopped aboard my train of thought. “Bunco wouldn’t have been as much fun tonight anyway. For one reason or another, half the group couldn’t make it. For Rita’s sake let’s make the best of the situation.”
“Pam’s right,” I concurred. “Isn’t that what girlfriends are for, to support one another?”
“Y’all, this is quite a coup for Rita.” Connie Sue fluffed her always perfect honey-blond locks. “What better way to end her term as president of Flowers and Bowers, Serenity Cove’s very own garden club? Imagine her college roommate, none other than Dr. Sheila Rappaport.”
“I never miss How Does Your Garden Grow?” Gloria confessed.
“I’d watch, too,” Polly said, “but it comes on at the same time as The Young and the Restless. Y and R’s got some hot new dudes.”
Knowing it would only irritate Gloria, I tried not to smile. Out of the corner of my eye, I caught Pam hiding a grin behind her program.
“Did y’all know you should cut back lantanas in February and cover ’em with mulch?” Connie Sue asked, taking out her compact and inspecting her makeup. “You can learn a lot from watchin’ Dr. Sheila.”
Maybe I’d develop a better knack for growing things if I stopped watching Law & Order reruns and switched to HGTV. Merely thinking of such a sacrifice made me want to weep. Law & Order and CSI helped mold me into the woman I am today. A woman versed in the crime-solving trinity of motive, means, and opportunity. A woman who can rattle off acronyms like a reformed alcoholic does the twelve steps. Acronyms like DOA, COD, and GSR. I know TOD isn’t a man’s name but time of death. And I’m well aware CODIS and AFIS aren’t the names of a movie star’s twins.
“Oh, look, there she is—Dr. Sheila.” Gloria Myers pointed toward a striking couple standing somewhat apart from the rest of those assembled. The movement caused her many bracelets to jangle. What Gloria lacks in a trendsetter wardrobe, she makes up for with jewelry. She sparkles and shines. She glows. Bling is her thing.
“She’s even better-lookin’ in person than on TV,” Connie Sue remarked after scrutinizing the woman. What better judge of beauty than our very own former Miss Peach Princess?
I half-turned to study the subject under discussion. Sheila Rappaport was perhaps five foot seven, slender as a reed, her body tight and toned beneath a silk wrap dress. Her blond hair, sporting both highlights and lowlights, was cut in an asymmetrical style, leaving the right side to swing free and follow the curve of her jaw. I had to agree she looked…smokin’. At least I think that’s the current term for hot enough to steam bifocals.
“And isn’t that…?” Monica whispered.
“Dr. Vaughn Bascomb,” Pam supplied. “I recognize him from his guest appearances on Dr. Sheila’s show.”
Vaughn Bascomb, I’d learned from Rita, was Sheila Rappaport’s significant other. They’d been an item for nearly five years but never married. They say opposites attract and, in this instance, it appeared true. While Sheila exuded glitz and glamour, her partner was pleasantly plain and rumpled. Bascomb was slight of build with slouching shoulders and when it came to hairlines, well, let’s just say the tide had definitely left the shore. Yet there was something oddly appealing about the man. I couldn’t quite put my finger on whether it was his slightly perplexed expression or his scholarly persona. I wondered why botany was his chosen field. At first glance, the man seemed more suited for a classroom than digging in the dirt.
“Here you are,” Rita Larsen’s voice boomed from behind us. Intent on putting the team of Rappaport and Bascomb under the microscope, we hadn’t noticed her approach. No mean accomplishment considering Rita’s nearly six feet tall and built like a running back for the Carolina Panthers. “Thanks for coming tonight. It means a lot to me.”
“We wouldn’t have missed it for the world,” Monica gushed.
I narrowed my eyes and studied Monica. I may suffer “senior” moments now and again, those annoying little lapses of memory that plague the golden years, but I swore only minutes ago Monica was bellyaching about having to miss bunco. Yet here she was, oozing “nice” like an Oklahoma oil well. I wanted to ask, Who are you and what have you done with the real Monica Pulaski?
Polly didn’t waste time satisfying her curiosity. “Were you and Sheila really college roommates?”
I caught Gloria giving her mother a cautionary elbow in the ribs. Knowing Polly, however, she might well have saved herself the effort.
Polly continued unfazed. “Seeing the two of you together, no one would guess you’re the same age.”
An awkward silence fell over our little band of bunco players. No one likes to hear they’re growing old—especially not from a friend.
“What Mother meant was…” Gloria began.
Rita waved aside the apology. “I know what you meant, Polly, and I happen to agree. Sheila looks…fabulous.”
Did I detect a note of envy in Rita’s voice? If so, I could hardly blame her. Sheila Rappaport could easily have passed for forty.
Connie Sue leaned closer and lowered her voice. “Sneak into her bedroom, sugar. Find out what kind of beauty products she’s usin’.”
Rita feigned outrage, pressing a hand against her impressive set of 40 DDs. “Connie Sue Brody, are you asking me to spy on a friend?”
“You’re darn tootin’, sugar.” Connie Sue grinned, unabashed. “If that fails, find out the name of the surgeon who did her work. And while you’re at it, see if she’s got his card.”
“Let me introduce all of you before the doors open.” Raising her hand, Rita beckoned to the guest of honor, who was now circulating through the crowd.
Sheila spotted Rita instantly—not that spotting Rita took special skill. Arm in arm with her significant other, Vaughn Bascomb, the esteemed botanist made her way toward us, doling out charm and glamour along the way like Halloween candy.
“Sheila, Vaughn, I’d like you to
meet my best friends,” Rita said, and then proceeded with the introductions.
If Sheila Rappaport was attractive from a distance, she was even more so up close and personal. I found myself marveling at her flawless complexion. Even at sixty-something, it appeared smooth and nearly wrinkle-free, giving her an ageless look. Now I ask you, why do some faces get wrinkly and saggy and others don’t? Why do some waistlines stay trim while others get thick and lumpy? Two of life’s greatest mysteries. Some things just aren’t fair.
Introductions over, Sheila laid a hand on Rita’s forearm. “Rita would you be a dear, and find me some ginger ale? My stomach’s a bit queasy.”
“Sure thing,” Rita told her. “Wait here. I’ll be right back.”
“Rita, if you don’t mind, would you bring one for me as well?” Vaughn asked tentatively, then turned to us, his tone apologetic. “Ever since lunch, I’ve been feeling a little under the weather. Must’ve been something I ate.”
Chapter 2
“It’s all that fried food,” Sheila stated unequivocally. “No wonder this region of the country is considered the Stroke Belt.”
We shuffled out feet and looked elsewhere. None of us, it seemed, knew quite how to respond to this allegation, including Polly, who for once kept her comments to herself.
Finally Monica cleared her throat. “Actually, many possible causes for the high stroke rate have been investigated, but the reasons still haven’t been determined.”
For once, and perhaps the only time, I greeted Monica’s love of quoting recent studies with enthusiasm. You go, girl, I silently applauded.
But Monica didn’t need my applause, she was just warming up. “There are many hypotheses. However…”
