The park was empty, and since it was after dusk it was technically closed. Neither of them cared and kept going, passing under a sign announcing a fair next week. Lee really liked this place. It was quaint without being just a stretch of houses. Maybe she should look into moving here. Although, it was awfully close to Andora. Was it too close?
Probably.
It was also probably not the time to be thinking about this. Lee hadn’t thought about moving in weeks, not seriously. But that had been the plan all along, hadn’t it? Vince was back, and whole and safe. She did her duty there. No more reason to put it off.
Lee looked over at Vince and it felt like her stomach had fallen out of her body and was being drug behind her. He was lost in his own thought, or maybe just enjoying their walk in the night. Regardless, he was happy. It was all over his face.
Yep. No reason for you to stick around. None at all.
“Shut up,” she muttered to herself. She was on a date for god sake.
Vince looked over at her, pleasure softening his eyes in the light cast by the moon. “Hmmm?”
“You said Jenny got you to participate more in the pack, how so?” she asked in an attempt to cover up her thoughts.
He didn’t seem to mind the break in the silence. “Well, after what happened with her and Jack, I decided that if I had known the people in the pack then maybe I wouldn’t have been so hesitant to tell someone.”
Lee nodded. “No matter the reason, I’m glad you started getting involved. You are great with the pups.”
“Thank you,” he said with a smile in his voice.
He had slowed down and then stopped completely, their arms stretched between them but neither of them let go. Lee turned and gave him a tug to keep him moving but Vince wasn’t having any of it. There was an intensity about him that she had never seen be for. It intrigued her. Lee took a few steps back to him, half in curiosity, half in trance. His brown eyes called to her, begged her to come closer. She willingly obliged.
It took her only a second but felt like an hour to reach him. The moon above them, the sweet air around them, and the glow of the stars illuminating them was like a spell. Vince settled his hand on her nape when she was close enough and dropped his lips to just above hers. They hovered like that, close enough to feel the other’s breath but not close enough to touch. The anticipation of the contact was intoxicating. The mere soft lick of breath on her lips had her heart hammering.
Vince smiled, the corner of his mouth crooking up into a smirk. “You gonna make me wait all night?” he whispered.
Lee’s eyes bugged. “What-”
With a laugh, Vince cut her off and kissed her. She resisted for a half a second, more out of shock than anything. But soon enough she relented and tossed her arms around his neck to pull their bodies together. They let the kiss go as if it were alive. Neither of them had control of where it went and how long it took them to get there. They kissed and touched and pulled and pushed and laughed and smiled and sighed. It was an adventure in the center of a little park in a small town where no one knew who they were.
*****
He had never seen her so content. Vince had tucked her in his truck but just couldn’t get himself to drive back home and say goodnight. It was going so well; easily the best date he’d ever been on. But when he felt her hand stiffen the closer they got to her house, he decided he wasn’t ready for it to end. Vince turned down a road and has been meandering the country roads ever since.
Lee had relaxed again and sent him a smile that said more than any word could. She wasn’t ready to go back to reality just yet either. The dark cloud that hung over her had dissipated for the evening. Out from under the pack’s eye, she had become the person he had gotten to know online. A few times she had even called him by his screen name. He didn’t mind but she would blush or laugh at her mistake. It warmed his heart to see her so unobstructed by worry and doubt.
They had driven around listening to the soft singing coming from the radio. She had moved over until her head could rest against his shoulder. He couldn’t tell if she was asleep or not. Up ahead he pulled off onto the lane that led to a pack made trail and parked.
Lee tilted her head up and asked in a sleepy voice, “What are we doing here?”
Vince kissed her, soft and slow. “Nothing really. What do you want to do?”
He had meant it as “do you want to go home yet?” but she had taken it otherwise. Lee unbuckled her seatbelt and crawled into his lap. He hadn’t had a girl on him like this since he was seventeen. Lee laughed at what must have been the surprise on his face and began kissing him. He found this confidence sexy as hell and ran his hands up her thighs.
They made out like that for what seemed like an hour. When was the last time he had just kissed a woman for the sake of kissing her? Of course, he wanted to race home and toss her in his bed but he found this was satisfying too.
His hands were under her shirt and it killed him not to tear it off of her so he could get a look at the slender figure currently driving him mad. They were going to need to stop soon if they were going to stop at all.
He was calculating how he would maneuver her out of her jeans in the confined space when her lips left his. She was flush with a swollen, well kissed mouth. It made him want to see other parts of her flush, swollen and well kissed.
“What do you want to do?” she said throwing his own words back at him.
Vince smiled something wicked. “I think you know what I want but that isn’t up to me to decide.”
Lee had her hands on his chest and was panting. She didn’t immediately say anything, which told him everything. She may have wanted more but if it was taking this long to say it, then she wasn’t ready. Vince took a breath and told his body to calm down. This would have to be enough for now. He took one of her hands and brought it to his lips.
“For tonight, I think this is a good place to end,” he said and then placed a kiss on her palm.
She looked disappointed and relieved.
He knew he had made the right call.
With his help, Lee crawled back over to her side of the truck. He had to wipe down the fogged up windows before they left so they could see. It made Lee laugh, which made him grin.
“I haven’t fogged up the windows in a very long time.”
He winked. “Me neither.”
As they pulled into her driveway, he noticed how the lines under her eyes had settled back in and as every muscle in her face hardened. It wasn’t fear that he had seen there, or even trepidation. He wanted to ask her why coming home put a look of courage on her face. Why did she need courage to go home? Now that they had been gone for a few hours and he had seen her without her guards up, he knew that this was the look she put on to face most deeds throughout the day.
“I could stay,” he began but let his words drop away when he thought about how it sounded.
Lee looked back at him and for a moment, she was back in the park without anything to worry about. “Thank you, but I think we should leave tonight where it is at.”
“Are you sure?” He looked passed her to the dark door. She had forgotten to leave the porch light on. “I can go in and just walk around and make sure everything is alright.”
She opened the door and gathered her purse. Before hopping out of his truck and laid a soft kiss on his lips. “I’ll be fine. It’s not what’s in there that I’m afraid of. It’s what’s not.” Vince frowned. Before he could ask her what she meant she had gotten out and closed the door.
Chapter Eighteen
Vince only had a few minutes to spare that afternoon because he had to get home to meet Cobie. At one point, it had been an everyday event but now they had relaxed it to once a week. Cobie didn’t need the supervision he once did. Now that he was getting to know the rest of the pups in the pack, he was going to try and make time for each of them to have a little one on one with him.
That schedule would be ironed out later in the week after he had another easy da
y. His ribs were better but by the end of the day everything was aching and exhaustion had set in. By the weekend, he’d be back to normal and already planned an expedition with the pups. At this point, he just wanted to get back into the swing of things.
Yesterday Owen and Miles had stopped by when he was napping. They had drug him out of bed, pumped him with coffee and made him talk. Vince begrudgingly went through his ordeal in explicit detail and when he was finished, he rinsed out his cup and went back to bed. His mother would be ashamed of him for his lack of hospitality but he didn’t give a damn. Sleeping in his bed was one pleasure he would never take for granted again and was quickly becoming his favorite part of the day.
But that was only on days he didn’t see Lee.
For the last two nights, she had come over to his place to “check on him.” Medically, there was nothing more she could do for him. They both knew it. Vince only went along with the charade because it got her cuddled up next to him on the couch watching mindless comedies all night. He loved that she snorted when she laughed and found her affinity for cooking competitions entertaining. Lee had a competitive side, even if it only applied to cupcakes. They talked about games and the missions they kept getting stuck on. He told her more of his family and the pack he left behind. She enjoyed his stories of misery at the hand of his cousins.
Vince was truly a lucky son of a bitch. Both the women he had been attracted to were one in the same and she was just as hooked on him. He hadn’t seen even a flicker of the depression that had been dragging her down in previous months. When they were alone, she was open and bright. She loved to talk and laugh. Cuddling had been a surprise. She was a snuggle bug and found every excuse to drape her legs across his lap or rest her head on his shoulder. He didn’t argue, of course. Vince would have held her all night long if she had asked. But each night she would look at the clock and a shadow would cross over her features. She would smile sadly and tell him it was time for her to go. Just once he wanted to convince her to stay, but exhaustion had already set in and Vince could barely keep his eyes open, let alone argue with her that keeping him company in his bed was detrimental to his recovery.
He could see the look that would cross her face even now. She would get that smirk that saw through his shit. The one that she used on pretty much every injured dominant wolf that crossed her threshold. She would listen, nod in understanding as he explained his case and then strike him down with whatever loophole she had found in that logic of his. There was always a loophole. No wolf had ever gotten out of that smirk of hers. Tyson was the biggest offender back when he was enforcer. His excuses for avoiding the medical center were somewhat legendary.
So Vince would bide his time until he was well enough to kidnap her and make her stay. Screw logic and that damn sexy ass smirk of hers. Lucky for him, that day was coming soon. Which is why he was opening the door to the Wick and searching her out. He planned on stealing a few kisses and asking her on another date.
And there she was.
God, every time he saw her, he was struck with how beautiful she was. Although, today she didn’t have that carefree smile on her face. There were lines under her eyes from a sleepless night and the way her shoulders hung, gave him a sunken feeling.
He had thought she was doing better. He had thought…well, it didn’t matter now. Lee looked up from where she was unloading a box of liquor and saw him. A flicker of happiness broke over her face and she crooked the corner of her mouth into a smile. Vince started for her but stopped when that little bit of happiness he caused her dropped into horror. Lee looked around at all the people in the room and then back to him. Silently her eyes pleaded with him to not do anything to draw attention to them.
Vince raised his eyebrows in surprise. Did she really want him to act like they weren’t together? Not that they had talked about what they were, but after spending the last few nights together he had assumed they were in some kind of relationship. One he didn’t want to keep only behind closed doors. Ignoring her frantic little head shakes, he walked to the bar and took a seat in front of her.
“Hey, Lee.”
She nodded a hello and then dropped her eyes back to the box that was all but empty.
“I was thinking that maybe instead of you coming over to my place that we could grab something out then go for a run. I want to shift and stretch my legs and hoped you would come with me.”
She had frozen and stared at the shelf she had been stocking. A few of the people around them were openly watching, while he could feel the gaze of a few others who were kind enough to hide their attentions. Vince didn’t care but it was obvious that Lee did. She raised her head and looked right into his eyes. They were full of…nothing. She had put up every security measure available to her and blocked him out.
Lee stood, brushed her hands on her apron in a calculated way and then said, “Vince, don’t take my attentions with you as anything more than medical. I come over to check on your ribs and stitches. I’m sorry if I gave the impression of something else.”
So this is how she wanted to play it? Alright, he’d bite.
“So you kiss all of your patients that way?” he asked coldly.
All of the color dropped from her face. She skittered her eyes around at the faces watching the spectacle. They weren’t the ones she should be worried about, he thought. He was the one fuming over her dismissal. Who were these people to her? Aquaintances? Customers? They sure as hell weren’t friends because she didn’t have any of those. So why the concern over their opinions?
Vince didn’t have time for this bullshit. Lee’s mouth was trying to form words but every moment she stood there, more people stopped what they were doing to watch. He slid out of his chair and left.
*****
Shit, shit, shit.
The bell rang as Vince opened the door and left. Her whole body seemed to sink into itself and when she felt the eyes of everyone move from where Vince had just exited to her, she wanted to die.
As in, sink so far into herself that she disappeared from existence completely.
“Scared him away, huh?” Owen asked from behind her.
Lee choked on a breath. Of course. Why not make her mortification complete and have Owen hear the whole damn thing?
“W-what? No. Um. Excuse me.” Lee pushed passed him and into the kitchen. Why was everyone still looking at her? God, when she left they were going to start talking about her. Then those people would tell other people and then everyone would know.
That thought made her stomach turn on end.
“Lee,” Owen said pushing open the swinging door, following her. “Lee, what’s wrong?”
She could feel the wolf rising. Her anxiety was so high at the moment that she could barely keep her hands still as she tried to remember where the bathroom was. “Can’t you just go away?” she said almost in tears. Where was the bathroom? God, why couldn’t she remember? Her mind was so jumbled right now.
“Just go away and leave me alone.” Her vision wavered for a second as her wolf began to push for control.
No no no. Not yet. Not in front of him.
Bathroom. To the left of the dry storage. Go.
She ignored Owen’s attempts at communicating because she was well past that point. She reached the bathroom and closed the door on his face. He banged his fist against it causing a thundering of echoes around the small tiled room. Lee sunk to the ground.
“Goddammit Lee! Open the door. We are talking this through. You’ve avoided it for too long.”
Her vision had gone black as she settled carefully onto the floor. The coolness felt good on her cheek.
“Owen,” came Chuck’s voice. “Owen, let me.”
“She is sick!” Owen yelled, adding a thud to the door with his fist. “And she won’t let me help her.”
“I know,” Chuck said calmly. “I’m working on it. But what you are doing isn’t helping. She thinks you hate her. Yelling is only reiterating that.”
“Jesus, Lee.”
Owen, her alpha, ex-lover and ex-best friend sounded like she just ripped his heart out. “I don’t hate you. I love and care for you. Whatever you think is just wrong, come out so we can talk and finally clear this up. Please, Lee.”
Had she not been losing feeling in her arms maybe she would have opened the door. As it was, she was too far into the shift to do much else but let it happen. She didn’t even fight it this time. Let her wolf have control. She didn’t care anymore, she didn’t want it. When Lee walked, she destroyed those around her. At least when her wolf walked, they were safe from her.
*****
Owen rested his head against the door. Chuck was trying to pull him away but he couldn’t leave her like this. He could feel her shift through the bond and in this moment of flux he felt her pain. Lee was plagued in sorrow. The bond, which acted like a tether from the alpha to each of his wolves, was brittle and fraying. It was sick and dying. Owen flattened his palm on the door wishing he could reach her.
“Look, she’s been dropping off for a while. I’m working on it. She trusts me and right now she doesn’t trust anyone.”
He pounded his forehead onto the door. “Why doesn’t she trust me?” Over everything else they were, they were friends first.
“Because for a moment you gave up on her. She had pissed you off and you pushed her away.” Owen lifted his head and looked at Chuck. His voice was seething with accusation. “You know how she is. Lee can’t handle rejection from the small group of us she has because she handles it on a daily basis. You rejected her and took all of those she loved most with you. She let you down and doesn’t think that she deserves your forgiveness.”
“I was angry. She kept me from Mira. But I never-”
“You did,” he cut in. “You wanted to punish her and you did, thoroughly. Maybe, later on, you had forgiven her but the damage was done. I know you were angry but she is fragile, always has been. If you would have just taken a second to consider what you were doing…never mind. It doesn’t matter now.” Chuck looked at the door and grimaced.
On the Edge (Adirondack Pack Book 3) Page 15
