Ava’s heart skipped a beat then resumed its rhythm double time. “Pardon?”
“You know.” Hanna popped a sushi roll into her mouth and chewed slowly before answering. “The airline people wanted you. They weren’t going to green-light the show otherwise. I told Jake to just tell you that, but he had this weird idea that you had to agree to do the show without his influence.”
“He did?” Her voice was faint, which made sense because she didn’t feel a if she could breathe.
“Yes, even if it meant there would be no show.” She shrugged and ate another roll. “I told him he was crazy, but he was insistent.” Hanna smiled. “Anyway, I’m glad it all worked out.”
Ava swallowed some tea, but it did nothing to ease the sudden buzzing in her ears. What did Hanna mean, exactly, that Jake had been willing to let the show go?
She watched Hanna’s lips move. Apparently, she said something funny, because Jilly laughed. Ava forced her lips into a grin as though she, too, was highly amused by Hanna’s witticism. But she was still thinking about the bomb Hanna had just dropped.
Would Jake really have let his dream go? Or was that just something he’d said to Hanna? And why would he say it if he didn’t mean it?
Her mind swirled, thoughts colliding and crashing. She pushed herself up from the couch. Both Hanna and Jilly turned to look at her.
“Everything okay?”
“No.” But it would be. “I have to go. There’s something I have to do.” Someone to see. She grabbed her bag and headed for the door, dodging through the after-work crowd in her high-heeled boots without slowing down.
CHAPTER THIRTY
“WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME about the airline?”
A light rain had begun to fall by the time Ava hopped out of the cab in front of Jake’s town house. She could feel it soaking into her hair. She didn’t care. She tucked her hands into the pockets of her coat and waited, watching his expression morph from surprise to confusion.
He blinked at her. “What?”
“The airline,” she repeated, and shouldered her way inside, ignoring the spark of attraction that ran through her at the minor contact. “Why didn’t you tell me that they made the deal depend on me being host?”
He stared at her, looked her slowly up and down as though she were an ice-cream cone he wanted to lick, and then chugged from the beer bottle he was holding.
“Jake.” She pushed the door closed behind her, reminding herself that she was not dessert. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“You’re here.”
“And waiting for an answer.” Her nerves were on high alert, jangling against each other. She clamped her arms to her sides and tried to think calming thoughts.
He exhaled and rubbed his thumb around the rim of the bottle. “Hanna told you.”
“She mentioned it in passing.” Ava brushed the water from her hair. “Why didn’t you?”
“I considered it.” He took another sip from the bottle, his eyes never leaving hers. “Decided that it wasn’t fair to you.”
“Fair how?” Her arms dropped, making the beads of water on her jacket drip to the floor.
“I didn’t want you to feel obligated.”
“So instead you just offered me a contract that most people would kill for?” He’d practically given her the stars and moon.
He shrugged. “I wanted you to take the job.”
“You should have told me.”
“Maybe.” He leaned a shoulder against the wall. “But then I wouldn’t have known if you were taking the job because you wanted it.”
There was silence for a moment, broken only by the patter of rain as it hit the window. Ava stared at him. He stared back, those clear gray eyes that saw everything. Her throat went dry and, without thinking, she plucked the beer from his hand and took a drink.
“What if I’d said no?”
“Then you’d have said no.” Jake shrugged again.
“That doesn’t make sense.” She frowned. He’d worked so hard, she couldn’t understand why he’d risk losing it all now. “If all you needed was my participation, you would have told me that. So why the big secret?”
She studied him, thinking how good he looked even with messy hair and a ketchup spot on his T-shirt.
“It wasn’t a secret.”
Ava dragged her eyes from his torso. Right. His eyes were up there. “But you didn’t mention it. God, Jake. What if I’d said no? Were you willing to just let the show die?”
“Actually, I was.”
“What?” It wasn’t the answer she’d expected. She’d thought about it on her cab ride over and come to the conclusion that Hanna had been misinformed.
“This isn’t just about the show, Ava. You know that.” He took the beer from her suddenly numb fingers and smiled that slow crooked smile that made her stomach flip. “If it meant I could have a chance with you, I was more than willing to let the show go.”
“But.” She reminded herself that she still hadn’t forgiven him yet, but it was hard when his eyes were crinkling at the corners and he was sipping from the bottle, putting his lips where hers had just been.
She felt the sizzle that always marked their interactions flare up, threatening to make her walk into his arms, close her eyes and forget about everything that had left her feeling broken these past few weeks. She fought back. “Why didn’t you say anything?”
“I didn’t want to scare you off.”
She flipped her hair and wished her knees didn’t feel quite so wobbly. “I think I might need to sit down for this.”
She followed him into the living room, leaving her coat and boots on. It was the first time she’d been to his house since the night she’d shown up after dinner at her mother’s. Though he’d only been back in town a week, it looked much more lived-in than before. There was a long beige sectional in the living room, along with a side chair and coffee table. There was even a print on the wall and she could see the kitchen chairs she’d helped him pick out around the dining table.
“Your place looks nice,” she told him, needing a minute to compose herself. “Settled.”
“Yeah.” He waited until she took a seat—the chair to ensure he couldn’t get too close to her—and then sat on the left side of the couch nearest to her. “That’s because I’m staying this time.”
Ava could feel a rogue trickle of sweat moving down her back. She should have taken off her coat, but just as she’d been about to shrug out of it she’d had this panicked thought that if things didn’t go well, she’d need to make a quick getaway, and dealing with her boots would already be too much. Why hadn’t she thought to wear flats today of all days? Seriously, she was going to break an ankle streaking down the sidewalk and then Jake would probably have to rescue her again.
“You okay?” he asked.
“Fine,” she lied, wondering if her cheeks were as red as they felt. She pressed her fingers to them, first one side then the other. He’d been willing to let the show go for her. She swallowed. “I don’t understand what made you change your mind.”
When he’d moved back to Toronto and started working for his father, she hadn’t thought she’d ever see him again.
“Us.”
She raised an eyebrow at him. “There’s an us now?”
“There was always an us, Ava.”
He was right. Even as far back as that anti–Valentine’s Day party they’d been circling each other, their orbits always colliding. They’d only managed
to avoid it through sheer stubbornness and stupidity. “I know.”
She reminded herself to breathe slowly. In and out. And not to hyperventilate. “Why did you leave without saying anything?”
“I was angry and you were avoiding me.” So her little ruse hadn’t gone undetected.
“You knew where to find me.”
“I thought you wanted it that way.”
She had. Though it was hard to believe now when all she wanted to do was reach out and run her hand over his cheek, feel the familiar line of his jaw, the stubble on his chin. “What happens now?”
“I’m staying,” he repeated, and leaned a little closer to her. “Because leaving the first time was a huge mistake and one that my family has chewed me out about. If it helps.”
“It does.” She felt a smile tickle the edges of her mouth.
He reached out and wrapped his hand over hers. She felt the heat seep into her skin, wanted to wallow in it. “I want to do this together, Ava.”
She ignored the quaking in her belly and was glad she was already sitting down. She desperately wanted things to go back to the way they were, wanted to trust him, but she was scared. What if it didn’t work out? She wouldn’t just be risking her heart, but her career, too. And she’d be left with nothing.
“Ava.” His voice whispered through her, making her shiver. “You don’t have to decide this second. I’ll wait.”
“No.” She shook her head. She didn’t want to wait. She needed to know now. “Would you have still come back even if there was no show?”
He nodded. “I have some connections. I could probably talk my father into opening a West Coast branch of his company that I could run.”
That was unexpected. He’d been so adamant about not working with his father. “Really? With your dad?” He nodded, and she smiled. “What brought on this change of heart?”
“I did some growing up. Realized what’s important.” He squeezed her hand. “And what isn’t. I want to do the show, Ava. But I want to be with you more. It’s an easy decision, if you’re asking me to choose.”
“No.” That thought had never crossed her mind. “I wouldn’t want that.”
He tilted his head toward her. “What do you want?”
Him. Always him. “I want you to do the show and I want to be a part of it.” Her heart beat faster, like a drum solo in her chest. “Also, you are not allowed to fire me ever.”
It took less than 2.2 seconds for him to haul her onto his lap, holding her so tightly that for a moment she couldn’t breathe. Or maybe that was just the thrill of being so near him again when she’d been sure that would never happen.
“Christ, Ava.” His lips were all over her face, her neck, his hands grasping and stroking every inch of her. “I missed you so much. When I thought I’d lost you...”
“You almost did,” she told him. “You’re lucky I’m so forgiving.”
He laughed, sending a puff of air brushing over her neck. “I am lucky.” He hugged her closer. “I’m not going to let you change your mind, either. You’re stuck with me now, and I don’t plan to let you forget it.”
Since that sounded pretty good to her, Ava wasn’t complaining. She lay her head on his chest, listening to the steady thump of his heart. It felt right.
“I want to hear you say it.”
“Hmm?” She lifted her head to look at him.
Her clothes felt too tight. It was so warm in here. He ran his hand up the back of her coat, which was much too heavy to be wearing anyway, and cupped the back of her head, turning it until she was facing him. “Look at me and tell me that you want the job.”
She raised one hand and placed it over her heart. “I solemnly swear that I want the job.”
“And me?”
She knew that look in his eyes and shivered in delicious anticipation. “And you.”
“Is that all?”
“Isn’t that enough?” She kissed him once, then again, until they were both breathing harder. Her heart was so full that she was sure it would burst and it would be wonderful.
He cupped her face and looked at her. “No, you have to promise that the next time I act like an idiot, you’ll stick around.”
“I’m not the one who left,” she pointed out, watching as he unbuttoned her coat, spreading the heavy fabric wide.
“I’m not leaving again.” He spanned her stomach with his hands, slipped them around her back and beneath her silky tee. She ached at his touch. “I was going crazy without you.”
She shivered from his words and his hands. Her skin grew tight with need. She closed her eyes and let her head droop. “I was going crazy, too.” His fingers were doing the most delightful things, making her insides feel all fuzzy. She missed this, missed him so badly. She wanted more—more of this, more of him. She gasped when his fingers hit a particularly sweet spot and felt a shudder of pleasure melt her brain. And slipped right off the edge of the cliff.
He was murmuring in her ear, the combination of hands and words drowning her in need. And that’s when those three little words she hadn’t dared to say, to even think, just slipped out as if they’d been lying in wait.
“I love you, Jake.”
She felt him still and her eyes popped open immediately. Oh, no. No, no, no. It wasn’t supposed to come out like that. He was studying her, but she couldn’t read his gaze. Oh, God.
This was all wrong. He was supposed to say it first and she was supposed to look up at him with large, coy eyes and smile sweetly before telling him that she loved him, too. Now he was going to get all panicky and weird and tell her that things were moving too fast.
“I mean that. I love that.” But it was too late. They both knew it. Ava closed her eyes and ducked her head. She was not looking at him. No way. No how. She wanted to die, wanted a big hole to open up in the floor that she could jump into and never return.
He caught her chin, forced it up. “Say it again.”
His eyes burned into her. She swallowed, lifted her chin without his help. “I love that.”
“No.” His eyes were dark. “The other thing.” She squeezed her eyes shut. “And look at me when you do.”
Fear clawed at her throat, and her skin itched. She tensed, preparing to jump off his lap, stumble out the door and away from him. And if she broke an ankle in her escape? Small price to pay.
But his hands were locked around her hips, holding her firmly in place. And she knew she wasn’t going to get away quite so easily.
“Ava.”
Why did he have to say her name? Why now? When she was so near to breaking?
“Tell me.”
She opened her eyes slowly, telling herself that it was best to meet this kind of challenge head-on. Her heart accelerated, but her voice was clear. “I think we both know what I said.”
“We do, but I’d like to hear it just to be sure.”
She glared at him.
“Don’t be shy.” He slipped a hand up her back, the feel of his palm on her skin making her shiver. Her fear slipped and then drifted away. He wasn’t pushing her to say it again just so he could tell her he wasn’t interested.
“You first,” she said.
He laughed. “Too late for that. Say it.” His eyes softened and he pressed a tender kiss to her jawline. “Please.” His lips trailed up to her ear.
Ava’s toes curled. “I hate you for making me do this.” She gasped when he ran his tongue across her neck. “But I love you.”
�
��That’s what I thought.” She got a flash of that smug smirk of his before he kissed her hard and hot and so perfectly that Ava almost forgot he hadn’t returned the sentiment.
Almost.
“Hey.” She pulled back and frowned at him. “I’m not the only one who should be saying something here.” Where was his declaration of undying love? His claim that she completed him? She’d even settle for a little kissing of her feet. “Don’t you want to say something?”
“Yes, you’re hired.” His hand cupped her head, pulled her toward him for one of those brain-washing kisses. She could feel the smile on his lips when they touched hers.
“I already had the job, remember?” She turned her head to the side, shivered when he trailed his mouth down her neck instead. “But that’s not what I’m waiting to hear. And just in case you’re wondering, you aren’t getting any of this—” she gestured to herself “—until you do say it.”
He laughed, head thrown back, the tension that had been bracketing his eyes gone. “You say the sweetest things.”
“Still waiting.”
He captured her hands when she rested them against his chest. She could feel the thump of his heart echo through her. “I love you, Ava.”
She pulled one hand free, ran it through his hair and tugged him forward so their lips were touching. “Was that so hard?”
ENTNEWSNOW.COM/AVASBLOG
So Long, Farewell
Big news. Along with my current gig as cohost of Entertainment News Now, I will be hosting a travel show, as well. (Look for me on airplanes soon!)
But all this extra work means I won’t have time to update this blog with any regularity. This will be the last official post. I’ve loved every minute of it, but it’s time to move on. Wishing you all much love and excellent gossip.
Kiss kiss,
Ava
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Keep reading for an excerpt from The Spirit of Christmas by Liz Talley!
That Weekend... Page 29
