At that, Rina sneered again and ran upstairs to her room, slamming the door behind her.
Abby was still wrapping her arms around me and crying. “Buttercup,” I said, “let’s get something to eat. I have a rotisserie chicken in the fridge and some baked potatoes from last night. Let’s eat and not think about Rina’s behavior for now.”
She nodded without a word and the two of us got some plates down and set the table.
“Other than that little bit of drama, how was your day?” I asked her.
She shrugged. “Okay, I guess. James wants to go out again, but I don’t want to anymore. Not after the way that he dumped me for that Emmaline. So, he’s going around and spreading lies about me.” She whispered. “He’s telling people that we slept together. Isn’t that gross?”
I shook my head. “Slept together? You guys are both twelve years old. How is that even possible?”
“Oh, it’s possible. Mom, I know some girls who have done it. Gone all the way. Girls in my class. Now everybody thinks that I’m one of those girls. It’s horrible.”
I sighed. “Abby, honey, did you ever think that maybe those stories about those other girls who have gone all the way, as you put it, aren’t true, either? Rumors have been around since the beginning of time. And they’re just that – rumors. It doesn’t take much at all to get a good story going around, a story that grows taller on down the line. Now, you have to stop this rumor as soon as you can, and, in the meantime, I’m going to have to have a talk with James’ mother.”
James’ mother, whose name was Ann-Marie, was a friend of mine. She was about my age and the two of us got along well when we took Abby and James around on their little dates. I was appalled at his behavior, though. Spreading rumors about little Abby just because she wouldn’t go out with him again?
Oh, to be 12 years old again. I wouldn’t wish that on my worst enemy.
And when I was 12…I didn’t know anybody who went all the way or even claimed to. That just wasn’t a rumor that went around school when I was in the seventh grade. I was shocked that this was something that was said about 12 year olds, but I probably shouldn’t have been shocked at all. This was a different time then the era that I grew up in, and I had to accept that fact.
I felt like an old fuddy-duddy.
Rina came out of her room and stomped down the stairs. “Weren’t you going to call me for dinner?” she demanded.
“No,” I said calmly. “If you want to throw a tantrum, you can, but don’t expect me to go chasing after you. You’re a big girl. You know when to come downstairs. You know that we eat dinner right at 6 PM every night.”
Rina rolled her eyes. “Every night that you’re home this early. Which isn’t a lot.”
I opened my mouth and shut it. She wasn’t wrong about that. My job was demanding, and there were days when I didn’t get home until 8. On those days, the girls ate dinner with Sophia. I was cutting those long days short, more and more, even though I knew that I had to make up that time someplace else. I hadn’t shortened my work-load when I got the girls. I couldn’t. They were added expenses, and I had to work more than ever in order to give them what they needed. Their private school, their cell phones and Internet plans, their clothes and bags and school supplies – it all added up. I was also furiously saving for their college tuition, which was going to be a bear, to say the very least. They were both very bright, and my dream, which was simultaneously my nightmare, would be that they could get into an Ivy League school.
It was my dream because that was what I wanted for them – the very best.
It was my nightmare because I couldn’t imagine footing simultaneous $100,000 a year schooling for each girl. It was $60,000 a year for Harvard now for room, board and tuition. By the time they were ready for school, it might be $100,000 or more a year. That kind of price tag kept me awake at nights.
So, yeah, I had to work my tail off to make sure that the girls had the best of everything. I didn’t want them to want for anything. But that necessarily meant that I was going to be working nights, either at the office or late at night, after they went to bed. That was my life – I was on the hamster wheel and I was never going to get off of it.
I dished a baked potato and a cupful of corn on Rina’s plate, along with a chicken leg. “Rina, now, I know that I have to work late some nights, but I’m doing it for you and Abby. I have to make sure that the two of you get the best education you can, and that’s expensive.”
Rina rolled her eyes. “Mom, you aren’t going to bring back our other mom, no matter how much money you spend on us.” She bit into her chicken leg as she glared at me.
“Where did that come from?” I was perplexed. Rina hit a nerve, for sure – there was a part of me that was still assuaging my guilt over their mother being killed by my client, John Robinson. But how did she work that out in her head?
She shrugged her shoulders. “I talked to my guidance counselor today. I told her about how you work all the time because you want to make sure we go to fancy schools, and she told me that you feel guilty and that’s why you’re doing it. She knows about what John Robinson did to our other mom, too.”
Oh, great. Great. Now I have a 12-year-old who has my number. “Rina, that’s not why I’m spending all this money on private schools and saving up for your possible Ivy League education. I’m doing it because-“
“You love us. I know.” Rina rolled her eyes again and wolfed down the rest of her meal. “Can I go now? Can I be excused?”
I closed my eyes and counted to ten. “Yes,” I said. “You may be excused.” I didn’t usually like it when Rina went upstairs right after dinner. I liked for her to hang out so that I could talk with her about her day. But, right at that moment, I felt like I was at my wit’s end. It was all too much – the cases going crappy today, Jack’s case, and now Abby having to endure scandalous rumors at school. I just wanted to take a bubble bath and crawl into bed and not have to think about much more.
It was either that or take about six shots and passing out, but that wasn’t an option.
That was never going to be an option again.
Abby came over to me and put her hand on my shoulder. “Don’t worry,” she said softly. “Rina’s having problems in school, but she’ll get through it. She misses our birth mother, though, I know she does. I hear her crying out at night in her sleep.”
The girls’ rooms were side by side, separated only by a door. They liked it that way, but I knew that they heard each other when they would snore or talk in their sleep. My room was down the hallway a bit more, so I was insulated from these things.
I sighed. It sounded like I was going to have to talk more with Rina. Try to reassure her and try to get at the root of why she was acting out in school and crying out at night. I knew why, though. I knew why. Her mother was violently murdered. That had to affect her deeply.
As much as I yearned for the days when I didn’t have the responsibility of two traumatized girls under my roof, I knew that those days were long gone. The reality was that I was never going to get a break from my stress. There was never going to be a time when I could just come home, flip on a DVD, and drink and laugh myself silly after a rough day.
This was the life that I chose, and this was the life that I was going to live.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
“So, how did it go, mate?” Axel asked me the next time I saw him. We met for lunch, and, as usual, lunch wasn’t a relaxing time for me. I was on, always on, and I just couldn’t get away from any of it.
“I’m sorry, how did what go?”
“Your pretrial conferences. Did you get those deals to send those two blokes on their way?”
I shook my head. “No. I didn’t.” I sighed. “It looks like there might be even more trials in my near future. I have to think about that, on top of what’s going on with my Uncle Jack. Sometimes I don’t know how I’m going to do it all.”
I didn’t even tell Axel about the Rina thing. That was jus
t one more stressful thing that I had to think about on top of everything else. My talk with her didn’t go well. She pretty much clammed up and refused to tell me much of anything. I tried to get to the root of what she was upset about, but I couldn’t. I was probably going to have to make an appointment for her to speak with a therapist, and that was one more expense that I was going to have to meet.
Axel put his hand on mine. “You’re strong. You’ll get through this. You’ve gotten through everything else. This is child’s play, mate. Child’s play.”
I had to smile. “Child’s play.” I stared down at my half-eaten sandwich. I didn’t have the appetite to even think about taking another bite. “Child’s play.” I sighed. “Why does life have to be so difficult?”
I was whining and I knew it. I just didn’t like it when I didn’t have answers, or when the answers I did have were horrible. As they presently were.
Axel paused and took a sip of water. “This restaurant is nice,” he said, looking around the open-aired space of the Italian restaurant where we met. Then he looked at me. “But I can tell that you are not in the mood to talk about the décor of this place.”
I buttered a piece of bread and didn’t meet his eyes. “No, I guess I’m not. My mother has always told me, and so has Albany, and my sister Emma for that matter, that I get too involved with my cases. Too emotionally attached to my clients. I think that they have a point. I wonder sometimes if I’m in the wrong profession. I mean, what other profession has as a feature that you lose a good 80% of your clients? That’s how many of my clients end going to prison for something, because I plead most of them out. It’s heartbreaking.”
“Why is it heartbreaking, mate? I mean, if your clients did the crime, then they need to pay their debts, right? What am I missing here?”
I sighed. “It’s just not as simple as all of that. My clients, by and large, have come from horrible circumstances. Many of them were abused all their lives, most of their fathers are in prison, most of their mothers have too little time and money for them. They go to schools that don’t teach them and grow up in environments where there is no opportunity. Who can blame them for turning to gangs or dealing drugs? Who can really blame them for holding up a 7-11 so that they can afford diapers and formula for their babies? It just has never seemed fair to me that some people grow up with so little and others grow up with so much, and the ones that grow up with little end up in the prison system where they’re abused further and not given the skills that they need to assimilate into society.”
Back on my soapbox. I had to smile just a little as I saw Axel’s dumbfounded face that was looking more and more perplexed with every word I said.
“Lass, I love that you have such a big heart. Don’t get me wrong. But if somebody is hurting people, by robbing them, or they’re dealing drugs to children, then they need to go away. They need to be taken out of society.”
“Oh? That sounds well and good, but what happens when they come back into society? The prisons aren’t exactly known for trying to rehabilitate their prisoners. They go into prison one way and come out much worse. Add to that the fact that they have a felony conviction on their record, so nobody is going to hire them. What options do they have when they get out? Most of them don’t have even a high school education, either. What can they do? There has to be a better way, other than lock these people up in for-profit prisons, without helping them get their GEDs and learn a trade, so that, when they get out, they have no options other than turning back to the streets.”
Axel’s face was now looking amused. “Oh, my god. I’m in love with a liberal.” He shook his head. “Well, the wedding is off, mate.” He grinned and shook his head. “Just kidding. I love somebody I can spar with.”
“I hope that this is the only issue that we’re going to spar about. Because if you take conservative positions across the board, I’m afraid that this isn’t going to work.” I was dead serious about this.
He smiled. “Don’t worry, I’m sure that there are many areas of agreement that we’re going to have along the way. It’s just that you and I approach the criminal justice system from two very different positions. I’m the one that has to investigate these criminals, and I’m the one who has to speak with the victims. I do agree, though, that prisons should do more to rehabilitate criminals. You have a good point there.”
I sighed with relief. “Thank God.” I took a sip of water and buttered my bread some more. “Let’s change the subject. I need to brainstorm some on my Uncle Jack. That’s the main thing that’s worrying me, other than the fact that Abby’s little ex-boyfriend has been spreading rumors around school that he and Abby had sex.”
Axel raised his eyebrows. “Wait, wait, wait. Abby is 12. What am I missing here?”
I shook my head. “Oh, you’re missing a lot. I said the same damned thing, and then I looked on the Internet, and, sure enough, kids are having sex at her age today. I’m trying to figure out how to deal with this. I’m torn. On the one hand, I want to tell James’ mother that if he doesn’t take back what he said about Abby that I’m going to see to it that he’s prosecuted for statutory rape. But I also think that this would only make things worse for her. I guess I’m hoping that the rumor will just die on its own. After all, from what Abby says, there are lots of girls who get gossiped about that way.”
I shook my head. “Sometimes I forget what a jungle middle-school is. I’m surprised that any of us went to middle school and lived to tell the tale.”
“And that’s the truth, mate. Doesn’t sound like there’s any good options there, although I like the one about threatening to turn James in for statutory rape if he doesn’t tell the truth. That would put the fear into him.”
“Yes, but here’s the rub with that one. If I turn him in for statutory rape, then she goes down too. The statute doesn’t discriminate, although I do think that the girl would get more leniency than the boy would. So, threatening that ultimately wouldn’t have any teeth. His mother would probably see right through that threat. Plus, I don’t want to make Abby’s life any harder than it is. Seventh grade is a disgusting time. I remember it well. Kids are vicious and can be such sneaks. I had hoped that I could insulate the girls from that by sending them to that fancy private school, but low and behold, the kids in that school are just like kids everywhere at that age.”
I fiddled with the bread and the waitress came around and brought us our entrees. Mine was Fettuccine Alfredo with shrimp, while Axel got some kind of steak. I dug into it with gusto. Fettuccine Alfredo was my favorite kind of pasta, even though I could feel my arteries clogging up with every bite I took.
“Well, we’ll come back to that mess later, lass. Tell me what’s going on with your Uncle Jack. You said that you needed to brainstorm it with me.”
“Yes, I do. You were an enormous help with Heather. You really gave me the idea about who to look at for tampering with the crime scene by taking that butcher knife. Maybe you can give me an idea on who to look at for this thing.”
“I’ll do what I can.”
I took a deep breath. “I went to see Steven Heaney yesterday at his home in Oregon,” I said quietly. I hunched down, waiting for the inevitable lecture I was going to get from Axel for going off and seeing a guy who might have been a serial killer. I have to admit, as gambles go, that wasn’t the brightest or most informed thing for me to do.
“I see.” He glared at me. “Lass, what were you thinking of? That bloke could have killed you.” He shook his head. “Why didn’t you ask me to go with you? Did you even bring a gun with you or anything to protect you?”
“I have pepper spray in my purse,” I said. “I always carry that with me, because I can never be sure when one of my clients is going to stalk me because he’s unhappy about something I did.” I dug into my fettuccine some more and started to feel attacked. He was only looking out for me, I knew that, but I didn’t like being talked to like I was five.
“That didn’t answer my question. Why d
idn’t you have me go with you?”
I sighed. “I felt that I needed to see him on my own. I didn’t know what to expect, but it was safe for me to assume that one woman coming to visit wasn’t going to upset him, but two people, a man and a woman, just popping on by might have made him freak out. I needed to be on good terms with him, because I was going to ask him some very important and sensitive questions.” I crossed my arms in front of me and glared at him.
Axel seemed to back down. “Well, you came out of it in one piece, I guess, but don’t do that again. Seriously, Harper, I need to know when you’re going to do something like that. You have a detective on your side. You might think about using him once in awhile. And I’m just going to have to teach you how to fire a gun. I’m sorry, I know that you’re against them on principle, but if you’re going to go and do stupid stunts like see a possible serial killer who lives out in the woods, all by yourself, then I would feel better if you carried. Okay, I said my piece, now go on and tell me what you found out from this bloke.”
“Well, he told me quite a lot. But the things that he told me make me think, more than ever, that my Uncle Jack is guilty. That’s why I need to bounce this off of you. Maybe you can help me see an angle that I never thought about before.”
He nodded his head and cut into his steak, putting a tiny piece of it on my plate. I put that tiny piece in my mouth and closed my eyes. Just like butter. “Well, he told me things that I knew, but also things that I didn’t. One of the things was that there apparently was a third alter in Jack’s psyche. An alter named Sam. Sam was the one who killed Jackson Heaney. So, it wasn’t Eli who killed Jackson, like I had thought, but Sam. Sam apparently is Uncle Jack’s violent side.”
“Well, okay, that’s an interesting wrinkle, but we knew that Jack killed Jackson, so that’s not necessarily new. We just didn’t know that he had yet another alter. Did Steven think that Sam was a violent alter, or did he think that Sam just killed Jackson to protect Jack?”
Harper Ross Legal Thrillers vol. 1-3 Page 80
