Covering my head in my hands, I dug myself into Gerard’s side. I gave up. That’s what I did. There were too many of them, all gunning for me. I couldn’t fight them. Gerard couldn’t protect me. I would be forced against my will to inhabit an evil spirit. They would tie me down again, but in a different way.
“Shit!” someone yelled. “The cavalry has arrived.”
Gerard’s arms were tight around me. The sound of fighting erupted outside the room. I was expecting the hands of my enemies to grab me at any moment, but they didn’t.
“It’s the team,” Gerard said, pushing me behind him as he thrust forward.
I watched as he punched a warlock in the face. A witch managed to dodge out of the way when he went to grab her. She passed him, coming nearer to me. Placing my boots firmly on the ground, I dared her to come closer with my eyes.
My arms were held up, ready for a fight. She threw her head back and laughed, her expression full of hatred.
“You really think I’d waste time playing fisty cuffs, when I can do this?” Holding her fingers in a claw shape, she grinned to herself when I grabbed my skull as my head exploded in pain. Dropping to the floor, I tried to fight her spell, but it didn’t work.
Glancing up through the hair that had fallen over my face, I heaved a sigh of relief when Gerard slammed his elbow into her head. As she fell to the floor unconscious, the pain eased completely.
Scrambling to my feet as others advanced, I almost shouted in glee when Kalic and Antonia came into the room, a warlock flying into the metallic drawers at the same time.
Wow, the cavalry really had arrived. Although…
“Devon, move!” Gerard shouted as the crawler’s body slunk to the ground, the eyes rolling into the back of the head.
Oh, shit, it had jumped out of the body. Which meant the evil spirit was in the air somewhere, heading straight for me.
Sliding across the floor, I jumped over bodies to try and escape. Justina entered the room, her arm extended high.
“The crawler is out of its body, jumping into…”
Screaming a spell, Justina interrupted my sentence. A bright light illuminated the room, showing the spirit hovering in the air, watching me. As soon as he realised that we could see him, he charged down.
Ducking, I tried to cover myself with a dead witch, but it wasn’t going to work. I was going to be-
“Incendia,” Kurt shouted.
Fire? What the hell was he doing with fire?
“Move, Devon!” Kalic pulled me out from the fallen supernaturals.
I let him manhandle me over to the corner of the room. He stood in front of me as we all watched the crawler. The spirit was on fire, its distorted face stretching, and yet, it wouldn’t die.
“Thunder Hunter’s sword is the only thing that will send it back.”
“Good job I’m here, then,” came a deep voice.
The man was a descendent of the Norse gods. Thor to be exact. And, yet, he’d saved me from the crawler that had jumped into me before.
Trygger, the real name of Thunder Hunter, walked to the centre of the room and thrust his sword into the spirit. Its scream echoed around us, wind and lightning blasting the room.
“Bye bye,” Trygger muttered as the crawler disappeared into thin air.
Silence invaded my ears as every sound left the room. The leftover witches and warlocks had been arrested and taken away.
Justina and Kurt approached Trygger and thanked him. Gerard rushed over to me, checking me over for injuries.
Theresa was standing with Julian, the shapeshifter leader. They chatted amongst themselves. I caught words from my old coven leader about how she’d found out about a plan to take revenge on me for causing so much grief by writing the spell.
My whole body shook as I stayed in my ball against the wall. Kalic and Antonia bent down to talk to me, but I couldn’t really hear what they were saying. It was my fault. Everything was my fault. If I’d had known that I was channelling my ancestors when I was a child, I would’ve never become an agent. I was evil. Using the ley lines to connect to the dead to create evil spells was classed as going against pure magic.
“How am I still alive?” I muttered to Gerard when he held my face in his palms.
“I have no bloody idea,” he muttered as he picked me up and cradled me against him. “But, you’re fine. I promise you, you’re fine.”
Chapter Eleven
The knock on the door brought me from a happy dream, a dream where I was getting down and dirty with Mr Gerard Freshwater.
“Devon?”
Oh, and there was his voice. So deep, so raw. And, so loud in my ear. Who said he could come in?
“What?” I muttered from under the covers.
If the sound of rattling cutlery had anything to say about what he was doing, he’d better have a big ‘ole English breakfast with him.
Thrusting the covers off me, I glared at him when I noticed the bowl of oats. “Porridge? Really?”
Tugging the cover back over me, I huddled into myself. I wasn’t getting up for porridge. It was boring.
“You’ve got your therapy appointment in two hours. I thought we could do a workout beforehand.”
My mind instantly went to the dream I’d been having. That was my kind of workout.
It had been three days since the whole agency, plus the leaders of the underworld, had come to my rescue. Thunder Hunter had quickly disappeared into his hiding hole, like usual. He was an acquaintance, that I very rarely saw, but I was pleased to see him the night he sent the dark crawler back to hell.
“Get up, Mrs Lazybones.”
“Mrs?” I said, moving very slowly to sit up. “I’m Miss, thank you very much. No one’s put a ring on it yet.”
The quirk of his eyebrow made me smile as he handed me the bowl of gunge. Ugh. He had nursed me since our ordeal at the hospital, blaming himself for letting me lead him astray. Justina and Kurt had berated us, upset that we’d gone against their wishes, yet again. In fact, we were both on a warning.
“You get me into all sorts of trouble,” I said, gingerly taking a bite of the food. “Nope, this won’t do.”
Shoving the bowl on the bedside table, I jumped out of bed and stretched my arms high. “You, Gerard, are treating me to a fry up at the café.”
His gaze was stuck on my face, his eyes wide, worried. What was wrong with him? He’d seen me in my nightclothes before. Glancing down at myself, I stared. Er. Okay, my boob had decided to slip out of my nightdress and sit on top of it, winking over the edge.
Spinning, I slapped a hand over my mouth at the same time as tucking myself away. Mortifying was not the word. In fact, there wasn’t a word to describe how abysmally embarrassed I was.
Gerard cleared his throat. “So, do you realise how close you came to being possessed again the other night?”
Laughter escaped before I could pull it back. Turning, I shook my head at him. “Firstly, we pretend that never happened. Secondly, you don’t try to cover it up with something that I’m in therapy for.”
Flushed cheeks turned even redder as he tried not to smile. The lift of his lip made me raise my eyebrows.
“I mean it.” He turned serious, the hilarity instantly gone. Ah, I thought I’d diverted Serious Mac-therapist. Alas, it seemed not. “You’re joking around a lot, almost brushing it off. And, yet, I can’t get it out of my head.”
Sitting on the end of the bed, I patted the space next to me. Kingsley squeaked, reminding me of his presence. Blowing him a kiss, I hoped it would placate him for the moment. I had to have this discussion with Gerard, there was no avoiding it.
“You think that I don’t trust you to take care of me.”
His chest heaved before he came over, sitting a few inches away from me. Keeping his distance. Holding his arm up, he pointed at the bare skin above his elbow.
“Have you noticed that there are no new tattoos, even though I killed some bad guys the other night?”
Frowning,
I stroked his skin, jumping when an electric shock stung us both. “I hadn’t noticed. Why didn’t you get the numbers? You killed at least six people.”
The wince on his face made me watch him closely. Was he starting to feel something?
“You’ve taught me that I don’t need to keep a tally. I need to forgive myself.” His gaze was stuck to the plush carpet under our feet.
Wringing my hands on my lap, I watched my small fingers as they turned white. “I did. And, you do.”
We were in our own little worlds as we spoke, staring so that we didn’t have to look at one another.
“Well, I’ve been working on that. And… I want you to work on it too.”
Huh? What was he talking about? There was no one in my life I needed to forgive.
“Firstly, your parents.”
Ah, okay, maybe there was. I couldn’t deny that even though I was trying, there was still a bit of my inner child who blamed them for my grandma issues.
“Secondly, yourself.”
“Myself? Why do I need to forgive myself?”
His head turned sideways to look at me. The expression on his face was blank, almost hard. “For not living up to your own expectations. I hear the way you speak about yourself to people. You judge yourself for the trouble you have with magic. Instead of being strong in who you are, you hold yourself back because of what you’re not. You want to be a complete witch, you probably wish you were the only full female warlock. You need to embrace who you are now.”
Getting to his feet when I tutted in dismissal, Gerard stood looking down at me.
“See? You won’t hear me. No, you’re not a full warlock. And, you’re not a full Essex witch. Fuck me, Devon, you’re as unique as they can get, but you want to fit in with the crowd. Why is that?”
Heat seared my veins as he rained judgement down on me. Lunging from my place, I came face to chest with him. Tipping my head so I could see his eyes, I stared him down.
“How dare you say all those things? I’m not weak. Well, I am, but still. Anyway, you can’t give me a lecture about all that shit when you’re fucked up too.”
He raised an infuriating eyebrow. My whole body shook with barely contained rage. If he wasn’t careful, he would get a fire ball up the arse.
“Sorry, uncalled for. Still… I… I…” The anger suddenly drained from me as the realisation sunk in. “I just want to be loved. And, when you stand out from the crowd, people don’t want to get too close.”
Gerard’s tongue ran around the inside of his teeth, his expression suddenly heating up. My heartbeat raised, spiking high as my mouth parted slightly and his gaze zoned in on the movement of my tongue as it wet my dry lips.
“Don’t look at me like that,” he whispered.
The tattoos on his arms moved as he clenched his muscles. Was he trying to stop himself from reaching out?
Biting my bottom lip, I took a step forward. “I can’t.”
That was the breaking point. Gerard surged forward, grabbed me by the waist and lifted me. My legs wrapped around his waist as our lips clashed. Tongues danced together, breath intertwined.
Putting my arms around his neck, I held him tightly as he walked us towards the bed.
“I can’t hold out anymore.” He panted as I bit his lip. “Ouch.”
Laughing, I shook my head. “Me neither.”
Between nips and licks, we made it to the bed. My dream was about to become reality. I would savour every moment of him. Every single-
“You’re driving me crazy, woman.”
Oh, all he had to do was keep telling me things like that. I was his already. Something had grown between us. No, not that… And, I couldn’t ignore it anymore. Yes, okay, that, too.
Falling against the bed, I sunk into the soft material, loving the feel of him against me. His whole body stretched over my small frame, and yet, I felt powerful, not weak.
Running my hands through his hair, I tugged it up, pulling his mouth away from mine so I could look into his eyes. The green irises sparkled as he grinned down at me, totally wanting me as much as I wanted him.
“I’ve dreamt about this,” I muttered, tracing my tongue down his jaw.
Shuddering, he nodded. “Me, too.”
“No, literally last night.” The giggles that filled the room made Kingsley squeak.
Thrusting up, I paused our shenanigans. “Gerard,” I whispered as he dug his head under my hair and ran his tongue around my ear. “Kingsley cannot see this.”
His chest moved with his chuckle as he removed my nightie, leaving me almost naked. Throwing it over Kingsley’s cage, he winked at me. “All better. Much better.”
Touching me, tasting me, he was going to send me over the edge too soon. Tugging his shirt off, I stroked his torso. There weren’t many men who had the sexy hip bone muscles, but as I traced my finger down one, I had to roll my shoulders to contain the thrill that ran through me.
“Just think,” Gerard said as he kissed me again. “Once you’re off the case, you can practice your magic and totally harness both. We could do some freaky magic things in bed.”
Freezing, I pushed him away. The warmth that had radiated only moments before fizzled out. Covering myself, I looked at him. “What do you mean, off the case?”
Frowning, he sat up but didn’t back away. “Don’t you think it’s best that you’re not involved? You’ve got way too much emotional involvement now.”
“I’m going to therapy to sort that. I assumed I’d be back on the case once I was done with that. I won’t rest until she’s dead.”
The mood had changed extremely quickly. The coldness that crept over my skin made me swallow the lump in my throat. Gerard hadn’t said anything about love. He had jumped on me, although I had encouraged him, but did he just want me for one thing?
It was a good job I had found out what he really thought before we’d had sex. Once we’d gone all the way, there would be no going back.
“What was all that crap earlier? About forgiveness and not being weak?”
Shuffling back, he sat on the edge of the bed, clearly understanding that I wasn’t going to sleep with him anytime soon. “You’re not weak,” he said through clenched teeth. “You’re reactive, which is no good in our line of work.”
Biting the inside of my cheek, I tried to prove him wrong. I couldn’t.
Getting up, I grabbed the nearest clothes I could find. Jeans and the top from the day before, and my boots.
“Where are you going? Don’t leave like this. Not when that just happened.”
Reaching the door, I looked over my shoulder. “You might as well pretend this never happened. I’m not going to be with anyone who doesn’t think I’m fit enough to be professional. You might think you know me, Gerard, and yes, I’ve been having a few flashback problems recently, but I’m going to prove you wrong.”
Chapter Twelve
Everyone was against me, even the man I was in… lust with.
My parents had pressed Gerard’s point when I had tried to get them to hear me out. Justina had also expressed a wish that I keep on with the therapy and see where it led. Which meant they were going to kick me off the case.
My feet were strong on the ground as I approached the guard and flashed my badge. Nodding once, he allowed me entrance, not even bothering to check the hefty bag I had slung over my shoulder. Ah, well, at least one person still trusted me.
The prison walls were infused with a spell that disarmed all magic. And, yet, an agent got a pass. My magic was recognised by the spell, so I could still use it.
As the cell door squeaked open, I couldn’t help but feel a little sorry for the person who sat on the side of the bed, her hair hanging down where she leant over.
“Lucia?”
Tilting her head to the side, she looked at me through those lovely dark locks. Even with a swollen face, and bruised eye, she was pretty. How did she do it?
“What do you want?”
Either this would work
, or it would backfire and cause me all sorts of grief. Stepping into the cell, I closed the door behind me.
Lucia’s eyes widened when I lowered the bag to the floor and opened it.
“I need your help.”
Taking Sammy, the cat, out of the bag, I cradled the familiar to me, holding tightly when she squirmed to get to her owner.
“Give her to me.” Lucia was on her feet in a flash, reaching forward.
Moving Sammy, I held up a finger. “I need your help,” I repeated.
Putting her hands on her hips, Lucia glared at me. There was no reason that she should aid me. Not when I’d beaten her senseless. And, yet, the longing in her face almost made me cave in. Sammy was to her what Kingsley was to me. A best friend.
“What do you want?”
Hissing when Sammy scratched my arm, I handed her over. The little sod had drawn blood. Felines could be vicious, which was why I’d chosen my rat.
Rubbing the wound, I watched as Lucia hugged the cat to her, a genuine smile coming to her face. It was the first time I’d seen real emotion since she’d been in custody.
“I need to find a way to contact my grandmother. I’ve been thrown off the case.” Okay, I lied, but it was going to be true in the future. “And, I want to reacquaint myself with her.”
Lucia’s eyes zoned in on me, the brown irises diluting, judging. “I don’t believe you.”
Throwing my head back, I groaned. Why was everything so difficult lately?
“I’m being serious. No one wants me at the agency,” I spat. “They all think I’ve lost it since she tortured me. I need to see her. Ask her why she thought I was so special.”
Shaking her head, Lucia sat on her bed. “Oh, I see. You’re feeling rejected by everyone because you’ve lost yourself, so you’re running to grandma. Just to get attention.”
When she put it like that, it did sound immature. In fact, what was I doing? Why was I seeking out the one person who I wanted to end? It was completely childish.
“You’re right,” I said to myself.
“No, don’t be so hasty. I know exactly why you’re seeking her. She knew you when you were growing up. Accepted you, even though she knew you were part warlock. She taught you how to use Essex witch magic, even training you to connect to part of the ley lines.” Lucia’s face was blank as she spoke, as if she wasn’t really there.
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