“I need to ask you something, and I want you to tell me the truth.” His voice cracked on the word truth.
“Okay.”
“Were you…? Did I just…?” He ran his fingers through his hair, and then tucked the towel tighter around his waist.
Kenley didn’t say anything. Technically he hadn’t asked anything yet. She allowed him to stammer.
“I mean it felt … and then the blood … and you looked like I hurt you, but that can’t be.” He met her eyes for the first time. “Can it?”
That was a question. The question.
“If you’re asking if I lost my virginity tonight with you, then yes.” She bit her bottom lip. “I did.”
“Why didn’t you say something?” He clenched his hair with his hands, his voice turning accusatory.
“What does it matter? Isn’t this something you can brag about with your friends?”
“No!” he said with wide eyes. “It’s something very important. Something you wait to do with someone special. Why me?”
“I’m twenty-eight. I was done waiting. I was willing to settle for someone who wasn’t a dick.” She sighed. It wouldn’t help to get angry at him. “Besides, it was special. At least I thought so.”
His eyes weren’t any less frantic, and he didn’t speak.
“It’s not like I expect anything serious between us. I wanted my first time to be with a nice guy, and you’re a nice guy.” She shrugged, going for nonchalance.
“You could have said something.” He seemed more upset about the secrecy than the deflowering. What a silly word. There was nothing flowery about it.
“You would have freaked out and not wanted to do it.”
“Probably.” He paced in the small space, ducking so his head wouldn’t hit the ceiling. “Why me, Kenley? This is a lot of pressure.”
“It’s not any pressure. We can go back to work like friends.”
“Shit! You work for me!” He held his hands up to the ceiling as if he just remembered this fact. The pacing became more like laps.
Kenley got out of bed and stepped toward him. She was still naked, and it hurt when his eyes darted away from her body like he was committing a sin by looking at her.
“I know I’m new at this part, but I guess sometimes the guy wants the girl to leave right away. Should I go? Would that be easier?”
“No,” he said quickly. “I don’t want you to leave. God, I’m not going to send you packing after I just…” He gestured toward her body, but still wouldn’t look at her.
“Maybe I should go.” She decided to make the choice for him. He was freaking out. She didn’t want him to invite her to stay out of obligation.
She pulled on her clothes haphazardly while he stood there staring at the floor.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered as she left the room. She kept going. Only when she was at the end of the dock did she stop. Her hands were shaking so badly she dropped one of her shoes on her bare toe as she fumbled to get it on. The fact that she could barely see through her tears didn’t help matters.
She wiped the tears away before entering the hotel. Keeping her head down, she rode up to her room on the elevator. After fumbling with the stupid card for what felt like forever, she finally got inside her room.
Once inside, she dropped her purse on the table by the door and slid to the floor, letting the tears flow.
It wasn’t about losing her virginity. By this point, she couldn’t have cared less about how special and magical it was supposed to be. She didn’t see it as a precious gift to be given to a deserving soul who would prove himself worthy by beheading dragons and saving the realm. It was just a thing, like getting her ears pierced, or her first hangover.
The thing that hurt was what she’d messed up with Zane. She knew him well enough to know how he would handle this. He would ignore her and keep her at a distance so he wouldn’t have to deal with it. She cursed herself for not driving. Having to go back home in his boat—the boat where they’d been happy for a few moments—would be torture.
She wasn’t sorry she’d picked him. He had been wonderful. If it had been a precious gift, then she was glad she’d given it to him. But now what?
A firm tap on the door behind her interrupted her from her sob fest. She quieted and froze, a defense mechanism usually employed by rabbits when being hunted by a fox. But she wasn’t a rabbit, so it was no surprise when this method didn’t work.
The fox knocked again.
“Kenley, please open the door. I’m not leaving.”
With an exasperated sigh, she stood. For a second she contemplated her appearance—shirt buttoned up crookedly, jeans unzipped, hair mussed, makeup smeared by tears.
What did it matter?
She opened the door and watched his shoulders slump and his face fall in agony.
“Before you even think I’m crying because of what happened, I’m not. I’m glad it happened. Happy even.”
“Yes, you look so happy.”
“I am. I’m just upset about messing things up between us.”
“I’m worried about that too. I didn’t handle it right. I didn’t want you to leave.”
“Well, I did. I’m here now.” She pointed to the very rosy room behind her.
“Right, but it’s not that far. You could come back if you wanted.” He pointed down with a small smile. “Do you want to?”
“Do you want me to?”
He let his head hang forward and then shook it slowly. “We’re not good at this,” he said.
“No. I guess not.” She frowned and looked at his bare feet. How could a guy have sexy feet? It wasn’t fair. Everything about him was sexy. From his muscled arms and shoulders to his bare chest and ripped abs. She had no idea all this was lurking under that scruffy flannel and faded T-shirt.
He put his finger under her chin and nudged her face up so he could look into her eyes.
“Just because we’re not good at this, doesn’t mean it’s not worth trying to work it out.”
A small smile threatened to break across her face. He leaned down and kissed her. Everything she’d felt before came crashing back over her. She hadn’t realized she would want him so much, so soon, but she did. It was as if she had an on switch and he’d flipped it.
She deepened the kiss and pulled him toward her bed. He followed along willingly.
Slipping her hand under the waistband of his jeans made him moan. The power in that caused her body shake. His fingers fumbled, but he got her shirt open. She hadn’t put on her bra in her rush to get away.
How strange—she didn’t want to be away from him now. She never would have thought of herself as a flighty person, but this man made her crazy.
She kicked off her jeans at the same time he pulled off his pants. Then he froze.
“Hell. I only had the one condom,” he said with a tortured expression.
“It’s okay, I’m on birth control. To regulate my cycle.” She was happy to finally get the chance to use it for its intended purpose. He murmured something that sounded like praise to God as she fell back on the bed. He moved between her legs and slid inside her in one movement.
It went a lot better this time. The tenderness was mild, there was no stinging, as she’d experienced the first time. And the pleasure made it worth it.
“Oh God,” he whispered as he began moving slowly. She smiled up at him and he smiled back.
“It’s okay?” he asked.
“Better than okay,” she answered. “You can go faster.”
“No, I can’t. If I do, it will be over way too soon.”
“Oh.” She smiled wider, knowing it felt too good for him to control himself. She loved that.
“Really?” He chuckled as he noticed. “Now, I’m going to have to wipe that smug little smile off your face.” He pulled out, causing her to groan from his absence.
“No. Please. I won’t smile. Just come back.” It was too late. He wasn’t coming back. He was kissing her neck and moving down. Someh
ow he was able to play with one of her nipples with his fingers while sucking the other one into his mouth. She had to love a man who could multitask.
She couldn’t keep her body still, it seemed to writhe and arch on the bed without her permission. A whimper escaped when he released her breasts. The moisture he left on her flesh chilled quickly in the cool room, but the rest of her was flaming hot.
She assumed he would move back into position, but instead he was kissing down her stomach. When he dipped his tongue into her belly button she jolted, knowing where he was heading.
“You don’t have to—”
“Shut up,” he said. She could feel his laughter on her inner thigh as he spread her legs.
“But I’m not sure—”
“Don’t worry. I’m sure.” He winked at her from his spot between her legs, and then before she could offer another protest his tongue swept up through her wetness and she involuntarily screamed and pulled away.
It felt too good. She wasn’t prepared.
Zane laughed again, this time his breath spread over her center, causing yet another jolt.
“Watch me, Kenley,” he said, and she realized her eyes were squeezed shut in anticipation. She opened them and looked down as he stroked her with his tongue again.
Her head fell to the side and her fingers clenched the sheets.
The tension she’d felt before was back. She knew wave after wave of pleasure was headed her way. She was so close.
Zane slid one finger inside her, stroking her internally while his tongue lapped at her again and again.
Somehow her hands had moved to his hair, and she was pulling him closer as she screamed out his name. The tremors began, and she knew she screamed again, but had no idea what she might have said.
She hardly had a moment to catch her breath before he was moving inside her again. Apparently she was going to catch up on all the years of sex she’d missed in just one night.
“Zane,” she said breathlessly.
“Yes, sweetheart?” Oh. God. He’d called her sweetheart.
“Is it rude if I have more orgasms than you?” she panted while he laughed, the sensation of his laughter while he was inside her made her gasp with pleasure.
“Take as many as you can get.” He kissed her lips, her cheek, her jaw and her neck.
It didn’t take her long to test him on his generous offer.
Certainly she was being selfish. She should do something for him. She’d serviced a man before—she knew how—and while she hadn’t really enjoyed it before, she thought that might be different now. With Zane. “Let me…” She wiggled again, but Zane kept her firmly in place under him.
“Stay still and come for me again, Kenley.” At his words, she gave in. She pressed up off the bed, meeting each trust eagerly until her legs could no longer support her, and she slid back down to the mattress.
Zane’s pace sped up and with a loud groan he pushed into her as far as he could before he collapsed. The heat he released into her like pulses of fire.
Her breathing was so loud. It might have been embarrassing except that Zane was just as out of breath.
“I can’t believe I waited so long. Had I known it would be so great…” She shook her head, and he laughed.
“I’ve created a monster,” he said, propping himself up so he was looking at her. She didn’t shy away from his gaze. Instead she looked back at him, feeling invincible and happy.
“Is it always like this?” she asked. No way could everyone have sex like that. No one would ever want to do anything else. Nothing would ever get done.
He chuckled and shook his head. He didn’t elaborate, and she didn’t push for details. Being with him was enough.
“I still can’t figure out how you made it this long without having sex. Every guy you dated had to be all over you,” he said.
“I didn’t really date much in high school. And in college they would drink too much and forget they didn’t have sex with me, or worse; think they did.” She frowned. “When I got out of school I was determined to find Mr. Right. But it wasn’t easy finding someone who was the complete package. Especially when my list was extremely unrealistic. And then I started working right out of college, and was too busy to date. When I did, it was just one or two times at the most.
“I can’t tell you how many times I almost went for it on the first date, just to get it over with. But I couldn’t. I knew special was overrated, but I still didn’t want to have regrets.”
“And do you have any?” he asked as he brushed his fingers through her hair.
“No. Not one.”
He leaned over and kissed her softly.
“We should get some sleep.” He pulled her against him and put his face in her hair. Kissing her neck, he mumbled a goodnight and they drifted off together.
Hands down, it was the most amazing night of her life. Maybe special wasn’t so overrated after all.
* * *
Zane woke before Kenley. She was curled up next to him, her long blond hair covering her face. Slowly, so as not to wake her, he moved the strands so he could look at her.
She looked like an angel, or a sleeping princess, or any of those things only guys who were whipped would think when they looked at a woman. Except this was different.
What would she want from him? What would he be willing to give? As he watched her sleep, anxiety crept in.
How long before she moved on to someone else, leaving him in shambles? Worse, he’d just opened her up to a whole new world. Surely she would want to explore it fully.
He’d nearly thought himself into a panic when his phone rang. It was on the floor in his pants, but he could hear it blaring his sister’s ring tone. Hearing the theme song that accompanied Darth Vader’s entrance made him cringe instinctually.
He snuggled in closer to Kenley as she shifted from the disruption. A call from the President of the United States wouldn’t get him out of that bed. Not while he was sharing it with the most amazing woman he’d ever known.
But Sidney called again. By the third time, Kenley stirred and looked up. A happy smile crossed her face when she saw him.
“What is that?” she asked as the phone rang again.
“My sister is calling me. Just ignore it.”
“Your sister who is having a baby any day?” she reminded him with wide eyes.
“Oh shit!” He jumped out of bed and tossed their clothes around until he found his phone. “Yes? I’m here!”
“It’s about time. I’m about ready to burst here, and you can’t pick up your goddamned phone?”
“Shit! I’m sorry. I was—” Well, he couldn’t finish that sentence with the truth. “Not with my phone.”
“Dr. Daddy says it’s time. We’re heading to the hospital.”
“But it’s not time.” Her due date wasn’t for another week.
“Try telling that to your niece. Don’t worry. I’m close enough.”
“Okay. I’m on my way. I’m out of town.”
“You’ll have plenty of time before Mom and Dad get here from Florida. You have to get here before them, Zane. I can’t handle them and have a new life wrenched from my uterus at the same time.”
“Yes. I’ll be there as soon as I can to run interference.”
“Thank you, Uncle Z.” Damn, that got him every time. He got off the phone and turned back to Kenley, who was already dressed and packing.
“We need to go,” she said, having heard the conversation.
“Yeah. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. You’re going to be an uncle. It’s going to be great.” She zipped up her bag and tugged at her T-shirt. “I can contact the dealer and reschedule the showing for Weston’s boat. Are we ready?”
He didn’t know how he’d gotten so lucky that she was not only sexy, but also an amazing employee. Had he won the lottery?
“Thanks.”
She checked out of the hotel while he went to ready the boat. The sun was up, shooting through the sky i
n vibrant pink. He put her bag below. The sheets were rumpled and his stateroom smelled like sex. He couldn’t help but smile at the memories it incited.
He started the boat and helped her in when she got there.
“So are you ready for this?” she asked. For a moment he assumed she meant them. Together. “My niece is six and we spend hours changing her doll’s clothes. Over and over again. It’s super fun. You’re going to love it.” He chuckled at her deadpan tone.
“Yeah. It’s going to be great. I just hope my parents don’t ruin it.” It was nice to have hope, as unrealistic as it was.
“What’s their deal?”
“They fight and make everyone around them miserable because they are miserable. When they moved to Florida two years ago, we thought it would be a break from the misery, but no. They call and complain about one another. They should have gotten divorced when we were kids, but I think they’re both too stubborn to be the one to give up.” He didn’t go into the details of his father’s affair and how it had changed his whole view on family. She wasn’t ready for that.
“Sounds lovely.”
“Oh, yes. And they’re on a plane right now, headed our way.”
“Can’t wait,” she said. Did she plan to go to the hospital with him? He assumed he’d drop her off at her place. Why would she want to spend hours in a hospital waiting room with him? But it would make it so much better if she was there. But why would she stay, especially after he’d just told her the hideousness that was his parents? He smiled over at her again, as she shifted uncomfortably in her seat.
“How do you feel?” he asked.
“A little sore, but okay.” He’d made her sore? A wave of primal delight mixed in with his concern for her well-being.
“And how do feel about what happened with us?” He kept his eyes straight ahead on the water.
“I feel fine.”
“Are you regretting it? Are you sure you weren’t drunk? Did I take advantage of you?” He wanted to make sure he hadn’t set himself up for heartbreak—or an arrest warrant. She laughed at him.
“No. Calm down. It’s all good. I’m good. Stop freaking out.”
“This is a lot of pressure. I’ve never taken someone’s virginity before. I feel like I should present your father with a goat or something.” They laughed together.
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