by Devon Monk
I walked over to Violet. Caught Kevin’s gaze. He sized me up.
Unreadable, that man. He tipped his chin down, just enough, I knew he was giving his okay.
I gently put my hand on Violet’s back. She had both her hands across her stomach now. She was shorter than me, thin, petite. Standing this close to her, touching her, made me realize how small and breakable she was, and I felt an overwhelming desire to protect her, to not let her, or my sibling she was carrying, get hurt.
“I’m sorry,” I said.
She did not look at me. Did not look away from the grave.
“So am I,” she whispered.
“Are you going to be okay?”
She nodded. “It’s going to take some time. More time,” she said faintly.
“If you need me,” I said, “I’ll be here.”
I wanted to say more, wanted to tell her words of comfort, wanted to tell her that I had spoken to him, to his spirit, but it seemed like the worst time ever to bring that up.
“Take care of her.” I said to Kevin. He nodded. I walked back to Zay, and he fell into step with me as we crossed the graveyard.
“Where were you?” I asked. I hadn’t meant for my voice to catch.
“Lobbying for you.”
“With whom?”
“Them.” He pointed in the direction of the people leaving the cemetery.
“Maeve stopped by.”
Zayvion, the graceful, the unflappable Zen master, tripped on smooth ground. “She did?” he asked as he pulled himself back up and dusted his muddy hands.
“That worries you?” I asked.
He took a deep breath, let it out through his mouth in a cloud of steam. “Honestly? Yes. Yes, it does. What did she want?”
“She and I… talked. She mentioned some teaching.”
Zayvion smiled and put his hands in his pockets. I could almost feel the tension draining from his body. “And you said yes, right?”
I shrugged one shoulder.
“Allie.” He sounded worried. “You did say yes, didn’t you?”
“You never asked me if I wanted you to lobby for me, Zayvion. You went out and decided my future for me.”
He stopped. Looked off at the horizon, his breath coming out in steam. It was still raining and he hadn’t removed his knit cap. He looked like he was trying hard to keep it together. Like maybe a lot was riding on this.
“You should have asked me,” I said.
He turned back to me, Zen, calm. Ready to hear my answer. “I see that now. Did you say no to her?” His eyes were brown, but flecks of gold sprayed through them, as if he were trying very hard not to use magic. Or maybe that was what his eyes always did when he was worried.
“No,” I said. “I told Maeve I want to learn. But don’t ever assume you can make decisions for me, Zayvion Jones. Men who do that don’t stay in my life. Period.”
“I’ll remember that.”
We started walking again.
“Thank you, though,” I said.
“Don’t thank me yet,” he said. “It is not an easy thing to learn. It means giving up a lot. A lot of your life. Paying the price.”
Yeah, I got it. Using magic was hard. But if I wanted to survive in this new secret world of magical back-stabbing, corpse-stealing soul suckers, I needed to learn the moves. An image of Pike flashed behind my eyes. Maybe if I had known more about this world, about Zayvion’s world, I could have kept him safe.
“Was it worth it? I asked. “For you?”
“It is now.”
He unlocked the car door and walked around to the driver’s side. I lowered my ducky umbrella and closed it. Then I opened the car door.
The overwhelming scent of summer-roses and irises-wafted out of the car. Zayvion was leaning on the roof, watching me with those warm brown eyes of his.
I bent and looked in. Roses in every shade of pink filled the car. Interspersed with the roses were irises in soft lavender and deep purple. There was even a bouquet of roses buckled into my seat.
Wow. It must have cost him a fortune to get that many flowers in the dead of winter.
“Well, well,” I said as I unbuckled the roses. “What would have happened if I told you I didn’t need a ride?”
He shrugged one shoulder. “I had a good feeling about it.” He got in the driver’s side.
I got in too, maneuvering under the bouquet with one hand as I buckled my seat belt.
“I thought you were going to bring these by my hospital room.”
“It was suggested. That didn’t work out how I wanted it to.” He started the car.
I stuck my nose in the roses and inhaled, long and deep.
Lovely.
“What didn’t work out?” I asked.
“Everything. I should have known something would go wrong when I saw Trager’s blood magic mark on you. I should have gone with you to the police, been there when you confronted Trager.”
“Zayvion, you are not my guard.”
He didn’t say anything.
“You aren’t. You know that, right?”
“Sure.” He didn’t sound very convincing.
“Did Violet hire you to be my guard?”
Nothing.
“Zayvion? Hello? An answer here?”
“Would you like lunch? I think I still owe you that date.”
“Zayvion. Focus. Are you working for Violet?”
“No.”
“So you’re not my bodyguard?”
“Did you want me to be?”
“No.” Yes. No.
It was confusing being me.
“We haven’t even decided if we’re going to date,” I said.
“We can take care of that. Let me take you to lunch.”
I suddenly remembered the card in my pocket. Davy’s invite for me to go to Pike’s last meeting. I glanced at the clock in the dash.
“You have plans?” Zayvion asked.
“No. Yes. Maybe. I have lunch plans. I think.”
“You aren’t sure?”
“It’s Davy Silvers. He’s a-”
“Hound. We met.”
“You did?”
Zayvion looked over at me, frowned. “Ah. Memory loss?” he asked.
“I don’t know. When did you meet him?”
“During the… in the warehouse with Frank Gordon. Do you remember that?”
“Some. Can you tell me about it?”
“Sure. How about over lunch? On our date.”
Was there nothing without a price in this city?
“Fine. Take me to O’Donnel’s.”
Zayvion turned the car in that direction.
We found parking in the lot behind what used to be the old treasury building that had been turned into the pub. We got out of the car. A few patrons were smoking beneath the awning, and we walked past them through the haze of smoke and into the back door of the pub.
The place was small but had two levels. Off in one corner was a player piano. Velvet curtains sectioned off parts of the walls, giving it plenty of private booths. Everything was black walnut, red velvet, and brass.
Classy.
I scanned the room, looking for Davy. The flame of a cigarette being lit caught my eye. Jack, the Whiskey Guy, leaned on a door to an alcove area. He tipped his chin up, turned, and walked into the alcove.
I strode across the room. Maybe more like limped. My feet were numb in my wet boots, and honestly, I’d been doing a lot more standing and walking today than I’d done in the last five. I was feeling pretty worn-out. My stamina was shot. The doctor said I’d feel a little stronger every day. He was an optimistic fellow.
Still, it was a small enough place that I held my own and walked into the alcove area, Zayvion behind me.
The room was filled. Maybe thirty or forty people. Most standing, a few seated at the table. They were grouped by vice, as I suppose made sense. Hard drinkers to the right, street drugs in the back, prescription meds to the left, and smaller pockets of those who used specialize
d pain-avoidance techniques-the cutters, smokers, sex addicts, exercise freaks, and gamblers-sprinkled throughout. Still, no matter what group they belonged to, everyone had a drink in their hands. Platters of food covered the table, and in the center of all that food was a plain black urn.
Oh. For some reason I didn’t realize this would be about Pike’s death. But that urn spoke volumes. I suddenly wanted to leave, wanted to be anywhere but here, face-to-face again with Pike’s death.
Sid, the Hound who looked like he should program computers for a living, appeared from somewhere in the crowd. He was grinning, his eyes half crescents behind his glasses. His cheeks were red. Probably from that glass of tequila in his hand.
“Allie, I’m so glad you came,” he said. “And you’re Zayvion Jones, right?”
“I am.”
“I’m Sid Westerling,” he said. “Davy mentioned you. Welcome.”
Well, that was not at all what I expected out of him. Hounds were notorious loners. Life did not let them make friendships. Life did not bring Hounds together. But apparently death could do both.
“Everyone,” Sid said to the crowd. “Attention for a moment.” He waited for the noise to die down. Someone pressed a glass of red wine in my hands. Zayvion had managed to snag a beer.
“We’re here to recognize and honor the life of a good man and a good Hound: Martin Pike.”
“Pike!” several voices called out.
“May he live on in our memories and hearts. To Pike!”
All glasses raised, and everyone drank.
“And that’s the end of my speech,” he said. “Someone else talk.”
“I’d like to say something.” All eyes turned to a younger voice. Davy Silvers slouched in a chair by the wall. Several people moved out of the way while Davy stood up on the chair. He bobbled his balance just a bit but did not spill the tankard of dark beer in his hand.
Was he even old enough to drink?
“Pike was…” He tipped his head back, closed his eyes. I could seen his Adam’s apple bob as he swallowed back tears. “Not always a good man.”
A few people chuckled.
“But he was what he was. What we are. And he accepted us for all of our faults. ’Cause face it, we’re all a bunch of screwed-up losers.”
More chuckling. Davy looked back down. He wasn’t smiling. “And there was only one of us who was there for him when he needed it the most. Allie Beckstrom.”
Glasses raised, all faces turned to me. I gave a small smile and nodded. See, I’m good under social pressure. Having a notorious father will do that to a girl.
“To Allie,” Davy said.
“Allie!” the crowd agreed.
And then they waited. Waited for me to say something. Okay.
“Pike was my friend.” Wow, this was harder than it looked. “And the last thing he told me before… before he died was: it was worth it.”
Silence fell over the room.
“To Pike,” I said. “The strongest Hound I have had the honor to know. I wish he would have had a chance to find his island away from it all. I’ll miss him. We’ll all miss him.”
“To Pike,” the crowd said somberly.
Everyone drank, and I did too, because my throat was tight with tears.
“Pike would have wanted a new leader for the Pack,” Davy said. “A Hound as tough as he was. A friend. I elect Allie Beckstrom as the new leader of the Pack. All in favor, say aye!”
“Seconded,” Jamar’s baritone called out.
“Third-I mean aye!” That from bouncy, corpse-sniffing Beatrice.
“Wait,” I said. “No. Wait.”
Sid, standing next to me, was laughing.
“I’m not a leader. I shouldn’t be your leader,” I said. “I’ve only ever been to one meeting. I’d make a terrible leader. Vote for Sid, or Jamar or Beatrice.”
No one heard me because everyone was clapping.
Sid, his arms still crossed across his chest, leaned toward me. “Give it up.” His breath smelled of tequilla and lime. “They want you. And we need you. Pike’s death will destroy the ground he worked so hard to gain. You’re not gonna turn your back on your own kind, are you? What would Pike say?”
“I don’t have a kind,” I said.
Sid patted me on the shoulder. “You do now.”
A motion near the back wall of the room caught my eye. The cutter girl, Tomi, Davy’s ex-girlfriend, shouldered her way across the room. She stopped in front of me and looked me straight in the eye.
“Tomi,” Davy called out from across the room.
She didn’t turn, didn’t look at him.
“Yes?” I asked.
She gave me a bored glare.
“Tomi,” he said again, this time a warning. He got down off his chair and pushed his way through the bodies.
I was looking Tomi right in the eye, so I noticed she waited until he was behind her to talk to me. And it was clear from her expression that she didn’t like me much.
“Tomi, leave her alone,” Davy said.
I don’t think he knew what that single sentence did to her. But I did. I watched as her eyes widened. Then she searched my face as if trying to see what he saw in me. Then she licked her lips and scowled.
Great. It didn’t take a genius to interpret the flash of jealousy that screwed her face into a sneer. That woman had hate in her. And lots of it. For me.
“There’s nothing between us,” I said. Neutral. Calm. Maybe some of Zayvion’s Zen was wearing off on me.
“I don’t owe you anything,” she said loud enough for Davy to hear it. “And I will never follow you.”
“Tomi,” Davy said again.
“Fuck you, Davy Silvers. I’ve had better than you. Bigger than you.” She flipped him off and pushed past me. If Zayvion hadn’t been standing hip to hip with me, I think she would have tried to step on my foot as she went by.
About a dozen people, all young enough I’d card them if they tried to buy beer, filtered through the crowd like strings being pulled out of the weave. Each of them, about an even mix between men and women, glared at me and then followed Tomi out into the pub.
I watched Davy’s face slowly slide from confusion to anger.
“Nice job, Silvers,” Sid laughed. “Chasing away members before we even get started again.”
Davy smiled a tight smile. “Their loss.”
Sid swallowed down his drink. “They’ll be back. Give ’em time to cool off. We all need time to cool off.” He angled a look at me and then at Davy, asking me to do something. Then he walked off to find more booze.
Great. I guess I was the guidance counselor now too.
“You know,” I said to Davy, “I recently told someone that I don’t like it when people decide my future without consulting me.”
“Does this mean you’re backing out?” He looked at me with that hollowed shock of betrayal. He looked lost. I knew how he felt. Pike had been my friend too.
“No,” I said. “It means you better enjoy that beer, because I’m going to keep you so busy being my assistant, you’re not going to have time to drink.”
“Huh.” He took a deep swallow of the beer. “I think you underestimate my multitasking abilities.”
“I think you underestimate my ability to work your ass off.”
That got a small smile out of him. “We’ll find out, won’t we?” He hoisted his nearly empty glass. “To tomorrow.”
“To tomorrow.”
We drank on that.
Okay, that was enough red wine before food. My head was feeling a little muzzy. “I think I’m done here,” I mumbled.
Zayvion, who had been quiet, put his hand on my elbow and walked with me out of the room. “Home?” he asked.
“Please,” I said.
Once we got into the car, drenched with the scent of roses, I put the vase of pink flowers on my lap again. I closed my eyes and pressed my fingers over my lids. “How did it get so confusing?” I asked.
“What?”
“My life. Everything used to make sense.”
“Did it?”
“No. But at least it didn’t change every few seconds.”
“Some things are the same,” he said.
“Like what?”
“I still owe you a real date.”
I rolled my head so I could see him. He looked good in profile, a strong nose and high-cut cheekbones that gave him that slightly exotic flare. Wide lips, and dark, smooth skin. The note of his pine cologne mingled with the roses and made a new, sensual scent.
“I thought O’Donnel’s was it,” I said.
He looked over at me. “O’Donnel’s was definitely not it. How about we try it again. Tonight. I’ll come by your place around seven. I have reservations at the Gargoyle.”
That was one of the most expensive French restaurants in town.
“Wow, the Gargoyle? Being a secret magic assassin pays good, don’t it?”
He shrugged one shoulder. “It’s not about the money; it’s about the health benefits.”
I laughed. I mean, seriously guffawed. Sweet hells, it had been a pretty bad few days.
“Or maybe you’d rather have some time alone tonight?” he asked.
I thought about it. He was probably right; I did need time alone. But what I needed even more was to not be alone.
“Seven is great. Bring your wallet; I’m going to be hungry.”
He looked over at me, and those beautiful brown eyes sparked with bits of gold. “I think I can handle that.”
We arrived at my apartment building and he double-parked outside the front door.
“What are we going to do with all these flowers?” I asked.
“Let me take care of it.” He got out of the car, opened the back door, and gathered up all the flowers.
“A little help with the doors would be nice,” he said from somewhere in the middle of the giant bundle of flowers.
I giggled. “You look adorable, Mr. Jones.” I think the wine had done some damage. Or, I don’t know, maybe it was seeing my father’s body buried or my friend in an urn.
“Door, Beckstrom,” Zayvion growled.
“Hold on, hold on.” I jogged up the stairs and opened the front doors.
“Only three flights,” I said to Zayvion.
He grunted.
I walked up the stairs first, Zayvion silent behind me. I paused at the top of the stairs and looked down the hall. It had become a habit. A sort of dread hit my stomach every time I approached the door to my apartment. I couldn’t help but glance over at the apartment where Frank Gordon had lived. So close. Too close. I hadn’t heard anyone come to clean out his apartment yet. I wondered if he had family.
