In the end, all he could do was try his absolute best. That was all he had to offer, but if for some reason that ended up not being enough, he knew he could lose everything.
Not just his wife, but his job, too.
Chapter 4
Alicia rolled her car to a complete stop, just outside their local mall entrance, and waited for the light to change. What she’d really wanted to do was head over to one of the larger malls that carried the higher brand-name labels, but at the same time, she didn’t want to chance driving all the way to Oakbrook or downtown Chicago because in a couple of hours, traffic would be treacherous. Then, if she wasn’t able to get back home until early evening, she’d have to deal with Phillip and all of his questions. And she didn’t want that. They’d finally called a truce, and she wanted to keep it that way. She wanted them to have peace, love, and understanding in their household, and she wouldn’t do anything to ruin it. Not today, anyway. She couldn’t promise him total cease and desist when it came to the amount of money she spent, but she was going to try her best to do better than she had been. She wouldn’t buy cheaply manufactured items, not under any circumstances, but what she would do was try to buy less in quantity.
When the light turned green, Alicia proceeded into the parking lot and drove around to Macy’s. When she found an open stall, she pulled in it, turned off her ignition, and got out of her car. After locking it, she was striding toward the building when she heard someone calling her name.
“Alicia,” the male voice yelled again, and when she turned around, she saw that it was Levi Cunningham, one of Deliverance Outreach’s former but biggest financial supporters—and one of the biggest drug dealers in the region.
“Hey, how are you?” she said as he walked closer to where she was standing.
“I’m good, and I see you’re looking as fine as always.”
“Thank you.” She wanted to tell him the same thing because he’d always been one of the finest men she’d ever laid eyes on, but as a married woman, she knew it would be inappropriate so she said nothing.
“So, I hear you’re married now,” he said as if he’d been reading her mind.
“I am.”
“Happily married or just married?”
“Happily.”
“Is that right? Well, I’m really sorry to hear that.”
Alicia smiled and looked away.
“Come on now, you know I always wanted you to be my girl but your father wasn’t having it. Not one bit.”
“Oh, well.”
“So, is this husband of yours treating you like royalty? Is he treating you the way a princess like you deserves to be treated? Because from what I hear, he’s working as your father’s assistant. Now, I’ll admit that I don’t have a clue about what the going salary is for an assistant pastor, but somehow I can’t imagine it being enough to take care of you. Not Pastor Black’s daughter. Not the woman who’s used to the good life and all its splendor. I mean, he might be able to pay a few bills around your house and what not, but can he buy you all the things you love and need? Can he do all of that? Can he give you everything you want and then some?”
“Good-bye, Levi,” Alicia said, and started walking away.
“Well, if you ever need anything, you can find me at my mom’s restaurant over on Chestnut. I hang out there just about every evening for dinner.”
“Good-bye, Levi,” Alicia repeated, and walked inside the doorway. A few seconds later, he walked in behind her, but thankfully all he did was smile and stroll past.
Alicia stopped in the first department she came to, which was shoes, and browsed through the sandal section. She couldn’t stop thinking about Levi, and she felt guilty. She couldn’t deny the attraction she had for him, not years ago when she was a lot younger, and not now that she was twenty-two and married to someone else. She knew Levi was bad news, and this was the main reason her father had told him his daughter was off-limits.
It was also the reason that a couple of years ago, her father had sat him down and told him that Deliverance Outreach could no longer accept his generous donations. Levi rarely attended service, but he’d told her father that he admired him, that he loved all the things her father was doing for the community, and that he wanted to support all his efforts. Which had been fine until her father had changed for the better and decided it wasn’t right for the church to benefit from drug money. Levi had never talked about what he did for a living and her father had never asked him one way or the other, but everyone knew what Levi did. They knew he ran a major conglomerate—an illegal conglomerate for sure, but a conglomerate nonetheless. They knew he had lots of people working for him, everyone from narcotics officers to petty street dealers, and that he never physically moved any drugs or used them. Everyone knew he was basically as clean as a whistle, essentially untouchable as far as the law was concerned, and that he was a very wealthy man.
Alicia picked up a pair of strappy sandals, checking to see what the price was, but as soon as she did, she felt someone rub their hand across her back. She jumped to the side, then realized it was her stepmother.
“Oh. Charlotte, it’s you. You scared me.”
“Well, I certainly didn’t mean to do that. How long have you been here?”
“Not long. Not long at all.”
“Neither have I. But I’m getting ready to head up to the Ralph Lauren section if you wanna come.”
“That’s fine. I sort of like these sandals but…”
“But what?”
“I already have a pair sort of just like them. The heel is a lot shorter, but they look pretty similar.”
“And since when do you care about anything like that?” Charlotte teased as they headed toward the escalator.
“Since Phillip started complaining about how much money I spend.”
“Uh-oh. You know I’ve already been there and done that with your dad, and it definitely wasn’t a happy time in our marriage.”
“I know.”
“We argued all the time, and it even got to the point where I stopped showing him any of the things I bought.”
“I stopped showing Phillip pretty much as soon as we got married.”
“I know it’s tough, but the good news is that I’m sure things will get better. Phillip will eventually earn a lot more money than he does now, and then he won’t care about what you buy. I remember how upset your dad used to get when I shopped for myself, for you, and even for Matthew, but as soon as he got his first major book deal and started earning a lot of royalty dollars, his whole attitude about my spending changed for the better. Then he started earning thousands from every speaking engagement he scheduled, and the ministry grew larger every single year. Although, since your father earns so much from outside sources, he doesn’t take as much of a salary from the church as he could, because he wants all the money from tithes and offerings to go back into the ministry.”
“Well, I just hope Phillip finally wakes up and starts being a lot more ambitious. I keep telling him that what he needs to do is work toward moving into a senior pastor position at a mega-church in one of the major cities.”
“Hmmm.”
Alicia frowned. “What?”
“Well, don’t you say anything to Phillip until he tells you himself, but I was talking to your dad a little while ago and he was saying how he’d just had a conversation with Phillip and that he let him know that he was grooming him for either the top position at Deliverance Outreach or at a future location in another city. So, as much as I know you don’t want to hear it, I doubt Phillip is going to be looking for anything else anytime soon. He’s always been happy working for your dad, but now that he knows the actual plans that Curtis has for him, I’m sure he’s even more content.”
“Well, that’s just great.”
“Everything will work itself out.”
“I don’t see how. Not when Phillip makes less than a hundred thousand dollars.”
“But it won’t always be that way. He’ll eventu
ally make a lot more.”
“When?”
“I don’t know, but he will.”
Alicia picked up a sleek-looking black jean blazer and matching jean pants by Ralph Lauren but quickly placed them back on the rack.
“You like that?” Charlotte asked.
“Yeah, but I promised myself I’d cut down my spending just to keep peace between Phillip and me, and I’m really trying to stick to that.”
“Is it your size?”
Alicia checked the labels and saw that both were a six. “Yep, but oh well.”
“Give them to me,” Charlotte told her, and took them away from her. Then, she walked over to the checkout counter.
“You really don’t have to do that.”
“I know, but I want to. I know exactly how you feel, and it’s the least I can do for you.”
Alicia hugged her stepmother, who, at only nine years her senior, was more like a friend. “Thanks for everything.”
“You’re quite welcome.”
When they headed back down the escalator, they hugged again, exited through separate doorways, and out to their respective parking areas. Alicia was so excited about the outfit Charlotte had purchased, but just in case Phillip still had a problem with her buying something new, even though she hadn’t paid for it herself, she decided it was best not to bring it into the house until later. Or tomorrow if that ended up being a better bet.
She walked toward her car but stopped in her tracks when she saw Levi driving toward her in a shiny black, freshly washed Lexus LS 460. He drove behind her car and rolled down his window. “Don’t forget what I told you. If you ever need anything, you can find me at my mom’s restaurant.”
Alicia opened her trunk, placed her new clothing inside it, and then closed it back down.
“Hiding your own stuff from your own husband?”
How in the world did he know? Did she look that obvious?
“Shame, shame. A gorgeous-looking woman like you, hiding what she bought because her husband doesn’t think she deserves to wear quality clothing.”
“That’s not it at all,” Alicia tried to explain, but she knew her words were unconvincing.
“Then why’d you just put that Macy’s garment bag in your trunk and not inside your car?”
“Does it matter one way or the other?”
“No, but I’m just calling things as I see them. I’m an analytical kind of guy, and I pay attention to even the smallest of details.”
“Apparently so. But you’re wrong about me.”
“Is that right?”
“Yes, it is.”
“Hey, whatever you say. But seriously, though, I hope you’ll call me if you need me because I really am here for you. Your dad ended my relationship with the church, and I totally respect his reasoning behind it, but I still care about him, his family, and especially you. I know you’re married, and I guess I’m going to have to respect that as well, but I can’t help the way I feel about you. I’ve always been attracted to you, and I think you’ve always felt the same way about me.”
“Levi, please. We’ve only seen each other maybe five or six times over the last four years. We barely even know each other.”
“I know what I like, and it doesn’t take a hundred meetings for me to recognize that.”
Alicia felt her stomach fluttering. “I have to go.”
“That’s fine, but you just remember what I said, okay?”
He watched her for a few lingering seconds and then drove away.
Alicia sat inside her car and leaned her head against her headrest.
She sat there, feeling more guilty than she had earlier, and then she prayed that Levi would never approach her again.
She prayed and then drove home to her husband.
Chapter 5
Alicia slipped on a baking mitt, eased open the stainless steel oven door, and pulled out the dish of orange roughy she was preparing for dinner. She set it on top of the stove, uncovered it, took a careful look at one of Phillip’s favorite dishes, and then re-covered it so that it would stay warm. It was finally done, and now all she had to do was sauté the asparagus, remove the salad she’d made, and place a few rolls inside the dish sitting on the island.
During her drive home from the mall, Alicia had done a lot of thinking and had decided it was time she worked a little harder on her marriage. She’d decided this mainly because of the tense encounter she’d just had with Levi—tense because she hadn’t liked the feelings she’d had around him and tense because for a split second, and only a split second, she hadn’t thought about Phillip. She hadn’t thought about her husband, the man she loved, the man she’d taken vows with, the man she’d promised to cherish always. And that scared her. It scared her because the last thing she wanted was to be unfaithful…or be like her father used to be. She couldn’t deny that she certainly was her father’s daughter in a number of different ways, but she didn’t want to follow anywhere close in his footsteps when it came to having affairs or hurting innocent people.
Which was why she’d rushed over to the grocery store and picked up everything she needed so she could prepare Phillip a nice dinner. They’d already called a truce earlier, but Alicia was hoping that the gesture she was making now would help validate her efforts even further.
Alicia heard the garage door shutting and then saw Phillip walking inside the house. He smiled at her in silence and strode over to where she was standing. Then, he stepped directly behind her, wrapped his arms around her waist, and kissed her on her neck. Alicia closed her eyes and felt more at ease than she had in weeks.
Phillip held her close and then squeezed her tightly. “I love you so much. I love you so much that it hurts.”
Alicia turned around to face him and smoothed her hand across his cheekbone and down toward his chin. “I love you, too.”
Her husband was truly a handsome man. His complexion was flawless, his teeth were pure white and perfect, and he actually reminded her of her father. She remembered watching a talk show once and hearing a relationship expert speaking about women who sometimes choose husbands who have similar physical characteristics as their fathers, and while she hadn’t paid much attention to it before, right now she could see the similarities as plain as day.
Alicia and Phillip locked eyes with no words to speak and then kissed forcefully and passionately. They shared such a beautiful moment, and it reminded Alicia of the way things had once been between them while they were dating and then during their first four months of marriage.
“Maybe we should just skip dinner,” Phillip finally suggested while still holding her in his arms.
“You think?”
“Well, maybe not skip it altogether but maybe put it on hold so to speak.”
Alicia double-checked the stove, making sure it was off, and Phillip grabbed her hand and led her upstairs.
Phillip slipped on his plush blue terry-cloth robe and then helped Alicia into a matching one, but when she started to walk away, Phillip stopped her. “Hey. Come here, you.”
Alicia slid closer to him and Phillip kissed her again.
Then he gazed into her eyes. “Baby, whether you realized it or not, I really, really needed to make love to you. I thought about you all day, and while I found myself feeling every emotion imaginable, mostly I felt a lot of sadness and pain.”
“I felt the same way, but I promise you we’ll do whatever we have to to keep our marriage strong. We love each other, and I’m just going to believe that love is what will always sustain us in the end.”
“And it will. It has to.”
After lighting two candles in long-stemmed holders, Alicia and Phillip sat down at the dining room table and held hands while Phillip said grace.
“Dear Heavenly Father, we just want to take a moment to, first, thank You for just being You. Then, we thank You for our marriage, for the wonderful life You have given us, for keeping us in great health and for the food my beautiful wife has prepared for us to eat. Thes
e and many other blessings I ask in Your son Jesus’ name, Amen.”
Alicia squeezed her husband’s hand. “Amen.”
“This smells delicious.”
“It does, but I hope it tastes good.”
Phillip was in the midst of eating his salad but reached his fork into the dish of roughy and sliced a small piece of it. He took a bite and nodded. “It’s very good. Excellent.”
“I’m glad.”
“You know I love baked fish.”
“Yeah, and that’s why I wanted to make it for you.”
“And I appreciate it.”
Alicia tore her dinner roll in half and glanced over at her husband, who looked so happy and more content than he had been in days. She watched him and prayed that their marriage would be okay. She was willing to work hard at making things right on her end, but she prayed that Phillip would at least meet her halfway. She prayed that he would eventually come to understand why she couldn’t simply dress in an average sort of way or simply be pleased with the idea of only shopping maybe once a month. She knew Phillip was fine with living that way, but she hoped that maybe he’d come to realize that no two people were alike and that they each had different wants and desires when it came to certain material possessions.
“So, I was chatting with your dad today, and from the way he was talking, he wants to keep me around for a very long while. He even talked about my possibly heading up Deliverance Outreach at some point or maybe a new location in a different city.”
Alicia thought back to what Charlotte had told her earlier and while she wanted to be happy for Phillip, she felt somewhat indifferent because if he continued working for her father, it would be years before he made the kind of money she needed him to make. But she kept her thoughts and ideas to herself because she didn’t want to ruin the wonderful evening they were having.
The Best of Everything Page 4
