by Eve Newton
“Erm,” I say. “Three months? Xanthe said twice a year or so.” Oh no, my whole body fills with dread that I have to do that again so soon and for the rest of my unnatural life.
“Not for you,” She says. “You were made to bear this child. You will be given as much opportunity as is necessary. Hopefully it will take on the first attempt.”
What? I was made to bear this child? What the fuck? “No,” I say to Her. “No, I am not having a baby.” The gods! How many more times do I have to say it?
She narrows Her eyes at me and says, “Oh, yes you will, ValamAtrux. You will give me the future Empress.”
“What’s the rush?” I ask. “I am the future Empress.” This kid had better get in line, dammit.
“You?” She scoffs at me, Her face full of scorn. “You are nothing, but a crossbreed designed to give me my heir.”
What? I step back in shock as if She has just slapped me, which doubles with the fact that another wave of Power has just rushed across the room in the form of my father, who heard this last comment. His look of outrage far outweighs my own and looking at both Lincoln and CK who are growling and making for Tiamat as I hold them back, as they are equally as furious on my behalf. Cole on the other hand, remains perfectly silent. Clearly choosing Tiamat’s side over this baby business. I am going to have to have serious words with my husband.
“How dare you speak to my daughter that way!” Drake roars at Her. Christ, I thought CK had volume, but Drake nearly brought the house down.
Tiamat ignores him and continues to me, “Do you really think I would allow a creature with your tainted blood to rule my Empire? You have only been given this much Power, so you are capable of carrying the true Empress.”
The tears prick my eyes at Her harsh words. I cannot believe that this is what She truly thinks of me, after all this time, pretending to be my mother, pretending I had a place in Her world, but all I am to Her is an incubator designed to give her what She wants.
“Tia,” Drake warns Her and flicks his hand, creating a ball of lightning.
“You stay out of this,” She sneers at him, the crackle of Power coming from Her, set off by his own. “She is not your daughter.”
And the same old argument begins.
“You were never supposed to know about her,” Tiamat yells in frustration.
“It was one of your own who told me about her in the first place,” he bellows back.
That catches Tiamat off guard, and I pity the fool who went behind Her back.
“Why do you care so much about her?” Tiamat shrieks. “Your people will never accept a Halfling like her as she is with Dragon blood running through her veins.”
“How wrong you could be,” Drake drawls calmly. “Not only have they accepted her, they worship her as the Messiah. She will be the one to bring our Kingdoms to greatness.”
Erm, Messiah? Oh, holy crap, what the fuck does that mean? I chance a look at CK who is glaring at me as if he has never seen me before. Cole just looks hurt that I never told him I had some sort of Jesus status going on and Lincoln just rolls his eyes at me.
“Hah!” Tiamat scoffs. “You will never get to her. Never. She will mate with the Chosen One if I have to hold her down while he does it!” She lunges at me, but Drake fires the lightning at Her and She stumbles back a bit. Shit, I hate to think what would have happened if that had hit any of us. We would probably have ended up a pile of cinder that Esther had to sweep up. I push the four of us back into a corner with outstretched arms and a gulp as She rounds on Drake.
“You lay one finger on her and I will start a war so bad that it will make the one our grandparents started look like child’s play,” Drake says to Her.
“You don’t scare me,” She retorts and sends a stream of Dragon fire at him.
Argh! My books! I wail in my head, but fortunately Drake sends a flurry of ice at Her, dousing it. Fuck me. I can feel Cole trembling behind me and CK has gone deathly still. If Lincoln Wolfs out now in agitation, we are so dead.
The fight continues between the two of them, throwing magick at each other, but deflecting it each time. I knew Drake was Powerful, but I didn’t know he was as Powerful as Tiamat. It should come as no surprise really, as the Faerie managed to stave off the Dragons eons ago. Interesting bit of history there, though, that my great grandparents started the war that divided them. Lost in my scattered thoughts, I hadn’t noticed Tiamat edging closer to me and I know that if she gets Her hands on me, I will be taken to the Dragon Realms where no one can reach me, to “prepare” myself. Drake notices it too and he sends a blast of ice lightning at Her that pushes Her back several feet. “Not a chance, Tia,” he says, as he sidles up in front of me. “You aren’t taking her.”
The magick gets put away then and I peek out around the huge bulk of my father to see my mother brushing off Her hands and placing them on Her hips. She clears Her throat and says, “The Faerie will never get her first born, Drake. I will win this fight; I have already taken steps. Mark my words, she is mine.” She Astrals off, thankfully without me, and Drake turns to me, grabbing my arms. He crushes me and I start to cry again as I remember my mother’s harsh words.
“Does She really think all that about me?” I sniffle to the room and no one answers. “Am I really just a means to an end for Her?” I am absolutely torn up. My whole existence has been put into question in black and white, and no one has any answers for me.
Not surprisingly, Cole speaks first. He takes me out of Drake’s arms and holds me close, stiffly, but close. “Pay Her no mind,” he says. “But is it really so bad to have a child that we have to have fights over it in the library?”
I pull away from him and turn my back. Yes, it is so bad.
“That’s not the question here, boy,” Drake says. “She will have a child; the question is whose will it be?”
“Mine,” Cole says forcefully. “I am her Chosen One. Not Sebastian,” he adds and then shuts it as Drake glares down at him.
“We’ll see,” he growls, and he too flits off into the night.
Does no one ever say “goodbye” around here? Why does everyone have to make such dramatic exits for fuck’s sake?
“I need to be alone,” I say and without waiting for an answer, I make a dramatic exit of my own to the clearing in the woods. It is dark, cold, and damp, and suits my mood perfectly. I half expect CK to join me, but he doesn’t. I am not sure if I am happy about that or not. One thing is for sure, he is going to have words with me. But it seems that I have run from my fate for as long as I can. I am nearing the finishing line and it leads to a forked path: Dragons or Faeries? Oh, why me? Why am I so damned special that I got lumbered with this? All I wanted was to marry Cole and to live happy ever after as a normal Vampire. No such luck. I must decide, about Devon as well now and how he will fit into all of…this. But first I need more answers. What did Tiamat mean about my first born? Is that the one that will be all Powerful? Not any others I might have, no matter with whom? So how has that worked out in Empress Aefre’s World, where Cassis is Constantine’s daughter and she is now up the duff with Sebastian’s baby? Who knows? All I know is that puts a lot of pressure on me and it is something I could really do without. Not to mention Cole’s sudden desire to have a child is unnerving. He is definitely on Tiamat’s side with this, that is plain and that makes me very unhappy. As I sit and have these thoughts and questions flowing around my head another unpleasant reminder jumps out at me: Other Fraser’s letter is still sitting in the bottom drawer of my desk. I have no idea what to do about that, either. Now that I have remembered, it pushes all the other problems to the side momentarily. If I am going to start getting my ducks in a row, this particular one needs shutting down. I stand up and make a rash and very quick decision, but I want it dealt with now. I close my eyes and picture Other Liv’s house, exactly like this one, just on a different plane. I open my eyes and I am in the library. Definitely not my library. All the furniture is placed differently, and Other Liv is
glaring at me from behind her desk.
“What do you want?” she asks rudely.
“Nice to see you too,” I reply. I saunter over and remain standing just to piss her off. It works and she stands up to maintain the balance of Power.
“You are better then?” she asks.
“Yes, thank you. Your suggestion worked wonders. Dragon magick?” I ask to confirm my suspicion.
She nods briefly and says, “What are you doing here?”
“I need to speak to your Fraser,” I say. “Is he here?”
“You read his letter then?” she says, tapping her long, pointed nail on her chin. “Are you going to take him up on his offer? I’d like a heads-up if I am going to lose my charge to you.”
Her voice is completely steady, but her eyes betray her very serious emotions over this. It stuns me. I have seen little snippets of her feelings, but this is off the charts. Her eyes are glassy with unshed tears.
“That is between me and Fraser,” I say.
“I see,” she says and sits down again. “He is upstairs in the room on the opposite end of the hallway to mine.”
“Thank you,” I say and turn on my heel.
As I reach the door she adds quietly, “I didn’t think you’d come.”
I pause for a moment, but let it go. I have no intention of taking her charge from her. I want my own Fraser and as soon as all of this baby business is out of the way, I am going to get him. However, I want her to be upset and wondering what I will do. Call me petty, but I really don’t like her.
I make my way quickly up the stairs before I change my mind and hightail it out of there. I stop outside of his door and hesitate. Bunching my hand into a fist, I rap sharply and wait.
He opens it with a hooded look that turns to surprise when he sees me. He hides it quickly and leans casually against the doorframe with his arms crossed. He looks amazing, I think traitorously. His short black hair is damp from a shower, he is dressed in black jeans and a black vest and bare feet. It is a far cry from the last time I saw my own Fraser in a Highland kilt with long, braided black hair and a sword that could cleave a man’s head from his shoulders.
“You read my letter?” he asks, with his soft Scottish lilt.
“Yes,” I say. “May I come in?”
He steps back and allows me entry and I am probably being stupid walking into the shark’s tank but make myself do it anyway.
“You came for me?” he asks.
I shake my head at him. “Fraser, you say you love me, but you don’t even know me.”
“I do know you,” he says. He places his big hands on my face and rubs his thumbs under my eyes. “Everything I need to know; I see right here. Your passion, your fearlessness, your love, your loyalty. Everything.”
I blink and he lets me go. “No, you need to stay here with your own sire,” I say.
“I don’t want her,” he says. “She is vicious and cruel, and she doesn’t love me.”
“She does,” I say to him.
“No!” he shouts. “She left me, she left me all alone when I needed her. She doesn’t care about me. She turned me and left me to find my own way. She made me into the creature I am.”
His impassioned words have shocked me. How could she do that to him? How could she leave him to become a Rogue Vampire? I’ve had dealing with Rogue’s before. A long, long time ago. They are Vampires sired and then left after only a few years with their sire. Gustav was only days old when I left him and that’s why he turned out the way he did. Fraser is a fully functioning member of Vampire society, but that is where his cruel streak comes from. His basic instinct is too close to the surface. I am appalled she could be so wicked as to do this to him.
“You see, that right there, is why I need you. You care about me. You would never abandon a charge,” he says.
“You aren’t my charge,” I say quietly and turn my back to him to regroup my thoughts. This was a super bad idea coming here. I thought he just wanted to play with me, but it seems he really does want to come away with me.
I feel him behind me, his hands on my arms. He sweeps my hair away from my neck and whispers, “I can feel it. I am yours.” He brushes his lips softly down my neck and whispers the four words that I cannot refuse. Four words that when muttered I have the overwhelming need to do something. “You can fix me.”
Oh gods, I want to. I can’t refuse a plea like that, not from him. He lightly grazes me with his fangs and that snaps my attention back into focus. He isn’t supposed to have fangs. My Fraser doesn’t have fangs. Sure, the topic will come up again at some point after I’ve brought him to me, but currently, well, in the past, currently, he isn’t a Vampire. It seems wrong that someone else did this to him, and it drives home the fact that he isn’t mine and never will be. I step away from him before he bites me and turn to him. He looks crestfallen and it breaks my heart. “There is no place for you in my World, Fraser. Your place is here.”
“Yes, there is,” he says. “He is dead, but I am immortal. We can be together forever.”
There is only one way to close this down, so I tell him of my plans to bring past Fraser to my present. “So, you see, he will be with me. And you must stay here with your sire.”
He looks deep into my eyes and I am mesmerized. They are no longer cold and hard, but the eyes of my beloved. “Your love and loyalty know no bounds,” he says. “You are absolute perfection. But you need to leave him where he is. He doesn’t want what you are offering him. Trust me on that,” he adds bitterly.
I lower my eyes because I know he speaks the truth. It is something that I am going to have to ignore for now. He tilts my chin up and lowers his mouth to mine. I slant my head to meet him and then I clear my throat and step back. I am a traitor of the worst kind. Wanting to kiss this Fraser makes Cade’s betrayal of me look like nothing.
“Please,” he whispers. “I need you to help me.”
Oh, Christ, not the 'h' word! He is killing me here.
“Bring me to your World and I will be everything you want me to be. If I stay here, I will remain this monster. She has left me with little choice.”
Blackmail? That’s a bit low, isn’t it? I frown at him, but he just looks back at me sadly and I know that isn’t how he meant it.
“I love you, Liv,” he says. “Let me.”
“It isn’t me that you want,” I say. “You want Emily and I can’t be her.”
He looks suitably confused as he asks, “Who is Emily?”
We stare at each other for a few moments. He doesn’t know who Emily is? Other Liv must have gone to him as herself and he fell in love with her anyway. Just one more thing that is so vastly different between us. And I, of course, look exactly like her, but with all the traits that he wants in his sire. Ah, crap on toast. This is way worse than I first thought.
“Doesn’t matter,” I mumble. “But…”
“But nothing,” he says and takes me in his arms. I struggle against him briefly. Geez, he is strong. I break free and it finally occurs to me that he is special, just like Cade. Sired after the Power.
“Fraser, I can’t do this with you. I came to tell you, you must let this go,” I say.
“Never,” he says. “Liv won’t ever take me to your World again, but I will find another way. I promise you.”
I gulp at his aggression and I see the real Fraser again. The one that hurts people for amusement. Will mine really turn into this if I go for him? No! I yell at myself. I will never abandon him, never.
I have no more words for him. I have said what I came to say and now it is time to leave and never return, no matter what the circumstances. I open the door and don’t look back as I close it behind me quietly.
I have a visitor waiting for me as I exit the room. Not who I was expecting though. I thought Other Liv would be up here eavesdropping, but the little nosey parker is Other Devon.
“Devon,” I say to him as I pass him.
He follows me and says, “You shouldn’t mess with him.
He is dangerous.”
“I’m not and I know,” I say as I look back at him. He stops, so I do. He is staring at me with such a grave intensity that just looks wrong on him. My darling boy’s beautiful blue eyes were never meant to be so serious.
“What is he like in your World?” he asks me. “Your Devon.”
It doesn’t surprise me that he asks. Everyone is madly curious as to their Other selves. “He is passionate, fun, and easygoing,” I say, although this would probably be his description from a year ago. He is way too serious and secretive at the moment.
Other Devon looks quite sad and I feel sorry for him. Man, I am such a sucker, really. I move closer to him and place my hand on his cheek. He starts in surprise, but then closes his eyes. “Your spirit has been crushed,” I say so quietly to him. “You need to take back some control. Don’t let her ruin you, you are so much better than that.”
It’s probably too little, too late, but I feel like I have to say something to him. It hurts me to see him like this.
“Wh-what do you mean?” he asks with his eyes still closed.
I remove my hand and his eyes open again. “Find yourself a little Vampire to play with,” I say. “Your sire is too much, you need pleasure in your life, Devon.”
He gets angry with me. “How do you know I don’t have any pleasure?” he snaps at me.
“Because I can see it in your eyes. She has stamped out your fire with her…ways. You need to get it back before it’s lost forever,” I reply.
He takes that in silently and then asks a question I wasn’t expecting. “The girl, Jess. Your Devon is her sire, isn’t he? How did that happen?”
“Oh,” I say. “Err, well the two of them are in love, she wanted him to turn her, but he refused, so she tried to kill herself in order for him to save her.”
“What?” he asks. “Why would she do that?”
Beats me. I shrug.
“Liv said she asked about me,” he admits quietly. “What do you think she wants with me?”
