by Nashoda Rose
I stared at him, my heart racing, emotions sparking off in every direction. He terrified me, threatened my father, was not a good man and yet… he was. He’d saved my life. Why would he do that? Why had he been watching me? “I don’t understand.”
“There is nothing to understand. Go home, London.” The air around him was dangerous, as if the moment you stepped close enough there was no escape from him and what he wanted.
He strode back to the driver’s door and opened it, his form elegant and at ease again. Casually, he took off his suit jacket and tossed it inside his car. “I’d advise keeping our little meeting from your father and the police. I’ll be in touch.”
“Our… our deal?”
He didn’t turn around as he said, “Anything for you, braveheart.” He bent his tall frame into the luxury car and shut the door and then, while I stood to the side of the path, he drove away.
I watched until the car turned onto the road and disappeared before I dove into my car and found my cell between the console and the seat. I tapped my code then dialed the police, his license plate embedded in my mind.
“Nine one one. What’s your emergency? … Hello?”
Shit.
“Sorry, I hit the emergency button by mistake.”
I hung up.
I JERKED UPRIGHT, the pale green sheet slipping from my shoulders and pooling at my waist. My heart raced and my skin was flushed from the vivid dream—of him. Kai.
Three nights.
Three nights haunted by dreams of him. Sometimes he’d be holding me, gentle and sweet, and other times, he was terrifying as he held a knife to my throat. There were parts of me that believed Kai saved me from the fire because there was good in him. That he wouldn’t hurt my father or me. That maybe Kai wasn’t as bad as I thought.
“Jesus. I’ve lost it.” What was I thinking? He had a knife. He held it to my throat. He worked for people who were obviously dangerous.
And he hadn’t been in contact in three days. I was worried he’d decided to forgo the deal. What then? What would happen to my father?
I’d called my dad numerous times a day, trying to sound normal while inside I freaked out. Kai had given him a week, that was if he decided not to take my deal. That meant my dad was safe for four more days. But it didn’t stop my anxiety. Everywhere I went, I constantly looked over my shoulder, wondering if Kai was behind me or around the next corner; if he was watching me.
God, I was driving myself crazy.
Outside was dark, but the moonlight filtered through the sheer white curtains into my loft. It was an open-concept apartment with fifteen-foot ceilings, exposed ducts, brick walls and no partitions except for the bathroom. My father had insisted I live in a secure, newer building after the fire, so he bought the loft, which was within walking distance to school. An investment, he’d said. I’d argued that it was too much even though he had the money. He’d pointed out the fact that I was on scholarship from all my hard work in high school and he hadn’t paid for my university.
And I loved my loft. It was close to school in a small, six-story, quaint building with security guards, and was quiet so I could study.
Not wanting to go back to sleep and slip into another Kai dream, I slid my legs over the side of the bed to get up and that was when it hit me. His cologne. The scent I’d never forget. Never. It lived inside me, whether I wanted it to or not. Now that it was connected to Kai, it made it that much more powerful.
And it lingered in the air.
I quickly flicked on the bedside light then stood, letting the sheet drop. I wore my usual boxer shorts and a spaghetti-strap pink nightshirt, but suddenly I felt… exposed.
Numerous emotions flooded me all at once. Fear took the lead, but a close second was the fact that my body was hyperaware of him. After three nights of dreaming about him, thinking about him, the heightened awareness amplified.
I stepped off the platform my bed was perched on and the hardwood creaked beneath my bare feet. The sound echoed in the silence and I shivered as my eyes scanned my loft.
Had he been here and left? But how could he get into my place?
I listened for movement, while my gaze searched the shadows. My pulse throbbed beneath the thin layers of skin on my wrists and throat as I waited for the moment I saw him.
But there was no sign of him and the only sound was the streetcar squealing on the tracks outside my open window.
I walked into the kitchen, my heart finally settling back to a quiet rhythm. I reached into the cupboard and took out a glass then set it on the counter. Maybe the stress was making me imagine things. I was on the sixth floor, and we had security. There was no chance he could get into my loft without me knowing.
I laughed to myself as I opened the fridge and the blaring light flickered once before it turned on. I leaned over and shuffled containers around until I found the orange juice. I pulled it out, stepped back and went to close the fridge with my foot when hands settled on my hips.
I screamed, the juice carton slipping from my grasp and landing on the floor. The orange liquid splattered the stainless steel fridge and pooled at my feet.
My pulse raced and nerves sparked. His scent was magnified a hundred times stronger as he stood directly behind me, his breath a warm caress against the back of my neck. Goose bumps were having a field party.
“Kai.”
“Mmm,” he murmured next to my ear. “Were you expecting someone else?”
The fridge suctioned closed and with it, the light it offered. “No.”
“Good to hear.” His grip tightened on my hips and my breath hitched when one of his fingers slipped beneath the elastic of my boxers and made contact with my skin.
Holy shit. I stopped breathing. Why did I feel something? No, it wasn’t just something. It was my body reacting to his touch, liking his touch.
I swallowed. “My father? You’ll give him the time he needs?”
“Yes.”
“And you won’t hurt him even after he hands over whatever he is working on for you.”
“He won’t be harmed.”
“How do I know you’re telling the truth?” Because the reality was, Kai could tell me anything he wanted and it could all be a lie.
“I told you, I’d never lie. At least not to you.” His finger stroked back and forth over the tiny inch of skin that was exposed to his touch.
“I think you’d say whatever you needed to in order to get what you wanted.”
His chest vibrated against my back as he chuckled and the sound trickled through me like a heated waterfall. “True. But with you… just the truth.” His voice lowered. “Unfortunately, you won’t always like what you hear, braveheart.”
I tensed, heated waterfall gone. “And why am I the lucky one to be honored by your honesty? You don’t know me.” But maybe he did? I had no idea how much Kai knew about me, and he’d saved my life. He’d been at the house that night. He’d somehow made it to the second floor of a burning house and carried me out. No matter how dangerous he was, this man risked his own life to save mine. And it made me feel… secure in his arms. It made me feel protected.
It was such a contradiction. He was a contradiction.
He pushed me forward so my palms lay flat on the cool, smooth surface of the humming fridge. Chilled orange juice pooled between my toes and there was a mild stickiness on my legs where the splatters landed.
“Oh, but I do.”
“You’ve spoken to me once.”
“Perhaps. Yet, I’ve known you for years.”
I tried to turn around, but his hands locked down on my hips hard and he used the fridge and his body to keep me from moving. “Kai?” My voice trembled when I said his name and I knew he had to have heard it.
“Shh.” He ran his hands down my naked arms until his hands curled around my wrists. Then he slid my arms to either side and above my head.
“Kai….”
He pressed his body into mine so I was between the humming fridge and
the heat of his body. It was a weird sensation of the vibrating fridge against my front and his hard warm body against my back.
Holy shit. I could barely breathe and every time I did, my breasts pressed painfully into the hard surface. My head to the side, cheek against the fridge and all I saw of him was the sleeve of his white dress shirt, cuff unbuttoned and rolled once.
“Do you want this?” he asked.
No, my mind screamed and yet my body screamed something else entirely.
“Do you?” he repeated.
“I… I don’t know.” I was confused by my body’s reaction to him. The fear lingered, but since finding out about the fire, it was intermeshed with other emotions.
“If there was no deal, would you want me? Do you want me?” he drawled.
Did I? Yes. I wanted the man who had held me in his arms and told me he’d always come for me. I wanted him. I’d always wanted him. “Yes,” I whispered.
“Good. Then this is day one,” he murmured against the back of my neck as his lips made contact.
“Please. Tell me… I need something to make this… okay.” Nothing would make this okay. I knew that. This was a deal and I was trading my body for my father’s safety to a man who was obviously dangerous.
It was just sex. That was all.
But no matter what I told myself, I knew sex with Kai was more than the act. I felt it the second my body reacted to him and my mind fought him.
He suckled on the lobe of my ear and desire spread like wildfire. “You’re safe with me. Always.”
“And if I don’t believe you?” But the fucked-up part was that I did believe him.
He pulled back slightly, just enough so I no longer had the heat of his body against me, but still felt the closeness. “That’s up to you. But your body trusts me and if there is one thing in life you should trust, it’s your body.”
He released one of my wrists. Brushing my hair aside from my neck, he replaced the touch of his finger with his mouth. His lips trailed a path of gentle, light kisses of heat over my skin and some of the tension left my body.
“What if my body is wrong?” I closed my eyes and curled my hands into fists, unable to move. Afraid to. Wanting to.
“Your body doesn’t know how to be wrong. The only lies are the ones your mind feeds it.”
“I’m scared,” I admitted.
“I’ll make it go away, baby.” He leaned back into me and with him came comforting heat. “Are you wet for me, London?” he whispered.
“Yes.” It was humiliating. Degrading. Because I was wet and it was for a man who was threatening my father. I hated myself, but he was right, my body told the truth.
“Then you have nothing to fear.” He ran his hand down my side while he continued to gently kiss the crook of my neck. “I can’t wait to taste you. The silky wetness on the tip of my tongue, the sweet scent of you as I lick your pussy.”
“Jesus.” I hadn’t meant to say it aloud, but it was erotic. I’d never had any man speak to me that way. My belly swirled and the clench between my thighs ached for what his words declared.
He toyed with the thin strap of my top then kissed the spot, his tongue circling before his teeth nipped, only to ease the pain with his tongue again. He moved to the other shoulder and did the same thing.
The second his hand splayed over my abdomen desire shot through me and I had to clamp down on my lip to stop myself from gasping and arching back into him.
“Don’t hide from me. Show me what you’re feeling.”
I couldn’t. It was a betrayal of who I was. It was wrong. I shouldn’t enjoy any part of it.
His hand slid up beneath my shirt and hesitated just below my breast, his finger trailing a path under the crease. My nipples hurt. They burned for his touch. I burned for his touch.
But he wouldn’t. He moved to the other breast and continued to draw paths of heat just below my breast. I had no control as I curved into him, my head dropping back onto his shoulder.
“Oh, God, Kai.” It slipped out, but I couldn’t help myself. I needed him to end the torture. With the vibration of the fridge and him behind me, his cock pressed into me, his teasing… My body won the battle.
“Yes,” he whispered. His hand cupped my breast, finger flicking over my erect nipple causing my body to shudder. “That’s it. Let me have all of you, London.”
I tensed, jerking my head up straight and he immediately pinched my nipple until I cried out.
“Let go,” he ordered. The pressure on my nipple increased the pleasure, sweet pleasure as he eased the pain with gentle circling.
“I need you right now. I need to sink my cock inside you.” His hand went to the elastic band of my boxer shorts. “And this is the last night you’ll wear clothes to bed.” He backed away for a second while he tugged my boxers down. “Lift.” I lifted one foot then the other. He walked away, and I shifted to turn when he said, “Don’t move.”
It was said with a causal air, another order, yet there was gentleness in his tone. Regardless of how he said it, I wasn’t going to move. I glanced over my shoulder at him and saw him open the cupboard below the sink and toss my boxer shorts into the bin.
His brows rose when he met my eyes as if daring me to object. I didn’t.
I noticed he was wearing jeans with his dress shirt and it almost gave him a sexier appeal. The suit had been sexy, too, but this made him more… approachable, if that were possible. His hand went to the button of his jeans and I heard it pop as he undid it.
I watched as he unzipped them next and the material parted making a V. Shit. A man, a hot sexy man, with snug faded jeans low on his hips was mouthwatering. But add in jeans undone, it was sexy as all hell that surpassed all other levels of hotness.
I had my hands still above my head on the fridge, my bottom half naked, my body tingling with anticipation and a sexy, and yet still scary, man a foot away from me.
A man I knew was dangerous. A man who could hurt my father. A man who I had no misconceptions had killed another human being at some point. But he was also the man who saved me. That I’d dreamed about holding me in his arms. Who had held me in his arms.
“Stop thinking. I know that’s difficult for a brilliant mind like yours.” He smiled and I couldn’t help but admire the beauty in him when he smiled. But I definitely didn’t feel any of my brilliance coming into play when it came to this man.
With each step toward me, his jeans opened a little more and I caught a glimpse of the fine trail of hairs leading down to his cock. When he reached me this time, he didn’t press against me. Instead, he ran his hands down my back to my butt where he squeezed. “Mmm…. Perfect,” he murmured.
I’d been with a few men, but nothing was like this. God, I’d only had sex on the floor and in bed before.
Kai slid his finger down and I stiffened.
“A virgin ass.” It was a statement and the correct one.
His finger circled my sensitive puckered flesh and I was about to wiggle away, but he must have sensed my discomfort because he curved his arm around my waist, keeping me still. “Shh, relax. I won’t go there until you’re ready. And you’re not ready.” He continued to stroke the area until I slowly relaxed. “That’s it.” He trailed his finger down further into the wetness and then back up again.
I moaned. I couldn’t help it as he played with me, my body needing more, aching for it.
I rested my forehead against the fridge as quivers shot through me. I panted with need for him to be inside me. I hated myself for it, but there was no going back. I needed him desperately.
He suddenly grabbed my hips, turned me to face the granite island opposite the fridge and shoved me against it. “Bend over. Hands above your head.”
His hand came down on the back of my neck as if to make sure I followed his orders, but I didn’t need guidance as I lay over the counter, my hands able to just reach the opposite side and curl around the lip.
“You have to use….” I stopped when I heard the pla
stic rip. I peered over my shoulder and saw him rolling on a condom.
He glanced up at me, brows raised. “I’ll always look out for your best interests, London.”
He moved in and I gasped when his cock slid back and forth through my wetness. He kept one hand on my neck, a firm grip with strands of my hair wrapped around his hand.
“I’m going to fuck you. And I want to hear you scream when you come and I won’t stop until you do.” He leaned over me. I couldn’t see his face, but I felt his breath against my ear as he said, “And I can fuck you for a very long time.”
The weight of his body left me, but not his hips as he placed his cock at my entrance. I expected him to thrust hard inside me, but it was agonizingly slow, inch by inch, as if he wanted to savor the first time his cock slid inside me.
My grip on the counter intensified and I bit my lower lip so hard I tasted blood. It was frustrating the way he did it so slowly and yet it was sensual, too. His hand left my neck and slid down my back across to my hip where he tightened his hold. He was deep inside me and hadn’t moved. It gave me a minute to adjust to his size and yet, at the same time, I was sparking with need. A need so intense that I pushed back against him.
“Not yet.” He ground his hips against me in a circular motion, his cock buried deep.
“Yes, yet,” I said.
He chuckled and put his other hand on my hip. His fingers dug into my flesh painfully, perhaps a warning as to what was to come.
And it was.
He pulled out then thrust back into me, hard. Once. He stopped and I waited for him to do it again, but instead, he rotated his hips while sunk deep, his hands keeping me in place.
“Fuck, you feel good.” He glided out then shoved inside again. My fingers curled around the edge of the island kept me in place as he thrust.
In. Out. Hard. Slow. Gentle. Never knowing what was next until my body screamed for him to just fuck me. I throbbed. Pulsed. But when I moaned, that was when his hand came between me and the counter and he played with my clit.
“Oh, God,” I panted. “Kai.”
He groaned and thrust faster, harder to match his finger flicking back and forth. My body trembled and shook until it reached the pinnacle.
