by Belle Malory
Foretell
By Belle Malory
Belle Malory Copyright © 2012 Belle Malory All rights reserved.
ISBN-13: 978-1478102144
ISBN-10: 1478102144
This book is a work of fiction.
Names, characters, places and incidents are either products of the author’s imagination or used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locales or persons are coincidental.
Cover art by Sybille Sterk: http://magpiemagic.blogspot.co.uk/
Model: Jessica Truscott http://jessicatruscott.weebly.com/
You can visit Belle Malory at: http://bellemalory.blogspot.com
Table of Contents
Prologue
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Chapter 32
Chapter 33
Chapter 34
Chapter 35
Chapter 36
Chapter 37
Chapter 38
Chapter 39
Epilogue
Part One
The Oracle
“Deep in the man sits fast his fate. To mould his fortunes, mean or great.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson, Fate
Prologue
A beast lived inside of me.
At least, that’s the way I thought of it. An evil, life-sucking beast that reared its ugly head whenever the opportunity presented itself. It growled from within, never giving me the option to tame the thing, to harness it. I never knew where it came from, why it found me or what I’d done to deserve it.
My foolish little sister once referred to the beast as a gift.
A gift.
Madness, of course. Gifts are pretty boxes fastened with colorful bows, received on birthdays and for Christmas. Gifts can also be referred to as someone’s talent for playing a musical instrument or their superiority in academics. Gifts are things of beauty and pleasure.
Whatever I possess was definitely not a gift.
My first recollection of it came on a bleak day in mid-September. I remember the day perfectly, as if it were yesterday…I was ten years old. The cloudless sky was a misty gray. Damp fog blanketed the ground, creating a sort of creepy atmosphere. The black dress I wore was stiff from newness. I pulled at the starchy fabric constantly, the stupid thing not letting me breathe.
Although many people surrounded me, my world was quieter than usual. No one was chastising Irene and me for roughhousing or playing pranks on one another. There were no secret whispers or giggles shared between us, a normal habit of the Spencer sisters during dull, formal events.
None of those things were going on because our father, our handsome father, lay in an oak casket not far from where we stood.
The casket was a gift from his commanding officer. Soldiers in battle were engraved into the wood on the side panel. I stared at it intently. It was so detailed, almost magical even. The soldiers appeared lifelike, as if in motion. A haunting yet beautiful image.
Ironically, he hadn’t died in service. It would’ve made more sense if he had since he was so young. Instead, cancer took him away from us. Lung cancer, they’d called it. It wasn’t the type you saw in movies where the process was long and drawn out. My father never received chemotherapy. He never got radiation treatments. There wasn’t time for any of that. He simply found out too late.
I stood on my tiptoes, trying to see inside the casket. Daddy’s face was expressionless. He looked so different from how he looked in life. The slight smile betraying his dimples was missing. His skin appeared harder. Paler, too. I missed his rosy cheeks, shaded by the light stubble of his twenty-four hour five o’clock shadow. I missed the twinkle in his brown eyes, the scent of black coffee on his breath, his dedication to helping me build my dollhouse, his unwavering love for us all…
I missed him. Period.
My mother cried nonstop from the moment she awoke this morning (and sometimes while she slept last night).
Eventually the heart wrenching sobs were silenced, but her tears continued to flow with abandon. Even now it was eerie to look at her. Her face was still and unmoving, like a ceramic doll’s. Her cheeks, however, remained red and blotchy, wet with tears she couldn’t keep from coming. Large hazel eyes set within her round face, bearing an empty sort of gaze; she seemed to stare at nothing most of the time. I wished I could make her feel better, if only for a moment. I attempted it this morning, by embracing her in a bear hug. She merely pushed me away as she wiped at her eyes with a tissue.
I was beginning to feel as if I’d lost two parents instead of one.
While the pastor gave the eulogy, a small hand encircled mine. The hem of my sister’s pink dress brushed against my leg. Amidst the dreary sea of grays and blacks, the bright color uplifted me.
My grandparents had struggled with Irene this morning, trying to convince her to wear the black dress they purchased specifically for the funeral. Irene refused to put it on. She threw a particularly nasty tantrum, shouting until she got her way. She wanted to look pretty for daddy and the pink gown was her favorite.
Normally I would’ve helped calm my sister, persuade her to listen to our grandparents. This time I stood by watching from the sidelines, almost in admiration of Irene. There was a passionate energy behind her determination to wear the pink gown. Hardly motivated to get dressed today, I couldn’t have cared less what color I wore.
In the end our grandparents caved and my sister got her way, as usual. Though Irene won that battle by being a brat, I was bizarrely proud of her for it.
“Essie,” Irene whispered to me.
“Mommy’s sad.”
I nodded, holding my gaze straight, keeping my eyes locked on the pastor.
“I don’t want her to be sad anymore, Essie. I want her to smile. How can I make her smile?”
I almost snorted at the impossible notion-and would have. But it was at that exact moment when everything changed.
All things considering, maybe I’d pinpointed that moment since it was such a pivotal one. But it was the first time I felt it, really felt the beast inside me become unleashed.
I shivered as a thousand invisible, tiny needles pricked at my skin, spreading waves of tingles up and down my body. Little flickering lights obstructed my vision, blurring my surroundings.
An achiness churned violently inside my stomach, nauseating me from the pain.
Before I could comprehend what was happening, I turned to my sister and said, “Walk over to Mommy and sing her favorite song. Curtsy and smile. Give her a good show.”
As soon as I uttered the words, it was as if some heavy weight had been lifted from my shoulders. The little flickering lights disappeared. My stomach settled.
The pastor had only just finished speaking. The Honor Guard took their places to show their respect. In a few moments, they would fire off their rifles in honor of my father’s military service.
Though I was only slightly older than my sister, she still looked up to me. She followed my instructions and walked over to our mother. I covered my mouth in distress. My
eyes grew round with the fear of what I’d just done. She wasn’t in her right mind and I didn’t want her to push Irene away like she’d done with me earlier. Not in front of everyone.
Not like this.
Why, oh why had I told my sister to sing? I didn’t understand where those words came from.
They just sort of…came.
I watched in apprehension while my sister sang. It was a lullaby, Mom’s favorite. Silence spread over the crowd as everyone turned to listen. For as young as she was, Irene possessed a pretty-ish voice, soft and melodic.
Brown curls bobbed as my sister twirled adorably for our mother. Her hazel eyes beheld her youngest daughter in rapt attention, as if she were in a trance.
Then, a slight curve of her lips. A twinkle of humor in her eye. Our mother smiled. Smiled.
By the time Irene curtsied, she was chuckling. Everyone thought my sister was wonderful and clapped in unison for her.
It worked.
I was stunned. My mother had been a zombie for the last few days. To see her face come alive again with laughter was definitely unexpected.
At the time, I thought it an extraordinary coincidence. Irene’s question was such an innocent one, after all. How can I make her smile? And the strange words that came out of me had produced innocent results. Nothing to cause alarm over.
Irene never thought it was a coincidence though. From that day forward, she knew there was something different about what I could do for people. About what I could tell them, what I could give them. She saw the beauty in it, the pleasure. She saw a gift.
God, how I wished it had only been a coincidence.
One
“You don’t need the stupid dress.”
My statement was strong, founded on rational grounds. I wouldn’t give in to her wants anymore. I urged myself to feel a sense of empowerment, refusing to let my sister use me again.
It wouldn’t have been half as bad if I could ignore her or block out the symptoms. It was as if I could feel it though, the wanting growing inside of her. Even at a distance, her wishes pulled at my core, compelling me to move towards her.
“How long do you plan to keep your post?” Indie called out to me from our upstair’s window. Her voice was bored, slightly impatient. She spared me only half of her attention. The other half was spent sending a text message to one of her friends. Clearly, she had better things to do rather than argue with me.
“As long as it takes,” I shouted from my safe harbor on the far end of the rooftop.
She groaned from inside the house, which was followed by an annoyed remark at how ridiculous I was acting. We both knew once she got a hold of me I would tell her how to get the dress. It was inescapable. As soon as she touched me, my voice would speak of its own accord.
My usual symptoms began to act up: clammy skin, dizziness, nausea. My entire body yearned to tell Indie how to get what she wanted, but I was determined to hold my ground on this one. I would fight her tooth and nail, if that’s what it took. As long as she didn’t touch me while she asked me how to get the dress, I could beat her.
Squeezing my eyes shut, I swallowed back the bile rising in my throat and took several deep breaths. I ground my fingers into the rough, scratchy shingles, preventing myself from swaying backwards. A few moments later, I heard someone else approach the window.
“Why are you being such a brat, Estelle?” my mother questioned me irritably. Lines crinkled around the corners of her mouth and eyes. The only time any lines formed within her face was when she was annoyed, revealing her true age.
“Don’t you want your sister to have the dress? She’s attending a very important event.”
“That dress costs five thousand dollars,” I said. “If she wants it, tell her to go pay for it, just like anyone else would have to.”
Leaning against the window frame, my mother casually held up one of her hands, inspecting her manicure. She didn’t seem at all shocked by my rebellion. In fact, she seemed as equally as bored as Indie. “Do you really want your sister to have to pay that much?”
I rolled my eyes. “She’s worth eleven million, Mom. I’m sure she can afford to lose a few grand.”
“You’re not being very sisterly, you know. Now be a good girl and come inside. Tell Indie how to get the dress.”
“No.” I flinched even as I said the word.
My mother would not be happy about my disobedience. It wasn’t often I fought her. Giving my family what they desired usually felt good. Leading Indie to her rise to fame, for example, was something I’d truly enjoyed. She’d always been a talented singer, and now the whole world knew it. More than that, my sister reveled in the spotlight. I loved seeing her so happy, knowing I’d helped to make her that way.
Today was different though. True, the dress wasn’t something I cared to give my sister when she could easily buy it herself. But I doubted it was the underlying spark to my defiance.
Perhaps I was finally pissed off enough to act out. The unfairness of it all had been eating at me for a while. Just once, I wished I could have control over this thing that fed on other people’s desires. I wanted my own voice back.
The two of them bickered inside of the house. Mom ordered Indie to fetch me, but my sister was deathly afraid of heights. No way she would come out onto the roof. I smirked, listening to her adamant refusal. I should’ve used the roof as a hiding place long ago.
Eventually my mom sighed and bent down to remove her heels. Before I knew what was happening, she was climbing out of the window.
“Don’t you dare, Rachel!”
Sometimes I called my mother by her name for the shock value, but she didn’t even flinch this time. Wobbly, she held her arms out, balancing herself on the tilted roof. Once she gained a sturdy footing, she began inching towards me. I scooted back from where I sat, scraping my skin against the shingles in the process. My eyes darted behind me. Nowhere left to go except over the ledge, and then two stories to the ground. I eyed the drop warily. Looked like a long ways down from up here.
I didn’t want to break a limb. Not over a stupid dress.
It just wasn’t worth it.
My mom’s manicured hand snaked around my arm. “How does Indie get the Valli dress?” she demanded. “Without having to pay for it.”
She knew me too well.
Familiar goose bumps spread along my arms and tingled down my spine. As usual, the desire paired with my mom’s touch was a force too strong to overcome. My symptoms became unbearable. Soon enough, I found myself speaking against my will. “Two-one-two, five-oh-seven, six-eight-seven-three.”
Immediately, I felt lighter. My fight was lost.
“Is that a phone number?” my mom asked.
I nodded, ashamed I hadn’t been able to keep the information from her, and ashamed I was giving in to her once again. I ground out my next words angrily. “It’s Giambattista Valli’s personal cell. If he knows it’s for Indie, he’ll give her the dress for free.”
My sister clapped excitedly. “Hells yeah! Omigod, thank you, Mommy! This is so exciting. Everyone will be so jealous when they see me wearing the newest Valli.”
Thank you, Mommy, her words echoed in my mind annoyingly. My fists clenched with the urge to strangle the excitement from Indie’s throat. Lucky for her, I wasn’t up to murdering anyone today.
My mother’s mouth curved into a smug grin. “That’s a good girl, Estelle. You’re truly a gem.”
I rolled my eyes again. “Glad to be your puppet.”
Once they were gone, I crawled back into the house, shaking with anger. I ran to my room, slamming the door behind me. I knew it would do no good, my slamming of it. My mom and sister were probably already downstairs waiting for the car. They wouldn’t concern themselves with something as minute as my feelings.
Still, it felt kind of nice. So I opened it back up and slammed it again.
Afterwards, I fell into my bed face-first and growled unbecomingly into the pillow. While beating the mattress wi
th my fist, I let the rest of my pent up anger out. It surprised me, knowing I had so much rage boiling inside me.
It took a while before my breathing returned to a normal pace and my limbs stilled. I wasn’t sure what had bothered me so much this time. I didn’t usually let it bother me this much.
The May second square, circled in red on the calendar, teased me from the wall. Only one month to go until my birthday.
I’d be eighteen-years-old finally.
Most teenagers viewed the age of eighteen as something akin to freedom. I guess it could mean so many things…like college and leaving the family nest. Or it could mean getting a job, paying bills and learning how to cook. I wondered what eighteen meant for me. Was it only another day?
Or could it be the start of something more?
I gazed out my bedroom window, noticing the bright colors of springtime blooming within our neighborhood. Next year I could be staring out of a different window, possibly in the midst of a studious university, where the bricks and mortar bespoke of generations of young adults searching for themselves and their independence.
I shook my head, realizing the impossibility of being on my own. What was I thinking? I could never go to an actual university with other college students. It would be extremely stupid of me, especially after what had happened with Katie.
The memory of my old friend drew a sigh from my lips. I’d only attended half a year of high school because my mother decided to homeschool me after she found out about Katie Sorenson.
Katie and I had been best friends since grade school. She’d mentioned how she wished the most popular boy in school could be her boyfriend. So I told Katie how to do it. She hadn’t touched me and I hadn’t been forced to say anything. I told her how to capture her crush’s heart-simply because I wanted to. I told her what the boy’s interests were, where he hung out after school, what she could say to make him laugh, and what she could wear that he would think was pretty.
Katie thought nothing of it. In her mind, I’d only given out some awesome advice. I was being a good friend. My mother, on the other hand, freaked out when she learned what I’d done. By chance, she overheard Katie thanking me and put two and two together. She pulled me out of school the very next day.
