by Maria Lima
I shifted position on the couch, lying on my side, propped up on one arm. “Tucker's right, Bea. Low profile is the key, for vampires, too, no doubt. If there's someone at the Wild Moon we need to check out, I can take Adam up on the dinner invite. Give me a chance to sniff around a little, see what I can find out."
"Girlfriend, I'm not so sure you ought to go sniffing around that man for anything more than a good meal ... or a good time,” said Bea with a smile. “Leave the Nancy Drew-ing to Sheriff-man. If the idiot brothers and your cousin were involved, let Carlton deal."
I blushed and didn't want to look at my brother, who I knew was grinning bigger than the Cheshire Cat. Unlike me, Tucker didn't have any qualms about dating humans—of either sex. I was sure he thought my having a little hanky-panky with Adam Walker was just what the doctor ordered. But then again, Tucker had always been careful to stick to humans who cared little for permanence. Most of his real relationships had been with clan.
"Bea, Carlton's not going looking for the same things. I need to do this."
At this, my brother guffawed. I glared at him. He just smirked at me and drank his wine.
Bea scowled at Tucker. “Keira, I know, but look at what just happened to you just a little while ago. What if you start to freak out when you're out at the ranch? Maybe both you and Tucker ought to go to dinner. It's safer."
"No way. I am not going to drag my brother to dinner as a chaperon. Come on, Bea, you know me better than that."
I turned to my brother. “And don't you even get started on any of this. This is out of your territory, brother mine."
I shot him a look. It was bad enough that Bea was interfering, I didn't need my brother to chime in.
Tucker snickered and poured himself another glass of wine. “Far be it for me to interfere in my sister's love life."
Thing was, Bea was probably right. Considering what I'd been feeling toward Adam, if the opportunity arose, I might just start thinking with my hormones and not my head and who knew where that could lead?
My friend smiled. “Okay, go. Talk, eat dinner, get all couple-y.” She tossed me the cordless phone. “But that's all, right? No matter how guapo that man is, you need to be careful. You can worry about getting laid later."
Her grin widened as she watched my brother's face. He was trying not to laugh. “Besides, this'll be a good chance for you to think about something other than Marty. Let Carlton do his job. You go out there and de-stress. Nothing better than a fabulous dinner, fantastic wine and something chocolate for dessert."
I felt my face turn red. All I could think of was Adam's voice, rich and dark and tempting as the finest Belgian chocolate. I knew that's not what Bea meant, but I blushed anyway. Okay, then, this would be an exercise in some serious self-control.
* * * *
The phone rang twice before he picked up. His voice, still as smooth as the anticipated chocolate dessert, sounded a little fuzzy, distant.
"Hello, Keira Kelly,” he said. “I heard you called. Does this mean I get to pay you back with dinner?"
Whoever said paybacks are hell was so very wrong. Then again, maybe their idea of hell didn't match mine.
"Yes, I'm taking you up on your offer of dinner,” I said. “I'm sorry, though, did I just wake you up? Was that why you didn't answer the phone earlier?"
"You caught me out,” he said, his voice clearing. “I was napping and asked not to be disturbed, but that's fine. I'm glad you called. If I remember rightly, you're a bit of a night owl yourself."
"You remember rightly. So ... what's good for you?"
His deep laugh vibrated through the phone. “I'd answer that, but I'm sure it would get me in trouble."
Damn it, I'd meant the time for dinner. I felt myself turning red as I imagined the grin on his face. I couldn't even look at Bea or Tucker.
But Adam got me off the hook before I totally made a fool of myself. “Would tomorrow at nine be okay?"
"Sounds great,” I answered. “Where should I meet you?"
"Just drive through to my house,” he said. “You can park here and we can walk over to the restaurant. Hang on a second.” He was back nearly immediately with the security code for the gate. “Do you have any preferences on types of food? I have an ‘in’ with the chef.” I could hear the smile in his voice.
"I'm not that picky,” I said with a laugh.
"See you tomorrow then, Keira,” he said. “I'm looking forward to it."
"Yeah, me, too."
It occurred to me I wasn't just spouting pleasantries. I really was looking forward to this, despite everything that happened today. Tomorrow night, I could relax and enjoy a nice dinner out with a very attractive man. It would be a great chance to escape for a few hours, to forget, if only temporarily. Dinner with Adam Walker certainly had other possibilities. I could certainly contemplate enjoying a little more than just a meal.
Relief suddenly flooded my overstressed body. I let go the tension I'd been clutching like a not-so-comforting blanket, feeling it slip from me, taking my tightly-held shields with it.
It was like a smudged film had suddenly been stripped from my awareness. I felt Bea's breathing across the room, a tangible current of air moving around me, the heat of her body nearly solid, as if I could see it, feel it. My brother's breath was heavier than hers, more solid, tasting of earth, of musk, of the woods and of blood. His energy burned red, gold, white with the changing swirl that was shapeshifter.
The leather of the couch caressed my skin, even through the thick fabric of my jeans; the nubbly softness of the chenille cushions stroked my back and sides. A burst of light and dark speared my eyes.
"Holy shit!” I fell against the couch cushions. The handset fell out of my nerveless hand to the floor.
"Keira, are you okay?"
"Bea, wait, don't—"
Before Tucker could stop her, Bea put a cool hand on my forehead. I cringed at the touch. Tucker squatted next to her, gently moving her hand off me. I felt the heat of his hand hovering above my face.
"I'm fine, just, please, don't touch me right now."
Bea scooted back to the easy chair Tucker had just vacated, curling deeper into the seat. “I'm sorry; I was just trying to help.” Her voice was small and tight, holding in the hurt I knew she was feeling.
Tucker stayed next to me, concern on his face. He was careful not to touch me. He was too close.
"Tucker, please, move back a little."
He nodded, and moved back over by Bea, perching on the ottoman.
"I'm sorry,” I said to both of them, struggling to keep the thin hold I had on what was left of my safeguards. “Something's happened. My shields are gone ... everything's pretty raw right now."
"I felt them go,” Tucker said. “What happened?"
"I don't know,” I said. “When I hung up, I relaxed, then—"
"Your shields were gone."
I nodded. “Yeah."
Bea's eyes welled up with tears. I could feel her emotion brimming to the surface, empathy, pity, a little fear. I could taste her worry, rich on my tongue, her anxiety hovering just above the feeling of relief that I seemed to be okay. The heat of her body temperature flooded over me, covering me like a second skin.
I huddled into myself, pulling together the last shreds of my tattered barriers until I could block enough of her energy to speak coherently. Tucker had known how to react, he'd reinforced his own shields the second he felt mine going, blocking himself from me.
"I don't know what happened,” I said. “I felt something, power, maybe. I saw...” I didn't really know what. I'd flashed on blood and death and hunger. I felt the need deep inside me, clawing its way out, desperate for release. But I couldn't tell if that was just remnants of my previous vision, or if this was a new invasion of my sanity.
"It was like a rush of power,” I finished, knowing it was a lame answer.
It had been more than that. As I'd stupidly relaxed my shields, they'd slipped completely away, leaving m
e raw and open to everything around me. I'd touched the night and it had touched me back. But it wasn't anything I could explain. There weren't any words to give meaning to what had happened. Like someone tripping on acid, I'd felt colors and smelled light, felt the energies of everything that ever hunted in the dark.
Bea sat facing me, both knees drawn up to her chin. Her arms were wrapped around her legs.
"I'm sorry. I freaked you out, didn't I?"
"Yeah, you freaked me out, chica."
She frowned a little. “Are you going to be okay?"
Before I said anything I took a deep breath and let it out slowly.
"Yeah, I'll be fine. I wasn't careful.” I mentally thanked the powers that be that I hadn't done that in front of anyone else. At least my friend understood—sort of.
"Damn it, girl,” Bea said. “I thought you'd learned that lesson.” Okay, well, she was my best friend. She was allowed to scold.
"Tell me about it.” I was tired of complications. I was beginning to feel that fate, or karma or whatever, was stirring this particular piece of my life with a delicately evil hand. Why the hell couldn't everything just stay simple?
"Keira?” Bea's worry echoed throughout the room. Damn it, my shields were still too fragile. Her emotions still leaked through.
"Sorry, just trying to maintain."
"She'll be okay, Bea.” Tucker's voice was soft and comforting. “It's just ... a little unsettling."
Unsettling was a good word. Trying to maintain my stability was something that seemed to be getting harder and harder to do over the past day or two. My senses kept freaking out, my natural controls didn't seem so natural anymore, and it was way too easy for me to get sidetracked with emotion. I knew it was probably a side-effect of my changing energies, but knowing it and being able to do something about it was altogether something different. Time to cancel my dinner date. I couldn't risk losing control while I was with Adam.
I picked up the handset, which had fallen between my feet.
"What are you doing?” Bea sat up straight.
"Calling Adam back and telling him the date's off."
Bea moved as fast as any human could and pulled the cord out of the wall before I could even dial. She hadn't had to move far. The main phone unit was on the table next to her. Lucky her. She'd caught me by surprise and done the one thing I hadn't expected. Damn her, she knew me much too well.
"What are you doing, m'hija?” she asked. “Are you nuts?"
"I'm not, I'm sane—totally calm and completely in control of myself for the first time since yesterday."
Who was I kidding? I was running scared. Scared of possibilities that were so vague they didn't even have a name. I wanted to see Adam, but I was afraid that all that emotion was what was loosening my control. I hadn't planned on having to deal with this kind of physical attraction to anyone, especially not with a human. But here I was and there he was and damnitalltohellandback. This was not getting me anywhere.
"Keira, stop and think.” Bea was insistent. “You cannot pass this up. Isn't this an ideal situation for you?"
I stayed where I was. “What?"
"Adam Walker. He's gorgeous, rich, no complications. He's not Carlton and he's not Gideon. You don't need to worry about anything more than dinner. Just relax and enjoy, ask questions ... you'll be fine."
"She's right, Keira.” Tucker chimed in, having wisely kept his counsel until now. “Just say ‘yes'."
I glared at him for making with the stupid jokes. He was one to talk. After all, Bea had only seen me lose control once. Tucker was there both times in less than a few hours.
"Really, Keira, I think it's okay,” he said. “You're just stressed. Too much happening. That's why you lost control. You have until tomorrow night. It'll be okay."
"All right, you win,” I said, capitulating. “I'll go to dinner. I'll ask questions, but that's it. No romance, no strong emotions, no ‘just getting laid'. It's not fair to Adam and I just can't deal."
I sure as hell wasn't going be so cavalier about shielding anymore. I'd gotten so used to being around nothing but humans, I'd let myself go a little. Let those metaphysical muscles get soft and vulnerable. I'd have to definitely do some serious work on strengthening my safeguards before tomorrow night.
"M'hija, look, I know I'm pushing you to go. You need to ask questions, maybe just even reconnect with someone who's a friend. But don't forget your cousin was killed by someone who meant it. It wasn't an accident. Whatever happens at dinner, whatever you discover at the ranch, don't forget. Whoever killed Marty might actually be someone with a grudge against your family. Please be careful."
My family saga was full of tales of vendettas and blood feuds, like some sort of supernatural Sopranos. Not all of those stories were ancient history. About ten years ago, a new feud had started between cousins in Spain over a piece of hunting land. Last I heard, they were still duking it out.
"But, Bea, this was Marty,” I said. “He was human. That's backwards. If there were a grudge, it would be against—” I stopped. The only one of my family around here with any powers was me—and Tucker—but as far as I knew, no one but Bea and Carlton knew he was here.
She nodded. “I know, he's the one that died, but what if it is family related? If there's a vendetta against your family, you're it around here, girlfriend, and no matter what you are, you're not invulnerable. You can still be hurt."
It might take the equivalent of a wrecking ball to really injure me, but the fact was that I could be injured, even killed. I hadn't thought of that. After all, how many women or even men were ever in real, life-threatening danger? Now, I might just be.
[Back to Table of Contents]
CHAPTER TEN
After Bea left, I turned to my brother.
"Well?"
"Well, what?” he asked.
"Know anything about any vendettas?"
"You know I don't keep up with that shit, Keira."
"Then how are we supposed to find out?"
Tucker took one look at me and said nothing.
"Damn,” I said.
He grinned and shrugged. “There's no other way. She's the only one who'd know for sure."
"But if I call her, she'll know I'm changing."
Tucker's smile turned into a belly laugh.
"You really think she doesn't already know?"
"What do you mean? She can't possibly know."
My brother came over to sit beside me on the couch. “Keira, sister mine, why on earth do you think I'm here?"
The realization hit me about the same time his hand took mine. I pulled away.
"Shit, Tucker. She sent you?"
He had the grace to look embarrassed.
"Yeah, pretty much,” he said. “She's the chief, Keira, connected to each of us in more ways than you care to know. She knew you were changing before you did."
"Well, fuck me,” I said. “So great-great-granny really did send you to babysit."
"I told you it was either me or Ciprian,” he smiled. “I figured you'd be less pissed off if I came."
"You're right about that,” I agreed. My brother Ciprian, although centuries younger than Tucker, was a dried-up old fart. He was the only brother who didn't enjoy the shapeshifting part of his nature. A numbers-cruncher at heart, he kept the family books and considered himself our prefect. Gigi let him play his little game because she hated dealing with the realities of modern financial considerations. Ciprian had increased the family fortunes tenfold in the last couple of centuries, meaning each of us was independently wealthy in our own right. We were grateful for his fiduciary talents, but Tucker was definitely an improvement over an immortal with the heart of an accountant and the demeanor of a Jesuit headmaster.
"Why don't you call?” I asked. “She likes you."
"She likes you, too, Keira,” Tucker said. “I don't know why you don't think so."
"Maybe because I'm in fucking exile here,” I retorted. “Think that's why?"
&nbs
p; Tucker's voice was gentle. “Sister mine, be reasonable. You chose to stay in Rio Seco when we all left. There was nothing for you here except to rot and wallow in guilt and self-recrimination. So Gigi gave you an assignment."
I didn't want to admit it, but Tucker was right. I'd reacted out of confusion and stubbornness, refusing to take my family's advice. Too soon after I'd bought my house, the burning need to stay and lick my wounds morphed into an endless round of boredom and sameness. All I could see before me was the excruciating parade of endless nights/days/months turning into decades, into centuries. I'd been trained for and enjoyed action and all I had was inaction and ennui. Just last week, I found myself whiling away the hours pacing my own floors. Where does one go when the world stops being discoverable? When Paris, Rome, even Nairobi all have the same air of ... sameness? Another city, another few decades. I'd felt the change coming on, didn't admit it. Instead, I'd played the ostrich and look where it got me.
I looked at my brother. “I stayed in Rio Seco to get away from things, Tucker. It was easier then. I didn't have to think. All I had to do was to keep Marty out of trouble, and I couldn't even do that right. Damn it, I've pretty much fucked up what little life I do have at this point. I don't know what the hell to do."
Tucker handed me the phone then walked outside to the porch, closing the front door behind him. I knew I'd be fooling myself if I imagined he couldn't overhear. His hearing was better than mine, but at least he was pretending.
* * * *
"Dear child, I knew you'd be calling soon.” The honeyed voice was calculated to sooth and relax. It had just the opposite effect on me. I paced while I talked.
"Hello, Gigi.” I tried to keep my voice steady and not let her hear my emotions.
Great-great-grandmother was too much of a mouthful, and I couldn't quite bring myself to use her given name of Minerva. Too personal. I'd started calling her Gigi as a child. “Grandmother” with two G's in front. For whatever reason, she'd thought it was cute. The name caught on and now even my brothers used it.
