“Hmm,” Cal said out loud as he thought. Dad always said that there was unity and structure in the armed forces. From what Cameron is saying, there’s a big rift here. Let’s hope they can keep it together at least until we land.
“We don’t have our peacemakers with us,” added Dr. Taylor in a sad tone. “Dr. Benedict was always quite good at soothing the command staff when their feathers got ruffled. And I don’t know a man alive that could stand against the kindness and reasoning of Dr. Kimura.”
An awkward silence descended again as the three avoided eye contact with each other. After a minute, Colonel Dayton yelled down from the bridge.
“Drisko! Are you still down there?”
“Yes sir,” he replied.
“Get your butt up here.”
“Yes sir.” Drisko heaved once and shot up the staircase to the bridge.
Cal remained at the landing with Dr. Taylor. He decided to press her for more information.
“Forgive me, Doc. I don’t know a whole lot about some people. My dad was kind of vague when he described what Grandpa did for Project Columbus, but in my dreams Grandpa keeps referring to this Dr. Benedict. Who was he, exactly?”
Her brown eyes met with his and she grabbed her braided hair as a young girl might. “He’s the man who dared to dream about the potential of Project Columbus, and then dared to make it happen. Possibly one of the most dedicated men that I have ever worked with.” Her eyes wandered off into the distance and she seemed to be lost in a memory. “A man who sacrificed so much, both inadvertently and intentionally.”
“What do you mean by that?”
She laughed nervously and looked at the ceiling. “My husband, God rest his soul, was not the first man I chose. My heart belonged to the dashing and handsome young David Benedict. I tried to get him to notice me, to take me on a date, to woo me. But after a couple years I came to the realization that he was too absorbed in his work. I wanted a family, so I got married and settled down.” Dr. Taylor paused and twirled her braid. “Dr. Benedict was married to Project Columbus. He never married or raised a family. We are his family, in a way.”
Cal took a moment to consider her words. I don’t know, it still sounds like a lonely life to me.
“Actually,” she laughed as she continued, “in a way he did raise a family. He introduced Doctor Kimura to his wife Sarah, and was the godfather of both of the Kimura girls. He had so much influence in our lives outside of the project, just through who he was.”
“I see.” Cal waited for Dr. Taylor to meet his gaze. “So why did he stay behind?”
She sighed. “I can only imagine. He may have got it in his head somehow that his sacrifice would somehow keep us safer.”
“And you don’t believe that,” Cal finished.
Dr. Taylor shook her head, her hair slowly whipping behind her. “I think we could have used a brilliant astrophysicist and an amazing leader.” She craned her neck as if to listen. Cal stopped and listened as well, but heard nothing. “I think it’s just about time. You have a choice to make. Do you know what you’re going to do?”
Cal sighed and dropped his head. “Not a clue.”
Dr. Taylor gently pushed from her railing and floated over to Cal. She placed her hand on his. Her touch was comforting, but raised doubt within him at the same time. “You’ve always been honest with me. Just be honest with yourself.”
He nodded. What do I want, honestly? She told me what the choices were: stay on the maintenance revival list and take anti-psychotic drugs, or be placed in hibernation and receive treatment after arrival. Cal reached to his temple and ran his fingers across the scab of the wound he received years ago on the transport. The drugs should help fix my issues, but Doc said the more times I go in and out of hibernation, the greater the chances I’ll lose my mind completely. He looked at his taped hand and slowly flexed his fingers. He closed his eyes as the dull pain throbbed in his digits. But if I go to sleep, I will have no break from my nightmares for over thirty years.
“Calvin,” he heard Cameron Drisko say, “Colonel Dayton will see you and Doctor Taylor now.”
Cal opened his eyes and looked to the top of the staircase. Drisko floated there in a pose close to attention. Cal thought that his friend looked every bit the soldier, and could not help but feel a measure of envy. Every one of his friends on the ship has a clear place and purpose. Cal had a job, but he was replaceable.
Josephson was right. I am nothing but Dr. Taylor’s pet. I don’t belong with the crew.
Cal kicked gently off of the deck plate and rose to the command platform. Drisko motioned to the command chair, where Dayton was already waiting, before himself departing back down the stairs.
He looks almost like a king there, he thought. He might as well be, on this ship. And I’m just the peasant who is about to beg for his fate.
Cal halted his motion a few feet from the colonel. Dr. Taylor took a similar position on the opposite railing, and spoke. “Colonel Dayton, I have some troubling news.”
Dayton folded his hands. Cal could see the man’s knuckles turn white as he clasped his fingers tightly together. “This seems to be the day for it. What’s going on?”
Dr. Taylor frowned slightly. “Calvin came to me with some medical concerns. After speaking with him and performing a diagnosis, I believe it likely that he has Hibernation Psychosis.”
The commanding officer of Michael stared at Cal intently for a moment, and then bowed his head and brought his locked hands to his face. Silence blanketed the bridge for minutes; the weight felt as if it would suffocate Cal.
I’m a burden, as always.
Dayton glanced up again. “Very well, Doctor. Have you explained to him what this means and what his options are?”
“Yes, Colonel.”
“Have you made your choice, Mr. McLaughlin?”
Cal hesitated for a moment. “I have, sir.”
Dayton looked crestfallen as he sighed. “I see. May I speak my mind before you tell me your decision, Mr. McLaughlin?”
“It’s your ship, sir. I believe you can do whatever you like.”
The colonel dropped his hands to his lap. “Let me rephrase that. Are you going to listen to me if I speak my mind?”
“Of course, sir.” But probably not for long.
“This cycle has started off absolutely terribly,” he started, as if giving a lecture. “One passenger is dead, and one of my crew almost suffered the same fate. I’ve got the commanding officer of another ship stonewalling me for no good reason. The other commanding officer is ignoring me altogether.” Dayton paused and beat his hands against his lap, clearly frustrated. “We’re all in a sticky situation here. I could use you. You’re clearly bright, you learn quickly, and have earned the respect of the crew. Please consider taking the meds and staying on with us.”
Cal let the colonel’s plea sink in. It seemed contrary to the view that Cal held of himself. I’m not a hero. I’m a pet. How useful could I possibly be? Cal searched inside for an answer to the question. The response came in the form of Dr. Taylor’s voice, recalled from his mind.
You’ve always been honest with me. Just be honest with yourself.
“Sir, I don’t think you should rely on me,” he said as he tried to mask his anger with himself.
Dayton closed his eyes and asked, “Why not?”
“Because I haven’t been completely honest with you, sir. You place more faith in me than what I have returned to you.” Cal paused. “Colonel Dayton, sir. Please look at me.” Dayton opened his eyes and locked gaze with Cal. A lump rose within Cal’s throat, but he continued. “I used the knowledge that I learned from Doctor Taylor and the security code that you had Hunter issue to me for a very selfish purpose.”
“Something tells me I don’t want to know what that is, Mr. McLaughlin,” Dayton interrupted.
“With all due respect, sir, too bad,” he continued, unfazed. He was aware of the weight of Dr. Taylor’s stare just as keenly as that of the colonel�
��s. “During the last maintenance cycle I revived one of the passengers and showed her the stars from the ESAARC cockpit on my sleeper pod. I spent a couple hours talking with her before placing her back in stasis, at which point I broke my hand by punching my sleeper berth.”
Dayton looked at Cal in utter shock. “Why on Earth would you do that?”
Cal sighed. “Because I’m a bigger idiot than you think, sir.”
“He’s in love with her, Colonel,” added Dr. Taylor.
Dayton glanced back and forth between Cal and the doctor. “You knew about this?”
“Only that he was in love, not what he had done.”
Don’t defend me, Doctor. Maybe he’ll change his mind about me. Cal sighed. Then I wouldn’t have to make the decision myself.
Colonel Dayton shook his head and laughed softly. “Mother Mary and all the saints, Mr. McLaughlin. Thank you for reminding me of what it means to be eighteen and in love.”
“Sir?”
“I have to say, that’s probably both the grandest and dumbest thing I’ve ever heard a kid do for love. You’ve got moxie, I’ll give you that much.” The smile disappeared from his face and his glare became harsher. “But I know you won’t be doing that again. Not till we make it to Demeter, at least. Now hurry up and tell me what your decision is.”
Cal nodded. His jaw slacked as he tried to speak, but he stopped himself.
What will it be? Potentially losing your mind, or endless nightmares? He considered both options, and what it would mean to himself and to his new friends on the ship. Hmm… Colonel Dayton said he owes me a favor, didn’t he?
“Sir, may I suggest a compromise alternative?”
Dayton scratched his beard. “What do you have in mind?”
“I don’t like the idea of going completely crazy,” he admitted. “As terrifying as my issues are when I am in hibernation, I think I’ve learned to handle them. I don’t want you to think of me as a complete shirk, though. Wake me up for the final approach cycle. Have Doctor Taylor put me on meds then.”
Colonel Dayton nodded in agreement. “I suppose that’s better than losing you completely. I accept.”
“Great.” Cal smiled and tried his best to put on a puppy face. “Oh, and you told me that if you could do anything for me to let you know, right?”
“That I did, Mr. McLaughlin.”
“Wonderful. I’d like to cash in that favor, then.”
Next time don’t use the word “anything”, Colonel. Cal steeled his resolve and prepared to argue with the exhausted officer for what he wanted.
1st Lt Darius Owens
23 September 2024, 06:15
Michael
Darius sat at his ops console on the bridge. His headset gently caressed his head, but he left the boom raised and away from his mouth. He squirted a swig of coffee from his ration pouch as he listened to another file from the com system null box. The sound of static pierced with an occasional tick told Darius that this was just the background noise of the cosmos.
The bridge was nearly abandoned. Captain Quinn sat on the other side of the command platform at the engineering stations. Quinn worked in dead silence; if Darius had not seen him on the way in, he would not have known of the engineer’s presence.
Colonel Eriksen had not arrived for duty. Darius knew that the colonel had stayed up late the night before in an attempt to come to an understanding with Gabriel’s commanding officer. From the rumors that were flying, Darius did not believe that endeavor ended well.
Darius stretched and yawned, and then opened another file. More white noise filled his ear. He put the valve of his coffee pouch to his lips and took another drink.
“You know that I don’t want liquids around any of the bridge stations, Mr. Owens.” The stern voice of Colonel Eriksen made him jump. He coughed as the warm liquid made its way down his windpipe. “And now you know why.”
Darius hacked and spluttered for a moment as he recovered. He twisted the valve shut and stashed the coffee. “Sorry, sir,” he said as he glanced over his shoulder.
“Finish it outside when you’re done with your monitoring.” Eriksen paused. “Speaking of, are there any messages for us this morning?”
“Let me check these last two files, sir.” He called up the first one and began listening. There seemed to be no difference from any of the previous files. Darius examined his commanding officer’s movements. He’s a lot more tense than normal, Darius thought. “Sir, did your conversation with Colonel Dayton go well?”
Eriksen glared at Darius. “Just listen to the files, Lieutenant.”
I guess that’s a no.
He turned back to his station and opened the second file; this contained yet more cosmic noise. “No messages, sir.”
Eriksen’s beard twisted as he tried to contain whatever was eating him inside. Darius could see a bulge in the colonel’s cheek from where his tongue was pressed against it. He knew this would not mean good things for whoever had upset Eriksen. Darius shuddered in a moment of panic.
Don’t worry, he told himself, you’re just reporting what he asked about. He’s not upset with you, this is about Colonel Dayton.
“Not even a response from Raphael,” Eriksen asked. His calm voice reaffirmed Darius’s apprehension.
“No sir.” He’s not mad at you, he repeated to himself.
A metallic ping echoed through the quiet bridge as the colonel drummed his fingers on the railing. “Captain Quinn, do you still need use of the com system for your investigation?”
“No sir.”
“Shut it down, Mr. Owens.”
Darius stopped for a moment and played back what he had just heard in his mind. “Colonel?”
“You heard me, Lieutenant,” Eriksen said sternly. “Shut down the external com system. I want radio silence all the way to Demeter.”
“Y-yes sir.” Darius unbuckled and pulled himself to the command platform.
“I mean now, Lieutenant,” barked Eriksen as he blocked Darius’s path.
“Yes sir. I don’t have the proper access up here. I have to do it from the computer core,” he responded nervously.
The colonel shook his head and spun his body out of the way. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to take this out on you, Mr. Owens.” The bars of the railing squeaked as he wrung his hands on them. “I gave both of them every chance to cooperate. They can listen to static the rest of the way as far as I care.”
So it’s not just Dayton, it’s Fox too. Darius nodded at Colonel Eriksen and then scrambled from the bridge.
The gallery seemed even colder than usual as Darius made his way to the support section. He scanned the walls and floors as he drifted, wondering about the environmental system operation or the condition of the network cables as they ran through the ship. He tried every trick he knew to keep from thinking about the implications of the order he was about to carry out. It did little good.
There will be no way to call for help from the other ships in an emergency, he thought. Especially if the other colonels order their com systems offline in retaliation. Shivers wracked his body, but they were not from the cold. We also need our com system to receive data from the approach probe when the time comes. No, you can’t let him forget that. That would be a fatal mistake.
Darius entered the core and secured his frame to the terminal chair.
XCS-02 MAINFRAME LOGIN:
Darius logged in.
OWENS, LT. DARIUS. ENABLE VOICE INTERFACE?
Not today, computer. Darius answered with keystrokes.
COMMAND?
His hands rested along the edges of the screen as he stared at the cursor flashing back at him. He hesitated several times as he brought his hands to the screen and started work on disabling the communications system. He fought himself every time he drilled down to a new layer of the software.
This isn’t right. Darius removed his hands from the terminal screen and folded them in his lap. I could simply not do it. He nodded to himself, but cut himself
short. And if Colonel Eriksen finds out, I get put in stasis for the rest of the trip. If we survive and land, I get a hearing for my insubordination.
He placed his hands on the smooth screen and within minutes had executed the colonel’s order. I guess this is called the lesser of two evils. Darius turned off the mainframe terminal screen, closed his eyes, and hung his head. A seed of doubt grew within his mind.
This mission is dangerous enough as it is. Even with everything going smoothly our chances of landing and surviving aren’t great. Despite all that, our COs can’t seem to see eye to eye with each other. He shook his head and sighed. We might as well just open the airlocks and get it over with if we can’t get someone to lead around here.
Darius unbuckled the restraints and shrugged them off, then made his way out of the core and back into the gallery. Emptiness washed over him. He had no duty to perform, and no desire to seek entertainment. He drifted forward aimlessly, propelling himself from brace to brace, over the rows of silent carts, and past the great dark maw leading to the lower level.
Darius grabbed a brace just outside of one of the sleeper pods and halted his momentum. As he clung to it, the bitter cold of the steel felt as if it would burn his hands, but he did not care. He put his cheek to the bare metal and closed his eyes.
Atlanta was never this cold, not even in the winter.
He looked back on how his life had put him aboard this ship, a light year from Earth. Darius had always been smart and athletic, but never stood out at any one thing. He was one of the most talented offensive tackles on his team in high school, but he was nowhere near good enough to get a scholarship for his play. Likewise he had shown a knack for puzzles and computers growing up, yet his other studies held him back in the increasingly competitive arena of college entrance.
Darius laughed under his breath when he remembered meeting the Air Force recruiter. His uniform was neat and crisp, his smile was as warm as the sun, but what Darius remembered most were the words he used. The recruiter filled Darius with confidence that the Air Force could fulfill his dreams of college and travel as easily as a clown might blow up a balloon. Darius had run home to his mother to tell her about the opportunity. Darius remembered how she looked at him with such a cautious expression, but how she relayed to him the stories of what the Army had done for his father, both during and after his service.
Project Columbus: Omnibus Page 22
