He wasn’t sure if he should go through with it or push it back a month. These were the times that being an alpha sucked. One of his wolves needed him and yet so did an entire population of wolves. He couldn’t do both so who did he choose?
And then there was the Allagash Pack in Maine. He had spoken to Andrea, newly appointed alpha. She had given him some insight into what happened twenty-three years ago with Thomas James. Owen hadn’t planned on asking outright. He had actually wanted to wait until next weekend after he had time to talk it through with Mira. She had never mentioned getting in touch with her father’s old pack, considering the theory that they killed him, Owen didn’t blame her. But Andrea was new, not to the pack but to her position. Two years prior after having witnessed her Alpha and a group of whom she called “cronies” kill a human on a pack run instead of the typical deer, she had had enough. Andrea issued a challenge while he was still gutting the carcass.
There had been a steady downfall in the pack ever since she could remember but people were scared to do much about it. Andrea having known and hidden her dominance from the males, fought and won the challenge. The cronies were given the choice to stay and reform or to leave. Most left, a few stayed for their family’s sake.
Andrea had no problem telling Owen what she knew of the James family. He had been killed by the alpha on a run. It took a few years for the truth to come out and by then Ann and her children had been long gone, but over time, the alpha had begun to brag about it. Andrea was thrilled that they were ok. She hadn’t known them very well but she did know Thomas and what they did to him was inexcusable.
Owen did not tell her that he was bringing Mira with him to the meeting. He needed to explain all of this to Mira beforehand and see how she reacted. Andrea did express interest in meeting the James sisters at some point and offering an apology on behalf of the non-crazy wolves in the pack.
Bluto jumped off his lap so suddenly that he frowned when he skittered away into the bedroom. A second later someone pounded on his door. Owen could feel the anger and worry through the door and took a pretty good guess at who was behind it.
They pounded again impatiently.
“Vince,” he said as he opened the door. “I had expected you earlier, much earlier.” Lee had been here for a few days and not once had anyone heard from Vince. Owen knew they had a fight last weekend but he had thought the man had a bit thicker skin.
“I need to see her,” he said from the doorway. Owen hadn’t moved to let him in.
“Why now?”
“I only just found out from Sadie,” he snarled. “Maybe if someone had the consideration to call and let me know that my ma-" Vince cut himself off and looked away. "That Lee was turning then I would have been here sooner instead of pacing my house trying to give her the space she needed.”
Owen considered him a moment and then let him enter. Vince breezed past him and into his living room. “What makes you think she wants to see you?” he asked closing the door.
“Doesn’t matter if she does or not, I need to see her. It’s my fault she’s here now.”
Owen went back to the spot on the couch he had been sitting in. Vince didn’t sit at first but he seemed to reign in his anger and make himself take a spot on the couch.
“Why do you think that?”
He didn’t appreciate the look of “are you a complete idiot or just blind?” that Vince gave him. “You don’t find it a little coincidental that she falls off the deep end right after our fight? Hell, I knew she didn’t actually want to break up with me, it was written all over her face, but she did and it put her in that cage you call a room downstairs.”
Owen hadn’t considered this. After the man hadn’t shown his face when she was brought in, he didn’t give much thought at all to Vince.
“You think you can get through to her?”
He ran a hand down his face. “I don’t know. I probably shouldn’t even be here after she pushed me away last week but I miss her and I am not going to let her go without a fight.”
There was something in his eyes that made Owen agree. It was the same fierce protectiveness he saw in Tyson when he was with Sadie and what he felt about Mira. Vince loved Lee. He didn’t know how that came to be, but there it was, plain as day in his eyes. “Good enough. She’s not talking right now but maybe she will for you. Go see her and know I will skin your balls with my rusty hunting knife if you hurt her.”
Chapter Twenty-Four
“Yo, Vince,” Tyson said poking his head out from the room he just passed. Owen hadn’t told him what room Lee was in; just that it was the second floor, east wing.
“Hey man, how is she?” Vince backtracked to Tyson. The room was small a desk and two chairs was about all it could fit but it had six monitors, only two of which were on. He saw twelve different angles of Lee. She was sitting in bed, her legs pulled up so she could rest her chin on her knees and her back to the corner. She was staring at the door. He wasn’t sure if she was trying to figure a way out or wishing someone would walk through it.
“Sadie called, I’m sorry no one contacted you. I guess we were all just so focused on Lee and everyone already seemed to know what happened, we just assumed you knew.” He looked back to the monitors and frowned. “We cut back on the people allowed in the wing. Too many just wanted to come and gawk like she was some zoo animal,” he sneered. “Fuck that. She’s a member of this pack. She deserves respect no matter what frame of mind she is in.”
Vince was only half listening. He couldn’t take his gaze from the screen. Her eyes looked dead. They were missing that spark in that he had grown so fond of.
“Vultures,” Vince said. “All of ‘em.”
“Damn straight.”
“Is it hot in there?” he asked thinking she looked a bit flushed.
Tyson turned his chair so that he could look at the monitors and Vince. “No, she’d had a fever on and off for days. She…” His words trailed off as he caught sight of her moving. Lee slid underneath the blankets and backed herself up against the wall.
“Keeps an eye on that door?”
Tyson jutted up in a half smile. “Noticed that, did ya? She hasn’t turned her back to it yet. I think she wants to know who is coming. Doesn’t want any surprises.”
“She’s not going to like when I walk in then.”
Tyson’s eyes flicked off the screen and over to him. “Why’s that?”
Vince turned to the doorway looking at her door on the other side of the hall. “She thinks she scared me off. She didn’t. Obviously.” Vince looked back to Tyson and smiled. “Plus, I make her nervous.”
Tyson laughed as he remotely unlocked her door. “Have at it, Buddy.”
Vince stepped through and was surprised to see her eyes had closed. He knew she wasn’t sleeping, though. He walked passed her into the bathroom, grabbed a washcloth and wet it with the coldest water he could. He then walked back out to her room. There was a folding chair against the wall but that was too impersonal. Vince chose to sit on her bed, in her space. He wasn’t sure why he wanted to be so intrusive. The sensitive thing to do would be to hang back and let her come to him, but he had a feeling that is what everyone else was doing. They were treating her like she was sick, which she was, but she didn’t need to be coddled.
Even as he sat down on the bed beside her, she didn’t open her eyes. “Glilee, I’m going place a washcloth on your forehead. Your fever is back as I’m sure you know.” She didn’t make any move to acknowledge that she heard him. Vince laid the cloth on her forehead and let his fingers trail down the side of her face before putting them back on the bed.
“I’m going to talk, you’re going to listen, and then I’m going to leave.”
Again, no acknowledgment but he knew she was listening. Her face had tilted in his direction.
“Alright, let me start by saying that I miss the hell out of you. This last week has sucked without you lighting up my evenings. You broke things off but I don’t believe your heart
was in it. For that reason, I’ve been trying to figure out what I want. We had one date,” he said with a grin. “One really good date. So no one would fault me for not fighting for you after you broke up with me. But that’s not what I wanted. It may have just been one incredible date,” he said flicking his eyes over to her face. That might have been a twitch of a smile he saw. “But we started long before that one date. Lee, you and I have been circling each other for years. It’s true, I may not have known it at the time but let me tell you something you don’t know. I’ve had a thing from you since the first time I saw you. I even tried to ask you out a few times but crashed and burned so bad you probably thought I was demented.”
Vince picked up her hand and wove their fingers together.
“This one time I came into the clinic to ask you to dinner. I had been in town for maybe three months at that point. You probably don’t remember it…but by the look on your face, I’d say you do.” Her features had softened to the point of almost smiling. She didn’t want to laugh but she did remember that unfortunate day.
“Somehow you mistook my appearance and sad attempt at small talk as me having gonorrhea.” He waited a moment hoping she would correct him, but she stayed silent. “No, you’re right. It was herpes. I was so mortified that I just went along with everything until you asked me to drop my pants so you could have a look. I left when your back was turned. That was just the first time. I had to go home and lick my wounds a bit but I came back to fumble twice more. By then you had begun to glare at me whenever you saw me so I assumed at that point my attentions would not be appreciated. Of course, that’s when I met Glilee online.”
Her fingers twitched ever so slightly. It made him smile.
“When I was at Pine Grove, I thought of you. Actually, you were all I could think about. I imagined you getting huffy and pissed when I didn’t show up and could see you yelling at me for being late. You get this divot right here.” Vince stroked his finger right between her eyes. “When you are mad. It’s adorable. So I thought of that divot and how much you probably wanted to kick my ass for making you wait. Then I wondered if you worried about me. If you dreamed of me. There wasn’t much to do there, much like you must be feeling right now, so I would daydream that you would walk through those gates and find me sitting under the maple tree I had claimed. Imagine my surprise when you did show up. Not Miles or Owen, but you.”
Vince looked down at her and found her eyes to be open and watching him. Lee didn’t hide herself. Her eyes were so wide, so trusting. He had never seen her so open before. Without a second thought, he leaned down and kissed her, soft but with enough force that she would remember it later.
“I love you, Lee,” he said softly for only her to hear. Tyson had heard enough of everything else, this was just for Lee.
Vince rested his forehead against hers. “I’ve been in love with you for a long time. So I think you need to decide what you want because I've already made my choice.” Vince kissed her forehead and squeezed her hand once before standing up and leaving, just like he said he would.
For a second when he turned to close the door behind him, he thought he saw a hint of that spark she had lost.
*****
Lee could still feel the warmth of his hand on her own even hours after Vince had left. This was the most aware of anything she had felt in months. The bomb he had dropped on her still rang in her ears.
“I love you, Lee. I’ve been in love with you for a long time.”
There was no thinking after that. Her brain just couldn’t process anything. She watched him go and found herself wishing he would come back. Wished that she had the voice to call out after him. But she didn’t, she let him leave.
Now that some time had passed she wondered if he really meant it. The cynical part of her believed that he was put up to it by Owen and the others. They wanted her better, why not give her some nugget of hope to cling onto?
But then there was that part that wanted to believe he was telling the truth. She wanted his love so badly that she felt selfish for it. Because if that had been an honest declaration, then the feelings she had for him these past few years could be named. Lee would no longer have to convince herself that what she felt for Vince wasn’t love but some sort of infatuation.
The door opened a little while later as she walked the perimeter of the room to stretch her legs. It was lunch time so she was surprised to see Miles walk through the door holding her lunch and not Chuck. Lee frowned at the sandwich.
“I hope you don’t mind, we traded today. Chuck will be in with your dinner.”
Lee nodded in understanding. This was a day of first-time visitors. Miles had also not been in to see her, but she didn’t think anything of it. He was just a visiting enforcer, not pack.
“Come sit. I have something I need to say and then I’ll let you eat.”
Lee, who had been up and walking around went to her bed. Miles chose the metal folding chair. Lee was beginning to loathe that chair.
“I’ve been at this a long time as an enforcer,” he began looking straight at her. Lee could appreciate his directness. Most of the people tried small talk before getting frustrated with her silence and spitting out the reason they came. “I’ve seen and done many things but a feral wolf is always the hardest for me because at one point they were just another member of the pack. It’s up to me to hunt and kill one of my family because they gave up. They get the easy way out when I have to live with it day in and day out. Their blood never leaves my hands, not truly.”
Lee swallowed the hard truth he was giving her. She had never considered it from his point of view or from Tyson’s.
“You are on the brink. I can see it in your eyes. Right now you can choose to let go and be the wolf, one day possibly killing someone you once cared for because the wolf doesn’t know better. Or you can pull yourself together and continue to live your life. I don’t know your story. I don’t know why you are in the position you are in, but I can tell you that I have seen a lot of packs and this one won’t function correctly without you in it.”
Miles stood having said what he came to say. “Don’t make your friends have to live with your blood on their hands for the rest of their lives. Someday this pain you are feeling will be useful. Own your mistakes, learn from them and move on.”
Chapter Twenty-Five
The two days he had gone in to see her she didn’t talk at all but she did listen. Lee had showered and brushed her hair, she had some pride in how she looked. He also noticed that she moved around more. One of the books Sadie had brought in even had a bookmark halfway through. Sadie would be thrilled when she found out.
Vince wasn’t taking any of this as progress, though. She still looked skeptical when he told her loved her and she still didn't talk. Lee hadn’t made her choice yet.
Today he was trying something new. Cobie was with him and he had an envelope full of letters. The kid had a brilliant idea yesterday and had taken it upon himself to carry it through. Cobie had each of the pups write Lee a letter or draw her a picture of a time they remembered with her. Some of them drew a picture of her helping them at the clinic, others told her about much fun they have when she stays behind on pack runs to play games with them. Sarah Miller drew a very cute picture of them dressed as princesses.
It was Cobie’s letter that gained her more of Vince’s respect. Years ago, Lee had intervened in a fight between Cobie’s father and his mother. His father had been a known abuser of all things, alcohol, drugs, and his wife. Lee had gone over to their house with a lasagna she made in guise of checking on Candice’s new bruises. At the door, she heard the sting of a slap and bust in the door. Lee took a punch to the face but kneed him so hard in the balls that he passed out. It was the last Cobie ever saw of his father, Jett had kicked him from the pack. Lee had been only seventeen at the time, she volunteered at the clinic and had taken a special interest in Candice. Cobie had seen the whole thing and for years believed she was some kind of a superhero.
These were the things she needed to hear. Lee had to see her place in this pack would never be replaced. Yes, there were those older members who were stuck in their ways but she wasn’t the only one being verbally assaulted by them. Most of the pack knew not to take what they said to heart. Lee had never gotten that memo.
“She’s in here?” Cobie asked at the door. Vince nodded. He tapped twice with his knuckle in warning that she had visitors and walked in.
Lee was on her bed reading. She looked up from her book and smiled at him. Cobie stepped around Vince and was looking around. His obvious disappointment that it was not a padded room could be seen clearly on his face.
“I brought Cobie with because he and the other pups have something for you.”
Lee was surprised but took it all in stride. He was glad she was no longer acting like a hermit under the covers. That was not the Lee he wanted Cobie to see.
She patted the spot on the bed beside her and Cobie sat. Together they went through each picture and letter. Cobie explained what the pup had told him when they were working on it. Lee had tears in her eyes by the end of the stack. She flicked her eyes up to Vince who was leaning against the opposite wall and mouthed “thank you.”
After Cobie was done he asked him to wait in the hall for a minute. Lee was in her bed, pieces of colored paper surrounded her. She was looking at each one again, smiling and tearing up as she went.
Vince went to her. He kneeled on the ground before her and kissed her. Lee had kissed back. Her hands drove into his hair and she pulled him close. He had only meant it to be something small like the last few times but she turned it into more. If the cameras weren’t rolling, he’d be tempted to take it further.
“Glilee,” he said when they broke apart. “I hope this helped. I wanted you to see how they see you. Cobie thinks your Wonder Woman, he idolizes you even more than he does me.”
On the Edge (Adirondack Pack Book 3) Page 20
