by Jools Louise
Chapter Six
Slug sat alone on the balcony, looking pensively out over Sage. His thoughts were dark and unpleasant, and his eyes were blind to the view of the town he’d chosen to call home. He reflected on the events of the day, which had started with an argument about pancakes, them a trial by his beloved Ethan to test Ethan’s climbing and jumping skills as a jaguar, and ended with the deaths of RJ, Rage’s father, and Steven, who had never been a father to Slug other than sharing genealogy.
Sighing, Slug took a sip of hot chocolate and blinked, realizing that he’d been sitting for some time, and late afternoon had slipped into evening without him even noticing. Lights blinked on in the storefronts that lined the street, and he spied Murphy and Aiden, escorting their tribe of adopted children over to the movie theater. He smiled, shaking his head since Freddy was accompanying the group, talking a mile a minute, telling everyone who’d listen how his day had gone.
Raking a hand over his bald head, Slug tugged at his bright red ponytail that protruded from an otherwise hairless scalp. He envied the group, and envied even more that Freddy had such a loving family now. Murphy and Aiden were teasing Freddy, their banter going back and forth, and Freddy was soaking up their attention like a sponge. Slug’s own family had never shown an ounce of affection, and their attention was only on him when they wanted something. He could pinpoint the exact time and day when that will had been read since his grandparents had died in a tragic fire at their country home. They had been celebrating their eightieth birthday with Rage, Lash, and Charm’s grandparents, and the whole party had perished. Apparently, they had all been overcome with smoke and had failed to escape.
Slug had doubts about the explanation given, especially since it had been his father who’d given the spiel. It didn’t ring true that six otherwise healthy and strong wolverine shifters would all, suddenly and simultaneously, be unable to call for help or smash a window or tunnel their way to freedom.
As he looked down, he saw Murphy wave up at him and he returned the gesture casually. Something must have given away Slug’s feelings because Murphy tilted his head, and even from this distance, Slug could see the sudden concern on the man’s face. A second later, the big tiger shifter separated from his family, murmuring something to Aiden that had the even bigger man nodding and moving off along the street while Murphy walked toward the café.
Slug felt a sense of unease and relief knowing that Murphy would be in psychotherapist mode. He wasn’t sure he wanted to talk about today, but he had the sense that he needed to. His brain was replaying scenes from the past over and over, and he felt sick to his stomach…and unutterably sad. He should be over the past. There was no point dwelling on things he couldn’t change.
Murphy’s footsteps sounded on the stairs, and a moment later he ambled out onto the balcony, two mugs of coffee on a tray and a plate of chocolate chip and hazelnut cookies.
“Beautiful night,” Murphy offered, sitting beside Slug and propping his boots up on the railing after depositing the tray on a small table between them.
“You’re here to discuss the weather?” Slug replied laconically, feeling edgy and uncomfortable.
Murphy gave a low laugh, sounding genuinely amused. He grabbed his coffee and saluted Slug with a grin. “Douche,” he replied and took a sip of his steaming beverage.
“Sorry,” Slug said gruffly, staring forward. He felt a gentle hand on his forearm and a light, forgiving squeeze.
“Don’t sweat it, short stuff,” Murphy responded cheerfully, which had Slug snorting in amusement at the rejoinder and shooting a dry glance at the big shifter.
“Good things come in small packages,” the wolverine retorted and smirked, feeling more relaxed as he returned the banter.
“Apparently,” Murphy said, grinning. “Freddy’s constantly telling me that.” This had Slug laughing huskily since he knew Freddy pretty well now. The kid visited the café constantly now that he worked in town at the clinic.
“Everyone’s short compared to you,” Slug said, smiling. “Especially if you’re Aiden, in shifted form…” he left the sentence hanging, listening to Murphy’s rumble of amusement. Aiden was a fox shifter, and a hybrid wolf of sorts. Used for experiments by the cult, Aiden had hidden his fox side from everyone, with people taking guesses at what he might be. Slug had thought he must be a tiger or lion, given his immense human size. The big guy took a lot of ribbing when it was discovered how small his shifter animal was.
“I’m not going to push,” Murphy said after a moment of easy silence. “I’ve heard some of your story from Rage and Lash. So I know how tough life’s been for all of you. And I know just how tough you’ve had to be to survive.” Murphy’s amber eyes glinted with empathy, which had Slug’s throat working overtime to restrain the cry that threatened. “If you ever want to offload, I’m a great listener.”
Murphy finished his coffee, and Slug was startled to realize they’d been sitting there in silent contemplation for twenty minutes or so before they’d even begun to talk. Slug began to appreciate just how good Murphy was. He knew Slug wasn’t ready for a big heart-to-heart and had just let him relax, taking his mind off the worries of the day.
Murphy stood and tugged teasingly on Slug’s ponytail. “My best advice is to be with your mates,” he said gently. “When I’ve been at my worst, mentally, the one thing that brings me joy and solace is being surrounded by my loved ones.” He gestured to the café. “They’re waiting for you.”
Slug turned his head and saw Ethan, Rage, Charm, and Lash all standing there, looking worriedly at him. Rage seemed surprisingly calm after what had occurred with his father and brother.
“Hey,” Slug drawled, in his usual laconic way, a smile tugging at his mouth as he saw their relief. They all piled onto the balcony and joined him, crowding around in the chairs already set out, each carrying hot chocolate or coffee.
Murphy waved good-bye, patting Slug companionably on the shoulder, and smiled at everyone as he left.
“Are you okay?” Lash asked, giving Slug a kiss on the cheek.
Slug nodded, shrugging. “I just had a lot on my mind,” he said, turning his head and finding Lash’s lips with his own. They kissed for a while, reconnecting as they always had in times of stress. Slug realized that was the thing he regretted most about his family…their lack of closeness and affection. He’d seen families in town, bonding with love and respect who weren’t even blood relations, and they made it work. Slug realized he had that closeness with his mates and felt his heart ease just a little bit more.
“I thought maybe you were angry about what happened,” Ethan said timidly, looking down at his lap.
Slug heard the distress in Ethan’s voice and let out a soft cry of dismay. “No, baby, I wasn’t angry, and certainly not at anyone here,” he explained, reaching for Ethan’s hand. He met Ethan’s beautiful hazel gaze steadily, glinting in the dim light. “I just felt sad, that’s all. Our families,” he gestured at his brethren, including them all, “they’ve only ever been hostile or angry or cold toward us. I don’t remember a time when we weren’t being blamed for something, or told we weren’t good enough or fast enough or clever enough. Belittlement came with our daily bread, so to speak. Then when we realized we liked each other on a more intimate level, the comments and beatings got worse. We grew into angry young men, not wanting anyone to get close to us, because when you let people into your heart, they can destroy you.”
Ethan stared at him, wide-eyed, tears in his eyes. “Weren’t they ever kind to you?” he asked, looking at his mates sadly.
Lash answered, shaking his head. “They wanted us to be like them. They think they’re perfect. They’re all ambitious and greedy and want to be all-powerful. Our grandparents were the complete opposite, but we weren’t allowed near them. I don’t know what happened to make our families so dysfunctional, or when they became so nasty. I don’t remember them when they weren’t.”
“My mom and dad got worse after Rash was b
orn. I’d already come out, and they were horrified by my orientation,” Rage declared, matter-of-factly. “Shortly after that, we were kicked out of our homes for being gay and spent a bit of time moving from town to town. We were contacted by Steven and Lance, and then we got involved with the cult. We really thought we were being accepted at last, so we accepted the job.”
Charm snorted and grimaced. “They played us like fools,” he said, shaking his head ruefully. “We knew, in our hearts, what they were. We knew they’d never tolerate us being gay and lovers. We were just so desperate for some sign that we mattered, we’d have done anything for them.”
“My mom was the same,” Ethan said softly. “She married my dad because she wanted a nice life, and everyone in the neighborhood was either unemployable, drunk, or involved in gangs. Cody was different. He had ambition and was intelligent enough to want to better himself. When he married her, it was because she put on this show, and he took the bait, thinking her helpless and needing a strong person to guide her.” He paused for a moment, staring out over the glittering lights of the town, his thoughts far away. “I never knew Cody, but she made sure I knew about him, every time she would visit me at the zoo, or the Feenan ranch, or the Idaho facility. She told me how he didn’t want me because he was selfish and mean. She knew what they did to me, and to the others, and cared so little for me. The guards, before you, treated me better than she ever did.”
Slug let out another cry of distress and got up, lifting Ethan into his arms and cuddling him close. He nuzzled into Ethan’s soft throat and then peppered kisses over the younger shifter’s face. “We did that, too,” he said, his heart aching with regret. “We were mean bullies because we believed lies and bullshit told to us by people we knew weren’t genuine.” He began to shake, and then the cries left his throat, and he sobbed, grief-stricken. “I’m so sorry,” he said, distraught. “I’m so, so sorry for what we did to you.”
Slug fell to his knees and felt Ethan’s arms wrap around him, holding him tightly. He hadn’t cried for years. The last time had been when he’d been whipped and beaten by his father after he’d been found kissing Lash, at the age of ten or eleven, to see what it felt like with a boy. Steven had nearly killed him that day, and it was the last time Slug had shed a tear, not wanting the man to see his fear.
He felt his mates gather around, holding on, and he felt their love, without them saying a word. Sometimes love is an overused word, a throwaway comment with little meaning. Slug had always thought actions spoke louder. While his parents had spouted all the right words, their behavior toward him had been far more significant. He realized that his tears had set off everyone else and found a surprising comfort that they’d all been able to release the pent up emotions that had probably been building for years.
Minutes passed and gradually the storm abated, leaving the five lovers exhausted but somehow stronger.
“There’s one thing that I think we all should do, right now,” Ethan suddenly said.
Slug raised his head, looking into Ethan’s tear-stained face and seeing a twinkle of mischief mixed with nerves. “What did you have in mind?” he asked.
“I think I know,” Lash said slowly, kissing both men. “We need to rid ourselves of the last of our demons…or at least the ones from the tunnel.”
Charm and Rage both nodded, looking nervous.
“You want to go downstairs, to the basement,” Slug stated and watched as Ethan nodded hesitantly.
“I think the best time to do it would be now, especially after what’s happened. If we wait and wait and wait, we’ll just keep building our fears into insurmountable obstacles. It’s just a basement, right?” Ethan sounded as though he needed reassurance that there was nothing else down there.
“It’s just a basement,” Slug confirmed, feeling a little sick at the thought of heading downstairs into the bowels of the café. None of them had been down there, finding excuse after excuse to avoid the place. But Ethan was right. They couldn’t keep pretending it didn’t exist.
“Right now?” Charm asked, wrinkling his nose and fiddling with one of his red and gold tipped spikes.
“Right now,” Ethan said firmly. “If we don’t we could end up waiting for months, or even years. If you can face your fathers and I can face my fear of heights, then we can all go slay the basement, together.”
The wolverines shared uneasy looks, but then they all nodded.
“Okay, let’s finish up our drinks and then we’ll go down there,” Lash said, letting out a deep breath, as though stilling his nervous stomach.
As one, they all got up and slurped down the now lukewarm beverages and polished off the cookies before gathering all the dirty crockery and heading down to the café.
Chapter Seven
John was just finishing up behind the counter when the five came downstairs. He looked up, giving them a shrewd glance. The café was practically empty at this late hour.
Scotty, who was wiping down tables, sent them a grin. “Hey guys,” he said, waving a cloth at them. Then his glance turned into concern, spying the obvious signs of their tears. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah,” Lash replied, smiling back. “We just have something we need to do before we head home,” he said, looking at the basement stairs at the far side of the room.
“Here, let me get the lights,” John said casually, coming around the counter swiftly and striding gracefully to the switch. Flicking it on, he stood aside and waited. “I’ll be right here, in case you need anything.”
Lash nodded and guided his mates toward the dreaded basement. He felt nauseous, but pulled back his emotions, not wanting to give in to his fears. Months below ground, fighting to survive, had taken their toll on him and his lovers. He never wanted to go through that again. He was also certain that Ethan was right…if they didn’t face this fear soon, they might never do it. Then he looked up at John and saw the big Brit waggling his eyebrows teasingly.
He flushed as he read the unspoken message there and recalled Mick’s solution to Jamie’s fears of being below ground. It involved a lot of sex, on various surfaces. Apparently, Jamie now begged to go down there, below the old diner.
“Let me go get my backpack,” Scotty said before anyone could speak and rushed past them, coming back about thirty seconds later. He grinned as he returned, patting Ethan on the shoulder, man to man. “You go for it,” he said with a wicked look in his eyes.
Ethan flushed, rolling his eyes. “We’re just going to…you know…see how it is,” he stammered, flushing even more as John and Scotty exchanged amused glances.
“Yeah, that’s what Jamie and Mick said,” Scotty retorted drolly. “Now you practically have to make an appointment, in case they’re indisposed,” he added with a chuckle.
John laughed aloud at the sally and clapped Scotty on the back companionably. “I’ll still wait right here, just in case you need anything,” he drawled, then waved the five mates toward the stairs.
Lash shook his head and rolled his eyes. “Thanks,” he said dryly.
John winked, folded his arms across his chest, and then leaned back against the wall. “I aim to please, gents,” he said, smiling.
Lash led the way, bracing himself as he took the first downward step. The staircase was brightly lit and the walls were made of a honey-colored wood with bright decals depicting old-fashioned tea and coffee logos in an art deco kind of way. As he headed down, the stairs took a right angle to the level below, ending up in a large, modern, and well-equipped room with a kitchen unit, chairs, and tables for staff and a large bathroom complete with shower stall, towels, and toiletries.
“Wow!” Ethan exclaimed, standing beside Lash, holding his hand tightly. Lash squeezed lightly and tugged Ethan closer, wrapping an arm around his waist.
The walls were painted a light cream, and pictures and decals adorned them with vivid splashes of color. Discreet lighting distilled the shadows and managed to light every corner, leaving no dark spaces. There were several wi
ndows positioned toward the ceiling on the street side of the room that could be opened up but were narrow enough not to let anyone get in. It was dark outside, so they couldn’t see anything, but in daylight, the windows let natural light into the space, further removing any reminders.
They heard multiple footsteps in the café above before they were suddenly surrounded by people. Douglas had brought Rash with him and Ellis Hawkwing, someone Douglas had been seeing for a little while. Cody and Thomas wandered down, as well as the eight men who had been locked downstairs with Ethan and the wolverines. Ernest and his mates came, too, and Max and Harley, looking terrified, were accompanied by Lomax and his sisters, Ruth and Sian. The serval, ocelot, and caracal shifters had been in the same condition as Ethan, buried alive in the second part of the tunnel beneath Sage. They had lost family members in the tunnels who had been terribly abused and poisoned before being entombed. Ethan went to give them all a big hug, feeling their trembling from being here. He was so proud of them all. It took guts to do this.
Mick and Jamie brought a large tray of snacks, hot and cold, as well as a big case of cold beers from their bar since John had cleared away his counter already.
Lash stared at everyone, feeling almost light-headed at the show of support and camaraderie. A second later, the beers were popped open and an impromptu party began. Rarely had Lash been lost for words, but right then, seeing the laughter and banter and easy conversation, he had nothing to say that could describe his gratitude.
“John heard you talking,” Douglas said as he wandered up, giving Lash a big hug. Rash remained with Ellis, who kept a hand on the wolverine’s arm almost protectively. “He called Mick, who told Cody…and presto! Instant party.” Douglas kept hold of Lash for a moment longer before easing back. “I hope we didn’t spoil any plans you had going?” he said teasingly.
Slug snorted and grabbed the man, giving him a noogie in retaliation.
