‘About what?’ she asked, her blue eyes coldly hostile. ‘About the fact that you don’t love me, never have and never will? That our marriage is a sham and Ethan is stuck in the middle? Is that what you want to talk about? Do you have a magic recipe to put everything right? I don’t think so. You and I are finished, Adam. I’ll soon be out of your hair.’
His nostrils flared as he stared at her for several long condemning seconds. ‘And Ethan?’
‘You’ll have rights.’ She noticed that he didn’t say anything about her leaving, it was only Ethan who concerned him. Just as she had thought.
‘Rights be damned! Ethan is not leaving this house. I’ve lost enough years already.’ His eyes were cold and condemning, his chin tilted arrogantly, the cleft beneath his lips clearly defined. He was firmly of the belief that he could make this happen.
Sienna thought otherwise. ‘If you really expect me to stay here, locked into a loveless marriage, Adam, you’re crazy.’
Jutting black brows gathered fiercely together. ‘We can work at it, for Ethan’s sake.’
‘Let’s leave Ethan out of this.’ Sienna kept her back ramrod straight, her eyes declaring war. Her chestnut hair was tousled where she had raked her fingers through it, but she did not care what she looked like. There was no way that she was going to give in. Her mind was made up.
She was leaving him.
And Ethan was going with her.
‘How can we leave him out of it when he is a part of both of us?’ Adam’s voice had never been stronger. It was like steel and Sienna shivered as a chill ran down her spine. ‘I will not stand by and let you take him from me.’
She would need to be careful. It had been wrong to tell him that she was planning to leave because he would now watch her like a hawk. She heaved a sigh. ‘I guess I wasn’t thinking straight.’
‘Indeed you weren’t.’ Gruffness filled Adam’s voice. ‘We don’t have to sleep together, Sienna, if you cannot face that, but Ethan has to be our main consideration.’
‘Of course,’ she said quietly, looking down at her feet, not wanting him to see that she was lying through her teeth.
‘Then I will say no more.’
She had half hoped that Adam would go back to his apartment after their argument. It could actually work if they lived that way. She and Ethan in this house, Adam in his apartment. Then Ethan could see his father frequently and she would be happy with him out of her hair.
But dared she even suggest it? Or would the fact that she would still be forced to see him periodically make matters worse?
She guessed plan number one was the best. She had already warned her mother to expect her.
Happily Adam did not know in which part of Ireland her mother lived. And if he tried to find her it would be like looking for a needle in a haystack. She would be perfectly safe.
On the day they left she waited until Adam had gone to work before she packed their clothes and a few of Ethan’s toys, telling him that they were going to Ireland to visit his grandmother.
‘How about Daddy?’ he asked.
Not wanting to tell him an outright lie, Sienna said, ‘Daddy has his work, he can’t come with us.’
‘But I will see him again soon?’
‘Of course you will,’ she assured him. Though she did not know how long it would be before she allowed that to happen. The way she was feeling at this moment it would be a very long time.
It wasn’t being fair on Ethan, she knew that, and she didn’t want him to forget about Adam altogether. They had had such a short time together it wasn’t really fair on him, or Adam either. But how could she stay under the circumstances? It still made her hackles rise every time she recalled that he had married her simply to get one up on his grandfather. What sort of a man would do a thing like that? Had he ever meant to tell her, or had he planned to go through his whole life keeping it a secret?
There would come a time when they would need to see each other again, perhaps when she wasn’t so angry, but meanwhile Ethan would be happy living in a new place with his grandmother. He’d have all sorts of new things to do, places to explore.
She had told them at the nursery school, though she hadn’t said exactly where they were going as she did not want anyone passing the information on to Adam. And she had hired a taxi to take them to the airport, rather than using his driver. They were taking a flight to Dublin and she had paid cash for everything so that Adam could not track her movements. The account he had opened for her was the one thing she could thank him for. For once she did not have to worry about money.
Although Ethan had been fretful when they were leaving the house, excitement soon took over when he found out that he was going on a plane. ‘Wow, Mummy!’ he exclaimed when they reached the airport. ‘Are we going on Daddy’s plane? Is he coming with us?’
Sienna frowned. ‘Daddy’s plane?’
‘Yes, he told me about it, he promised to take me on a ride one day if I was very good.’
This was the first Sienna had heard about it but she was not surprised. Whatever money could buy, Adam seemed to have. In her opinion it hadn’t made him into a better person, though. He had ridden roughshod over her, buying the house, insisting they move in, spoiling Ethan terribly with all the presents he bought. Every night there was something different. It wasn’t good for her son.
And Adam wasn’t good for her!
‘Well, we’re not going on Daddy’s plane today.’
Sienna suddenly realised how sharply she had spoken and softened her voice. ‘We’re going on a much bigger one. This is the biggest adventure of your life, Ethan.’
His little face split into a wide smile. ‘Thank you, Mummy. And when Daddy comes, I’ll be able to tell him all about it.’
‘You certainly will,’ she answered, grimacing inside, wishing that his hopes were not so high. Deep down she hated what she was doing to him. But for her own sanity she had to get away. She could not carry on living with a man who didn’t love her, who had never loved her.
During their wait at the airport Sienna constantly looked over her shoulder and it was not until they were on the plane that she was able to relax.
When they reached Dublin her mother was waiting. Sienna had tears in her eyes as they hugged. It wasn’t until she had had Ethan that she had realised the power of a mother and child relationship. It was a bond too strong to break, and they hadn’t seen enough of each over the years.
‘And look at you, Ethan,’ said his grandmother, folding him into her arms. ‘How you have grown.’
‘I’m four and a half,’ said Ethan importantly.
‘And do you go to school?’
‘Yes.’
‘Then you must tell me all about it when we get home.’
Home was a cottage on the coast. It was an hour and a half’s drive away from Dublin and Sienna had never seen anywhere look more welcoming or peaceful. This was exactly what she needed. Somewhere remote, somewhere where Adam would never find them. What little bit of guilt she felt for taking Ethan away from him she quickly forgot once they settled in.
Her mother was a good-looking woman in her forties with blonde hair and grey eyes, still as slender as she had been in her teens, and was clearly happy with her life here.
Her husband, Niall, was an artist and had a studio at the bottom of the garden. He specialised in seascapes and Sienna could not think of a better place for an artist to live and work.
Ethan was fascinated with all the brushes and paints and poor Niall was soon being bombarded with questions, leaving Sienna time alone with her mother.
‘Is there something wrong?’ asked Anne. ‘I didn’t want to question you before but as soon as you said you’d like to come and stay with us I couldn’t help wondering.’
Sienna sighed, a heavy sigh that lifted her chest before relaxing again. ‘I went to see Ethan’s father.’
Anne’s pale eyebrows rose. ‘And?’
‘We moved in together.’
‘I
see. I take it it’s not working out?’
‘Not at all,’ declared Sienna, shaking her head. ‘I thought he deserved to know about Ethan, but it was a mistake. Marrying him was a mistake. The biggest one I’ve ever made. Bigger than agreeing to move in with him again.’
Anne took her daughter’s hands in hers. ‘We all make mistakes, darling. It’s how we deal with them that counts. Is running away the best solution, do you think? I met mine head on. I divorced your father. Why have you never wanted a divorce from Adam? Do you still love him?’
It took Sienna a long time to answer, and then all she said was, ‘I don’t know.’ There were times when she did and times when she didn’t. It was like riding a roller-coaster. There were so many ups and downs that she couldn’t keep count.
‘Which means you do still love him,’ said her mother sagely. ‘Otherwise it would have been a definite no.’
Adam was anxious to get home. As each day had passed and Sienna had still been there, he had counted his blessings. When she had announced that she and Ethan were going to walk out on him he had felt raw, as though he had been cut wide open. It had felt like salt being rubbed into a wound. And it had hurt like hell.
Thank goodness he had persuaded her to stay. He wanted her at his side for the rest of his life. He needed to be patient, though. He shouldn’t have told her about his grandfather. It had been an insane thing to do. And now he had to find some way of making amends.
Simply telling her that he loved her wouldn’t do. She wouldn’t believe him, she would think that he was saying it to try and get her back into his bed. Which wasn’t his main reason at all, even though it was one he would certainly enjoy. The nights had been hellish without her.
The house was quiet. Too quiet! It was too early for Ethan to be in bed, so where were they? Suspicion built in him and he raced up the stairs, taking them two at a time, calling out their names at the same time.
Her room was neat and tidy—and empty! The same with Ethan’s. He snatched open wardrobe doors and saw nothing but more emptiness!
His heart slammed down into his feet.
She had gone! Despite her promise, she had left him. She had taken Ethan, his precious son, and they had gone God knew where.
In that split second Adam wanted to sit down and cry. He wanted to drop his head in his hands and sob. Nothing had ever made him feel like this before.
Chapter Thirteen
ADAM had had no idea that Sienna was still planning to leave. He should have been more alert. He thought that he had persuaded her to stay. How wrong could he be?
‘I will not stand by and let you take him from me.’ His own words came back to haunt him.
‘I wasn’t thinking straight.’
‘Indeed you weren’t. We don’t have to sleep together, Sienna, but Ethan has to be our main consideration.’
‘Of course.’
‘Then I will say no more.’
She had looked truly contrite and he had been satisfied. He thought that she was of the same opinion as him, that Ethan needed both his parents.
And now she had gone!
Without leaving a single clue!
The first thing he did was try her mobile phone, but it was switched off. Every time he tried it, it was off. Then he phoned Maria, but he drew a blank there as well. It was her day off, he should have known. Sienna had cleverly waited until she knew that no one would see her leave.
He went to see Jo. Sienna’s old neighbour was as shocked as he to hear that Sienna had run away. ‘I’ve not heard from her. I thought she was happy with you.’
‘So did I,’ he growled. ‘Have you any idea where she might have gone?’
Jo shrugged. ‘Not really. Anywhere, I suppose.’
Which was no answer at all! ‘Does she have other friends?’
‘I don’t think so. She’s never mentioned anyone special.’
Adam felt that he was getting nowhere fast and his blood pressure was rising. How could Sienna do this to him? And, more importantly, to Ethan? It was unfair on both of them.
Did she really hate him that much that she couldn’t bear living with him any more? He shouldn’t, of course, have told her the real reason he had married her. It had been a fatal mistake, a damning admission, and had damaged their relationship further.
But hadn’t he shown her recently that he loved her? Surely she must have picked up on it? Did it matter what had happened in the past? Wasn’t the present more important?
He realised how little he knew about Sienna. He had, by his own insensitive behaviour, sent her running. He felt terribly guilty. Everything was his fault. Every damn thing! And now he hadn’t a clue where to start looking.
He checked her bank account and discovered that she had drawn out a huge amount of cash but paid nothing by cheque or on her card. He even checked Ethan’s school in case Sienna had told them the reason she had pulled him out, perhaps left a forwarding address. But to no avail. So what did he do now? The driver he had put at her disposal said he hadn’t been asked to take her anywhere—which meant she must have called a taxi.
She was clever. She had left no clues whatsoever.
By this time Adam was pulling his hair out. Sleep became impossible. How could he sleep without knowing where Sienna and Ethan were? And where did he begin his search? Because if he had to search every inch of the country, he would do so. Unless she had gone abroad, gone as far away from him as she could. Hadn’t she once said something about a distant relative in Australia? He groaned.
The thought that she had put as much space between them as she could cut deep. It stopped him breathing. It was like a knife turning in a wound. If that was the case, it would be impossible to find her.
Except that nothing was impossible! He would check all the airports. See if she had been booked on any flight.
Didn’t her mother live in Ireland? He was sure that she’d once mentioned it, many years ago when they had first met. Maybe they had gone there? He felt a brief glimmer of hope. As far as he knew, they never saw each other but where else would she go? Would it be a wild-goose chase? He had no address, nothing. He racked his brains to try and recall whether Sienna had ever dropped a clue. But he drew a blank.
Sienna was constantly on her guard, afraid that Adam would discover her whereabouts and come after her like a raging bull. She had done all she could to cover her tracks but was aware that Adam would leave no stone unturned.
Ethan, on the other hand, was in his element, learning to paint. Sienna was actually quite proud of him. He seemed to have a natural talent, which Niall said should be nurtured. He naturally kept asking where his father was, and Sienna’s answer was always the same. ‘Any day soon, my darling, you’ll see him. Don’t forget Daddy’s a very busy man.’
She tried to ignore her own aching heart. Despite everything, despite vowing to hate Adam for the rest of her life, there was no hiding the fact that she was still crazily in love with him. Her wise mother had been right. There were times when she even wondered whether they ought to go back, whether putting space between them was worth all the heartache.
It was then that she had to remind herself that Adam wanted only his son—not her, never her. She was someone to be used in bed! Making love was magical, she was able to forget everything in those moments, but was it enough? Enough to survive on for the rest of her life, or at least until Ethan was grown up and left home?
Her heart simply couldn’t take the pain.
‘Adam!’
‘Peter! What are you doing here?’ The last person Adam had expected to see was Peter Wain wright. He had been in Ireland for two days but so far hadn’t been able to pick up Sienna’s trail. She had definitely flown to Dublin, that was as much as he knew. But no one remembered seeing a beautiful chestnut-haired Englishwoman with a young, dark-haired son.
Peter was a long-time business acquaintance who he sometimes met socially. He had even been at their wedding.
‘Business, old boy. And I guessed you mu
st be somewhere around because I saw Sienna yesterday.’
Adam went very still. He even stopped breathing. But he gave nothing away. ‘She never mentioned seeing you. Where was that?’
Peter smiled. ‘She didn’t notice me, she was too engrossed in your son. You’re a dark horse, Adam, you never told me you had a boy. I assume he is yours? He’s fine looking without a doubt.’
‘Of course he’s mine.’ Adam was swift to confirm it. Not many people outside his own immediate circle even knew that he’d been separated from his wife. But why hadn’t Peter answered his question? He did not want to give away the fact that he was here looking for them, but he was anxious to find out where they were.
‘They were going into that grocery shop down the road. Are you living here now?’
‘Goodness, no,’ answered Adam. ‘We’re visiting Sienna’s mother.’
As soon as they had parted company Adam went into the shop in question and when he came out he was smiling.
‘It’s Daddy!’
‘Don’t be silly, Ethan, it can’t be your daddy. He would tell us if he was coming.’ Nevertheless, Sienna felt her heart miss a beat before starting to hammer alarmingly.
‘But it is, Mummy.’ Before she could stop him Ethan had run out of the house and down the path. ‘Daddy, Daddy!’ he cried, and threw himself into Adam’s arms.
Through the window Sienna saw Adam swing Ethan up and hold him close. She saw their happiness. Complete happiness. And in that instant realised how selfish she had been in keeping Ethan away from the father he had only just got to know. The father he loved with all of his dear little heart.
She had thought only of herself, and her hurt. She had ignored what she was doing to their son.
How Adam had found them was a mystery. He wore a black cotton shirt and jeans and looked relaxed, as though he was on holiday. And yet she knew that he would be far from relaxed. He had obviously been hell bent on finding them and with his determination had left no stone unturned. Though goodness knows what had brought him to this tiny corner of Ireland so quickly. Somehow, some way, she must have left a clue.
Married Again to the Millionaire Page 14
